Of course, this is a bit Janto-y, as all my fics seem to be
This is set before Cyberwoman and has probably been done hundreds of times, so I apologise
As he cleared another empty mug away from Gwen's desk she didn't even look up from her paperwork. Not even a glance or a murmured thank you. He felt the dull sting in his gut of resentment. He had been a researcher at Torchwood One for god's sake! And here he was in a dingy base playing butler.
He knew he it was his own doing- he did suggest the job description after all- and he was doing it for Lisa. His gorgeous Lisa who had been mutilated by those horrible metal… things. This was all for her. And for her he could cope with no recognition for his efforts. He could be invisible. In fact it would help his cause. Go unnoticed and they wouldn't suspect.
But he didn't want to be invisible. He wanted to laugh with them. And talk with them. And fight aliens with them. And love them. No, not them.
"You need to find someone else."
Lisa had told him that a while ago. Part of her was joking, but her eyes were pleading with him. Telling him to go and be happy and live his life. But he didn't think that she meant while she was still alive.
So why couldn't he stop glancing at the Captain? He could feel guilt clawing at him when he even thought about his feelings for Jack, and it made him feel sick. So why wouldn't it stop? Why did he still feel that little jump inside when Jack smiled at him?
Why did being invisible hurt so damn much whenever he thought of Jack?