All right, here it is, guys: the chapter you've been waiting for me to bring back for ages. I've condensed the first two parts and added on the ending. The funny thing is that it was convinient for me to wait this long. You'll see once you read. :)

Once again, these errors are my own.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I own NOTHING!

Bloody Mary

The little reindeer had invited all of his friends to stay for the night. He had been very excited as his friends had arrived and come into his home. By now, it was already 11:48 pm and, naturally, everyone was telling scary stories. All of the lights were out as the flashlight was passed around in a circle as they told of frightening events. Chopper shivered slightly and wrapped his blanket tighter around himself. His eyes had practically bulged out of his head when Nami had told of angry fishmen that attack children at night. He had been excited, but now he was just getting freaked out.

"Okay, Zoro, it's your turn," the teenage girl said, satisfied with Chopper and Usopp's trembling. She turned to the Zoro and knocked him on the head, instantly waking the boy up.

"W-what is it, Nami?" he asked-or rather demanded-feeling very annoyed.

"It's your turn, Zoro! " she yelled at his face, roughly shoving a flashlight in his hands.

"Oh yeah, you're still doing this thing," he muttered to himself as he grabbed the flashlight from the sweet, docile orange-haired girl.

"Zoro, tell a scary one!" Luffy screamed in excitement as Usopp, who was sitting next to him shivered slightly.

"I agree, it should include great portions of blood spill and violence," Robin added.

"Don't make it that scary. I-I think Chopper's getting scared." Usopp looked at Robin like she had grown a second head. His own voice shook as he said this, but Chopper nodded in agreement.

"But that would take all the fun out of it, wouldn't it?" Zoro said as a dark smirk spread on his face. He then looked up, expression turning pensive as he pondered what story to tell.

"Hurry up, Marimo," Sanji said, beginning to get annoyed.

"Shut up, dartboard-eyebrow!" the green-headed boy spat back, but before a fight could ensue, Nami interrupted.

"Just hurry up and tell the story!" Nami yelled with rage at Zoro. It was a complete shift in mood as she turned to Sanji with an innocent expression. "Sanji-kun, could you please-"

"Thought of one."

"How dare you interrupt the beautiful Nami-swan, you idiotic-"

"Sanji-kun, be quiet please," Nami warned, but turned to Zoro as she spoke in a demanding voice. "Tell the story."

Zoro shined the flashlight under his face as the others had done…before he fell asleep, anyway. "They say that there is a creature so hideous, so disgusting that you'd become blind just by looking at it. Said creature also is known by other titles such as 'Princess of the Dumb-ass Kingdom.' It's capable of disguising its appearance easily, but it does have one flaw in this disguise. It has a vortex that is unexplainably positioned where its eyebrow should be," Zoro said, suddenly shining the light straight at Sanji.

"What the hell, you damn Marimo! Besides, wasn't it supposed to be prince instead of princess-" He quickly cut himself off and shook his head, as if to clear it. "Maybe you should take a look at your own ugly mug and-"

"Who the hell are you calling 'Marimo?' What are you-"

"Shut up!" Nami said, knocking out the two who had already assumed fighting stances. She quickly took the flashlight from Zoro and dropped it on Sanji, who was still knocked out. This action apparently revived Sanji as hearts replaced his eyes. Zoro followed suit and woke up, returned to where he had been sitting, and promptly fell asleep once more.

"Hai, Nami-swaaaaan!" Sanji responded like an obedient puppy. "Should I tell of the two gorgeous beauties that are-"

"Just tell a scary story, Sanji," Nami said with a tired expression.

"Of course, Nami-swan," Sanji responded, calming down a bit. He then turned the flashlight to himself and cleared his throat.

"There once was this anime of a pirate crew-"


"SHUT UP, LUFFY! Anyways…this anime grew quite famous and was really, really good. As a result, dubs were made in other languages. Some went good, and some went bad. However, the most horrible dub was the English one made by an evil company called 4KIDs, whose CEO and chairman was a man known as Alfred Kahn. In the dub, there was no blood, no violence, no guns, no smoking, and not even cleavage! It was-"

Sanji soon found himself on the floor with a huge bump forming on his head as Nami stood above him. She quickly took the flashlight from Sanji and handed it to Robin. "Robin, it's your turn now."

"All right," Robin responded, already having a story in mind. "This is a story that could involve some participation, actually." Robin then shined the flashlight under her face.

"Oh, Robin, I wanna do the parcititating!…parlitcating…pir-" Luffy was soon cut off by Robin.

"Participating. They say that there was once an attractive young woman named Mary who had a baby boy. One day, someone took her child from her while she was distracted at a market. She searched for him desperately all day long, but she could not find him. When she returned home, she found the head of her child, which had been torn off and attached to the wall with a knife. His decapitated body hung from a rope off the ceiling. Most say that the woman went insane and killed herself. Now, she wants revenge for what happened to her infant. Supposedly, when one stands alone in the dark in front of a mirror and chants 'Bloody Mary' three times at midnight, she appears…and kills the one who summoned her in an exquisitely painful manner. It's known as a test of bravery."

"R-ROBIN, HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT WHILE GRINNING!" Usopp screamed, shaking in fear, as he looked to the woman who seemed untouched by the alarming tale. Chopper huddled closer to Usopp and wrapped the blanket even tighter around himself as he trembled in fear as well.

"So, Luffy, you said you were gonna do it, right?" Zoro asked, who had somehow woken at some point throughout the story.

"Eh? No, I said I was gonna particitate, but I'll do this too!" Luffy answered, not understanding.

"Luffy," Sanji began, who had by now recovered from Nami's blow, "that's what participation is. When you offered to participate, you offered to go do this whole 'Bloody Mary' thing."

"It's 11:58, Luffy," Nami stated while glancing at the clock on the wall. "Remember you have to do this at midnight."

"Do what?"

Nami hit Luffy on the head. "Haven't you been listening!" she yelled. "Get in the bathroom, say 'Bloody Mary' three times-"

"They say that saying you killed her son out loud can also help," Robin commented coolly, as if she were discussing a salad recipe.

Nami blinked twice at this but continued. "It has to be at midnight too. Luffy, if you're gonna do it, do it now. You only have one minute left!" There was no time to discuss the matter; thankfully, however, Luffy wasn't exactly patient.

"Okay!" Luffy said, and then jumped into the bathroom with the lights off.

"You have ten seconds, Luffy," Nami announced, closing the door on him as she began the countdown. She was standing outside the bathroom door.

"Nine…" Chopper shook with along with Usopp. They were both a safe distance away from the bathroom.

"Maybe this isn't such a good idea guys," Chopper said, beginning to worry about Luffy.

"Relax, Choper, it's just a myth," Sanji announced from where he was next to Nami. Just a myth…that's what they all thought.

"Five…" Zoro was leaning against the wall near the door, ready to go inside in case anything happened. Not that anything's gonna happen.

"Four…" Robin was also standing somewhat close to the door, curious as to what would happen. I've never seen someone actually do this.

"Three…two…one." Nami took a deep breath. "It's midnight, Luffy!"

"BLOODY MARY, BLOODY MARY, BLOODY MARY," Luffy yelled loudly, recalling what his friends had instructed, "I KILLED YOUR SON!"

It's just a myth, right?

Luffy looked around the small bathroom in boredom. He placed the candle Robin had gave him on the counter. It gave the half bath a dark and eerie glow.

"Hey Nami, nothing's happening. Can I have some Doritos now?" he called out.

He waited for an answer but none came.

"Naaamiii! I'm hungry!" he yelled a little louder.

He waited a couple more seconds. It had already been well over a minute, and nothing had happened. Luffy glanced at the mirror one last time, only to find his own reflection staring back at him.

He twisted the handle, discovering that it wouldn't open. Nami had locked it.

Luffy knocked on the door. "Nami! It's been more than a minute! You can let me out now!"

He huffed and jiggled the handle.

It clattered to his feet. He stared unintelligently at the knob on the floor, not understanding why it had fallen off. He hadn't even pulled it.

He bent over, feeling blindly for the handle on the ground. What had happened to the candlelight? Luffy straightened after having found it, scratching his head.

"Hey Usopp, I think I broke your door!" He dropped the doorknob on the counter and realized the candle was out.

He looked at the door once more, having missed a lack of movement in the mirror. Thankfully, the boy did a double take, and stared at the mirror.

His reflection was gone completely, not that he would have seen it very well in the darkness. But it wasn't just that. There was something in place of his reflection.

Or more accurately, someone.

A woman looked back at him intensely. Her light amethyst eyes held an icy look to them, and her ebony hair contrasted greatly to her pale face. The young woman wore a beautiful wedding dress. Her carmine lips parted as she-

"Hi! My name's Monkey D. Luffy." Luffy grinned widely. "Do you know where I can find Bloody Mary."

The woman's expression faltered, but she soon returned to her cold look. "I am Bloody Mary, fool."

"Oh….IN THAT CASE, AM I GLAD TO SEE YOU!" Luffy exclaimed. "NAMI LOCKED ME IN HERE AND WON'T LET ME OUT! Now that I've seen you, maybe she'll let me eat."

The woman looked at him quietly, her head turned slightly. Her small mouth opened the slightest bit, before stretching to frightful proportions, a horrifying scream emanating from him as she lunged at Luffy.

"LUFFY!" Nami pounded harshly on the door. "I SAID YOU COULD COME OUT, IDIOT!"

Zoro and Sanji neared, only to be growled at by the fiery girl.

Nami kicked off her fluffy slippers and charged at the door, kicking it down with surprising agility.

Wide eyes stared at her with caution from all around. All but Robin seemed afraid. Nami muttered something unintelligible and flicked on the bathroom light. Cabinet doors slammed open and shut. Usopp and Chopper stiffened as they heard a gasp.

"He's gone!"

"What do you mean he's gone?" Zoro demanded, rushing forward with the others in alarm.

"Luffy isn't in here…he's disappeared!" cried an irritated Nami.

Chopper screamed, crying and running around in circles. Usopp shook violently, hiding behind a pensive-looking Robin. Sanji seemed to be taken aback, as did Zoro and Nami.

Nami's brain began to function once more, the gears turning gingerly in her head. "Okay, there has to be a reasonable, rational explanation to all this, right Robin?"

"Maybe, Nami…of course, there's also the possibility that he's been viciously mutilated and murdered by now…or that-"

"ROBIN, I WANTED SOME COMFORT HERE!" Nami bellowed, holding her head in frustration.

"Well, there is also the possibility that Luffy's in the mirror with her."

"He's what?" Sanji asked, puzzled.

Robin took a seat in the living room, the empty bathroom still in clear view. The others joined her, sitting in their circle-one person short.

"Luffy is probably still alive. There would have been more of a mess if Mary had murdered him. They say that sometimes Mary takes someone in the mirror with her. Some say that she takes them to her world, the Spirit World."

"The Spirit World?" Chopper scooted closer to Usopp, as they tightened the blanket around themselves.

"It's a world parallel to ours inhabited only by spirits," Robin elaborated. "I'd bet that's where Luffy is.

"How do we get Luffy back?" Chopped asked, eyes still glazed over with tears.

"We have to summon Bloody Mary."

"Eh, you sure can get your mouth open far, but I can do better." With that said, the grinning boy miraculously produced a ham from his pocket and shoved it into his mouth, bones and all.

The disfigured woman shut her mouth, floating above Luffy. She then contorted herself, her jaw breaking off as a snake-like tongue lolled out. Her eyes began to seep red fluid, and an unearthly shriek left her lips.

Luffy swallowed his meat, looking at her in confusion.

"Hey Lady, you're pretty, but not when you make those faces."

The woman suddenly stopped, shrinking back to her normal form and reattaching her jaw.

"You…you think I'm beautiful?"

Luffy didn't seem to notice the pink flush across her pale cheeks.

"Yeah." He'd said it like one would agree that bananas are yellow.

The woman swooned, snapping her fingers. They were suddenly in a classy restaurant. Her worn wedding dress had been replaced by a sleek evening gown with an especially low cut neck. Luffy looked down at himself and saw that an expensive suit had replaced his outfit.

He was confused, but not very bothered. That probably had something to do with the large amount of meat on the table. Luffy quickly began vacuuming it up, only pausing after consuming no less than three full chickens.

"Eh, how did we get here?" he asked between bites.

The woman giggled, her cheeks still blushing. "Here? Do you mean to this point in our relationship?"

Luffy stopped halfway through a steak. "Relationship?"

The woman squeeled, hearts taking place of her eyes. "Ah! So you do acknowledge it! I knew it! So when are we having the wedding?"

"What wed—"

"I'll invite all of our closest friends. I've had my maid of honor chosen for centuries. Do you have a best man yet, darling?"

Luffy placed his hands before him. "Wait, lady, I don't even know your name…and I don't want to get married."

The woman stood, leaning back to place her hand before her face. "Oh the shame! How could I have forgotten to tell you my name? I am Hancock, Boa Hancock." She batted her eyelashes as she resumed her seat. "What," she began coyly, averting eye contact, "is your name?"

"Monkey D. Luffy."

"Oh, there has never been such a beautiful name! Luffy! Could this be? Is this…TRUE LOVE?"

Luffy continued shoveling his food, not too preoccupied by the woman before him. He quickly cleared the table.

"Oi, is there any more meat?"

"What's this? His first come on! This has to go down in my diary!"


Hancock was too distracted in her love daze to notice Luffy's ever-present state of confusion. At last, something he said interrupted her mental wedding planning.

"Where are my nakama?"

"What's that, sweetie?"

"My nakama, they were with me before I went in the bathroom and met you."

"Oh, the bathroom! That room shall forever be known as our meeting place!"

All of a sudden, a cell phone rang. Hancock sighed before reaching into her pocket and answering.

"What?" she hissed. "…Now? But I'm busy!...Argh, all right, I'll be there soon." She turned to Luffy. "I'm sorry, darling, but I got a call from work. I'll be back in a sec."

She snapped her fingers and disappeared. Luffy blinked, but then spotted the restocked table of food.


"Nothing's happening."

"She realizes that, dumbass."

"What did you call me, shit-brow?"

"Oh, I think you heard me, you damned marimo."

"Marimo! I'm going to kick your a—"


The group gasped as a beautiful woman appeared in the mirror. She looked to be impatient, her hands on her hips and a scowl on her pretty face.


Nami silenced Sanji with a smack to the head, which made him noodle dance in joy, but it was thankfully silent joy. She then turned to the tall woman, her hands shaking as she spoke.

"Your excellent Bloody Mary, we summoned you because we were wondering if you'd seen our friend, Luffy."

The woman's expression changed into one of enlightenment. "You're Lu-Lu's friends, aren't you?" She reached into her pocket, pulling out several intricately decorated envelopes. "I'm guessing that you'll all be at the wedding, right? Well, the color scheme is purple and the decorations inc—"

"I'm sorry, Mary, but did you say there was going to be a wedding?"

Hancock placed a hand on her hip. "Ugh, don't call me Mary; that's only for work. My name is Hancock, and I'm going to be the future Mrs. Monkey." She jumped up and down at the idea of it.

Zoro spoke up, suspicion covering his features. "Why the hell would Luffy marry you? What've you really done with him?"

Hancock looked at him in rage, and snapped her fingers, causing Luffy to appear beside her with a turkey leg in his mouth.

"Eh?" He blinked. "Hey guys! You're back!"

Nami slapped her forehead. "No, Luffy, you're back. You're the one that was gone."


"Silence! Lu-lu, tell them of our love! Tell them we're getting married."

Luffy looked at the eyes on him. "Yup."

Zoro choked in surprise. "'Yup?' Luffy, why would you want to marry her!"

Hancock leaned backward, looking down at them in a spectacular manner. "Why, you ask! It's because I'm...beautiful!"

Luffy shrugged. "She gives me meat."

It's convenient that Hancock was created. :) I'm fairly sure you've all heard of Bloody Mary, so there isn't a need to explain its origins.

Also, how would you guys feel about my writing a multi-chapter story? I'm currently considering it. If I do write it, it'll be written over Christmas break and chapters would be posted periodically. It would be a completely separate story from OPHS and would probably center around one OP character in an AU.

Please review! It'll make me joyous! -Paris potato pizzas for you all- -that seems oddly delish, TheDML =3

Dear Furry Potaters,

I won't let you in on just how happy I am that you updated, only because I don't want to seem desperate like Hancock. I am a (wo)man of refinement who knows when to play hard to get. Next chapter I'd like for (ONE PIECE CHARACTER OF YOUR CHOICE HERE) to have more air time, as I am a hardcore (OP CHARACTER) fan.

Your pizza toting pal,

(Your name here)

PS - How do you feel about french fries?