Aftershocks

Aftershocks

Disclaimer: I do not own House.

So wow what a season finale huh? I was way off…

Anyway this story takes place after we see House and Cuddy holding hands. Angst pursues…Huddy…Italics are their thoughts.


He sees her feels her holding his hand. "I'm here" she whispered his ears nearly failing him as sleep overwhelmed his dying body. I need to speak…

"I…" Cuddy hushed him like soothing a child. A child…you would have made a great mother, Cuddy.

"There is no need to speak. I'm here. I'm here." She's here; she keeps repeating this mantra... I won't forget…stay with me…I can't be alone……

Cuddy watched House relax under her comforting words and try to welcome the fatigue that was so greatly desired. She brushed her slender fingers through his matted hair Sweat and blood had made their home within his veins. Too many swell within one….the dam will break soon… Her hand ran gently over his features taking in their lines, worn and old…before his time…He stirred softly at her touch…welcoming it…embracing it….He wants this…Cuddy bit her lip. Her hand found his and clasped it tightly, reveling in it. Enjoy this moment, for it may be the last.

Keeping her hand in his, Cuddy sat in the chair next to her patient…friend and closed her eyes accepting the certainty of this one moment. House was safe in her hand if just for one moment.


House's sleep was fitful at best. His already deeply damaged brain ached for solace. He could still see flashes of Amber, broken and bloody. The only moment that gave him peace was the radiant glow she offered to him…such honesty….I deserve the hate….God so much hate….from him …from within

In his dreams he could see wilting roses and unopened bottles of sherry lined in a row. Too much to take in….His feet could feel the grass beneath and the pain of shattered glass. He was walking a fine line of life…a line we all have to access at some point. He felt his hospital gown blowing…unseen wind….maybe it brings needed redemption…. I am so tired.

House continued to walk on wishing yearning to know if his decision was right. To live should not have to be a decision left for someone to make. It is bestowed not earned…. In my case it was bartered in return for another one too many times…

He bent down to pick at the flowers around the amber colored sun. He closed his eyes…Amber…her name will never be forgotten on his mind or lips.

At her name, he stirred briefly from his slumber. His eyes took a moment to adjust to his surroundings. Cuddy by my side…always… Wilson? House looked to the glass. A face was staring back at him. Another hallucination or a long lost friend? House saw the sadness and grief etched in this face. Once a face that saw me and my antics…now sees through me as if I don't exist….he doesn't want me to exist…

I wish I could call to him and tell him how sorry I am... how…

I wish it were me instead.

House watches his friend turn to go leaving him alone. Song lyrics rush to House's head…a baby sleeps in all our bones….makes me scared to be alone….

Alone….

He feels a hand grip his tenderly, achingly…gentle squeezes in her sleep to let me know I am not alone… hold me….

Cuddy felt the change …it whispered in her bones. She opened her eyes. He is still holding my hand. She noticed his face staring off at the wall. Cuddy pulled herself out of the chair never once letting go. House felt the shift but did not make eye contact. Self loathing has given birth to self pity…

"House?"

He knew in his heart that he should at least look at her. She had been through just as much as any of them had. Only a day ago, she had brought him back to life by breathing into his dying lungs. She once saved me with her lips…now she saves me with her hand.

"Can you hear me?"

House blinked once. I need to hear your voice Cuddy…I need to hear my own…

"Cuddy…" it was raspy and broken but a beautiful sound nonetheless to her ears. The tears she had blinked back to be strong for him and for herself were weakened by one name. One word holds so much power…

"It's me." I can barely speak myself.

His eyes…beautiful and blue speak volumes in themselves. Slight trembles and uncertainties mixed with tears. I am weak in the knees at the sight of him….

"Please…" Cuddy sits down on his bed ever so gently, taking in House's plea. She wants this too. With careful moment on her part, she leans into his chest feeling the rhythm of a beating life.

House wrapped his arm around her shoulders holding her as close as he possibly could. She was all he had left.


Do you like it? Should I continue or not? Please review and let me know! Mentioned song lyrics belong to the wonderful song in "Wilson's Heart" called

Passing Afternoon by Iron and Wine