The X-Filer


"Hello and welcome to the newest and most controversial Television Show in DC history, Big Brother: Unleased. I am your host Agent Michelle Harp and we are gathered just outside the House that not 1, not 2, but 30 people have been chosen by you the public to enter and become housemates for the next couple of months. But before we meet the new housemates, I would like to introduce my co-host, he's an FBI Assistant Director and always looks his best, please give a hand for, Walter Skinner" The crowd went wild as Skinner walked out and waved his hand in the air as he strided up to Harp

"Thankyou Michelle, now we better not keep the viewers waiting because we have many, many housemates to get through so without further ado, please make welcome our first two housemates. They are partners in the FBI, one believes in the paranormal while the other is a sceptic but both love working together, it's Agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully!" The crowd went wild as Mulder and Scully walked out. Mulder waved and seemed happy but Scully on the other hand didn't look pleased at all as they sat on the couch next to the two hosts

"So Agent Mulder" Harp started "Why do you think the public picked the 2 of you? You seem to be the favourites this year?" Mulder straightened his suit

"Well you see Michelle I think it's the fact that they love the paranormal and well I guess Scully and I make a cute couple" Mulder wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. Skinner smiled

"Thankyou Agents, now each housemate is taken to a lockdown room and await the signal to be sent into the house. So as we watch Mulder and Scully leave, please give a warm welcome for our next two guest, they have nothing in common and they probably don't know each other, it's Diana Fowley and Philip Padgett" The crowd booed as Diana walked out but clapped as Padgett came out behind her. They both sat down

"So Diana I heard you have a thing for Agent Mulder, is that true?" Harp asked excitedly. Diana leaned across to the mic

"Yes and I just want to say Dana Scully had better watchout because Fowley is about to enter the house!" The crowd booed as Skinner quietened them down

"Now Philip Padgett for all those who don't know you, you starred in a short film called? What was it called again?"

"It was called Milagro, it was about an obsessed man in love with a red hair FBI agent" Skinner nodded

"Well, we'll be sure to see it. Now our next two housemates have something in common, they both are bad to the bone. Please welcome Alex Krychek and the man known as only The Cigarette Smoking man!" Skinner announced. The crowd cheered as they both came out, when they both sat down, a voice shouted from the crowd

"Quit smoking!" Smoking man looked out and just puffed some smoke in the viewers direction

"So Alex why do you think you and old Ciggie got picked to enter the house?"

"Who said we got picked?" Skinner and Harp both looked at each other before Harp continued

"Ok then, thankyou. Now the next two Agents aren't as popular as Mulder and Scully but they still love being partners, it's Agent John Doggett and Monica Reyes!" The crowd clapped as they both walked out, Skinner cleared his throat

"So Agents do you think you have a good chance at winning at the end?" He asked. Doggett took the mic for a moment

"Hell yeah! And I speak for Monica when I say this, we love DC!" The crowd started in a chant

"Doggett! Reyes! Doggett! Reyes!!" Skinner tried to calm them as both Agents walked off. Harp cleared her throat

"Well that was unexpected. For our next 3 housemates. They are the most paranoid people I know, and they also have their newspaper out now. It the Lone Gunmen!" As the gunmen walked out there were die hard fans screaming and waving their papers shouting 'I want to believe!' The Gunmen sat down as Harp continued "So I heard you boys believe in a government conspiracy?"

"That's right pretty lady" Frohike said glancing across at her

"Is there anything you would like to say to the crowd before you leave and enter the house?" All the Gunmen lifted their hands in the air

"Never believe the lie!" They shouted, the crowd laughed and cheered as they exited the stage. Harp looked at Skinner and smiled. Skinner held the mic up

"They will do great things one day. On to our next 2 housemates they come from an inmate anger social group and would love for anything in the world to be out of prison. It's Tommy Ryder and Reggie!" the crowd went silent as they came out, not sure who they were. They both sat down and Reggie looked at the crowd then at Skinner

"Are you the butterfly king?" He asked. Skinner moved across a bit as Harp continued

"So Tommy for all those people who don't know you, can you tell us who you are?" Tommy nodded

"Yes Michelle, I am Tommy and this is Reggie and we belong to an anger social group that is run by the DC prison. We had a biography written about us only a little while back it's called Choose Wisely/ Choose or lose that was published on an internet site called FanFiction. net" He finished

"Very Good, we'll be sure to maybe one day check it out" Harp smiled as Reggie and Tommy walked away she looked across to Skinner as he introduced the next housemates

"Now our next housemates have only one thing in common and that is they both believe in conspiracy, please welcome. Max Fenig and Deep Throat" The crowd clapped as they came out. Skinner shook their hands "So Max for those who don't know you, you once apparently got abducted off a plane and claim to be a multiple abductee is that right?" Skinner asked

"Yes Walter, it was and I tell if you ever get abducted, make sure you wear warm clothes, it's cold in space" Some of the audience laughed as Skinner moved onto Deep Throat.

"And you once got shot on a bridge, how did you survive?" He asked curiously. Deep throat coughed

"You know what I don't really know" He smiled as he looked at Skinner

"Well then I guess we better move on. Our next two ladies that are entering the house are both blonde and love to keep fit, so can you please welcome. Agent Leyla Harrison and Marita Covarrubias" The crowd clapped as they came out "So ladies are you feeling excited about entering the house?" he asked Harrison

"Yes, well I think so, I feel kinda nervous but then happy at the same time, I can't wait to see Agent Mulder and Scully" Skinner nodded

"And what about you Marita?" Marita crossed her arms

"I think this is a waste of time" Skinner laughed

"Well there you have it, now with a lot of people down and a lot more to go please make welcome Director Kersh and Donnie Phaster" The crowd booed as the two men came on stage

"Oh Zip it" Kersh said to the crowd. Donnie looked on at all the beautiful hair that was out there, as Skinner turned to him

"So Donnie how do you think Agent Scully will react to you in the house?" he asked. Donnie looked at him

"I hope she has kept her hair shampooed" he said quietly. Skinner raised and eyebrow

"Ok then, Michelle"

"Yes now onto our next two Agents, they are best friends and work in backgrounding it's Agents George Myers and Dean Fuller!" the crowd laughed and clapped as they both came out, Harp smiled at Myers "So Myers why do you think you and Fuller were picked?" she asked. He leaned across

"Because we are so adorable and ladies men" Skinner laughed as he watched Myers kiss Harp

"Well I don't know about you but that was definitely adorable" Skinner said smiling again. Just then a Director from the show came out and whispered something. Skinner nodded "Alright I have just been inform that we have to speed it up, because the grand final of American Idol is on next, so we've nearly run out of hour. So our next four housemates are all different but still very interesting, please welcome our Indian friend, who can decode ancient writing, Albert Hosteen. Our next housemate is from the X-cops series and is afraid of wasp men, it's Deputy Keith Wetzel!. Another Agent with blonde hair and a good heart who loves team building with her partner, it's Agent Stonecyper!" The Crowd cheered and clapped as the housemates lined up. Harp smiled then continued on

"Well and for the last of the four housemates, it's another Scully who's sure to keep an eye out for his sister, it's Bill Scully everyone!"

"Whoa!!" Everyone screamed as he walked out. Harp continued

"And let's not forget the man that is rumoured to be a vampire, he doesn't mind a bit of Bad Blood, Sheriff Lucius Hartwell!" Skinner tried to calm the crowd down as Harp continued "And second last we have a celebrity that may not be as famous as some, he also played a demon in a short film, Terms of Endearment, it's Bruce Campbell!" Skinner and Harp clapped as he walked out. Skinner shook his hand and Harp gave him a kiss. Skinner held up the mic

"And now for our final housemate. She's not known by anyone, we found her by the Biotech labs in downtown DC, She looks kind of interesting, she doesn't speak much so we made a name up for her, it's Miss Bio" The crowd stared as a thin long black hair girl came out and walked up to Skinner. "So Miss Bio, what do you do for a living?" The girl looked at him, then without warning licked him up the side of the face. Everyone looked at her shocked. Skinner wiped his face "Well that was strange" Miss Bio smiled then walked over to Harp and sniffed her arm. Harp just looked puzzled. Bio stood up and smiled. Harp just stared

"Well, ok then" Harp adjusted her mic before continuing, she faced the crowd "So there you have it folks, your housemates that you nominated! And now we…" Just then the Director of the show came out with a piece of paper and ushered Skinner and Harp in close. Seconds later they both stared at each other

"Us?" They both said in unison. The Director nodded before walking off. Harp turned to the crowd

"Well by some strange turns of events it seems Walter and I have been nominated to go in the house, but who will be the host?" Just then a fatty build man walked out smiling and holding a mic

"Hello and welcome, I am Morris Fletcher and I will be your host from now on" they looked at him


"Yes me, now let's not live in a Dreamland, move it! Idol's on next we're running out of time!" He ushered Harp and Skinner off stage then walked back to the centre and cleared his throat. "Now that all housemates are in lock down we will cross to you live from the house just after this ad from our sponsors"


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Everyone entered the house and looked around

"Wow, nice place" Padgett said. Hosteen looked at the door that said Living room

"Look, there is the living room" Everyone filed into the room and sat on a large rounded lounge. In the centre laid a folded piece of paper set on a small table. With a note that said: 'Agent Scully read.' Scully stood up and walked over to it. All eyes on her. She unfolded the paper and read aloud

"Housemates, Big Brother welcomes you to the house. Whilst in the house you will have allocated work that will be revealed as the days progress. The following are rules set to the house. All rules are to be abided by all housemates…

Dress code:

1. It is advised that you come to work dressed according to the work you've been allocated.

2. If we see you wearing inappropriate clothing while working, you will be sent to the pen

3. All clothes are provided by Big Brother, there is no exceptions.

Sick Days:

Big Brother will no longer accept a doctor's certificate of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to work.

Holidays Days:

Each housemate will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.

Meal Time:

Breakfast will be at 8am everyday

Lunch will be at 1pm everyday

Dinner will be at 7pm everyday

Meals will be prepared everyday by 2 allocated Housemates and all housemates must be at sitting at the table by this time. Those who aren't will be sent to the pen without food. If you require a snack you must inform Big Brother first.


There is to be no smoking in the Big Brother house. Cigarette patches will be supplied. Failure to abide by the rules, housemates will be sent to the pen.

Toilet Use:

1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict 3 minute

time limit in the cubicles.

2. At the end of the 3 minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper will retract, the cubicle door will open and your picture will be taken.

3. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the house's notice board under the 'Chronic Offenders' category.

4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sent to the pen.

5. Chronic offenders after that will result in a more force able situation.


Bedtime will be at 9 O'clock pm, everyone must be in bed by this time or be locked out for their assigned rooms.

Wake up time is at 6:30am, those who aren't out of bed at this time will have the bed bounce and fold back into the wall.

Damages to the house:

There is to be no damages to the house.

Damages to the house will result in extreme measures being taken against the offender.

Rules to date:

These are the rules to date, updates will be notified by Big Brother. Thankyou for your loyalty to our house. We hope you have a enjoyable stay." Scully stopped reading and just stared. Most of the others just sat with their mouths open.

"Well I don't know about anyone but I don't think I'm going to go to the toilet in a while" Mulder said out loud. There was an agreement by several other housemates. Then Tommy stood up

"Well where is this guy that we're supposed to be controlled by?" He said looking around. Suddenly a voice echoed throughout the house

"Housemates, this is Big Brother… Welcome to the house"





Thanks to my sister for the ad… Leadwear :)

Let me know if you did like it and want me to continue

I promise it will get more interesting this is just the intro...

Now if you go to my profile you will see a poll

I'm not going to tell you what it's for but I need 3 people chosen for it… :)

BIG BROTHER is here…