A/N- Just a little scene, spawned from a conversation with bittereloquence. So it's her fault, really. Three gestalt commanders bond in a brig over energon and irritating teammates.
Silverbolt glanced up as Hot Spot walked into the brig, cubes of energon tucked under his arm.
"How's our prisoner?" Hot Spot asked, taking the chair Silverbolt pushed his way.
The Aerialbot commander glanced over his shoulder. Onslaught didn't look up, lounging against the wall of his cell.
"Quiet," Silverbolt answered. Hot Spot just nodded, leaning back in his chair with a sigh.
"Mind if I stick around for a while?"
Silverbolt grinned. "Team getting too much for you?" he teased.
Hot Spot just groaned. "Can I stuff them all in a utility closet and leave them for a day?" he asked wearily. "If they spent half as much energy on something constructive…"
"They'd be unstoppable," Silverbolt finished for him with a laugh. "Blades?
"Worse… Streetwise and Groove are arguing. Again. And they won't shut up."
Silverbolt winced. "Hey, at least you don't have Air Raid trying to convince the more gullible members of your team to try flying down Hell's Canyon at Mach one," he said dryly.
"Look on the bright side," Onslaught's smooth voice interrupted," None of your teammates have ever sold you for spare parts."
The two Autobots stared at him, uncertain whether or not he was joking.
"Slingshot," Silverbolt continued after a moment. "Need I say more?" he said with a groan, looking back to Hot Spot. "He does his best to goad anyone in range then plays the victim when they haul off and belt him. Slag, I've been tempted to belt him."
"You think Slingshot's bad, you should deal with Blades for a week. At least Slingshot isn't trying to start brawls," Hot Spot grunted.
"I see your helicopter, and raise you Vortex," the Combaticon said blandly. "Be glad 'sadomasochism' isn't listed among your teams' faults."
"Fireflight still flies into walls," Silverbolt offered.
"Brawl gets into fights with walls," Onslaught countered.
Hot Spot blinked. "…Who won?"
"The ceiling. It fell on him," Onslaught told him dryly.
Silverbolt choked on a mouthful of energon.
"Go ahead and laugh. Megatron didn't." His visor dimmed. "That third cube for consumption, or just decoration?"
"And to top it all off," Hot Spot continued as Silverbolt got up to hand the energon to Onslaught, "First Aid is furious with Blades for getting into fights over him. Blades, of course, just gets angry and denies it – but so much as look at Aid the wrong way, and he'll punch your faceplate in."
"Hey, at least he's protecting his team mate," Silverbolt pointed out cheekily.
The look Hot Spot shot him was less than elated. "Wanna trade?"
"I'd trade both of you," Onslaught said flatly.
"I'm not sure I would want to tangle with Brawl," Silverbolt said ruefully.
Onslaught waved a hand dismissively. "Brawl is easy. Try pointing over his shoulder and yelling 'What's that?' sometime." He sipped his energon. "Or ask him a complicated question and he'll be occupied for hours."
"Meaning of life questions?" Hot Spot cocked his head.
"I was thinking more along the lines of 'What's one plus two?' personally," the Combaticon said blandly.
"I think we should take a vacation and let them deal with their problems for once," Silverbolt said when they stopped laughing. "Maybe if Slingshot didn't have anyone to hide behind, he'd grow up a little. And trying to herd Fireflight and Air Raid in a straight line for a week or two would do him good."
Onslaught snorted. "Might actually shut Blast Off up for once."
Hot Spot's visor glowed. "I think I'd leave Groove in charge."
"He'd drive Streetwise up the wall." Silverbolt smirked.
"And back down the other side," the Protectobot agreed. He downed the last of his energon. "Well, I need to get back up there and see if they've managed to kill each other yet," he said, standing.
"See you after shift?" Silverbolt asked.
"Yeah. Onslaught," he acknowledged, nodding to the Combaticon. Onslaught flicked his hand in a casual salute as Hot Spot left to wrangle his team back into some semblance of order.