Yey (I have made it a tradition to start ALL my stories with this word, or one of it's brethren)

I have your request BLACKDRAGONFLOWER-channnnn!! :dances:

I am pretty pleased with it. Just so you know, there's a teensy lime towards the may suck, I don't know. (suck hahahaa)

Anyway, I really hope you like it, because you don't have the slightest clue ow much I enjoyed what you did to Don't Jump! Uwahhh I think even Bill liked it, and I can guarantee he can't read english!

IT WAS THAT GOOD!! :dances yet again:

Ps. Our roleplay is so super special awesome!! You and I should steal Mattie's Bubble Gum Princess game, and lay it when you're done reading this!! LOL

FUNNY-NESS-NESS ensues in this super special awesome request fic entitled...


"Shit! Mells! Kira almost got us!" Matt cried breathlessly, pulling out his DS.

"Matt, that wasn't Kira. It was some hoe that thought you were hot, and she was chasing us for your number!" Mello yelled back to him, with a sting of jealousy lacing his tone.

"Yeah...and that's why she wanted my NAME too!! Haaha get real, Mells!" Matt mumbled through a cigarette.

Mello didn't even give a smart ass answer as to why she wanted his name as well. I mean, maybe it was because she needed something to put above the number on that napkin besides: Sexy Goggle Dude.

But that was only maybe, so Mello kept it inside.

Something suddenly clicked inside Matt's brain, and so he dropped his DS and grabbed Mello's shoulders harshly. Thus causing Mello's chocolate to rest on the floor next to Matt's game.

"What the hell, Jerk!? I was eating that!!" He cried, and Matt just shook his shoulders relentlessly.

"We need disguises Mells!"

Mello looked as if he had just been told his name was Mello, and he had a chocolate addiction.

"Are you fuckin' stupid? You play those games too much! We don't need disguises!" He slapped the back of Matt's neck, and the red head let is friend go.

"Yeah, we do!! You know what I'm sayin'?? Incognitooooo" He sang the last word as if he were drunk and it made Mello feel a bit sick himself.

"Christ, save me from this crack-ass-head." He prayed to himself, while kissing his rosary gently.

"Mello, you know damn well I only smoke normal cigarettes! I haven't even tried anything else!" Matt cried to his defense.

"Yeah, it pisses me off you went and tried those!" Mello rolled his eyes, and grabbed his chocolate.

"Well you were never there!" Matt hissed bitterly, and Mello almost dropped his chocolate again.

"Okay, now that I feel like a total ass, humor me. Let's uh, let's go get..." Matt smiled at Mello's words.

He was the only one who could ever make Mello feel like an ass...EVER. And he made a point to do it on a regular basis.

"Say it Mells!" He cried happily.

"No way in hell, or I'm not going."

Matt's lower lip stuck out on cue, and his eyes grew glossy. "Fine, I'll just have to leave you lie you left me so long agoooo..." He threatened Mello dramatically, and got up to leave.

Behind him he heard a few curses in about four different languages, then a low hum.

"What was that? I couldn't quite hear you..." Matt turned and placed a hand behind his ear.

Mello sighed loudly. "I said. In. Cog. Nitooooo." He said with far less enthusiasm than Matt.

The younger man perked up and giggled almost like a little girl, then pulled Mello out of the apartment and back onto the streets.

Matt walked in front of Mello, dragging him along the sidewalk for a good five minutes, before some girl winked at him, and asked for his name.

Then he was behind Mello, and was squeezing his hand no longer in power, but in fear. (a/n: XD)

They slid into a shady looking costume store. It was the middle of summer, not even remotely close to Halloween, yet this kind of store was still open, and making money. This made Mello really wonder what the hell was wrong with people, but then he'd have to justify why HE was there as well.

So once again, Mello kept it inside.

"So what can I help you boys with today?" The girl at the counter asked when they walked in.

Mello scowled and Matt shrieked. He probably shit himself too.

"Mells! That's the girl!! That's the same girl from earlier! THAT'S KIRA!" Matt squeaked frantically.

"Shut the hell up I know!" Mello whispered back, harshly.

"OH MY GOD! I remember you! You never did give me your name either...oh and that number isn't working too well for me." The girl smiled. "Some kid always answers and says he's playing and to call back later. He's done that since you gave me the you have a little brother?"

Matt shot Mello a -I'm shocked now, but I'm gonna laugh my ass off later- look and howled "YOU DID NOT, MELLS!!"

Mello smirked slyly. "I sooo did!!"

They both broke into violent laughter and the girl just looked at them, puzzled.

"Uh, either way, what's your name?" She asked again, and Matt paled.

"He doesn't want to tell you." Mello stepped in.

"Oh? And what are you? His boyfriend?" The girl snapped at Mello.

"Bitch, for all you know I could be fucking him into a pink, sex, Jeffery Starr butcher knife." Mello shot back, with a wink for added effect.

Matt was laughing pretty hard at his 'boyfriend' but he managed to choke an apology to the girl. "I'm sorry, he's not my boyfriend, we're just--"

"Lovers." Mello interrupted. "Now, we're off to get some GAY costumes, for a GAY party, full of GAY ass guys, doing GAY things for YAOI loving girls...who are so much sexier than you by the way..." Mello sad very bluntly, grabbed Matt's arm, and pulled him to the back where costumes were, not hesitating to grab his ass on the way.

When they were in the back, they nearly died laughing at the girl's expense. Both boys imitating her facial expression, and such, while vainly looking for a costume.

"God! There isn't shit here!" Matt said after he'd been looking for twenty minutes.

"Mello found an EMOOO costume for youuu" Mello sang and thrust the costume at Matt without even showing hi what it was. Then he pushed his poor best friend into the changing room.

"Mello! You're an absolute ASS you know that?"

"Of course, bitch. Now, put it on."

Matt shrugged. No arguing with Mello when he was high on a superiority complex, plus it was HIS idea to come. He should try on first.

Sometime later, Matt had grown pissed. A mop of blonde hair was smashed onto his head and after it was straightened out for him, he saw it was pulled into pig tails.

"Your ass is mine, Mells! Who do you even have me dressed as??"

"Uhhh" Mello read from the package "Misa Misa. Ohhhh it's that actress..." He then tossed the pack.

"Don't 'Ohhhh it's that actress' me, you sick fuck!! You know that's who we're watching, and you KNOW I hate her!" Matt screamed.

Mello's frown turned into a full on smirk. "ohh...hey Mattie, do you think you could, mmm, yell at me again? me a sick fuck, one more time?"

"Of course, I can yell at you, dick! I mean it was my idea to come here, but now I'm like really pissed and this is wrong! You need to fuckin' burn! I totally hate you man! AND HELL NO I'm not over reacting!"

"Matt, keep yelling, it's so damn sexy..."

"What the hell!? I'm yelling at you, and you think-"

Mello gripped the tight dress Matt had on, and ran his hand from the top of a stocking all the way up to Matt's ass.

"What the--" Matt didn't get to finish because Mello was up to his ear, breathing heavy onto his neck. "I guess me saying I was your boyfriend turned me on a little...then getting you in these clothes and yelling made it worse..." The blonde nipped at Matt's sensitive skin and a husky growl erupted from him.

"Mello, stop...this is weird."

Mello snorted. "You know you love it." He cupped Matt before he could register what Mello had said to him, and he moaned loudly.

The 'Kira' girl was most definitely going to have nightmares.

"See that?... You're already hard, and we haven't even done shit. Haven't you ever wondered what it would be like to fuck guy, Mattie-Mattie?" Mello began as he stroke Matt from under the dress.

The red head could barely stand, his knees felt like jelly, and he was seeing stars.

A bead of sweat trickled down his forehead to his jawline where Mello caught it on his tongue and licked up Matt's ear.

Matt's belly stirred and his groin was on fire. Mello was going to be the first person to make him come, besides himself. This thought made his palms all clammy.

"Huh, Mattie-Mattie? Have you ever?"

Matt was going to come, soon. There was no way around it.

"Ah, Mells...umm...I'm ah." He couldn't even speak anymore.

"Have you ever wondered what it would be like to fuck me?"

Those words were all it took, that, and one more little tug on Mattie-Mattie's virgin "sign of manhood"

(a/n I read that line somewhere, and loved I used it XD)

"You've never been touched by anyone before have you?" Mello asked once Matt had began breathing regularly again.

Matt nodded 'yes' and Mello's sadistic laughter filled the room.

"Well then, we'd better get going. I'm hard as hell, and you're wearing a lolita dress covered in come."

The girl was gone when they went to leave, so they simply took the dress. They figured they were doing the workers a favor, honestly, in it;s condition...nobody would miss it.

Outside they walked home as if nothing had happened. "Mello, are you going to do that to me again sometime?" Matt asked quietly.

"Why? You like it?"

"Yeah a lot actually. I don;t know man, I think I might be gay for you..." Matt laughed.

"I wouldn't give a shit! I'm your fucking boyfriend!! Your ass BETTER like me!" Mello joked.

"But in all seriousness... when we get home, it's my turn. And we're doing it the good way."

Matt looked at him with a confused look dancing over is expression. "What's the good way?" He asked.

Mello looked at him hard and replied with a simple "bark, bark." teasing him.

Matt looked horrified and and sighed, grabbing his already sore behind, then running after Mello back to their apartment.

Ahhh I hope you liked it. I spent my whole night typing it, while I could be doing something else! I'm just kidding!! It was worth it! I love you! (like a friend XD) I hope you like this as much as I do!!

And about the Jeffery Starr Butcher knife thing...a guy on youtube called MeowMeowMitchell says it! He's the best emo guy on youtube! Yeah I called him Emo lmao! I should know!! XDDD

Also, when Matt called Mello a sick fuck? That was what Bill called Tomi when he was pissed at him!! (Ich Liebe Tokio Hotel XDDD)