Warnings: shonen ai. fluffy AkuRoku moments; some Demyx/Zexion
Chapter 1: Demyx the Weatherman
There were rare moments in the Organization when there was nothing for them to do other than laze about the castle in complete boredom. It was usually during those moments that Axel would light someone on fire or Luxord would coerce someone into playing strip poker for his own sick amusement.
It was because of those moments that Xemnas decided to assign different jobs to them, mainly so they would leave him the hell alone.
In hindsight, finding a way for them to create their own television show probably wasn't his greatest idea. From it spawned Axel's idea to do a show about pranking people, Luxord's gambling show, Marluxia's floral show and strip tease, and Larxene teaching everyone the best way to electrocute people and cause tons of pain without actually killing them.
And then there was Demy's "local" weather program.
Everyone told him that it wouldn't be a good idea. They all knew that it would be cloudy and rainy all the time, so why create a weather program to tell them what they already knew?
But Demyx would just smile and continue on with preparing for his show and when the time came for the first one, all of the other Nobodies gathered around the television to hear what he had to say.
"Today there will be bright, sunny skies all around!" Demyx cheerfully chirped. "There's also a thirty percent chance of a southwest wind of up to twenty miles-per-hour. It's the perfect day to go out and get some sunbathing, folks! Just make sure to not get burnt. Have a nice day!"
The program flicked over to a commercial of Vexen demonstrating the proper usage of whipped cream, cool whip, and shaving cream and dulling informing everyone that it is not fun to get a face full of any of them. For some reason, Axel and Roxas were very fond of the commercial and had taken to randomly quoting it whenever they felt like it.
"He's lost it." Larxene muttered, getting up. "Everyone knows that it's never sunny around here. He could have at least been truthful." She walked over to the window and grasped the string and pulled up the blinds. "He can't honestly expect us to be… lieve…" She stared out the window in shock. "It's sunny!"
"We get your point, Larxene." Marluxia muttered, rolling his eyes.
"No, really! It's sunny!" Larxene insisted. "Come and look it you don't believe me!" A thoughtful look came over her face. "You know… a little sun sounds nice. If anyone cares, I'll be outside."
The guys watched in shock as Larxene happily skipped away, humming a little song. As soon as she was gone, they all rushed over to peer out the window. Expressions of amusement turned to ones of shock in a matter of seconds.
"Holy shit! She was telling the truth!" Marluxia exclaimed. It only took him a millisecond to take off running after Larxene. "Wait up, beautiful! I'll help you put on your sun tan lotion!"
There was the sound of something being zapped by lightning and then Marluxia fell back through the doorway, twitching.
"Yowch. That looks like it hurts." Xigbar remarked. "Y'know, I think I'll be going outside a different way. Later, dudes." He vanished into a dark portal.
Demyx's weather show became an instant hit around the castle as he predicted sunny skies day after day. His predictions came true every time and soon everyone, with the exception of Saix, Vexen, Zexion, and Axel, were sporting nice tans as a result of the nice weather.
Xemnas especially appreciated the weather program, as it got the majority of the idiots out of the castle and away from him. He should have known that the peacefulness wouldn't last for long.
For Axel and Roxas, the nice weather gave them the chance to lounge about outside and make plans over who to strike next for their prank show. They ended up accumulating a great deal of material and tested it out on people in the various worlds before bringing the pranks home to the castle.
The two of them had already pranked almost everyone in the castle once, although they got Xemnas three times just for the hell of it. The only people left they hadn't gotten to were each other, Larxene, and a certain water-loving weatherman.
And boy did they have a prank for him.
As fate would have it, Demyx was already not having a good morning by the time he got down to breakfast. He had run out of toothpaste, his favorite slippers were missing, his shirt with music notes on it needed to be cleaned, one of his pet fish had died, and his cloak was found with a 'kick me' sign glued to the back of it.
Not one of those things had anything to do with Axel and Roxas's prank.
When he stomped into the kitchen to locate his favorite Wednesday breakfast, everyone stopped what they were doing to look at him. It was a very rare thing to see Demyx upset and an even rarer thing to see him angry. Naturally, they all assumed it was Axel's doing.
"What did you do to him?" Xigbar hissed, ready to summon his gun to shoot Axel at a moment's notice.
"Nothing!" Axel said with a guilty expression on his face. "Right, Roxas?"
Axel looked at his best friend, disappointed. "You're not going to help me? I really didn't do anything!" Pouting, he spooned out some of the cereal he was eating and stuck it in his mouth.
"WHERE THE HELL ARE MY LUCKY CHARMS?!" Demyx exploded in rage.
Axel nearly choked on his spoon when everyone looked at him and then pointed in his direction. He had forgotten that it was Wednesday and that every Wednesday Demyx would eat Lucky Charms for breakfast. The last time someone ate the last box of Lucky Charms on a Wednesday, well, lets just say that Xigbar learned a very important lesson that day.
Everyone moved out of the way as Demyx slowly turned and glared at Axel. Behind him, the sink began to hiss as water poured out of it and formed a huge tidal wave wall. "AXEL!!"
The wall of water hit Axel with the force of a semi-truck and swept him out into the hallway and slammed him into a wall. Xemnas stopped and stared at the water now soaking the once luxurious carpet. He watched as Axel coughed and sputtered up water.
Then Xemnas sighed and turned around, fishing out a cell phone from a pocket in his cloak. "Hello, Nobody's Home Repair? Yes, this is Xemnas again. No, it's not the wall this time. Or the glass paneling. Number Eleven says 'thank you', by the way. No, this time I need some carpet replaced. Why? Well, you're never going to believe this, but a huge tidal wave swept through our kitchen…" He stepped over Axel and continued down the hall.
Later that day all of the Nobody's gathered around the one huge television to watch the weather report like usual. Larxene was happily rubbing in sun tan lotion in preparation for another beautifully sunny day.
And then the news cut on with Demyx sitting there looking extremely pissed off. He grinned this supremely evil grin that had even Xaldin and Larxene wanting to cower in their seats.
"Today there is a one-hundred percent chance of dangerous thunderstorms along with a cold front coming down from the north. That's dangerous weather, folks, since it means there's a very strong chance of man-killing tornadoes sweeping through to cause mass destruction. We've also got a ninety percent chance of hail balls the size of golf balls and wind speeds of up to seventy-five-miles-per-hour." He tapped his papers against the desk, keeping the same evil grin on his face. "Have a nice day, everyone!"
The weather cut off to a commercial of Axel getting pummeled by the wall of water, but no one in the room so much as moved. The shock of hearing Demyx, cheerful, goofy, nutty little Demyx, give such a horrible weather report in such a happy tone gave them all chills.
Lightning flashed just outside the window and the roar of thunder that followed made the entire castle shudder.
Xigbar was the first to recover. "Y-y'know, I think I'll go see if the Superior has any missions." Without giving his usual "Later, dudes.", he summoned up a portal and vanished into it.
Many of the others soon followed, or else vanished to their rooms, leaving only Roxas and Axel sitting in the room.
"See, this is exactly why I want to leave the Organization." Roxas crossly informed Axel.
Roxas sighed. "Come on, Axel. Lets go use the prank on Xemnas. You know he'll be all cheerful since the others are going to beg for missions for once. What do you say?"
"You really want to prank Xemmy?" Axel asked, looking at Roxas in shock. "But you never want to prank anyone! Not willingly! I always have to beg and beg and beg before you help me!"
"I'm feeling generous today." Roxas said, crossing his arms over his chest. "Now lets go before I change my mind."
"Okay!" Axel leapt to his feet and hugged his favorite little blond. "Hey, Rox?"
"You'll protect me from Demyx, right?'
Amusement. "Sure, Axel."
"And another thing, remind me not to ever prank Demyx."
Axel happily nuzzled his friend.
Axel grinned and let go of Roxas before grabbing his arm and tugging him toward the door. "C'mon! Lets go prank Xemnas!"
Demyx stood outside of the Endless Library, occasionally peering through the window at the slate gray-haired male sitting at a table reading a book. He fidgeted a little and then leaned against the wall with a sigh. "C'mon, Demyx. Just go for it!"
It'd been almost a week since his horrible Wednesday, and since then there had been bright, sunny skies once again, with an occasionally rain shower.
He took a deep breath and then marched into the library and over to Zexion, who looked up at him with a bored expression on his face.
"Can I help you?" He asked.
"Y-yeah, I-uh…" Demyx nervously stared at the floor. "I was, uh, wondering if…" He said the last part so quietly that Zexion had a hard time understanding what he said.
"Could you repeat that?"
"Sorry, I have plans." Zexion said, sounding somewhat sorry.
"O-oh." Demyx forced a smile on his face. "Okay. Maybe some other time."
Instead of walking out of the library, he called up a portal and let it take him away to his room, where he spent the rest of the night crying.
The next morning the others were surprised to turn on the television to the weather and find Demyx sobbing and talking about a huge rainstorm that could last for days and days. Once he finished with the weather, he collapsed on the desk, crying even more and mumbling about how Zexion hates him.
Someone turned off the TV and slowly everyone left the living room, wondering if they'll ever see another sunny day in The World That Never Was.
"Zexion, you didn't happen to do anything to Demyx yesterday, did you?"
Zexion looked up from his book to see Saix standing in front of him. He quickly hid his surprise at seeing the berserker in the library for the first time ever. "Not that I can recall. Why?"
Saix raised an eyebrow. "Didn't you watch the weather this morning? He predicted rain for the next week and then collapsed into a pathetic weeping mess. He was muttering your name. Something about you hating him."
"Why would I hate him? And why would he cry over that?"
"Well, he does…" Saix hesitated a moment, his face twisting up in disbelief. "Like you an awful lot."
Zexion stared at him for a moment. "What are you suggesting?"
Axel randomly sticks his head in the doorway and, with a large grin on his face, proclaims, "Demyx lurves Zexion!" Then he runs on past, laughing his head off.
Zexion and Saix stare at the doorway, wondering what the pyromaniac was up to and if he was really telling the truth.
"Axel! Get back here right now!" Roxas yelled, running past in nothing but a towel. "Give me back my clothes, you sick pervert!"
"Never!" They could hear Axel's reply from down the hall, which was shortly followed by a particularly loud yelp as Roxas doubtlessly threw something at him.
Saix cleared his throat and looked back over at Zexion. "So, nice weather we're having."
"Yes, lovely." Zexion agreed.
Saix stood there for a moment before quickly leaving the library, vowing to never again walk into the place.
Miraculously, the next day Demyx was once again predicting sunny skies and was all smiles and laughs even when Axel and Roxas played a teeny prank on him. Saix suspected that it had something to do with the pleased look on Zexion's face as the Cloaked Schemer sat within close proximity of the Melodious Nocturne.
"See, I told you that Demyx loves Zexion." Axel all-too-happily said to Roxas.
"And I told you that Zexion likes Demyx. So we're even." The blond nonchalantly replied. "Now eat your cheerios. We have a show to do."
Axel beamed and proceeded to dump spoonfuls of sugar into his cheerios before eating.
Never again will he so much as touch another box of Lucky Charms.
You know what I've noticed? I try to write a nice little story about one person, but others end up stealing the show! Bad Roxy and Axel! This was suppose to be Demmy's one-shot! (sighs)
I have an idea for the next one that still needs to be worked out. All I'll say right now is that it involves one of Vexen's "infamous" experiments, Saix, and Demyx. (and probably some random AkuRoku-ness on the side.)