Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or any of its affiliated characters.
A/N: Reviews are greatly appreciated! This one shot is rated T for artistically graphic images, cutting, and a character suicide. You have been warned!
Synopsis: What if Mamoru broke up with Usagi for the final time, thus ending their relationship forever? How would she react? A dramatized one shot poem exploring the extremes to which Usagi could go. Warning: involves cutting and character suicide.
Crimson and Ebony
Crimson jewels, glittering like little red stars upon my wrist.
Beautiful designs, twirling and circling into shapes of art.
Part of me recoils, screams...
This is not me! What are you doing? the rational thoughts plead.
But the irrational side of my brain, the one fascinated at the sight of my own blood, wins out-
The pain, the release- oh, to feel something other than emotional agony...
I can't take it any more.
I hate you.
But I love you. That's why it hurts so much. How can I feel such confliction; how can I hate you and love you at the same time? It makes no logical sense.
Crimson: spilling over, tainting the white bedroom floor.
Struggling to break free from a raw throat, already sore from prolonged grief.
Look what you do to me.
Crimson, crimson, crimson: it's everywhere.
It's my hands.
It's my arms.
It's a pool, at my feet.
Mama will have to clean that. Poor Mama.
Strange how the mind wanders, even on the brink of death.
A last slash.
Fluttering eyelids, a last goodbye.
More bloody tears, intermingling with pure ones-
The last piece of innocence I have left.
Because you took it all, Mamo-ch... Mamoru.
It seems I've lost the battle of the tears as well.
My last battle on this earth, other than the unconscious one my body fights to stay alive, and I've lost again.
My spirit is not fighting this time, though.
I'm ready to go.
Too much pain than one human can bear in one already tragic life.
Broken heart, heavy.
There are too many burdens in this world.
Darkness caresses my mind,
But it only serves to remind me of him.
Black like night,
Black like him.
Ebony hair and an ebony cloak.
Red dots, dancing seductively across the abyss behind my lids.
Reminds me of
Meaningless red roses,
And red eyes that could have been.
Red like my pain,
Red like my blood.
You kidnapped my heart and my dreams,
And never returned them whole like you promised.
Pittering baby feet of a daughter: I shall never hear,
Honey-silkened laughter of a husband: I shall never savor.
A sickening weakness now,
An increase of darkness now.
The petals have all fallen,
My time is up.
Goodbye, my sweet savior,
I tell the chiseled countenance
I've memorized long ago.
I'm sorry it didn't work out. I'm sorry I couldn't be the Princess you wanted.
One last time, smiling,
Your beautiful face,
Before I go to sleep.
A/N: Gosh, that was just so angsty! But I live for angst and drama in fiction! This was really hard to write; I'm not the type of person who thinks this way and I really had to dig into extreme character emotion to get this right. Now I know Usagi obviously wouldn't have reacted that way, and Mamoru would never break up with her, but I was just treading the waters of "what if" here. Hope you all enjoyed it and please review!