/N: It's short, it's sad, and it's another AkuRoku, because I'm so addicted to them.

Summary: How many times can Roxas say he's sorry? Song Fic. Implied AkuRoku. The lyrics are for "Gomenasai" - T.A.T.U.

Disclaimers: Blah, blah blah, ancient history, they are not mine, and you know the rest... XD


"What I thought wasn't mine
In the light
Was a one of a kind,
A precious pearl"

I'm sorry…

I know my acid words started to hurt you somewhere along the way. But you still kept coming for me. Like a dog that never really gets hurt by the thousandth hit on the tail. I've never learnt to truly appreciate you presence. I thought you were the stupid one. Boy, I was SO wrong…

"When I wanted to cry
I couldn't cause I
Wasn't allowed"

I'm sorry…

For never being the friend you needed me to be. For never being there. For letting you cry and doing nothing. For forgetting you were there for me when no one else cared. For forgetting you're the only one that would let me cry when I had no other way out.

"Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now"

I'm sorry…

Because I was just so damn self-centered and blind. If I had a heart, it would have been made of stone. But even then, your fire would have melted it down. It did anyway, didn't it? It just took me way too long to notice it. And I miss so much that fire.

"What I thought wasn't all
So innocent
Was a delicate doll
Of porcelain"

I'm sorry…

I left too soon. And you came for me just a little bit too late. Not your fault, I guess. We're both the same thing, right? You're just as stubborn as I am. We both had questions. I know now that I wouldn't break without the answers I wanted. But you…

"When I wanted to call you
And ask you for help
I stopped myself"

I'm sorry…

The last thing I got to see was you through someone else's eyes. And you didn't even know I was there.

I wanted to reach you. Hold your hands in mine. Feel your heat burning my skin. Hear your laugh and see your eyes doing that weird glowing thing they always did when you looked at me.

But then I remembered that my hands weren't exactly mine anymore. And I gave up.

"Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now"

I'm sorry…

That for the first time I was really there for you, it was the last time you would be there for me. And I needed you to be here again. Like I never had before.

"What I thought was a dream
A mirage
Was as real as it seemed
A privilege"

I'm sorry…

I don't know if I ever had a real heart. But I never needed one to know how I felt about you. You did that to me. I just didn't know how to say it. I think the only reason we need a heart is that without it, we can't voice the feelings we have inside our chests. Like knowing the words, but not having a tongue to speak them out loud.

"When I wanted to tell you
I made a mistake
I walked away"

I'm sorry…

I never got to say it while you could hear me. And I never let you say it to me. I always ran from it. And now I'll have to imagine how it would be like to listen to it inside whatever I have left of myself for the rest of my existence.

"Gomenasai, for everything
Gomenasai, Gomenasai, Gomenasai
I never needed a friend,
Like I do now"

I'm sorry…

The best use I can give to the heart I now somehow possess is to fill it with regret for never telling you how much I loved you. I think it should be used for things so much better than that. I wanted to know what you think of it.

"Gomenasai, I let you down
Gomenasai, Gomenasai,
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now"

I'm sorry…

I'm going to have to accept that I just won't. You know the worst part of it? I can't even cry for you. Because the eyes through which I see now aren't even mine for real. But even if I could cry, it wouldn't be the same.

Because you won't be here to dry my tears.