Things have ceased to matter to me anymore; family, school, money, books… even friends; especially Jacob.
Jacob used to be my sun; my shining light. When he was around, I could breath. It no longer felt like I had emphysema, just a mild case of asthma
But that all changed the night I went over to his house to "help him fix up the bikes…"Flashback
I made my way down the stairs and into the living room. My dad was still sleeping on the couch and he had his feet hanging over the edge; I decided I would let him sleep in.
I was pacing back and forth impatiently in the kitchen, waiting for Jacob to call when the phone rang. It took me a minute to pick it up because, in my hast to answer, I tripped over a corner of the throw rug that lay on the middle of the floor.
"Hello?" I answered breathlessly.
"Bella," he started with an odd sense of relief in his voice. I didn't understand it but before I had time to ask, he continued. "Would you like to come over today? The bikes are almost done and if we finish them early enough, we'll have time to ride."
This bit of news excited me. It had been along time since I heard his voice and I was becoming impatient. I also wanted to break the promise I made to him-it was still too hard to think his name-as fast as I could.
"I would love to come over Jake." I heard him breathe out as if he'd been holding his breath while waiting for my answer.
"When can you come?"
"Is now okay?" I didn't feel like being cooped up inside the house all day.
"Now's perfect." The same urgency and relief flooded his voice once more. I didn't understand why it would be such a relief for me to come over, especially when I see him almost every day anyways. The only time I don't see him is when he's spending the day with Quil. I was going to ask him about it, but I changed my mind; I would find out about it soon enough.
We said our goodbyes and then I got out a pen and a piece of paper to write Charlie a note.
Going to Jacob's. Be back later.
That should suffice. As long as I was hanging out with Jacob, my dad would be happy.
I got into my truck and started the engine; my dad was definitely awake now.
I made the fifteen-minute drive to La Push in ten minutes; I was in a bit of a hurry. When I pulled into the driveway, I was surprised to see Belly leaving with Harry Clearwater.
"Hey, Bella!" Billy exclaimed. "Harry and I are going fishing with your dad. We won't be back until it's quite late."
Good, I thought. This will keep Charlie distracted an I won't have to worry about being caught.
"Okay, I'll see you later." I wanted them to leave as fast as possible; not because I didn't enjoy their company, but because I wanted to finish the bikes as fast as I could.
When I got into the house, it surprised me to not find Jacob. I decided to check the garage; he'd probably already started. When he wasn't there, I went back to the house.
He must have fallen asleep while waiting, I thought.
I burst into through his bedroom door, planning to scare him awake, but when I jumped on the bed, it was flat. I turned around to see Jake hiding behind the door with an evil smirk on his face. He then shut and locked his door.
I was very confused. "What are you doing, Jake?" I asked him. I tried to stay calm, but my voice was a little shaky.
"Helping you get over Cullen." When he said the name, I felt the hole in my chest throb; he knew that subject was off limits!
It was then that I comprehended the meaning behind his words. "What do you mean?" I tried to play dumb but I knew he saw right through it.
By now, I had made it off the bed and was slowly backing away from him; it did me no good. In three long strides he was across the room and had me pinned to the wall.
"You know exactly what I mean." He breathed these words into my ear. When I tried to get away, he held me tighter and looked at my face; he looked angry now. "It's time you get over Edward!" I cringed at the name. "He's not coming back and I'm right here. I know you can't see it now, but we're perfect for each other. Hopefully this'll prove it to you."
He then crushed his lips to mine, trying to force them open. He succeeded and stuck his tongue down my throat. He ripped my shirt open and threw my on his bed. While he was taking off his shirt and pants, I screamed for help. It was no use, though, because their closest neighbors are two hundred feet in every direction.
I couldn't scream for long anyway because Jacob was on top of me and covering my mouth with his. I don't remember much else; I blocked it out.
When he was done, I got dressed. Before I left he told me to never tell anyone about what happened or he'd hurt Charlie. He also said that I had to continue visiting, otherwise someone would get suspicious. I left after that and got into my truck. When I got home, I went straight to my room and cried until I fell asleep.End of Flashback
It's been a month since that happened. I've continued to visit for fear that he would someone I love if I didn't. He's made this threat more clear by explaining to me that he is a werewolf and can do much more damage than any regular human being. Even though they're only supposed to fight vampires, that won't stop him from doing something drastic.
Charlie has become more worried about me as of late. Even though I can't tell him about it, I can't hide the hurt look on my face every time he mentions Jacob. He doesn't really understand; now that Jacob's my "boyfriend", I should be happy. It should mean I've moved on, right? Wrong. Very wrong.
I still love him with all of my heart and soul. I loathe Jacob for hat he's done and is doing to me. I do appreciate what the rest of the pack as done for me though. Without them, Victoria would have gotten me by now; Laurent would have gotten me by now.
"Bella, have you listened to a word I've been saying?" Charlie pulled me out of my reverie when he said my name.
"No, Dad, I'm sorry. Could you please repeat it?" I lately haven't even been trying to be non-zombieish around Charlie. The only reason I'm still alive is for him and Renee.
"I said I'm going to Seattle for a few days and you'll be staying at the Black's." I looked at him, shocked. I couldn't stay there with Jacob; who knows what he'll do.
"Dad, I'm old enough to stay home alone. I am eighteen." My voice was full of urgency that I hoped Charlie wouldn't hear.
"I know, but I figured you wouldn't want to be home alone."
"Well, I do." "Okay, it's settled then. I'm leaving as soon as we finish dinner. You'll need to call the Black's, though, to tell them you're not going." My dad almost looked happy I wasn't going. It was probably because he didn't want me spending the night at my boyfriend's house.
I got up and put my dishes in the sink; then I grabbed my dad's. When I was finished washing them, I decided I'd procrastinated enough; I needed to get this over with. I knew he wouldn't be happy, but there was no way I was sleeping over at Jacob's house.
As the phone rang, I made one last wish that Billy would answer, but alas, I have no such luck.
"Hey, Jake." This is going to be difficult. "I'm just calling to tell you that I won't be coming to your house tonight."
"What? Why not?" He sounded both surprised and angry.
"Because Jake, I'm a big girl now who can stay home alone." I probably shouldn't have said that, but I couldn't help myself.
"Fin, then. I'll come over there." He said this through his teeth.
"No, Jake. Don't come over. I'll see you tomorrow morning."
Before he had time to protest, I hung up on him. I would probably pay for that later, but I have all night to prepare myself.
After Charlie left, I locked all of the doors and windows. The only one I left open was my own, and that was purely out of habit. I knew a lock wouldn't keep Jake away if he truly wanted to get in, but that's all I could do.
When I was finished brushing my teeth, I crawled into my bed and fell right asleep. I was dreaming about the night Jacob did what he did to me, when I woke to a knock on the window. I was kind of surprised; Jacob doesn't usually ask for an invitation into my room. I went over to the window to open it up and that's the last thing I remember.
Author's Note: I know you people don't like cliffhangers, but I couldn't resist. If you review, though, I post new chapters faster!!