it's official. i'm a RAVING XigDem addict. anyways, this stared as a comic and wound up as a fanfic, but i think it's okay nontheless. enjoy! i have to go to rehab...

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom hearts, "Much Ado About Nothing," Sherlock Holmes, Casanova,"Bohemian Rhapsody," or anyhitng else of such nature that may appear in this fanfic. i am making no profit off of this.

though/ "titles"

regular dialouge

qoutes from "Much Ado About Nothing"


C'mon, c'mon! HurryuphurryuphurryuphurryUP-PUH!! Demyx impatiently tapped his foot staring at the ominous hunk of cogs his teacher called a clock. Every "tick" seemed to last and hour in itself. 2:56… just four more minutes…

The sandy blonde threw his head back and groaned. His patience was wearing thin, but there was a perfectly good reason- today was his birthday. Well, it wasn't so much the actual change in age as it was the gift he was getting. No, he wasn't being greedy, or at least he wasn't trying to be- the desire for knowledge and answers wasn't exactly frowned upon, was it? The thing that he craved this most this year was the answer to a burning question- a question that had surfaced exactly eight days ago…


Believe it or not, Demyx was a hopeless romantic. His mp3 player held a large amount of soul and R&B, and he was often found reading one of those dime store paperback novels or watching Much Ado About Nothing for the umpteenth time. So one can only imagine his reaction when he opened the door after a grueling day at school on to find his mother with an absolutely perfect red rose with a small card attached to it, saying "This came for you."

He spent the rest of the night trying to figure out his admirer. He read the card a thousandth time: "I do much wonder that one man seeing how much another man is a fool when he dedicates his behaviors to love, will, after he hath laughed at shallow follies in others, become the argument of his own scorn by falling in love."

He nearly swooned. Okay, this narrowed it down to someone who knew him really well- and this someone had gone through the labor of interpreting Shakespeare to seduce him.

Well, then again, all his friends had seen Much Ado About Nothing- either they were in his theatere arts class, or he had forced them.

But the quote- it was about someone who was mocking themselves about falling in love after they had made fun of other's love-sick actions. Surely, the gesture of the rose it perfectly (he didn't know many people who favored cash expenditure over a lame pick-up line to try to win someone's affection). Whoever was doing this must have really thought he was worth it.

That or they remembered that it was his favorite quote from the movie.

He flopped on his bed, pulling his pillow farther onto his head- maybe he was reading too much into this. But oh, GOD did he enjoy the feeling of fantasy and butterflies soaring viciously around in his stomach and dizzying his brain.

This was all on Friday. He had continued to receive roses starting that Monday- each card with a little quote or quirk that would make him giggle and then proceed to throw him into "Sherlock Holmes Mode." He made mention of his plight the following Wednesday.

"Does ANYBODY have ANY idea who it could be?"He asked in a pleading tone.

Everyone shook their heads and he was met with a chorus of "No's," "Nuh-uh's," and "Sorry kid's." Marluxia worked for his grandmother's flower shop which also happened to be the shop that was supplying the roses for the seducer. "Whoever they are, my grandmother and I appreciate the business!" he said slyly. He knew Marluxia knew, but after many failed attempts Demyx discovered that this was one nut that just wouldn't crack.

This was seriously PISSING HIM OFF!! He knew it had to be somebody who knew him well, because half of the stuff on the cards were inside jokes. Then again, it could be a stalker. Or maybe it was just someone who overheard them. Wait, did that qualify as a stalker? What if it was all a prank and he had made the wrong assumption? He pulled at his gelled hair and moaned. Why was this so HARD? He resigned to throwing his head against the wall, closing his eyes and losing himself in thought. Whoever they were, they were good. Really good. His brain was still buzzing so much so he didn't register the morning bell.

"Hey, kid…" the tip of a ratty converse was knocked softly into Demyx's thigh repeatedly. "Yoo-hoo! Dem!" Demyx groaned and opened his eyes to a face that held an eye patch, a long scar up the left cheek, and a mischievous smile to top it all off.

"Hey Captain Xigbar, how's the S.S. Depth Perception?" He snorted.

Xigbar gave a half-hearted snicker and rolled his remaining eye. "Start coming up with better comebacks or I'll make you walk the plank." He tapped the blonde's thigh again.

"Yeah, well, I'm not so witty when my brain's fried"

"I noticed. This thing's got you really eaten up, hasn't it?"

"Yeah. I appreciate the gesture, but it's driving me crazy!"

"Maybe that's what they wanted," Xigbar said.

"…How so?"

"Maybe you drove whoever this is crazy. Maybe they're just returning the favor."

"Oh, and here I am assuming it was an act of romance when it's really a vendetta?"

"No, no-I'm pretty sure it's out of romance. Generally sending roses isn't the greatest revenge. You oughtta be proud of yourself for making somebody go all-out like this."

"'Was an experienced gold digger before the first date'- that'll look great on a resume." Demyx chuckled, fanning his arm in front of himself as if to display the words. "'Motivates others well, demonstrates innate skills and talents.'" Xigbar joined him in laughter.

"I see your brain's back already. But, we've got to waste it on algebra right now. C'mon." He offered a hand to the blonde. As much as he wanted to just sit there and joke around, he couldn't risk angering the math goddess of first period. "I can't afford a detention today- I've got plans."


The previous day's note was the shortest (and the bluntest), but it thrilled Demyx the most by far: "You already know me, but I'll tell you who I am tomorrow anyways."

Demyx closed his eyes and sighed- he could see it as clearly as if he were holding it. He could feel the texture of the stiff paper between his fingers. The ideas of actually knowing just who this Casanova was made his heart beat quicken. He slowly opened his eyes…

2:58.

"DAMMIT!"

He flung his pencil against his desk. The tube of plastic ricocheted off of the desktop with a barely audible "ping!" and hit the leg of the occupant of the desk adjacent.

"Hey, whoa!" whispered said occupant. Fire truck red spikes swished with the sharp head movement of the owner. "Geez birthday boy, chill!"

"But Axeeeeeeel… two more MINUTES… it's KILLING ME!" the blonde stamped his feet angrily. "I wanna KNOW!!"

"How the hell are you and Roxas not related?" the red-head muttered. He let a moment of lusty fantasy flash across his mind at the mention of the Roxas' name before snapping back to reality and the conversation. "Look, I'm just as eager to get out of here as you are, but I'd like to do it without any injuries."

"Whatever…" Demyx groaned, laying his head on his desk, blowing a few loose strands of hair out of his face. The growing sounds of mindless gossip chatter along with paper crumpling, back packs being zipped and binders clacking shut masked the sounds of the minute hand slowly dragging by. His eyes trailed down to the doodles he watch sketching earlier: a dog eating a hamster, some random musical notes, a random beach scene, and a stick-figure Captain Xigbar at the helm of the S.S. Depth Perception, complete with parrot and saber. He giggled before pulling out another pencil and adding himself being thrown overboard into shark infested waters. Continuing to reminisce about Wednesday morning's conversation, he drew a drunken Luxord as first mate, Marluxia in the crow's nest, and Larxene as a rabid mermaid who was just as enticed about eating Demyx as the sharks were. As busied himself with doodling everyone else in their proper place, he didn't notice Axel lean over and stare until he spoke. "Hey, you forgot me- and Roxas!"

Demyx (after getting over the initial shock) snorted. "Oh you're there. You're just in the cabin."

"The cabin? Why?"

"Because…" Demyx trailed off smiling smugly.

Axel paused for a moment before swatting the blonde with his notebook. "You bastard…"

Demyx only laughed at Axel's disgruntled expression and growing blush. He continued adding to his pirate mash-up (including disjointed dialogue and hearts floating out of the cabin) until at long last- that glorious A# vibrato reached his ears.

"YES!" he hissed, throwing all his stuff in every possible space of his back pack. "See ya Axel, have fun with Roxas at the tonsil-hockey tournament!"

"Oh, I - HEY!" Too late. The blonde was already out the door leaving a faint breeze and dust billows behind him.


Demyx stuffed another handful of popcorn into his mouth as he mentally ran lines with the movie that blazed on the TV screen. He had decided to put off actually celebrating until next week when everyone wouldn't be so busy (and his parents would be). The clock read 5:45. Damn. Almost 6:00 and he still didn't know who had been sending him the roses. The doubt was still bounding around in his head that this was an elaborate prank. He grimaced and tried to focus back on the screen. He was finding it increasingly harder to be distracted from just sitting there and watching the door. Hmmmm… he had all this extra energy thanks to the damn adrenaline, maybe if he got rid of it…

He promptly leapt up off of the couch and popped in his favorite mix-CD, pumping the volume all the way up. The vases and family photos resting alongside the stereo began to shake as the bass boomed and the hyperactive blonde began to shake his hips wildly to the "uhn-tiss, uhn-tiss." He was going all out- lip sync, air guitar, the whole nine yards with every song. Completely immersed in his performance of Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody," he let out a shriek as the door bell interrupted his plea for freedom. Wondering how the hell he'd ever heard it over the opera-like voices, he ran to turn off the stereo and answer the door. "Coming, coming, COMING! DON'T LEAVE!" His heart was pounding as his voice escalated. He straightened his shirt and cracked his neck. He grasped the door knob, twisting quickly with a flick of the rest, yanking the door open-

"MARLUXIA?!"

A look of genuine shock washed over his features. His gut dropped and his heart stopped. What… the… HELL?! Ah, there was NO way-

"What? Oh- OH… Oh, no! No no no no- it's not what it looks like. I'm just doing my job." The pink-haired delivery boy thrust a bouquet of two dozen red roses in the blonde's face.

Phew. That was scary.

"Y-Yeah. Okay, thanks." Demyx said gingerly taking the huge bundle of flowers.

"You're welcome. Now as much as I'd love to stay and chat, I've got another eight houses to hit, so I'll see you later." Marluxia turned and waved as he walked off the porch. He wanted so badly to stay and see the spastic blonde's reaction, but he didn't dare piss his grandmother off with late deliveries. "Happy birthday, by the way!" he shouted back as he pulled out.

Demyx waved briefly, then b-lined back into the house, kicking the door shut and quickly grabbing a glass and filling it with water. He set the roses in the water, kinking the twenty four stems into the small space, proturding the roses out at odd angles and began sifting through them, looking for the card. Once the mere edge caught his eye he yanked it out and held the little envelope with shaking hands. This was it- oh, happy birthday indeed! Okay… moment of truth...

He gently lifted the flap and pulled out the message card…

Demyx,

"…Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps..."

I hope my message was loud and clear. I also hope Cupid knows what the hell he's doing. Happy birthday.

-Xigbar

"Oh… my … God…" Okay, this had to be a prank. Unless… he ran and grabbed a note sheet he'd borrowed from Xigbar earlier that day. The handwriting matched.

But anyone can forge a signature, can't they? And besides, what would suggest that-

"…Maybe you drove whoever this is crazy. Maybe they're just returning the favor…"

"…No, no-I'm pretty sure it's out of romance…You oughtta be proud of yourself for making somebody go all-out like this…."

"…I can't afford a detention today- I've got plans…"

The card fluttered gracefully to the floor, followed not-so-gracefully by Demyx.




The sun shone clearly overhead causing several students to retreat under the cheap awning outside the gym, burning time until another day of prissy teachers and rotting textbooks.

Xigbar leaned against one of the thick support poles while talking to Xaldin who was scouting the growing crowd for his own blond.

"So, do you think it worked?" Xigbar asked watching a bird add twigs and a candy wrapper to its nest.

Xaldin brushed a stray dreadlock off his shoulder. "Well, if he avoids you, or tries to murder you with that crazy whatchamacallit he calls an instrument, we'll know."

"Wow, you're no help…" the scarred teen muttered under his breath. He sighed and rested his head against the pole. Out in the distance he noticed a shocking blonde head attached to a shapely body that moved with a feminine swagger under the weight of an over-stuffed back pack and a lack of coffee, complete with a face twisted in tired fustration.

"Hey, Larxene! Your ass-leech is over here!" he yelled. Xaldin punched him in the arm for mocking his avid groping of his girlfriend's butt (at least he had someone to grab at). Upon hearing her name, Larxene straightened her posture, swapped the angled brow for a sexy smile, and sauntered over the dreadlocked teen.

" 'Morning," she said wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a deep kiss. Under the full enjoyment of sucking face, Xaldin's hand began a cautious trek up to the girl's side and down to her butt.

"Hey, watch it!" she pulled away upon feeling fingers grazing over her back jeans pockets.

Xaldin twisted his lips and rolled his eyes in defeat. "Dammit…"

Xigbar bit back a laugh. Some things just never changed…

"Xigbar!" a voice rang loud and clear across the quad and jerked him out of his daze. Snapping his head upright, he saw a sandy blonde mullet-hawk racing towards him, waving violently.

"Oh, here we go…" whispered Larxene.

Xigbar's heart quickened as his feet remained anchored to the ground. His body felt like a ton of bricks, he barely managed to stand himself up off of the pole. Oh shit…

The blonde raced up to him, panting.

"Hey Demyx…" he forced out. The only thing giving away his nervous state was his widened eye and disjointed speech.

"Hey," Demyx said, swallowing an lifting himself up. His knees were shaking. "Xigbar… about the roses… I... um... I just wanted to…" he was already blushing madly.

"Yeah?"

"I…" Upon finding himself forgetting the speech he practiced for half an hour in the mirror that morning, Demyx grabbed Xigbars' hands and leaned up to nervously plant a clumsy kiss halfway on his mouth.

"Thank you." He said as he pulled back, smiling at the awe-struck Xigbar, whose cheeks held the faintest hint of fuchsia. He felt his own face heat up even more. He gave the scarred teen another shy smile before releasing his hands and running off at top speed.

Xigbar's eye threatened to fall out of its socket as he turned his head to follow the blonde's trail. He stood rigid, unable to believe what just happened.

"Well, I'd say that went over pretty well," said Xaldin. Xigbar remained unresponsive.

"Uh… Xigbar?" Larxene reached over to swat Xigbar back into consciousness.

The cyclops responded by silently falling flat onto the pavement.