Summary: There was always something in the way...

On Buffy.

Enjoy and please review. Mainly cause I asked so nicely.


It was pride that kept you.

(And maybe some fear.)

It was not Angel or Riley or Spike.

(Though it might've been Willow and Xander and Giles.)

It was not because you are a girl.

(Or because she is one, too.)

It was not because she was; is so dangerous.

(You secretly love it.)

It was not because of Allan Finch.

(You remember who it was that pushed him.)

It was not because she betrayed you.

(Even if you tell everyone - and her - it was.)

It was not because she succumbed to evil.

(It could have been you.)

It was not because she tried to take and take until you had nothing.

(She never knew what it meant to receive.)

It was not because she ran.

(That's all she knew how to do.)

It was not because Angel chose her.

(She needed him more than you'd known.)

It was not because she came back.

(Willow had asked.)

It was not because everyone wanted her.

(You still do.)


It is what made you walk out the door.

(The cons of a damaged ego.)

It is what denied her when she reached for you.

(You couldn't face her then.)

It is what forced the three words to Spike.

(You know she heard you.)

It is what slapped her face when she asked a simple question.

(She didn't hit back.)

It is what ignored her for the next few weeks.

(You noted her every move.)

It is what rolled your eyes and agreed to join them at the club.

(It took you hours to pick out the perfect outfit.)

It is what fucked her in a drunken state.

(You wish you can remember, yet you can't.)

It is what told her that it was a big mistake.

(But you remember the look in her eyes.)

It is what ran out her apartment door without looking back.

(You wanted to so bad.)

It is what didn't cry when you saw her packing.

(There was something in your eye later that night.)

It is what stopped you from stopping her.

(She never looked back.)

It is pride that still keeps you.

(And maybe some fear.)