A/N: Hey, Tis Kyrii again, giving you something new to read from the inner workings of her mind. This is set after OVA 2 of Fushigi Yuugi, but before Taka and Miaka have their child. I've been obsessed with FY again lately, and, the first part is based off of an RP I had with someone on Myspace. Uh...it's 4:18 AM when I'm writing this, so excuse me for the lack of interest here. Enjoy? ;

Warnings: Slight Spoilers! Shonen Ai (Soft ManXMan)! Might be Lime or Lemon in later chapters. Don't read if you're going to flame.

Disclaimer: I hope by now you all realize that Yuu Watase owns Fushigi Yuugi, not me! I just wish I did!!


What I'll Give...

Chapter One: Shun'u Meets...


"Tasuki, please, listen to me. You're being controlled by that woman! She gave you Kudoku!" The monk pleaded, looking up at male as he panted, blood coming from a deep wound in his stomach.

"You killed her! I don't care who ya are! You killed Katsumi!" The bandit shouted, kicking the monk in the ribs. He then walked over, grabbing the monk by the collar of his shirt, making him look at the girl. "What did she ever do to you? Huh? WHAT DID SHE EVER DO TO YOU?!" In his rage, he threw the monk hard against the wall. If only he could find his fan, he would have fried his ass already.

"T-Tasuki…"The monk managed to say, slowly getting up though his life was fading quickly. He then began walking to the enraged red head. "L-Look at her! She didn't love you, she was just buttering you up. Tasuki, SHE WAS GOING TO STEAL YOUR SOUL!"

The bandit paused, somewhere, deep in his gut, he knew this was true, but the feeling simply couldn't push past his clouded mind.

"Pl-ease, Tasuki, you've known me for years and…and you know I wouldn't lie to you." The older male stopped where he was, blood continuing to seep through his fingers as he looked at the bandit seriously. "You…of all people can't truly be controlled by such a drug."

Tasuki stood there, still looking enraged at the monk. But he could still feel it, like memories wanting to push through. "I…I…" Suddenly the image of the woman, teasing his body and whispering sweet nothings ran into his head. "I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!" He growled.

The monk stared at him sadly before moving towards him again, causing Tasuki to tense when the monk suddenly wrapped his arms around his waist. "I'm sorry." He said in almost a whisper, closing his eye as his weak body rested against the other's muscular form. "This…is all my fault…and now I'll…never even be able to make it right…"

He stood there, frozen. This male had the nerve to hug him after killing his beloved?! He fought the urge to knock him off, wanting to hear what the other had to say.

"Please, Tasuki-kun…promise me you'll be safe and...never forget that…I have and will…always love you." The monk finished weakly, a cold tear landing on the red head's bare shoulder.

Tasuki stood there completely frozen now, the monk now resting all of his weight on him. He remembered. He remembered it all now. "Chichiri…?" Nothing happened. "Hey. Stop joking around now." He wrapped his arms around the other's waist then, burying his face into his neck. "Come on Chichiri. Stop." No pulse. "Chichiri…answer me…Chichiri." He pulled away from him then, his eye closed and tears streaming down his face. "Heh, fine then, be that way. I'll just…take you home." He muttered, then picking the monk up bridal style. He hadn't even noticed the estate had faded around them. Slowly, he started trekking up the mountain, not even looking back to the dead woman on the ground.

"CHICHIRI!!" Tasuki yelled out as he shot up in his bed, panting as he looked around. When he found himself in his room in the bandit hideout, he let out a sigh of relief.

"Thank Suzaku; it was all just a nightmare." He muttered before turning to the monk's side of the bed only to freeze. It was empty. Tasuki began to shake as he stared at the cold, empty spot. Chichiri never left early, even if he got up at dawn and Tasuki slept in until noon.

There was then a knock on the door and Tasuki quickly turned to look at it.

"Knock Knock. Who's there? Kouji, here to see if the boss is feeling better. Oh Kouji, your concern is deeply appreciated, come on in! Thank you." The door then swung open, revealing none other then Kouji, the second-in-command of the Mt. Leikaku bandits.

"Kouji…" Tasuki said, staring at his friend as if he were a ghost.

"Hey Genrou, how you feelin'? He asked, walking closer to the bed.

"What are you talking about?"

"You've been asleep for a week now with a really high fever." Kouji responded, placing a hand to the red head's forehead. "Eh, you still need rest cause this fever ain't going down."

Well, that explained why Chichiri wasn't in bed with him. He was most likely worried that he would disturb his rest. Tasuki whacked his friend's hand away. "Well, I feel fine. So go get Chiri and tell 'im to get his ass in 'ere. And tell 'im I won't take no fer an answer."

Kouji stared at his friend before slowly turning away. "Sorry Genrou…but I can't do that. So, just lie down and get some rest. I'll have someone bring ya some food and water to drink later."

Tasuki glared at Kouji. "Kouji, just go get 'im. I don't care what he said; I need to see him right now."

The older bandit sighed, turning back to his friend. "Look, I can't get him right now but I promise you can see him when you're better."

Tasuki growled then, quickly getting up from his bed and grabbing Kouji, shaking him. "LOOK! YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I NEED TO SEE HIM RIGHT NOW! WHY CAN'T HE COME?!"

Kouji growled as he was shaken before looking away. "He can't come…because he's dead."

Tasuki's eyes widened as those words come from his mouth. "What…what did you just say? Haha, nice try Kouji but tell me the real reason."

Kouji continued looking away, not saying anything.


When Kouji continued saying nothing, Tasuki ran out of the room. "Chichiri! Chichiri where are you?!" He yelled out, looking into each and every room. When the search proved futile, he began running to where the previous boss, Hakurou, had been buried. He knew that often, Chichiri came here to pray. There was nothing though. Tasuki panted, falling to his knees, a headache building.

"Genrou, just stop this and get back in bed." Kouji said, leaning against the opening to the shrine.

Suddenly, Tasuki lunged at the older bandit, grabbing his collar. "WHERE IS HE KOUJI?!"

"The floating old hag appeared and took 'im to Mt. Taikyouku."

"I…I need to go there then." Tasuki said, pushing his friend away from him and beginning to walk out.

"Genrou yo-"

"Kouji…I…need to see him for myself…" Tasuki interrupted, his body shaking.

Kouji watched his friend who was practically falling apart. He let out a soft sigh then. "Alright, but I'm takin' ya."

"There's no need for that." An elderly voice suddenly said, seemingly coming from nowhere.

Before their very eyes, the shrine of Hakurou vanished to give way to a strange scenery of mountain peaks with a yellow sky above. There were purple bubbles floating everywhere. Tasuki knew this as Mt. Taikyouku.

"Taiitsukun," Tasuki said, turning to the old woman floating in front of him. "Let me see Chichiri."

"Tasuki, what your friend says is true."

"I don't care. Let me see him."

The woman sighed before waving her hand. One of the purple bubbles floated down until it was right in front of the red head, then something materialized inside. When Tasuki put out his arms, the bubble popped and the body of the monk fell into them.

Tasuki knelt down then, looking over his lover. He looked just as though he were sleeping after a night of love-making; that look of content over his face. Tasuki would have denied the fact that he was dead if his body wasn't so cold. Tears began streaming down his face. "Chichiri…I'm…I'm so sorry!" He then began sobbing, holding the monk to him. He knew now, he could remember everything that had happened. "I did this to him. I killed the only thing that meant everything to me."

"He died from a wound inflicted on him by the succubus Katsumi." The old woman corrected.

"But I let him bleed to death! I did nothing to stop it!" He yelled at her through tear filled eyes.

"You were infected by the drug Kudoku were you not?"

"I was but…"

"Then it is not your fault. It is simply Chichiri's misfortune."

"Chichiri…" Tasuki said, looking down at his lover again, tears falling from his eyes onto the other's face. "Please come back. I…I can't live without you!" He yelled out, holding him tighter to himself.

"Tasuki, Chichiri is dead and there's nothing you can do to bring him back." Taiitsukun said, the corpse disappearing. "It is best that you simply get over it and go on living your life."

"I just can't…forget about him. Taiitsukun, you don't understand! I can't survive without him! He's my other half!" The red head said, now looking up at the old woman. "I need him."

"What do you presume we do then Tasuki? He is dead and has already been reborn into the new world."

Tasuki looked down at the ground as he thought. What could he do to be with Chichiri again? "I want to leave this world, and be reborn into the next." He said as he stood then.

"What about romping around with your bandit buddies?"

Tasuki bit his lip as he then turned and looked back to Kouji, who was watching him. He then walked up to him. "Kouji, you…you understand why I need to do this…don't you?"

Kouji stared at his friend before he sighed and gave him a toothy grin. "Go on and go Genrou. I'll join ya there eventually so don't go causing too much mischief without me alright?" He said, ruffling Tasuki's hair.

Tasuki grinned at him. "I sure won't aniki!" He said before turning back to the old woman.

Taiitsukun sighed, looking him over. "Alright, but because of the circumstances, you will have many obstacles in this next life; instead of your memories of this life being sealed away. Are you still willing to do this?"

"Yes." He said without hesitation.

Tasiitsukun smirked. 'Oh Suzaku, what your warriors will do for love.'


Shun'u sighed as he walked along the streets of Japan, his eyes glancing from shop window to shop window. He was wearing a black wife beater with a black jacket over it, blue jeans to finish it off. Nineteen long years since that decision had been made, and still, he had nothing to show for it. Well, maybe it was better to grow up before finding his lover again, but he was nineteen now and, well, he hadn't even found the other seishi yet.

Letting out a sigh, Shun'u continued walking along. Damnit, Chichiri just HAD to be in Japan. He had to be... How would he find him otherwise? He thought back to what Tasiitsukun said when he first made the decision.

'You will have many obstacles in this next life.'

Had she meant when he was trying to find Chichiri? He had thought that she simply meant in life; which he had plenty of those too, with his parents dieing in a plane flight, himself being a high school drop out, and now having a ratty apartment with a low paying pizza delivery guy job, but that didn't bother him. His parents were asses, school was a pain, and he wasn't at home much anyway. He could look past all of that if he could only find his friends and his beloved.

Just then he heard something; no someone. He paused and listened.

"Dumplings! Get yer hot, fresh dumplings!"

Shun'u ran in the direction of the shout and grinned, tackling the man in front of the dumplings shop. "KOUJI!!"

The man was in shock before he grinned, tackling the red head back. "GENROU!!"

"How ya been man?! How'd ya get here?! Why are ya selling dumplings?!" Shun'u said as he square danced with his best friend. He looked him over, blinking slightly. Kouji now had black hair instead of his dark blue hair, plus he was missing his scar, but other then that, he was still same old Kouji.

"I've been good since I got here man! I died of illness back in the book, same one that Hakurou had. And I told ya, I was going to come after you! I asked the hag to do the same thing with me once I died and sure enough, here I am! And I'm just doing it for a few bucks today since the regular guy is sick." Kouji then turned. "Hey, I'm done fer the day!"

A male's voice carried from inside the shop. "Alright Koji, thanks for your help!"

"No prob!" Koji called back before turning back to Shun'u. "Well where you heading?"

"Just walking around really, lookin' for Chichiri ya know?" They then began walking along the street, blending back in with crowd.

"Bummer! I figured you two woulda been all lovey dovey holdin' hands while walkin' down the street by now! I also heard you haven't seen hide nor hair of your seishi friends."

"Yea I ha- wait, how did you hear that?" Shun'u said, now glaring at his friend.

Koji gave him a fangy grin before grabbing Tasuki's wrist and running towards the train station. "Man, I knew it. Without me, yer lost!"


"Well, if it isn't-"

"TASUKI!!" A male with black hair squealed, tackling the red head. "I can't believe you're here! I missed you!" He said, nuzzling him.

"Nuriko! Hey! It's been awhile!" He said with a smile, hugging his friend. Damn, how good it was to actually feel his friend's flesh. "Hotohori, you too." He said, looking to the brunette. "How did you guys meet up with Koji?"

"Well, I actually ran into Miaka." Koji explained, stretching. "She was excited to see me so she dragged me down to her brother's house and introduced me to everyone's reborn selves. See, Hotohori's real name is Seiji and Nuriko's name is Ryo. Just like yours is Shun'u and mine is Koji. You and me lucked out but, yea."

"Wait." He turned to Seiji then. "Have you guys run into Chichiri yet?"

"No. Actually, with you here, he's the only one missing." The brunette replied.

Shun'u sighed and fell back on the couch, his face buried in his hands then.

"Hey guys. Sorry we're late but Daiki took awhile getting out of work." Came a deep vice, making Shun'u look up. "Mitsukake, Chiriko!" He exclaimed, suddenly happy as he tackled the younger boy.

"Tasuki!" Chiriko said happily, hugging Shun'u back.

Koji grinned. "Guys, meet Shun'u. Shun'u, meet Daiki and Mikio."

Shun'u shook hands with Mikio then and looked at Koji. "So why do we gotta know each other's real names? I'm still same ol' Tasuki and that's how I introduce myself."

"Because those are our given names, we may be the same spirits, but our vessels have different names." Seiji explained, sitting back in the leather recliner.

"I see…so, why're we all gatherin' here?" Shun'u asked, sitting back down, Daiki joining him on his left and Koji sitting on his right.

"I suppose you could say this is the 'Seishi Safe Haven'. We come here when we want to hang out with our fellow seishi or Miaka. Of course, Miaka's brother Keisuke, Yui, and Tetsuya, Yui's boyfriend are welcome here, as well as Kouji. We usually all do something once a week together and today we're going on a picnic." Ryo said, standing as he stretched. "Now we just have to wait for everyone else to get here and we can leave."

Shun'u nodded slightly before looking at Koji. "Were you going to go on this picnic?"

Koji shook his head. "Nah, I gotta go check on my ma." He then looked to Mikio. "How's she doing?"

Mikio smiled at Kouji. "There's no need to worry, she's going to make a full recovery."

Koji nodded before looking at all of them. "Well, now that Genrou's in your capable hands, I gotta go. I'll see ya all later." He said, now beginning to walk out.

"Wait!" Koji paused and looked back at Shun'u. "If you see Chichiri…will you call me?"

Koji grinned. "Don't worry man; I know how badly you must want him right now. I will call you." He held up his cell phone to Shun'u with a nod then and Shun'u smiled, giving him a wave.

When Koji left, everyone turned to Shun'u. "Now, what is this with you and Chichiri?" Ryo said, arching a brow.

Shun'u sweat dropped. This wasn't how he wanted to tell his friends, alone, but, it seemed like he had no other choice. "Well…"

The door opened then, Miaka walking in. "I'm so sorry we're late! I had to remake some of the food an- Tasuki?"

Shun'u grinned at the girl. "Heh, hey there Miaka."


"And now I'm here." Shun'u said, biting into a turkey sandwich with a cheese and mayonnaise.

"That…that's so depressing." Ryo said, hugging Shun'u to his chest. "If you need someone to hold you until you find Chichiri, I-"

"Don't even joke around like that Nuriko." Shun'u interrupted, pushing the male away. "It's so weird being in love...I haven't looked at anyone like that since Chichiri's been mine." He said, staring down at his sandwich as if examining it.

Miaka and Taka looked at each other with a bright smile before turning to Shun'u. "Well, don't worry about it Tasuki! I'm sure you'll find each other again." Miaka said, having eaten all of her given food already. "Not only are you two in love, but you're both Seishi, which means he won't be able to help but find us."

Shun'u nodded softly, still staring at his sandwich. "What if he isn't looking for me though? What if…he's moved on and wants nothing to do with me? I mean, I treated him poorly before he died." Shun'u hung his head then. "He…he probably has someone who can treat him so much better then I could."

Everyone remained silent for a moment before Miaka shook her head. "Well, that's just an obstacle for you to climb over. Taiitsukun herself said you were going to face obstacles in your relationship! I know that Suzaku himself wants you two together. If something does get in your way, then mow it down! It'll make your bond even stronger when you do."

Shun'u looked up at her before smiling. "Miaka, you're the cheesiest person I know. Thanks for that…" The girl smiled back at him before she groaned.

"Is the baby kicking?" Ryo said with a smile, automatically placing his hand to her stomach.

"Heh, yea, it's been real rowdy lately." Taka said, looking at Miaka with a smile.

"Oh! It kicked!" Ryo squealed before leaning forward. "Hey there! This is your Uncle Nuriko! I'm just going to warn you now, your mother's a real pig and your father's a huge klutz!" After getting looks from both Taka and Miaka, he laughed and pat Miaka's belly. "But don't worry, together they make the cutest couple!"

Shun'u rolled his eyes before looking around. "Hey, where did Chiriko go?"

Seiji smiled. "Oh, I gave him some money so he could get some ice cream from the ice cream man at the stands."

"Well, I guess I'm going to join him and get a refill of soda. Anyone want anything?" When no one said anything, Shun'u shrugged and began walking towards the stands. He yawned loudly as he began walking through the playgrounds, ignoring the children playing around him. He hated little kids anyway.

"Uh, excuse me sir."

Shun'u slowed in his walking and glanced back, only to stop completely and turn, staring at the person who had stopped him.

Crouched on the floor in front of him was a blond haired man; not a child like he expected. He picked up a silver bracelet, shaking the sand out of it before the most beautiful pair of maroon colored eyes looked up at him, standing straight and offering the bracelet to Shun'u with the most charming smiled he'd ever seen.

"I believe you dropped this no da."

A/N: Review please! Those inspire me! List of characters will be included next chapter! Hope you enjoyed the first chapter!