Interview: Okay, seriously, Beyond the Flame, chapter 95, was beyond badass. It was so amazing that all the characters were in high demand, and I couldn't get them together for the interview soon enough.
Ed: You're just lying so you don't seem disorganized, like you always are.
Interview: Honestly, anyone who watches any of my stories should know how irregular I've become since Chem took over my life.
Interview: (ignores) I dragged the characters here, refusing their refusals to come.
Ed: You refused their refusals?
Interview: Stop distracting me! You're making this take longer than it should!
Ed: I'm just stalling. I don't want to be here, and you drag me back every month…
Interview: You have my persmission to shit talk Roy for the first few minutes of the interview, so don't complain.
Ed: When have I ever not talking shit about him on your account?
Interview: (ignores -get used to it-)ANYWAY, I have Ed, Riza, Roy, Scar, Olivia, and Izumi with me today. Let's start with Ed. I'd like to know what you were thinking-
Ed: That the Colonel's a dumbass, as usual-
Interview: When Envy commited suicide.
Ed: (pauses) Um…well, I was still thinking that in the back of my head, but otherwise, I wasn't too surprised, and I was relieved. I know the Lieutenant would have taken care of him if this hadn't happened, but he really deserved a pitiful death like that.
Interview: You and Envy had an interesting relationship.
Ed: (mumbles) …That's one way of putting it…
Interview: How did you resist the shrimp jokes?
Ed: The Colonel's big mouth was distracting me.
Interview: How did you resist strangling him when he called you a shrimp? Was that some maturity there?
Ed: Once again, I was distracted by someone's big, fat trap-
Roy: Watch it, Fullmetal.
Interview: Sorry, Roy. I gave him permission.
Ed: Like it makes a difference.
Roy: Aw, I thought you were on my side…
Interview: I am. I loved this chapter-
Olivia: This is an interview, not a review. Get to the point. I'm kind of busy, you know.
Interview: Yeah, I noticed. So is Alex. He was badass last chapter (though who wasn't?), especially when he got his arm relocated. You said he could survive some 'love taps' in his defense, though before you said he was a weak coward. Do you respect him more now?
Olivia: I'll never look at him differently for the Isbalan war, no matter what he does or says. He did well this time, though…
Interview: I don't know if she means it, or if she's just saying it. (sighs) Anyhow, Roy. You were pretty psycho last chapter.
Roy: (sigh) So I've noticed.
Ed: Took you long enough…
Roy: I'm still not afraid to burn your arm off-
Interview: This is a violence free area, guys! (mumbles) you can fight as much as you want when I'm not around…
Ed: Great, I might hold you to that.
Interview: We all miss Hughes very much and we all loved seeing Envy get his ass kicked while it lasted, but I think that Riza…um, and those other people, I guess…snapped you out of it just in time.
Riza: I can't be given the credit for it. The Colonel was the one who stopped his rampage.
Interview: Yeah, whatever. No matter what you two say, or how much you deny it, that was the most delicious chapter since 39.
Ed: How do you remember with that kind of accuracy?
Interview: I'm obsessed, remember? Come on, Ed, you should know this by now.
Ed: Someone get me out of here…
Interview: So, Riza, when you said you were going to kill your body, were you referring to the tattoo on your back for sure?
Riza: I was. I wouldn't want there to be any chance of another Flame Alchemist.
Interview: I don't get that, since Roy already fried your back, but sure. And once again, you can't deny that it was something more than that that made you so desperate to make him stop.
Ed: You sure like to blow things out of proportion.
Interview: ANYWAY, Scar. I feel like all you did was add in some random crap to make it more dramatic.
Scar: It was the same thing my master told me. I was repeating the advice I failed to follow, hoping to save another from my fate.
Interview: Damn, that is deep. Izumi, you're working with the military. What is this?
Izumi: I'm not too happy with the arrangement, but I'll do what I have to. Perhaps after this Ed will finally leave the military and I can get them out of my life completely.
Interview: You mean after they get their bodies back? I guess we all still have hope in that. I think Al will get his, at least. Anyhow, that's all the time we have for today! Thanks for reading the interview, and see you again for chapter 96!