JK: Just something that spawned as a real event between me and two friends, Cast being me - Itachi, Mii - Deidara, and another friend - Hidan. I hope you all enjoy, 'cuz I had fun writing it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.


"Oh, God."


"Dei...Dei...I don't think this is how we do it."

"Ita...come on. This is SO how we do it, un."


"Come on, man, there's nothing to it."

"Says you."

"Aw, come on! Don't make everything so complicated, un! It just goes in here!"



"OOOPS?! That's an understatement!"

"Sorry, let's see if we can get it back out."

"Agh, damnit..."

"Okay, I'm gonna try twisting it, okay?"

"I don't know."

"Okay, well, here goes."



"DAMN! That hurt WORSE!"

"I said I was sorry!"

"God! Ow!"

Back downstairs, a few curious member peered up the stairs. If people were having sex, they kept the doors closed so no one could hear it. That's the reason Leader had jutsu'd the doors.



"Damnit...Someone get up here!"

A silver-haired male stood up.

"Fuck this shit..." Hidan mumbled, storming up the stairs.

"Ow! Hidan, thank God."

"Whoa, you guys are in some kinda mess, aren't you?"

"Understatement, un."

"Okay. Let me see what I can do."

"Ow! Ow!! HIDAN!!"

"What the fuck else am I supposed to do?!"

"Hidan, that does NOT go there!"

"Well, EXCUSE ME for trying to fucking help!"

"Here, let me try, un."

"NO! YOU got the damn thing stuck in there in the first place!"

"Let me give another fucking try..."

"Uhhhh! Uhhhhh!!"

"You okay, Ita, un?"


"Okay...let's see...did you twist it clockwise, or counterclockwise?"

"What does that have to do with anything?!"

"Just answer the fucking question!!"


"Try counter, then. I'll help."

"Okay...okay...good, it's easing out."

"Good. Okay, now...are we gonna need some kind of lubricant or something to get it out the rest of the way?"

"I think we got it."

"Okay,'s out!"

"Thank Jashin. Okay, here my next question, why the fuck did you BUY that, Itachi?!"

"I thought it would be interesting! I didn't know it would give me this much hell to get it in!"

"I thought you would at least know how to use it!"

"I thought so, too! I've seen people do it tons of times!"

"I have, too, un."

"Hang on...okay. Hey, Hidan?"


"Wanna blow?"


"You wanna blow it? I mean, you did help us."

(a sigh)

"Alright, give it here..."

At that, Kakuzu, Kisame, and Sasori went up the stairs to investigate.

"What are you guys-" Kakuzu began, and then stopped.

Hidan was holding a clarinet, Itachi's finger was bleeding, and Deidara had a manual on his lap.

"What?" Itachi asked, shrugging.

"What were you guys...?" Kisame began.

"The idiots were trying to put a fucking clarinet together. Deidara just closed the headjoint on Itachi's finger." Hidan shrugged, and attempted to play said instrument.

"Why?" Itachi asked, a mischevious glint in his normally emotionless eyes. "What did you THINK we were doing?"



JK: LOL, I was bored. This was the run-down: I had two friends over, and I was trying to put my flute together. It was a little sticky from God-knows-what, and the headjoint wouldn't go in right. So, Mii offered to help me get it on right. We got it on, but he got some of my finger skin caught in the flute. My other (male) friend came in to try to help us. The conversation was pretty much the same. Hehehe. Have a nice day, everyone!