Inoichi overreacts. A quick humor fic. Ino/Shikamaru. Rated K+/T. 3rd person POV.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Ino's Man
(Formerly: Don't Touch My Man)

"Eh, Nara!" a voice from behind Shikaku yelled, he turned to look and saw his old friend Inoichi coming up the hill he was climbing.

"Inoichi! What brings you here?" Shikaku asked his friend as the blond caught up with him.

"Wife's being a bit nagging today, thought I'd go for a walk. Yourself?" Inoichi responded.

"Shikamaru, my wife wants him for chores and she sent me looking for him," Shikaku grumbled unhappily.

"AHAHAHA! Your son sure is good for entertainment when he is avoiding work!" Inoichi teased as the two men searched for the 15-year-old boy. "Perhaps that place Ino says he goes all the time? For cloud watching. I think it's near their training ground."

"Worth a shot," Shikaku mused while the two headed for the hill. As they started climbing the hill, they could hear noises from the top, moans to be exact. Mischievous grins spread across their faces as they heard the noises.

Soon they were in a tree trying to see who it was Shikamaru was with. They watched earnestly as they saw Shikamaru on top of a young girl they had yet to identify.

"Looks like your boy doesn't avoid all types of work" Inoichi commented as loud moans came from the girl Shikamaru was adamantly kissing on the neck and lips.

"No, it appears he doesn't," Shikaku nearly cheered as he watched, a proud expression on his face.

From below they heard a panting voice mumbling, "Shika-kun..." After a few moments they heard laughing and giggling as the girl tried to flip them, a few tries later she succeeded and they saw her face.

"Shikaku?" Inoichi started, his eyes closed and his fists balled. Anger spreading across his previously calm expression.

"Yes, Inoichi?" Shikaku asked nervously.

"Your son is dead!" Inoichi yelled as he charged.

Ino giggled as she sat on Shikamaru's lap, he had let his hair down for once, and she was quite enjoying playing with it. She looked towards the forest when she heard rustling and what sounded like a struggle. "Shika-kun?"

"I heard," Shikamaru said with a sigh; a smidge annoyed at being interrupted with Ino.

"Move it Nara, I'm tellin' ya now he's gonna die, just accept it!" a voice yelled near by.

The two teens went wide-eyed. They sprang apart as Inoichi charged through the trees, kunai ready to go, Shikaku hot on his tail trying to subdue the enraged man.

"Touch my little girl! I'm going to murder you boy!" Inoichi yelled as Shikamaru dodged him, Ino stifling laughter as Shikamaru ran for his life.

"Inoichi think of how mad the wives will be if you kill him!" Shikaku tried to reason as he ran after the man chasing his only son. Inoichi stopped mid-motion of throwing a kunai at the tree Shikamaru was hiding behind.

"Good point!" Inoichi grumbled thoughtfully; Shikamaru slowly stuck his head out from behind the tree.

"Oh you wouldn't have to worry about Mama and Nara-sama, daddy, the one you'd have to worry about is me," Ino said super sweetly before turning a deadly eye on him, "No one touches my man."

All three males turned to look at the kunai armed girl and nodded vigorously as to not provoke her. She giggled and pulled Shikamaru from behind the tree, dragging him, wide-eyed and shocked, back to the hill.

"Inoichi?" Shikaku started after a few seconds.

"Yes, Shikaku?" Inoichi responded fearfully.

"You're paying for the wedding!" Shikaku teased and then ran off at top speed, an angered Yamanaka hot on his tail.