Insanely long Author's Note before the stories (yeah, that's right, plural

Insanely long Author's Note before the stories (yeah, that's right, plural! Lol) start:

Okay, I know that I really should be updating my other stories, but this is just something that I wanted to post for the future... you'll get it as you read on. Okay, I've decided that posting up a new story every time I want to write a one shot is like, wasting space. Don't ask why, my weird brain just works that way. So, basically, every time I want to write a story that's really, really short (also known as a short story to the rest of the world, or a one-shot) I'm going to post it here. I know this is only an author's note, but I promise to make a minimal of these in the future. Actually, I think this is my only author's note so far on a separate page/chapter, or whatever you want to call it.

Each page will have a title, but it's not the chapter title, it's the story title. Please keep that in mind. These stories will probably have NOTHING to do with each other, and although I do enjoy reading reviews, I don't want to sit there and read ten reviews asking me why one chapter has nothing to do with the next. Kapiche? (Okay I have no idea whether or not that's how you spell that word, but that's beyond the point) Some chapters may have similar plots if I can't think up a new idea for a story, but want to post just because, you know? Okay, so you probably don't know, but anyway, yeah.

Man, have I GOT to stop inserting the word anyway into a sentence randomly, and have an awkward silence after. Ooh shiny! Yeah. So, each story's going to have a separate summary at the top of it, so if you're too lazy to read a story, (in which case I do not understand why you're on fan fiction) and you think that you won't like my story –cries— there's going to be a short—one paragraph—summary at the top. Repeat: SUMMARY AT TOP. The first paragraph of any given page after this in this 'story' is not actually a part of it. Again, kapiche?

I guess that's all you really need to know about this. First one-shot will be up soon. By the way, Jacob Black and the Rubber Duck, my first one-shot is not here, and never will be unless someone requests it, which I doubt you will because umm... click away? So, yeah.

Again, forgot to mention (gosh, I'm doing that a lot lately, am I getting old, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Carry on) this, uh, thing, is unnamed, so far, so if anyone has any suggestions to what this collection should be called, please let me know. 'Collection of Twilight One shots' has already been thought up by the author, and said author decided that was lame, so please do not suggest something like that.

If you are someone who came to read this later on, and was too lazy too read the above AUTHOR'S NOTE: you can 1) go back and read it!! Ding, ding, ding, we don't have a winner. Anyway, you can either go do that, or you can read the following writing which shall be in bold: THIS IS A COLLECTION OF ONESHOTS; SUMMARY OF EACH IS AT THE TOP OF THE PAGE, TITLE IS OF STORY, NOT CHAPTER!! Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, something in between, or well... something else, though I think that includes everybody, thank you for reading the totally insanely long (at least in my opinion it is super long, but whatever) author's note. Have a nice day, yadda, yadda, yadda. Bye-bye! Oh, and forgot to mention it, but PLEASE REVIEW! (Though not necessarily for this, um, yeah)