Oh my God!!! I saw The Mighty Boosh Live last night (or Wednesday night, depending on when this fic gets posted!) and it was so amazing!!! One of the best nights of my life! They are both so much hotter in real life than on the telly! (And they're pretty hot on telly!)

Chavese - officially the best accent ever!

And Julian Barratt looked at me! He actually looked at me! I swear I nearly died. We had eye contact for about 5 seconds, then I mouthed 'I love you' at him and he looked a bit scared and looked away…sometimes I'm a bit crazy…But still, the eye contact was there!WAS SO AMAZING! Still on a Boosh high!Anyway, now I've expressed my delight (which may be a little OTT, but I have a major obsession. Not many people understand it lol) I'll give you the final chapter! Enjoy!

Dedication: Jaquettie. Because you know who you are, when you're you.

Vince sat on the sofa, sipping the glass of wine Howard had just handed him.

"What do you want to watch, little man?" Howard asked, peering at their DVD collection.

Vince shrugged, then realised Howard had his back to him and couldn't see the gesture. "Dunno. You pick."

Howard looked round, concerned. "Are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm fine. Why?"

"You've never let me pick a DVD before, in case I choose one of my jazz films. This isn't like you, Vince."

"Whatever Howard." he put down his glass with slightly more force that was necessary, causing the wine to slosh over the side and onto the table. "I don't feel like a film anymore anyway. I'm going to bed." Howard grabbed his arm to stop him leaving. "Get the fuck off me."

"Not until you talk to me." Howard reached out and squeezed his shoulder gently. "it's not healthy to bottle everything up."

"Who says I'm bottling stuff up?!" Vince exclaimed furiously. "This is me, this is what 'Vince Noir' is all about. It's what I was like before! I go out and I get smashed and I dress in stupid outfits, because if I do that…" tears suddenly sprung up out of nowhere, and the anger drained from his eyes. "…because if I do that, it's like it never happened. Like Bainbridge never took me. Like I never left." he lowered his head and his voice became so quiet Howard had to strain to hear him. "Like people never abandoned me."

Howard was at a loss as to what to say. He put his arms properly around Vince and hugged him close as he sobbed his heart out on Howard's shoulder. "Oh, Vince…" he rested his cheek on top of Vince's head, "why didn't you say all this sooner?"

Vince shrugged. "I…I thought it was stupid."

"Vince, it's not stupid." pressed his lips softly to Vince's forehead. "You shouldn't have had to go through this. If I'd only driven you to Topshop in the van that day…"

"He'd have gotten me on another day. Or worse, gotten you." Vince looked right into his eyes, and Howard felt his heart skip. "I don't think I'd have been able to be as strong as you were. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"The same as always, only with less nagging about it?"

Vince let out an involuntary chuckle, which made Howard smile. "You're an idiot Howard."


Vince reached out and rubbed his thumb across Howard's cheek, drying tears the older man wasn't even aware he'd shed. "But you're my idiot."

The smile faded from Howard's face. He looked uncertainly at Vince, and saw he'd gone slightly red. "Vince…?"

The hand didn't move from his cheek. "Howard…you know when I was still trying to remember who I was? Um…well, when I…"

"You two in?" Naboo's voice sounded from the stairs. Vince stayed looking into Howard's face before slowly withdrawing his hand and sitting back down.

"Yeah, Naboo, we're up here."

Howard barely listened as the shaman and Bollo came up and began talking about Saboo being a tit to Tony Harrison, or about Tony Harrison, or something. His mind was on the moment he had just had with Vince. He wasn't sure what was going on.

Two weeks later

Vince cried the day Bainbridge was sentenced. He'd refused to come down to the courthouse, but the whole trial had been closely followed on television so he'd found out the verdict before Howard got home. He'd found him curled in a foetal position on his bed, crying bitterly.

Howard sat gingerly down next to him and laid a hand on his arm. "Vince? Hey, come on little man, it's over. He's been put away for life. You don't have to worry anymore."

"I know." Vince sniffed.

Howard hesitated, then lay down beside him and put his arm round him. Vince instantly rolled over so that he was facing into the embrace and snuggled against Howard.

"What happened?" he asked once he was settled.

"Well, based on your's, mine, and Fossil's evidence, there wasn't really any other outcome. He pleaded for insanity, but it was rejected." he clenched a fist. "That bastard knew exactly what he was doing."

"How is Fossil?"

"Same as ever."

Bob Fossil had been found about 3 days after Bainbridge was arrested. He'd been in an abandoned warehouse in the country, potentially the same place Vince had been kept. Rather disturbingly, he'd seemed almost disappointed to be rescued from Bainbridge's 'torture chamber'.

"It doesn't really make any difference, does it?"

Howard frowned, concerned. "What do you mean?"

"So he's in prison, big deal. That doesn't change the fact that he did it. I…I can still remember what he…what he did to me."

Howard bit his lip. Vince was still insisting on living his 'party lifestyle', despite what he'd admitted to Howard about why he did it, and Howard had privately hoped that once Bainbridge was behind bars he'd calm down slightly and see he didn't have to try so hard. Seemingly it wasn't going to work like that.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." Vince said, shuffling a little closer to Howard. Almost his entire body was pressed against the older man now, and Howard was surprised to realise he didn't mind. When had he stopped disliking people touching him? Or was it just Vince he didn't mind…?

Howard woke the next morning to realise he was still lying fully clothes on top of Vince's bed. The two of them had lain there for hours, before falling asleep. Glancing down at Vince, Howard saw his brow was creased into a slight frown. He considered for a second about waking him up, then decided against it. Vince hadn't slept anywhere near enough for weeks, and Howard wasn't going to disturb the one good night's sleep he'd seen him have.

He carefully untangled his arms from around his friend's sleeping form and walked out into the kitchen, switching on the kettle. He wished he knew a way to make him feel better…

Unbidden, the memory of that 'moment' a few weeks ago swam into his mind. What had Vince been going to say to him? Whatever it was, he hadn't mentioned it again.

It probably wasn't about what he'd said in the alley, about 'liking' Howard anyway, he reasoned. He was fooling himself. As if a sparkly sunshine person like Vince could ever be attracted to a dull, jazzy, person like Howard.

Although Vince had been far from sunshine and sparkle lately, despite what he wanted the world to think.

"Hey." Vince emerged, rubbing his eyes sleepily. Howard smiled at him.

"Hey. You hungry?"

"No, thanks Howard." he noticed Howard watching him with a concerned expression. "Relax, will you? I'm not turning anorexic or anything. I'm just not hungry."

"Ok." Howard said, turning back to the kettle. "Tea?"

"No thanks."

Howard made himself his drink, very aware that Vince was still hovering around in the kitchen.

"You staying in tonight?" Howard asked hopefully.

"No. I'll probably go out with Leroy."

"Right." Howard bit his lip, determined not to say anything. "Why?" it took him a couple of seconds to realise he'd spoken anyway, and mentally slapped himself.

"Because it's fun."

"No, it isn't."

"Piss off Howard. Nothing means anything, so why does it matter what the fuck I do?"

"What do I have to do?"

Vince blinked. "What?"

"What do I have to do to make you stay in with me?"

Vince stared at him for several seconds, then looked away. It could have just been the light, but Howard thought he'd gone slightly pink.

"Stop being weird, Howard. You're such a freak sometimes."

"Don't push me away, Vince. Please." Howard could still remember Vince's insistence that he didn't like it when they didn't speak, yet here he was trying his hardest to push Howard out of his life. It didn't make sense. For a second, he thought Vince was going to yell at him, but then the younger man's face seemed to droop slightly and he looked tired.

"I'm sorry, Howard. I don't mean to. I've just got a lot of stuff to work through."

"I understand that Vince, but…"

"Not that stuff."

Now Howard knew Vince had gone pink. Ah. He took a sip of his tea. "You do remember then."


"You know what. You remember, I take it?"


"I…see." so that was it. Vince was awkward about the fact that he'd told Howard he fancied him. "Vince, it's no big deal, really. I mean, you were ill, you weren't yourself."

"Right. Ill. Yeah."

"Weren't you?"

Howard could have kicked himself. Why was he continuing to torture himself?


"Exactly, I mean…wait, what?"

"No, I wasn't ill. I mean, I was, but…what I said to you in that alley, before…" he swallowed nervously, "…before Bainbridge showed up. I…I meant it."

"You…" Howard stared at him in disbelief, more than half expecting Vince to start laughing and say it was all a joke.

"I just…I still want us to be friends Howard. I know you would never…"

Howard put down his mug and pulled Vince into a hug. "We'll always be friends, Vince. Nothing could change that."

"Yeah?" Vince looked up at him with a hopeful smile and Howard felt a rush of affection for him.

"Actually, that's not true. I think maybe this might."

Vince looked confused for a split second, before Howard leant down and kissed him softly on the lips. Howard instantly felt an explosion go off inside him, and wondered what on earth had made him wait so long to do this. He pulled back and looked down at Vince anxiously. The younger man had his eyes half closed and a dazed expression on his face.

"Vince?" he received no response, so he laid a hand lightly on his friend's shoulder. "Vince?"

Suddenly, Vince launched himself at Howard and kissed him full on, with such passion that Howard stumbled backwards and fell onto the sofa, pulling Vince down with him. He felt Vince's tongue against his lips and froze. Vince instantly pulled back, looking almost surprised at what he'd just done.

"Wow…um…I'm sorry, I just…you…"

Howard did the only thing he could think of to stop Vince rambling and kissed him again. Not with quite the passion of Vince's kiss, but still enough to warrant a small moan from the younger man's throat which made Howard incredibly glad he wasn't standing up, because he felt sure he'd have fallen over if he had been.

After several minutes, Vince pulled away and nuzzled his face into Howard's neck. "You're an idiot." he said softly.

"Thanks." Howard replied. "Why?"

"What the hell took you so long to kiss me?"

"Er, excuse me, I don't remember you kissing me before now either!"

"Yeah, well…wouldn't have been any good for my reputation, would it?"

Howard mock-pouted. "So, what about your reputation now?"

Vince lifted his head up and looked Howard in the eye. "It doesn't matter." he hesitated. "Can I tell you something?"


"I hate my outfits."


"Some of them are so tight and uncomfortable, you know? I mean, a lot of them are genius, but…" he shrugged. "And I don't like going out every night. And I don't want my hair to be black again, I want it like I had it back at the zoo, and…"

Howard laughed and kissed him again. "Vince, do whatever makes you happy. I love you whatever you look like, and however you act. Just…as long as its because that's what you want to do, not what other people expect."

Vince grinned and nodded. "Ok."

Howard lay down on the sofa and Vince nestled in next to him. He smiled. Vince still had a lot of issues to work through, but they would manage it.



It was only about 20 minutes later, when Howard had drifted back to sleep, that Vince realised he'd told him he loved him. He looked down at Howard's face, and smiled.

Suddenly, it all meant something again.

Finished! Not 100 percent happy with this ending, but it's the best I can come up with, so I hope you guys like it!

Thanks to everyone who's reviewed (and who reviews this chapter), you guys are great!

I'm seriously gonna miss this story now it's done, I really enjoyed writing it!

Love! xx