A/N: Enough with Suspian! It's time for something new!!

Happy belated anniversary, mom and dad! You both know how much I hate romance, but this stupid plot bunny wouldn't let go of me. I kept thinking of how freakin' tired I was of Suspian, and how funny it would be if she wound up with that nerd in the movie, and how Dad is the nerd and Mom is the Susan...so, yeah. I caved. Pardon me if the writing is rough and the romance is awful; I've never done anything like this before.

So it is with much love that I grudgingly present to you this giftfic...


Phyllis

--

Chapter 1: The Most Noble Order of the Cookie

"I hope it stays clear tonight," Susan murmured, glancing out the window as she swept the last of the cookie-dough crumbs off the countertop. A light breeze ruffled the lace curtains, mixing fresh air with the warm, sweet aroma that filled the room, and the radio crackled cheerfully in the background.

The kitchen was a marvelous place when cookies were baking.

"They smell so good, Mummy..."

"Mmm, they do." She knelt down with her daughter to admire the golden-brown delights. "And look, Lucy! They're almost done. You're going to have a lot on your hands, guarding those from your father...oh dear, Andrew's fussing again."

She sighed and stood to her feet, took a baby bottle from the counter and went over to deal with the screaming two-year-old in the highchair.

A gust of wind blew through the house as the front door swung open and closed again with a bang.

"I'm home!"

"Daddy!" Lucy shrieked joyfully and ran out to greet him. Catching the girl up in his strong arms, the father grinned and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

"How's my little Lulu doing today?"

"Mummy made chocolate chip cookies!" said Lucy, an eager gleam in her big blue eyes.

"Did she now? Mmm, they smell scrumptious," he added, breathing in the smells of chocolate and vanilla that filled the house.

"Uh-huh. She told me to guard the cookies to make sure you don't eat too many."

"Your mummy knows me too well," he chuckled. "They are my favorite."

"She even tubbed me a Knight of a Mose Noble Order of the Cookie with her rolling pin!"

He blinked and adjusted his glasses. "Susan did what?"

"She tubbed me a Knight—"

"...Of the Most Noble Order of the Cookie," finished Susan, grinning and wiping her floury hands on her apron as she came out to greet the two of them. "And it's 'dubbed', Lucy; not 'tubbed'...and thank heavens, a knight in shining armor at last." A fresh outburst of screams and tears emitted from the kitchen and she sighed wearily, rubbing her temples. "Warren, your son is being impossible."

"Oh dear." He leaned over and gave her a lingering kiss. "Does my fair maiden need to be rescued and swept off her feet?" he whispered.

"Yes she does," said Susan, a whiff of aftershave and cologne brushing her senses as she kissed him back.

"Ewww, stop kissing!" Lucy wriggled in his arms and made a face.

"It's our anniversary and I have every right to kiss your mother," said Warren, making a face back at his daughter and giving Susan another long smooch to prove his point.

"It's gross!" protested Lucy. "Eww!"

"Oh go run along and wash up," laughed Susan, taking the disgusted five-year-old from Warren's arms and setting her on the ground. "Dinner's almost ready and Mrs. Bennet will be here soon to look after you. Go on, shoo."

"Okay, but--eeep! No more kissing! Gross, gross, gross," Lucy chanted as she covered her face and flounced to the washroom.

Warren grinned and took Susan in his arms.

"GROSS!" Lucy yelled from the bathroom.

"I just hope she keeps thinking that until she's thirty." Warren whispered. Susan giggled and pecked her husband on the cheek.

He suddenly gave her a bemused look. "And since when has there been a Most Noble Order of the Cookie?"

"Since I made it up," she said, trying hard to keep a straight face. "And it is a serious matter."

"Is it?" His brown eyes twinkled as he pulled her closer. "Then I'd like to be a Knight of the Cookie, too."

"Maybe later, bookworm," teased Susan, batting his nose and turning to go upstairs. "But for now, I am otherwise occupied."

"Fine then, Phyllis. A happy 7th anniversary to you, too..."

"Oh shut it." Susan turned back and threw a dishtowel at him. "We have to leave in two hours! You should be getting ready, not pining after cookies and knighthood."

"I don't need two whole hours to get ready," he said, neatly catching the towel and raising his eyebrows. "Unlike some people."

Susan held up her chin and sent him a queenly glare. "Then do your beloved bride a favor and tame the two-year-old dragon while 'some people' make themselves presentable."

"Your wish is my command, darling Susan!" He swept her a dramatic bow and strode past her into the kitchen, whistling a cheery "Rule Britannia".

His wife rolled her eyes, chuckled to herself and ran her fingertips over the smooth, wooden banister as she made her way up the stairs. She closed the bedroom door behind her and rummaged through her closet, half humming to herself.

"I wonder if this still fits me..." She took out a glamorous dress of red satin and held up against herself as she looked in the mirror. Gazing at her reflection for a moment, Susan smiled.

She could never have guessed that seven years ago, today, she would be married to that nerdy kid she met at the train station...


A/N: Oh yes...I would like to thank H. Max Marius (Cherokee) for helping me with this first chapter! Thanks so much, Cheeky! You've been a great help and encouragement to me!

And if you readers would be so kind as to leave a review and let me know how I'm doing with this or if there's anything I could improve on...gosh, I'd love you. And no, not all of this will be fluffy. Some parts will get pretty angsty...but after all, you have to get through the angst before things can get happy and fluffy, right? :-)