Jump Part II by blackdragonflower

Part II is requested by: Riku-Aura777

Characters belong to Death Note by Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata. Spring Nicht (aka Don't Jump in German) lyrics belong to Tokio Hotel

A/N: This part of Don't Jump is written in Matt's POV and the lyrics are the same as the first chapter only the German version.

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The ground's so far below... everyone so small and insignificant... just like me. The air's cold today... it'll probably snow. Not that I'll really be here to see if I'm right or not, so I guess it doesn't matter a bit.

I take a moment to think. I wonder what Mello's up to... my dear beloved Mells. He's probably too busy, his nose buried in the Kira case to care. As long as Kira exists I am not a priority in Mello's life. I just can't live without him, and I can't live like the way we are. I can't stand to see him walk past me once more and into our room locking himself away to rot. I can't love him like this... I needed a solution... and now I've found one to fit both our needs.

"MAIL!"

Hearing his voice, calling me is like hell. I stare off into the neon lights of the city forcing myself not to look at him. I've made the decision. It'll be better for us both this way. I count the tears that drip down my face icily, one, two, three... I can't see them splatter on the pavement below me, but that's probably for the best in the end.

Über den Dächern,
ist es so kalt,
und so still.
Ich schweig Deinen Namen,
weil Du ihn jetzt,
nicht hören willst.
Der Abgrund der Stadt,
verschlingt jede Träne die fällt.
Da unten ist nichts mehr,
was Dich hier oben noch hält.

I shuffle forwards and turn, my back to the city, my gaze to him. I'm already halfway over the edge. I smile for him, a crooked grin. This will make it all better in the end. Just, trust me this once Mihael. I mouth to him, "I love you Mihael" and took the step I couldn't see. For a moment, that split second I could not find something solid and I began the tumble, I was paralyzed with a striking fear. It soon pooled into a deep silent blue the only thing breaking through was a scream. I replayed the words in my head over and over. Matt... I love you... Don't you dare die on me... I reach up towards the roof I'd just jumped from towards his face longing to touch it once more, regretting my step. He loves me... Oh god I can't die now... My panic shoots through my body in time with a hurt I will never be able to describe. The shock of impact on cold pavement puts me out immediately. My last thoughts, "I can't die now. He still needs me... wants me."

Ich schrei in die Nacht für Dich,
lass mich nicht im Stich,
Spring nicht.
Die Lichter fangen Dich nicht,
sie betrügen Dich.
Spring nicht.
Erinner Dich,
an Dich und mich.
Die Welt da unten zählt nicht,
Bitte spring nicht.

Where am I? It's so dark. In front of me is a child-size figure, cloaked in a shroud of blinding white. All I see of the face is deep purple eyes that reflect the suffering of the world. There is no voice to the being, but it -a she I'm guessing from the size of the pale hand- stops me from walking forward along an invisible path. The scythe tucked in her arm glimmers dangerously though there is no source of light to make it shine like it does. She shakes her head and without words I understand her telling me, "It's not your time. Go back. Go back and live a bit longer. Now is not your time." My feet lead themselves, turning away from her silently and changing the path to a new one. I stumbled towards a warm green light letting it surround me. Little vines twisted from the floor and my eyes widened. In front of me was a forest bleeding green everywhere. The vines on the ground grew up from their soil, a strange white soil much like a bleached sand. When they started snaking their way up my leg I was frightened but calm all at once. They glowed a soft lavender climbing their way up, and I didn't stop them. Is this... life?

I close and reopen my eyes and the world changes and I become aware of a immense pain bearing down on my body and mind. A groan escapes, I want the peace back... When I saw Mello sitting beside my bed I lost my breath. There was no way he could still want me... but I cringe waiting for something, anything to pass through his lips angrily. I blink when he clucks his tongue and rubs my cheek affectionately. His voice is hard but I can tell he is definitely trying to smoothen out the rough edges. "Mattie... I'm so sorry for how I've been treating you... Please just tell me and don't jump..." There was a pain then, so much more strong than the physical. It was choking, and hot tears blistered. Mihael never said please to anyone, never has.

I want to start over again from the beginning, before there was Kira. I want to walk the path with him, side by side, no deranged mass murderer in the way to stop us.

In Deinen Augen,
scheint alles sinnlos und leer.
Der Schnee fällt einsam,
Du spürst ihn schon lange nicht mehr.
Irgendwo da draussen,
bist Du verloren gegangen.
Du träumst von dem Ende,
um nochmal von vorn anzufangen.

I can barely feel him holding my hand but I concentrate on it. He was here by my side; it makes me wonder how long he's stayed. I don't want to loose him. I just want him by my side. I can't take it anymore, holding the tears in, so I let them go. Letting the tears go hurts, but holding the things in hurts more. Gently he pulls off his leather glove and wipes them away. "Now... don't cry Mattie..." Needing to feel his arms around me I reach for him shaking as I do so. I am still weak after all. I don't care about the IVs attached to me, I want to hug him now... Mello's arms closed around me and I finally let the tears cascade in full waves, crying my heart dry.

He didn't interrupt me, say how childish crying was, or let me go, just remained quiet and let me do my business. His grip is so comforting, I've missed it dearly. Finally the river of tears begin to recede and I sniffled out, "I'm sorry Mel-Mel."

He gives me a look. "Don't go apologizing. I don't want to hear it. Understand?"

I nodded slowly letting him go. I was in so much pain. He helped me lay back down and fluffed my pillow, tucking the sheets and blanket around me afterwards. "Mells?"

"Yeah Matt?"

I dread asking this question but I have to. I have to know the answer, but my voice is weak and barely able to speak it aloud, "Why are you here? What about the Kira case?"

I winced a little when he growled. "You scared the hell out of me Mail... You made me feel like a woman..." I couldn't help but chuckle, Mello a girl? It was pretty funny but my mind lingered on the question I'd asked. He hadn't answered me.

"And the Kira case?"

He brushes the hair from his face, tucking a strand behind his ear and saying nonchalantly, "I had more important matters to attend to."

I stared at him, not able to believe the words, but finding so much love in them behind the tough tone. My hand tightens around his of its own accord and the urge to kiss him flares. My body wants to cry again, but I don't want to. Placing my trembling hand against his cheek I drew his face close to mine before murmuring quietly, "I'm really sorry Mihael... Thank you... Thanks for... holding my hand..." Then I pressed my lips to his letting my tongue wander to brush against his mouth, hoping he'd let me come in, wishing desperately for it. I was surprised he didn't pull away, but let me inside. After all, public displays of affection were not his thing. And even if someone wasn't in the room, they could so easily walk in... and knowing these crazy places there were probably some hidden cameras.

Gently he tangles his fingers into my red hair massaging my scalp. I groan softly. I hope he forgives me for doing that... for jumping off the edge. I'll never do it again. It's not worth it... the pain... and I know even if I'd happened to go to heaven or wherever it is... I'd never be happy unless Mihael was by my side.

Ich weiss nicht wie lang,
Ich Dich halten kann.
Ich weiss nicht wie lang.

Nimm meine Hand,
wir fangen nochmal an.
Spring nicht.

One week. I've been home for one week. Things are the same as they use to be for the most part. Only little things have changed, but they make me so much happier. I've gotten yelled at once or twice, but I could only grin widely and try not to laugh. You never realize how much you miss things like that until they're gone and you don't have them anymore. The game controller vibrates in my hand a part of me, like a heartbeat. I haven't set the thing down for hours. Mello's doing something on his laptop, for the Kira case. I've realized that I can't stop him from pursuing Kira, so we compromised. And that is my little secret. I don't think he knows that I sneak little glances his way while I'm playing. The only people playing online tonight are noobs anyways, so they don't require as much attention. Me and the two or three other vets. are whooping their butts real good. I've only died once or twice, but those kids just got lucky shots.

The game's starting to get old though. You can only destroy and crush noobs for so long... I tense feeling Mello's head drop onto my shoulder. I hadn't noticed he'd gotten up, I think too much. I grinned wide deciding to be a bit of a tease, for fun ya know? "Are you falling asleep Mells?"

He groans. Despite his trying not to act tired, I can tell he is. He can't fool me. I guess he sensed this because he retorted back with, "I've had a long day... I can fall asleep if I want to."

I chuckled loving his attitude, "That so? Hm, sounds like somebody needs a nap, grouchy..." I poked him in the side.

He growled at me, moving his head so his glare very convincingly. I was surprised at what he did say next. "Why don't you just shut up and kiss me then twit." Seriously where did that come from? But this kind of thing is what I love the most about Mells. I licked my lips.

"Mm..." I leaned closer to him, after putting the controller aside, and wrapped my arms around his waist. He was so cute right now. "Sounds like a very hot situation... Trouble is... should I go in unarmed...?"

My blondie smirks. It looks like he's got something diabolical fluttering up there in his mind. "Idiot... you're never unarmed." I was excited when his mouth encased mine. He hadn't let me kiss him like this in awhile because he said it'd 'mess me up in my condition'. Grabbing his neck I pull him closer, and let my other hand wander his body. Breaking away from his lips I bit at his neck playfully, enjoying myself thoroughly.

He hissed and pressed me down into the couch, straddling my waist, and keeping my hands confined so they couldn't create mischief. But the look on Mello's face is too much. I break down laughing my butt off just wanting to kiss him all over and huggle him tight. Soon he joins me, for a reason unknown, which only makes me laugh more. I know, as I've always known but chose to ignore, that Mihael Keehl has loved me. He always has, always will. And I promise him I'll never jump again.

Ich schrei in die Nacht für Dich,
lass mich nicht im Stich
Spring nicht.
Die Lichter fangen Dich nicht,
sie betrügen Dich.
Spring nicht.
Erinner Dich,
an Dich und mich.
Die Welt da unten zählt nicht,
Bitte spring nicht.

Spring nicht.
Und halt Dich das auch nicht zurück.
Dann spring ich für Dich.

-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

Oh my. This was a lot of fun to write. Once I started going I just couldn't stop! This is Matt's side of Jump, so the story was a lot the same, but I hope it was different enough for everyone that it was worth the effort of reading it. Riku-Aura777 wanted to know what Matt must have been thinking while he was doing the deed and the further reasonings behind it. I hope I've answered that well enough for everyone. :)

Also, I chose the German lyrics of the song for part two because I thought it would help change it up and yet keep it the same. It was for fun... I'm sorry if it messed anyone up. :chuckles: As I said at the beginning of part two, the lyrics are in the same places and are exactly what they are in part one.


Thanks so much for reading this fic! Hope you all enjoyed part two!

blackdragonflower