Impossible to Love You
Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to the brilliant Masashi Kishimoto-sama. I am not Masashi Kishimoto-sama.
Warnings: Uchihacest, M/M.
A/N: My first attempt at A/U, specially written for Itachi. I am deeply sorry for hating him now. So this is dedicated to him! Haha. And please do read Drowning in Denial as well! I've put a lot of effort in that! Thanks! And please R&R for this story too! I would dearly appreciate constructive criticisms! Thank you!
Japanese to English: Otouto (Younger brother); Otou-san ('Father' in very polite and respectful form); Kaa-san ('Mother' in slightly more colloquial but still respectful form); Nii-san (Older brother); Onigiri (a snack of Japanese rice formed into triangle or oval shapes and often wrapped in nori (edible seaweed), with or without fillings); Bento (home-packed meal common in Japanese cuisine); Furoshiki (traditional Japanese wrapping cloth now commonly used to wrap and transport bento and often double as a table mat for the lunch) -- Bet all of you know, but it's a kind of formalities thing for me. Heh.
It had been two months, two whole months after his university entrance exams. Sasuke brooded darkly in front of his computer, before switching off the bright stinging screen that seemed to tire his eyes all too often now from over half a day's usage daily. He sighed deeply, rubbing his dark eyes lined with fatigue, feeling disgusted. Yet another day wasted.
The novelty of having nothing to do after the gruelling days of preparing for his entrance exams proved to be terribly wearing instead. Sasuke toyed with the idea of his father's proposal for him to work in his school for a moment, but shuddered at the thought of having to work with his cold brother, and being compared to him again by others. He sighed once again, rubbing his temples to sooth the slight headache that was beginning.
"Otouto." A deep and deceptively gentle voice shook him out of his pensive thoughts.
He spun his chair around, folding his arms together automatically the moment he set his eyes at the figure by the door, narrowing his onyx orbs into the equally black starless night sky that bore back unflinchingly into his.
The eye war waged for a long second, before Sasuke finally tore his glare away from the tall, lean figure, focusing his eyes on the dark blue comforter before him instead, neatly tucked into the soft, wide bed.
"Why didn't you knock first?" Sasuke demanded crossly.
"Now, now, my foolish little brother, don't be so rude to your poor hardworking aniki who had just returned from work whilst you laze around in the soft comfort of our house." Itachi drawled, smirking.
"Hn. It was a much deserved rest." Sasuke muttered sotto voce.
"Anyway, I just came up to call you down for dinner." Itachi went on smoothly, before turning onto his heels and heading out of the room. Sasuke glared at the disappearing figure before trudging after him.
Dinner went on for about fifteen minutes undisturbed until Sasuke's father broke the silence. "It's about time you consider my proposal, Sasuke." Sasuke paused, his chopsticks in the midst of grabbing a salmon slice.
"I want to find work myself, otou-san."
His father glared at him. "How many times have I told you that I expect you to work in the administrative office so that you can learn the ropes and assist your brother in running the school?"
Sasuke pursed his lips into a thin line, holding back his retort, glaring down into his bowl sullenly.
"Stop sulking. You have already rested for two months. I expect you to start work this coming Monday. Itachi, you heard me." Their father barked.
"Yes otou-san I will make the necessary preparations." Itachi answered politely.
The rest of the dinner was finished in an uneasy silence that hung over the dining table like a storm cloud. Sasuke stomped up the stairs to his room, slamming the door shut before flinging himself onto the bed. A soft knock on the door shook him out of his depressed thoughts.
"Who is it?" Sasuke said harshly.
"Kaa-san, dear. Can I come in?" His mother's sweet voice drifted to him through the wooden door that separated them. He didn't reply. The door creaked open softly, and his mother slipped into the room, moving over to sit on the edge of the bed. She ruffled his raven tresses lovingly.
"You know, otou-san has great plans for you in the future, that's why he insists that you work in the school." She cooed, caressing his head fondly.
"But I don't want to be spoon-fed! I want to strike it out on my own… nii-san didn't have to work in otousan's school after his A-levels, and now he could still be the principal! Why must I listen to otou-san?" Sasuke hissed into the pillow.
"Darling, let me tell you a secret. Your father did all this for you because he truly wants you to take over his place in the school. Itachi has always been too… distant for us to trust the school to him, which your father so painstakingly built with his own hands." His mother whispered in a wistful tone into his ear.
Sasuke looked up at her then, in slight amazement. He had never thought that his father thought of Itachi in that way. Every time, everyone seemed to think of Itachi as the prodigy who would inherit the business and open more branches, and he had always been bitter about the fact that he had to remain as Itachi's shadow. He blinked at his mother, who smiled at him kindly, her dark eyes warm and soft. She patted his head and left the room. Sasuke sat up on the bed, pondering about this little piece of revelation his mother had broke to him.
"Foolish little brother. Stop kicking up a fuss over nothing. You have to be in school by 8am on Monday. Your work would end at 5pm." Itachi said curtly, leaning against the door frame.
"What am I working as?" Sasuke asked, scowling at the stoic face of his older brother, wanting to punch the bastard who had so rudely interrupted his occupied thoughts.
"Receptionist. I don't see how you can handle it though. It requires socializing skills." Itachi replied, smiling slightly at Sasuke. Sasuke's scowl turned darker as he threw his pillow at the empty spot Itachi had previously occupied.
"Sasuke, Sasuke, wake up! It's your first day of sch— no, work today!" A distant, motherly voice penetrated into his dreams, pulling him away from the lures of sleep. He cracked open a bleary eyelid, and groaned.
"Rise and shine, dear!" His mother greeted him in a sing-song lilt, as a blinding light filled the room. He frowned and grabbed his pillow to shield his eyes from the unwelcome light.
"Don't switch on the lights." He grumbled to his pillow.
"Now, now don't be grumpy. You wouldn't want to be late on your very first day of work would you?
Sasuke groaned and slowly sat up. "Yes kaa-san." He muttered grouchily. His mother clicked her tongue, her hands on her hips, before leaving the room.
"Where's nii-san?" Sasuke asked the moment he got down.
"Oh he's off to work already. It's his early shift today. He told me to tell you to report in his office first today. My my aren't you looking sprightly today! My handsome child!"
Sasuke frowned down at his clothes. Itachi had told him that there was no need to dress too formally so he merely wore a pair of dark jeans and black T-shirt, with his usual assortment of black and chain bangles.
"Black really makes your fair skin stand out." His mother commented, her warm brown eyes reflecting specks of gold from the morning sun's bright rays. Sasuke's scowl grew even deeper at that comment.
He had tried so desperately, umpteenth times, to tan himself, but he remained snow-pale, which made him appear weak and almost effeminate. His mother's unwitting compliment cut him to the quick. Also, though Itach wasn't tanned a lovely golden-brown, he was still tanner than Sasuke. Sasuke almost snarled at the notion. Even in the case of tanning Itachi had to win him.
He quickly finished his onigiri and grabbed his bento wrapped in furoshiki, whilst gulping down his steaming tea whole, saying shortly, "I'm off, kaa-san."
Hurrying towards the door he heard a fading sweet voice trailing after him, "Be careful when you cross the road, honey!" and felt a twinge of regret tugging at his sleeve at the way he had treated his mother just because of an unwitting remark she made, and yet she was still as gently and caring towards him, nonetheless.
He entered the iron-wrought gates of the fresh white pillars of Kono-Uchiha School of Music, looking appreciatively at the intricate design of his family's reputable emblem at the top of the heavy iron gates. The two security guards bowed down deeply to him, and he gave a brief nod as he strode past them leisurely. He walked down the sheltered path leading to the general office. The moment he entered, he noted all of the slight eye movement that flickered towards him, before returning to their respective work. Sasuke knew then, that these people must have been informed of his arrival, and was unduly satisfied that he didn't need to go through a dull ritual of introducing himself.
A pair of girlish giggles broke into his mind stream, and he looked up to see the cause of the disruption. Two girls approximately his age were sitting at the reception corner, staring at him with a slight blush that settled over their rouged cheeks, making them appear rather like a pair of red tomatoes. He frowned at them, knowing exactly what images their minds were conjuring. He had had enough of this in his school days. He ignored them and proceeded on towards the principal's office.
He had recognised this place, too well. Being the son of the creator of this school, it was inevitable he had to attend classes in this school. He remembered the principal from his days, a kindly old man named Sarutobi. He passed away just a few years after Sasuke's entry though, and was replaced by a middle-aged woman, who did not look at all her age, and hated Sasuke with his truancy-playing. Sasuke's frown creased deeper. He was always summoned to the office. He rapped smartly at the familiar oak door.
"Come in." The cool, composed voice belonging to his brother sounded through. Sasuke opened the door and entered.
"So otouto, you're finally here. I'll call the administrative manager over now." Itachi said in a bland tone after sparing Sasuke with the slightest glance. He picked up the shiny black phone and dialled the line.
"My brother has arrived. Yes. Could you come over to my office now to brief him over about his duties?"
Itachi set down the phone, and continued poring over the documents on his desk, with a small pair of silver rimmed glasses set over his angular face, framing his feline eyes. Sasuke scowled at the lack of reception. His brother had at least attempted to pay some attention to him when he was younger, though he often flicked his forehead in an irritating way. Now Sasuke could have dissipated into thin air in the very room and Itachi wouldn't even notice, much less miss him.
A swift knock shook Sasuke out of his pensiveness.
Sasuke swivelled his head to stare at a pair of strangely golden eyes boring into him. The odd eyes were lined with purple eyeliner with stood out in the striking paper-white skin of the man. Sasuke cringed at the sight, finding it incredible that someone could actually by paler than him, and, the eyeliner.
The pale gaunt face was adorned by a thick head of long sleek black hair which the man had pulled back to assume a tidy look, not unlike Itachi's, except that this man's hair was significantly longer, and gleamed like satin. Sasuke knew then, this man must be, no, he was blatantly a gay.
The man's wide mouth curved into a creepy smile, a bizzare glint springing into his eyes as he surveyed Sasuke, seemingly undressing him with his very eyes. Sasuke shot the man a dark glare, which did not seem to affect him. In fact, his smile grew, if possible, even more sinister. Sasuke gave up and tore his eyes off the weird male, directing his gaze at Itachi instead. Itachi was staring at the strange man as well, his face as expressionless as before, but it was the eyes which chilled Sasuke to the bone.
He had never seen his brother's eyes look so black and wild before. His eyes raged like a hurricane storm over the night seas, flashing with lightning. Sasuke couldn't imagine, for the life of him, what Itachi was so furious with this man about. He looked as if he could kill.
"Hello, I am Orochimaru, the administrative manager. You must be Uchiha Sasuke, the principal's very own little brother. It's my pleasure to meet you." A slick, oily false voice broke into Sasuke's thoughts.
He shifted his gaze back to the creepy man. "Hi. Nice to meet you too." He said offhandedly.
Orochimaru saunter towards him, holding out his pallid hand. Sasuke stared at it doubtfully, before shaking it. The distasteful bony fingers curled around his, icy cold to the touch. He quickly snatched his hand away and turned towards Itachi again.
"Orochimaru-san here will be in charge of your duties, Sasuke. So if you have any questions, just report it to him. Basically as the receptionist, all you have to do is to answer calls, and maybe just try to appease some particularly demanding parents. The school schedule is just outside at the reception desk. Mostly, you'd just receive calls regarding the school schedule, and if you receive any calls for the teachers, check their schedule before passing the line to them. If the call's for me, first check who the person is. Usually, I'd tell you if I'm expecting any calls, so just pass the line to the vice principal instead." Itachi droned.
"Ok." Sasuke replied curtly.
"You may be excused then. Orochimaru-san, I still have something to speak to you about."
Sasuke turned and left the office, trotting down to the reception desk.
"Hi! We heard you're the principal's brother! Your name's Sasuke isn't it? My name's Haruno Sakura and she's Yamanaka Ino! Nice to meet you! The pink-haired girl chirped brightly. Sasuke merely grunted, and sank down on the chair beside them. Sakura wilted a little, and Ino immediately took up the challenge, sliding a dark smoky blue gaze towards him, tilting her chest forward to expose her cleavage.
"You've got a very sexy scowl, Sasuke-kun. Forgive that High Forehead over there. She always behaves like a high school girl upon meeting someone hot. And you're burning." She winked at him.
Sakura fumed. "I heard you! You stupid Ino-pig! That's a lame pickup line!"
Sasuke glared at the two arguing girls, propping his elbows on the desk. He didn't know how he was going to survive the rest of his days at work. Eventually some phone calls arrived and they finally got busy.
The two girls were often sent on errands, much to his relief. He surmised the reason he needn't do any errands was due to the fact his father owned the school. He hated the feeling of being special due to someone else's credit. He wanted to carve something out for himself, but here he was, stuck in the office, looking at the glass doors just right in front of him with longing. A sudden ring from the phone cut short his musing, and he put out an arm to reach for it.
"Good afternoon Kono-Uchiha School of Music."
"You're looking for the vice-principal? Hold on." He left the receiver to check the vice-principal's office, only to see she wasn't in. He returned to the caller.
"She isn't in at the moment."
"Ok, I'll get her to return your call."
He hung up the phone, and rested his back on the chair, about to close his wan eyes when a sudden cough disrupted him from his respite. He sat upright and looked at the person who got his attention.
"Yes?" He asked hesitantly.
Orochimaru slid down on a chair beside him, shifting nearer as he did so, so that his chair bumped slightly with Sasuke's.
"Sasuke-kun, you know, you just got to work, and probably don't know about the real world much out there. People can eat you up if you're not the least bit careful— or in this context, polite. It isn't really appropriate to just say a mere 'hold on'. Do add a please at the end, my boy."
Orochimaru smiled at Sasuke, his queer steel blue earrings shining where the mechanical lights above caught. Sasuke stared down at the palm that caressed Sasuke's covered thigh tenderly, sliding up and down when he spoke leisurely. Sasuke glared at Orochimaru, slapping his hand on top of Orochimaru's to stop him, speaking gruffly, "Yes, I understand perfectly Orochimaru-san."
Orochimaru's smile simply broadened as he placed another cold hand over Sasuke's hand, caressing it almost fondly.
"Oh and, always say welcome to the people on the receiving end of the phone. Remember that politeness is the key, Sasuke-kun."
His knee brushed against Sasuke's as he continued rubbing his icy thumb around Sasuke's fingers. Sasuke had never felt more like killing than at that moment. This man was too much. He had stepped way past Sasuke's personal space.
The two of them turned at hearing a stern voice at the back. A pair of jet black eyes similar to Sasuke's bore holes at them. Sasuke flinched and pulled his hand away from Orochimaru's immediately, inwardly glad for his brother's interruption.
"Sasuke." Itachi repeated, his eyes ice cold shards of the inky winter night.
"I need to discuss with you something in my office right now." His voice turned dangerously low.
"Alright. Excuse me, Orochimaru-san." Sasuke spat at the snake-like man, though he shuddered inwardly at Itachi's sternness.
"I hope you do realise that this is a school. People are expected to conduct themselves properly. This is not a bar. Stop your flirting." Itachi commanded the moment the door closed shut.
"What do you mean by that? Isn't it obvious that it was that man outside who's hitting on me? And I'm not gay." Sasuke huffed angrily at the accusations.
"Are you sure you're not? Because you seem to be very close to your best friend." Itachi said calmly, reclining on his seat.
"I'm not! And Naruto's straight as well! What the hell is wrong with you? I was going to thank you from saving me from the sick ass outside but it looks like I'm going to save my thanks." Sasuke folded his arms, glaring hard at Itachi.
"Why were you so worked up over my saying that you're gay? Are you homophobic?" Itachi pressed on.
"I'm neither! What's with you? You're straying away from your main point by the way." Sasuke pointed out.
"Stop rebuking me. I will not have any of your nonsense here. You may be able to throw your weight around at home, but remember that this is my domain." Itachi ordered, ignoring Sasuke's words.
"The reason why you're the principal was because of otou-san anyway! Stop lording over me! And what happened outside wasn't even my fault!" Sasuke yelled, losing his cool.
Itachi stood up and walked towards Sasuke, his cold eyes roaming over Sasuke.
"I am still the principal, no matter what. You're under me. You have to listen to me. And you have no idea what you're capable of." Itachi's voice darkened at the last sentence, his dark stone orbs trained on Sasuke's face.
Sasuke's fists clenched and unclenched. He turned and stormed off from the office, slamming the door shut behind him.
"That asshole. If we were at home I'd have attacked him by now. What did he mean by me not having any idea what I'm capable of anyway?" Sasuke pondered out loud amidst his dark muttered curses.