Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.
Title: The Oblivious Strawberry
Summary: ShinjixIchigo. One-shot! Ichigo is oblivious. Too oblivious was he, in fact, to any attempt made by Shinji to express his deepest desires for the shinigami. Yaoi.
"Ichigo!" Orihime called, giggling happily at the sight of her crush. "How are you today?"
Ichigo's scowl faded a little as he answered, "Fine. How're you?"
"Oh, I'm just great! I..." The girl blushed as she tapped a finger on the mathematics book in her grasp. "Well..."
"What is it?" Concern was etched onto Ichigo's features. "Something bothering you? Is there a hollow? Is it..." Ichigo's eyes darkened, flicking to the classroom, "Hirako again?"
Orihime blushed and shook her head wildly. "Oh, no, no, don't worry! Shinji is only playing!"
Ichigo arched a pale eyebrow. "Are you sure? Because if you want me to do something about him—"
"I'm fine! Really! I just... I want..." Orihime threw her arms out and grinned, "I want you to have a great day!"
Ichigo rubbed at the back of his neck nervously, furrowing his eyebrows. "Oh, thanks, Orihime. You, too." Taking the first few steps into the classroom, Ichigo wondered, 'What was up with that? She always starts blushing and stuttering whenever I talk to her...' Being the oblivious vizard he is, Ichigo shrugged it off and narrowly avoided a tackle from Mizuiro and Keigo.
"Ichigo!" Keigo sang, slinging an arm around Ichigo's neck. "Good morning!"
Mizuiro poked Keigo in the ribs. "I think you're strangling him. Give him some space, man!"
Keigo waved him off with a wave of his hand. "Nonsense! Ichigo and I are best buds! I would never strangle him! Isn't that right, Ichi—" Keigo broke off, realizing that Ichigo wasn't paying attention to him. "Hey, Ichigo?" He waved a hand frantically in front of his face. "Are you even listening to me?"
Ichigo averted his eyes from whatever he had been staring at and gave Keigo a confused look. "What?"
"Ugh, never mind," Keigo whined, dropping his arm. "Let's go over there with all those hot chicks!" He gestured to the center of the room where numerous of their female peers had gathered to discuss the latest gossip.
"I don't really want to," Ichigo muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets, walking over to his desk.
"You party pooper, Ichigo!" Keigo stuck his tongue out before dragging a reluctant Mizuiro over to the group of females.
"But, Keigo, I like older women—" He was interrupted by Keigo's screech of, "You're coming with me because Ichigo won't!"
Ichigo sighed, rubbing his forehead in agitation. 'Finally.' He laid his head on the desk and stared at the wall next to the teacher's podium at the front of the room blankly. Suddenly, his view was blocked by an un-tucked school shirt and a blue-and-yellow-striped tie. Without bothering to look up, Ichigo grumbled, "What do you want, Hirako?"
"Ichigo," Shinji greeted with a nod, lazily flicking hair out of his eyes. "I don't want anything. I just came over here to greet you."
"Okay," Ichigo blinked, "you've greeted me. Now get lost."
"That's very impolite," Shinji scolded with a wave of his finger.
"I'm not in the best of moods, so I'd appreciate it if you would leave me alone."
Shinji's bottom lip protruded in a perfect pout. "But, Ichigo—"
"Shut up. You're annoying."
The blonde-haired vizard glared, insulted. "I am not. But, if you truly feel that way, I'll just go flirt with Orihime." Shinji held his breath, peering down at the spiky orange head.
Ichigo shot out of his seat and gripped Shinji's collar, ripping him close until they were centimeters apart. "Leave her alone, Hirako. She doesn't like it."
"How would you know?" Shinji inwardly cheered himself on for the close proximity of Ichigo. "She's just shy, that's all. I'm sure that with some persuasion..."
Ichigo scoffed, releasing the vizard. "Whatever. She may only appear to be shy to you, but she's shy to a lot of people. You have no right to take advantage of that. Orihime is a nice girl. Someone like you doesn't deserve to be near her."
Shinji crossed his arms and arched an eyebrow, lazy grin in place. "If you say so. I'm still gonna flirt with her."
"Hirako," Ichigo warned with a growl.
"Would you rather me stay here with you?" Shinji suggested, leaning forward with bright eyes. He batted his eyelids coyly. "Hm, Ichigo?"
Ichigo hauled Shinji down into the seat next to him. "Sit."
"So commanding," Shinji teased. "I like it."
The orange-haired vizard rubbed his temples and muttered something to himself. 'Stupid vizard.'
After only a few seconds of a lack of sound from the two, Shinji began to whistle merrily. He was quickly silenced by a punch to the shoulder.
The vizard tapped a finger to his lips in thought, mentally going through his list of plans for Ichigo. 'Step one: subtle hints.' He narrowed his eyes, and his small grin slid into place. "Hey, Ichigo?"
Ichigo grunted in reply.
"You know what I want right now?"
"I want a strawberry."
"Dipped in whipped cream and chocolate syrup."
"Practically begging to be devoured by me..."
Ichigo waved his hand at Shinji, clearing telling him to cease talking.
Shinji's eye twitched. 'It... it failed? My subtle hints never fail.' He grit his teeth together. 'Okay, step two: flirting.' He twirled a finger in Ichigo's hair and giggled. "Ichigo, wakey-wakey. Talk to me."
Ichigo sat up and gave Shinji a sour look. "Why are you doing this?"
"I just wanna talk to you. You seem so interesting." Shinji peered up at him from under his lashes. "What did you have for breakfast?"
"My sister's pancakes."
"What time did you get to sleep?"
"What do you do for fun?"
"What do you spend most of your time doing?"
"Who..." Shinji leaned forward, lowering his voice, "...do you like?"
Ichigo's expression became incredulous. "Nobody."
"I bet that's not true."
"Nobody, I said. Don't make me repeat myself."
Shinji pursed his lips. 'Step three: ask directly.' He blurted out, "Are you gay?"
"Gay. Homosexual. Out of the closet. Dropping the soap. Rainbows and unicorns. Skittles."
Ichigo's lips curled in disgust. "I am not gay."
"Just making sure." Shinji waved a dismissive hand. "I mean, it's not like I wanted you to be or something. No, not at all. I don't want you to be gay so I could do deliciously forbidden things to your person."
Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Nope. I'm not gay."
Shinji stared, unable to believe the object of his desires. 'Are you... kidding me? After all that? Oh, my oblivious strawberry, you're so pathetic yet adorable...'
Ichigo tapped a foot on the ground and stared at Shinji, his annoyance obvious. "I want you to go away, but if you do that, you'll just try to molest Orihime."
'This calls for drastic measures. Step four: persuasion.' Shinji leaned forward and licked his lips slowly, his eyes begging. "Ichigo..."
Ichigo arched an eyebrow. "What?"
The vizard whimpered softly and paused when his lips were next to Ichigo's ear. He whispered, "What are you doing later?"
"Fighting hollows. Kicking a kaizou konpaku and his porn magazines out of my room. Eating. Sleeping. The usual. Why?" Ichigo droned.
Shinji shook with embarrassment and dropped heavily into his seat. "Just wondering."
"You know... if you're asking to..." Ichigo shrugged, "...come over to my house and—"
Shinji threw his arms around Ichigo's neck, catching the attention of everyone in the room with his scream of, "YES! YES! TAKE ME, ICHIGO!"
"—hang out or something, you could just ask." Ichigo stared down at the blonde head buried in his chest. "I don't hate you that much. Plus, my sister Yuzu makes the best strawberry cheesecake."
Shinji dropped to the ground and sobbed, "That's not the kind of strawberry I was talking about..."
Ichigo continued awkwardly, "Well... you can also try my—" He was cut off when he was attacked again.
"YES! YES! I WANT ANY PART OF YOU, ICHIGO!"
"—sister's homemade strawberry ice cream..."
"Agh! Ichigo, you're so damn oblivious!"
"Hear, hear," Orihime spoke up timidly from the crowd that had gathered around the two teenagers.