Okay I basically wrote this because I was really bored. Enjoy! I used the drunk driver joke by Demitri Martin because it reminded me so much of L and Light. I am also using an OC. Yes again.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Joke used in this fan fic. I do not own ANY characters except for Mika.
'How the hell did this happen to me?!' Light Yagami thought sitting in the front seat of his wrecked car. He looked in the back seat. Ryuzaki was asleep and his younger sister was reading a magazine. Light sighed as he scratched his head. His brown hair was drenched with blood from where the glass hit him.
"So, Mika…" He said looking back at the young girl. "You wouldn't happen to have a phone would you?"
"Yes but it has no minuets."
"DAMN!" Light said hitting his face on the steering wheel.
"I could see if Ryuu-Kun has one."
"Okay, you do that while I have a flashback."
Misa Amane had thrown a birthday party for her boyfriend light. She had rented a huge mansion for the occasion. The music was loud and everybody she knew was there. Everything was going great, except for one thing. L and Light were still handcuffed. She took out her chainsaw and slowly walked over to a drunk L who was babbling about the BB murder case again.
"Yagami-kun, will you please come here?" The intoxicated detective shouted tugging on the handcuffs.
Light walked two steps to his raven-haired friend. "Yes, Ryuzaki?"
"It seem we-'' He hiccupped. "Have run out of sake and wine…will you drive us to the seven eleven?"
"Us?" Light repeated. As he said that a small black haired girl walked from behind L.
"I am Mika." The girl said in the same bored tone as L. "I am Ryuzaki's little sister."
Lights eyes looked like they were going to pop out of their sockets. 'Great, another one!' He thought giving himself a mental kick in the face. "Yea sure I'll drive you guys to the store."
L and Mika sat in the back. L was telling Mika to make sure she sat like him so she could have a higher I.Q. level than Light.
"Yes big brother." She said annoyed. "But what if I already have a better I.Q. than Mr. Yagami…?"
Light growled. 'How dare she?' He thought gripping the steering wheel. 'She's just a child and I shall be god of the new world!' "Muhahahahahahaha!"
"Um, Mr. Yagami, are you okay?" Mika asked tapping Light's shoulder.
"O-oh, yes I'm fine."
"Now, Light." L slurred. "There's no need to hide anything from my sister, actually I would have let you marry her if you weren't Kira." L hiccupped again. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"
"Um L…" Light said looking back.
"Don't try to talk to him, he's at maximum drunkage now." Mika took out a Shonen jump and started reading it.
"Okay…" Light pulled into the seven eleven.
"Lets go Yagami-Kun." L said stumbling out of the car.
Mika watched as Light and her older brother walked into the store. "Finally some peace." She said getting a bottle of sake out from under her shirt. She started to drink until the boys came back. She hid the Sake bottle under Light's seat.
Light started driving back to the mansion and L was drinking more and more Sake and wine.
"Yagami-Kun, turn left." L slurred.
"Those are trees."
"If you don't you're Kira!"
The car turned left and hit the trees. A sake bottle flew out of L's hand and hit light in the head drenching him with the alcohol. The glass on the drivers seat shattered hitting Light in the head.
"Thanks, Ryuzaki." Light hissed.
"He has a cell phone with him." Mika said holding a red cell up.
"Yes!" Light said throwing his hands in the air.
"DAMN!" Light said hitting his head on the steering wheel.
A police car pulled up to Lights car and a man with large hair stepped out. It was Aizawa.
"Excuse me sir, will you please step out of the car?" Aizawa said shining a flashlight in Light's face.
Aizawa made light take several drug tests before arresting him for drunk driving. He also found a sake bottle under Light's seat. As Aizawa and Light drove away L stepped out of the car with his sister.
"That was fun." He said smiling.
Sorry it was so short. Like I said I was really bored when I wrote this. I hope you liked it!