Disclaimer: C'mon, you don't really think I own Doctor Who, do you? I'm not even out of school yet!
A/N: This... is complete crack. Crack at it's finest. But entertaining crack, I hope. And my one fic, the '100 Prompts', I think I should delete that one, cause I kinda, uh... lostthelist. And I can't relocate it, so dang. And I will continue 'Incandescent', I'm just doing some... plot changes :)
Whenever the Doctor was bored, he tinkered with the TARDIS. It was much more satisfying messing with wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff then it was wasting his life away watching TV like his companions. (Curse the day they found out about all 5,000,000 channels) So on days like today, when he just woke up feeling bored, he could be often found with his feet sticking out from underneath the TARDIS counsel. And he was quite content doing so, too.
The Doctor winced as he hit his head on the top of the counsel.
"Is you're TV broken?"
"No…An' you're not 'fixing' it!"
"Go talk to Jack."
The Doctor decided he didn't want to know what she meant by 'busy'.
"Go talk to Martha."
"Er, she's with Jack."
"Oh. Alright than." He went back to fixing the TARDIS.
"Loads of help you are."
The Doctor sighed and got out from underneath the counsel, wiping his hands on his pants. He dully noted how Rose had to bite her lip in order to keep from laughing.
"Rose," He sighed, "I can't help with your lack of entertainment issues."
She gave him an odd look. "Didn't I agree to come with you so we could explore, or save worlds or somethin'?"
"Well, yes," He admitted, and then added hastily, "But I'm busy right now! And so are Martha and Jack."
Rose groaned and leaned back against the wall.
The Doctor sighed again and decided this might be the time to try it. The counsel didn't need that much fixing, anyway.
"Alright, Rose Tyler, I have something we can do. Go get Martha and Jack."
"We're here," Jack said from the entrance to the hallway, his arm around Martha's shoulder. Both look unnaturally flushed.
The Doctor grinned, "Fantastic."
He faced the counsel and began to push buttons and pull levers. It all looked so random to Martha, and she had to grin.
Jack sent a questioning look to Rose, who just shrugged in response.
The ground below them began to shake, and being the experienced TARDIS travelers that they were, they took this as a sign that they were about to land and grabbed the nearest column.
When it all stopped, Rose was the first to break the silence.
"So… where are we?"
The Doctor sent her a 100-watt grin.
"Go out and see!"
With a hesitant smile, Rose walked over to the door and pushed it open.
"Doctor," She began, sounding less than impressed, "Why are we in a parking garage?"
"Well, people would stare if a blue box suddenly appeared on their desk! Come on, Jack, Martha!" He sauntered over to the door, pushed Rose out ("Watch it!), and looked around.
"Ah, this is brilliant!"
Martha, who never thought she'd ever hear someone so ecstatic to be in a parking garage, followed him out loyally, and Jack followed Martha out lovingly.
"Now what?" Jack asked once they were all out in the garage.
The Doctor turned to Martha and Rose, "You ever gotten any of those annoying forward e-mails?"
"Ever gotten that one about the '101 Things to do in an Elevator'?"
"Yeah… oh no, Doctor, you aren't--"
"Yep!" He answered Rose gleefully, "I've always wanted to try those things! And you said you were bored, so this is the perfect time to try it!"
Jack, Martha and Rose all exchanged looks before Martha decided to be the voice of reason,
"Doctor, we can't actually do those things."
"Why not? Is there some law somewhere that states you can't?"
"Well, I'm up for it!" Jack grinned, and earned a grin from the Doctor as well.
"Why can't you two be more like Jack?" He asked his remaining two companions. Martha coughed and Rose raised an eyebrow. "Well, not in the whole flirt-with-everything-that-walks-and-some-that-don't sense of way." The Doctor shuddered just thinking about it.
After a couple minutes of silence, Rose nodded slowly,
The Doctor smiled and ruffled her hair fondly, "Knew you'd come around!" He turned to Martha and gave her a pleading look. And after a sharp nudge from the Doctor, Jack did too.
"Fine. Just nothing too bad, alright?" She gave Jack a pointed look. He grinned sheepishly.
The Doctor looked delighted.
"Alright, draw straws to see who's next." He pulled four straws out from his suit pocket ('So that's why he carries straws around!' Rose noted mentally) His eyes closed and his fingers shuffled the straws around. After a moment, he opened one eye to peer at his companions.
"No peeking!" He ordered. They all looked away and he grinned, satisfied, and went back to the straws. "Alright, Martha first!" The overjoyed Time Lord said once he was done.
Martha reached for the straws and pulled one out. Rose was next, and then Jack, and then himself.
"Hold 'em up!" The Doctor said as he held his own straw up. Rose and Martha's matched, his was a little shorter, but Jack's was the shortest.
"Jack," The Doctor said in an overly dramatic voice, "You are first! Step forward to receive you're task." He turned to Rose and winked, "Have 'em memorized."
Rose rolled her eyes.
The Doctor leaned in and whispered something in Jack's ear and Jack's eyes grew wide, but then he smiled,
"That's all? I'm a little disappointed."
Like I said, crack. Like it? Hate it? Tell me in a review!