Chapter 26 : An Ending

And so we're done ! In the beginning I thought of making this two separate chapters, but then in the end I didn't want to chop anything up, and I didn't want to waste another two months making separate chapters, either. I've felt attached to this, but I had no choice but to finally sever the ropes. After all, there really is no end in the world of pokemon. xD Until the end of August, though, Axy is done with school, yay~ It's weird, because the day I'm posting this up is the last day that I had school. xD I'll have a lot of manga to read, and fanfics to both read and write. (Since I now know at least three r-l people who are registered on . ^.^

But anyway, this is the end. I doubt if I'll ever do another sequel to this. The plotline would be extremely complicated, and there'd be too many characters for Axy to wrestle around and make them into breathing individuals. Nevertheless, I enjoyed working on this series for the time that I did, and hopefully my warped sense of the pokemon world influenced at least one person. (Well...that'd probably be me, so I guess the joke's on everyone. xD) After this I have a bit more space to work on my other in-progess fanfic, PKC Abridged, some oneshots that will inevitably pop into my head at random, and a lot of German learning. I'd like to thank everyone who's reviewed or favorited this, and maybe in the future I'll write another extremely cracky fic similar to this one. Let's face it, though - ya can't get much crackier than this. XD Enough of my reminiscent rambling, though. I'll let you read, and enjoy or laugh and snicker or whatever the hell you guys do.

Oh, and btw. The last line in the chapter makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. It's based off of Naruto Abridged, and I just threw it in there as a parting thought. xD

" Hey, hey, hey ! "

Max watched in horror as Misty chased Ash around with her newly-acquired mallet of DOOM # 2. Bought by a wandering street peddler, the wooden tool seemed to have more powerful qualities than the confiscated mallet of DOOM. It sliced the air with a nice whooshing sound, but it wasn't very helpful when Max wanted to silence the large group and not hear screams of terror. Ash's group was the last to arrive, but there came an immediate rush of chaotic fuel. Despite wanting to see him, Misty's line was crossed when Domino was dragging the boy from the car. It wouldn't have been a big ordeal had not Shelly teased her with kinky innuendo, accusing Ash of being a dumb runaway Romeo and Domino a jazzed-up Juliet.

Thus, the blind mallet chasing.

Ash jumped over a bush. The attempt was futile, and Misty swung her weapon over the boy's head. He howled and felt the growing lump appear before falling flat on his face. Domino, Gary, and Oakley started to snicker at the sight, then burst into a fit of cackling as Misty kicked him in the stomach. Giovanni ignored his son's pleas for someone to help, holding Pikachu with a pair of rubber gloves. Meanwhile, Delia gawked at the boy and clicked her tongue. " This wouldn't have happened if you just changed your underwear, honey. You know what I've always said - trouble's right around the corner if you don't wear fresh tightie-whities. "

Laughter turned into a full-scale riot. Everyone who had tried to be polite and not laugh, including Jasmine, was cracking up at the mother's statement. Ash flopped around the ground, punching the dirt in an effort to stop the commotion. " Mom, could you just give it a rest with the underwear ? "

" You know how underwear is an important structure to an important family ! " Delia snapped. " I'm not about to raise a dirty yellowbelly ! "

" But Mo- "

" Your father was the same way. " She furrowed her eyebrows, looking at Giovanni. " Could never get him to change his underwear. Could barely get him to put on his damn pants ! He spent half the time at work, half the time lazing around the house like a bum. "

Giovanni dropped Pikachu and rose from his seat. " You know very well that I only did that because I was wasted and sick and that one jealous mailman shot me in the foot ! "

" Forget the mailman ! "

" You know I'll never forget the mailman. Buns of steel, remember ? "

" D-How was I supposed to know that Spencer was working as a mailman ? "

" I dunno, Delia. How was I supposed to know that he was working his buns of steel to you ? "

" What ? "

" You heard me right. "


The man fell over to his side, groaning. Delia proceeded to sit on him. She gave a warning glance to Ash, telling him to change his underwear by the end of the day, or else. Noting the silent demand, he decided to nod and Misty beat him to a pulp, if she wished to do so. Fortunately for him, Misty crouched down beside him, rustling his messy hair. " I'd hurt you more, but I think I've got it outta my system. And I'm sure Max wants to move with his plans, so it's best to stop. "

(Shelly) " That's not what Juliet said. "


Misty pulled back out her mallet of DOOM # 2 and proceeded to beat Ash into a pulp. The rest of the group cheered, waving pieces of cloth and their hands around in spirit. Horrified, Max scouted the mass for anyone who was keeping a straight face. No one except Ai and Sherry managed to do that, and Max crossed over to join them.

They were sitting under the tree, the hedgehog taking her usual place on Ai's head. Beside them were Caroline and Chuck, laying facedown in two thick blankets of rope. Max stepped over the villainess and her boyfriend and took a seat next to his friend. He sighed and pinched his glasses. As usual, the pokemon was making an empty rant about something.

", I don't think in my entire years of existence have I ever met someone so stupid, dense, and in bad taste of hair style, " she babbled, snuggling against the nest of hair. " I mean, how does he not know that just about every scrawny stick he meets has a thing for him ? "

"...Um, Ai, do you think you could ask Sherry to do a favor for me ? "

Ai's glance looked hopeful, but before she could respond the Shaymin hopped onto Max's head and hung upside-down to face him eye-to-eye, hedgehog to human. " Ask Sherry yourself, Shortstuff. Don't be intimidated by my awesome speeches. What do you want ? "

" you think you could get it so I can talk to everyone without any interruptions ? "

" I'm not going to kill them all just because your robot parts are screwy, kid. " The hedgehog somersaulted to the ground and went back toward Ai. " You think I'm some sorta god just because I have shape-shifting powers and I can use my vine whip for about thirty different uses. Well, you're wrong. I can get into a lot of trouble. Arceus may be a crab-ass, but he gets angry when deities are zooming around the mainlands trying to zap people with their given powers. Wonder why Dratini are only pseudo-deities ? They did something to Atlantis. Something bad. They were turned into an entire cave of Magikarp for years in Blackthorn City until he finally turned them back to normal. And most of 'em aren't even right in the head anymore. I remember this one little serpe- "

" I don't think Masato-kun means that, Sherry-san. "

" Suuure he doesn't, " Sherry chuckled. " You know you mean it, right, Max ? A person can only stay sane for a short time before letting themselves go psycho cyborg. "

" No ! "

" Fwhehehe...fine, I'll shut them up. Just remember me when you make your laser beam more lethal. I don't need no frickin' lasers zapping at me, I've had enough of that vengeance crap. "

A powerful Solarbeam was launched at Ash, nearly destroying his pants to a crisp. It was at this point that everyone decided to shut up and listen before it was more than just pants that made a casualty.

Five minutes later the entire group sat around in a giant circle, with Caroline and Chuck parked near the middle. Max sat on a stump in the center, shuffling through a notebook. Everyone waited as he reviewed the material, scribbling and erasing notes with a mechanical pencil, as if he was in a trance. Ash scratched his burnt pants, glowering at Sherry. The hedgehog acted as if nothing was wrong and that she never almost killed him with a Solarbeam. It was another ten minutes before the little boy would start his speech, and when he did everyone stood attentive and half spaced-out.

" So, um...ladies and gentlemen. " Max scratched his head, allowing dandruff to escape its nest. Half of the group sweatdropped. " Sorry. You know how procrastination runs in the family. But anyway, we finally completed our mission. It took a lot of hours, and I'm pretty sure we upset a lot of people, especially Group One, but we did it. "

" Yay, us ! " Molly cheered.

Ash rolled his eyes. " I know we didn't piss off a lot of people. Just because we're reckless doesn't mean we're reckless all the time. "



Conway pulled the girl away from her target while Misty snatched back the mallet of DOOM # 2 away from her possession. Once Molly was back to her spot and Ash mumbled that he was okay, Max continued. " Well, Phione and Sherry are in safe hands, and as we can see, the Culinary Cherry and her front-man minion are detained. That concludes this mission as a whole group. " He opened up his notebook. " However, we still need to assure that justice will be served, although frankly, we won't need everybody. Currently we are of twenty-four - nineteen humans, three morphs, and two unmorphed legendaries, along with all of the other pokemon. I figured we could cut back a third of this. Obviously, those who maintain a gym are probably needing to get back to that gym. So, Whitney, Jasmine, and Winona, after this you'll be relieved from your duties. Roxanne, you are also relieved, and I'm sure Conway will tag along when you leave. "

" Pro'lly. He's your brother. "

" Annie and Oakley, you ladies can go, too. I know you two have your own lives. "

Oakley grinned. " Back to the thrilling ride of a con-artist. Awesomeness. "

Annie frowned. " Hey, I think I forgot to bring our pokemon with us. Ariados and Espeon must be hungry by now. "

" . . . mewdammit, Annie. "

Max sweatdropped. " Our last relief is Shelly. I dunno where you came from but you can leave. You're kinda a bum. "

Shelly snorted. " Yeah, I knows. Ain't life grand, Maxie-pie ? Just like one freakin' merry-go-round. "

She walked into the forest, wandering off into the deep end like the best of former commanders. Max's sweatdrop grew bigger. " Um...'kay, then. Now that we have that settled, I'll allow anyone to leave voluntarily. It's been a long journey for all of us, and I know that some of you may be tired. So, who wants out ? "

Mortimer cleared his throat. " Us legendaries have been talkin' it over. I mean, little dude with the dorky glasses, it's been a helluva fun time travelin' with Mr. Van Man and his awesome son and all, but we do have a responsibility being deities. Common sense, dude. I know that Phione and I are going for sure. Dunno 'bout Marvin and the others, though. "

Mewtwo groaned. " Enough with the crap, Mort. " He turned to Max. " Look, Maple. Rai and me will be going, but I have some business to deal with first. Hedgehog's on her own. "

" 'Kay, dude. "

Max nodded. " All right, then. Sherry ? "

Sherry shrugged. " Guesso. I need to keep up my dominance with the other Shaymin. "

" Okay. Anyone else ? "

No one responded. The boy shut his notebook. " Then it's adjourned. We'll be heading for Viridian within a couple of days. It's been nice working with you all. "

Their numbers were diminishing. After saying their farewells, eight of the thirteen leaving were already parted and onto their separate ways. This created a slight hole in the group, but it couldn't be helped. Lives were complicated, places had to be maintained, and the art of conning gullible policemen had to outlive the art of the gullible policeman's innocent work.

However, there were some difficulties among those farewells.


May hovered over the pink-haired gym leader, clutching onto her skirt like a chick. Whitney was equal in her grief, wailing the blues of a mangy sheepdog. The two girls, joined with a giant bear-hug, were trying to be pulled apart for time's sake. On one side Gary and Tracey were attempting to pull May off without touching any sensitive spot. On the other side, Jasmine was wrapping her arms around Whitney's waist and trying to pick up her friend. Surprisingly, that method seemed to be more effective, as Whitney was heaved a few inches off the ground. Nevertheless, the hug remained intact despite the gym leader being airborne. May's strength could be compared to that of an Onix, and Whitney's grip was frightening.

" Whitney, I don't like doing this to you, but the trains are going to leave soon and we need to get on them ! "

Jasmine pushed up on her comrade's chest, making a heavy gasp come out from hiding. Whitney shook her head, kicking her legs back and forth. Black and blue marks would eventually appear on Jasmine's scrawny legs, but it couldn't be helped. Her friend was oblivious to anything besides holding onto May a little longer. " I'm sorry, Jas, but a farm girl's gotta stick with her kin ! It's ungodly to abandon at a time like this ! "

" No, it's ungodly that two bimbos like you can manage to fight us off for this long ! " Gary snapped. " Now let go and let the squeaker take you home ! "

" No ! "

She pulled herself toward May again. The brunette let out a sob. " We'll never let anyone come between us. You're like the big sister I always wanted and then Max was dropped on his head ! "


They stumbled backward, crashing into Tracey. Swirlies in his eyes, he had no choice but to relinquish his grip before he ended up becoming a casualty. Gary growled, tightening his own grip to make up for the loss. Women never ceased to surprise him. " Dammit, woman, you're gonna have to let go sooner or later ! This is no time for your hillbilly horseplay ~ "

A hand flashed from out of nowhere and smacked Gary with a cruel force. His hold on May disappeared, and he fell back into a tree, swirlies regaining their utmost power. This allowed the two girls to take advantage, and with one more brute kick Jasmine was knocked to the ground. Whitney finally let go, glaring daggers at the boys. " You ain't referred to me as no hillbilly ! " she hissed. " I'd like to see you try to get away from the mainstream culture and ride on Miltank all day ! City slickers ain't got no respect for the country folk, ungodly cretins. "

" City slickers ? " Gary repeated. " My town's made up of nothing but houses and forest ! We're so small that we don't even have a school ! We had to commute an hour to Viridian City just to get a public education ! I got mauled by a wild Dodrio when I was five ! "

He pulled up his shirt, revealing a claw-shaped scar. Whitney snorted. " That's nothing. I was rolled and stomped on before you were even born ! "

" I'd like to see you to be raised by an old man who started to go cuckoo at thirty ! "

" Hey, insanity rolls in my family ! Three generations of demented genes ! "

" Four, and I've been neighbors with Ketchum for all my life ! "

Whitney's glare faltered, and she rubbed her elbows, letting out a sharp exhale. May pat her hands on the girl's shoulders. " You can't let someone like him beat you ! "

" I'm sorry, hon, but I can't beat being neighbors with the Ketchum boy. That whole family needs holy water sprinkled on 'em. "

She shook off May's touch and turned to Jasmine with a little sigh. " I guess we should be going and partin' ways. Uncle Milton must be havin' a hard time controllin' all those Miltank. I hate leavin' a fellow sister, but sometimes we gotta take responsibility. We'll see each other again, May, darlin'. Don't ya worry. "

" Okay..."

Jasmine grabbed Whitney's hand and they left, going to a path where they'd be separated from the rest. May sank to her knees, letting out choked sobs. Max approached the group, looking hesitant. " Do I really wanna know ? "

Gary rolled his eyes. " 'Course not. "

Meanwhile, on the other side of the group, the situation was more tolerable but just as depressing. Unmorphed and uncovered, Mewtwo knelt besides a teary Ai. Surrounding them were Rai, Sherry, Ash, Delia, and a reluctant Giovanni. It was hard leaving a group when someone's psychic energy levels threatened a region's safety if things spiraled out of hand. Things had to be handled delicately, and unfortunately Mewtwo wasn't the delicate fellow. With a lump in his throat, he remembered how a Gardevoir almost killed him shortly after he started to live independently. She had half the power that Ai wielded, and yet she managed to blow up three buildings and an entire neighborhood's worth of mailboxes. Arceus was obviously not too happy. If the situation went wrong the piece of land they were standing on would become its own continent. The land land of withered plants and loony people, that would make a great postage stamp.

He pawed through her long hair and sighed. It was always him who handled the most difficult scenarios. Maybe that had to do with the curse of the clones.

" You're spacing out again. "

Mewtwo shook off his reveries and snapped to attention at Ai's voice. He cursed himself for not guarding his thoughts again. " Huuuh. Okay. This was a very tough decision to make, Ai. Rai and I spent hours thinking this through. "

" Yeah, I spent hours thinking while you went out and got loaded at the pizza place, " Rai snorted. " Oh, the agony. "

"...We decided that you should live out your life with your cousin and his dysfunctional friends, " Mewtwo finished. " As a normal human being. It's hard for all of us, but Rai and Sherry and me have a responsibility to protect the world from people like Mr. Ketchum and alien space-people...and junk. You know how it is. "

Sherry leaned against Ai, rolling her eyes at Mewtwo. " Yes, like alien space-people and junk. Dork. " She stuck out her tongue and patted Ai's ankle. " We have vacations, just like any normal human. Pokemon festivals and religious ceremonies. Christmas and New Year's. Mardi Gras we get so freakin' wasted that we end up waking up on balconies and roofs. We'll visit you, Ai. Go on a rampage across Kanto, maybe joyride in a couple of shopping carts. Can't offer ya a martini 'til you're twenty-one, though, kid. Meh. Another couple of years and you'll be ready. "

Ai giggled. Delia wrapped her arms around the girl and hugged her. " And we'll have a good time when they're away, sweetie, " she stated, grinning. " I'll get a whole bunch of boxes of cookie dough and comedies for us to use. Raw cookie dough tastes good on a rainy afternoon. "

" Woman's trying to kill us all with her evil baking, " the hedgehog murmured.

Mewtwo chuckled. " See ? You're in decent hands. The only way you'll die with them is from eating evil pastries. And like Sherry said, we'll come to visit. Besides, " he unleashed a wide grin, " you'll have others to spend your days with. "

He pointed to Max and Molly and cackled. Giovanni mumbled something about needing another tent. It was a couple of minutes before Ai burst into a bigger fit of giggles. " Okay, okay, I'll stay with Auntie and Uncle and Ash and Molly-chan and Masato-kun...and Pikachu ! "

" Geez..."


Giovanni reached for his stomach. Mewtwo picked up Sherry and patted Ai's hand, standing up to depart for a different lifestyle. He tossed a Snickers bar to the little girl. " Just remember, Ai, that life is indeed wonderful. "


" Wait a minute...Myuutsu, this has nuts ! I'm allergic to nuts !..."

(Two weeks later...)

It was a normal day in Viridian City. As usual, the streets were packed with busy people, and traffic was bustling and jammed with ignorant drivers. Already two pedestrians were injured while crossing the street, and an elderly woman lost her walker to an SUV. Flying about ten feet into the air before crashing into a brick wall, that walker never had a chance. Officer Jenny would later go searching for that walker, tired and distressed. Since more than half of the criminals were mere pickpockets, the police force had been reduced to this. A team of low-life officers and their deputies searching for old ladies' decapitated walkers. If silence was golden, then the sound of metal and plastic crashing were like Chimecho bells.

Across from the mangled walkers was a tall, grand building with the Kantonian flag waving on its lawn. Clean-clipped, violets blooming on the side, dew drops sprinkled on their tops. No child dared to cross the lawn without an adult. The violets would be stomped on, and a stack of penalty fines would be thrown at someone. Last time someone stepped on the violets, 150 dollars had to be dished out on the plate. That was the notorious power of the Viridian City Courthouse.

Inside, the building itself lost no aspect of its serious atmosphere. There wasn't one floor where a lawyer or a judge was absent. Many of them were on their breaks, eating sandwiches or taking drinks from unmarked flasks. Most of them didn't care to deal with business, although a few did carry their cell phones. The art of law was indeed exhausting, but nothing could compare to the featured case, People from all of the major regions scampered for a seat in the audience. Even being a juror would do, anything just to get a looksie at the event.

/he people of Kanto and Hoenn vs. Caroline Maple and Charles Beech.

Gathered and seated in the two front rows, the jolly group waited for the hearing to commence. In the back were Gary, Tracey, Max, Molly, and Ai, all dressed up in ironed shirts, slacks, and ties for the men. The front row consisted of Ash, Domino, Giovanni, Misty, and May, who were all exhausted yet thrilled to see a possible showdown. It was five minutes to showtime, and Ash was getting restless. He turned to Giovanni and scratched his head. " I can't believe Mom got into jury duty. I thought she hated Mrs. Maple. "

" Your mother's an excellent con-artist, " Giovanni whispered, " and she managed to get us these seats, so be grateful that she's doing that boring job. "

" . . . Dad ? "

" What ? "

" If Mom ever tried to hook up with another gym leader behind your back, what would you do ? "

Giovanni let out a chuckle. " Who were you thinking of ? "

" Mr. Lt. Surge. He's been staring at Mom all day. "

" I'LL KILL H I I I M ! "

Gary and Tracey pulled the man back into his seat before he could manage to maul Lt. Surge into shreds. A few seconds later, a judge in his black robes graced the room's presence. He twirled his gavel a few times, whistling a random tune before hopping into his seat. The audience sweatdropped. Judge Noname rolled his eyes in response. Some people just didn't know how to loosen up. " We are here for the case of the people of Kanto and Hoenn versus Ms. Caroline Maple and Mr. Charles Beech. The accused party is here for human endangerment, illegal possession of firearms, and at least one count of first-degree murder. Ms. Maple, I'll allow you to make your opening statement. "

Caroline stood up and pushed on the table. She looked at the judge, glanced at the jurors, and grinned at Delia, who was ten seconds away from meeting her own mauling issues. Seeing this made the grin grow wider, and the woman let out a small giggle. " Heh, it's been awhile since I've stood in a courthouse, my apologies. " She pursed her lips. " I see that a lot of accusations have been made upon me, but I have to defend my innocence. We are of just a normal group triying to get through with our lives after the dismal tragedy of my husband, Norman. End of statement, Your Honor. "

" OBJECTION ! " Delia exclaimed, knocking her neighbor's steaming coffee into his lap. " She was selling herself months before Maple got his ropes cut ! "

" Oh, and you think you're so innocent ? " Caroline retorted. " I heard noises coming from the bathroom just before sitting on that bench. I wonder why Mr. Ketchum's tie is so loosened. "

" At least he has a tie ! "

" ENOUGH ! " Judge Noname banged his gavel, glaring at Delia. " You do *not* object to something when you're in the jury ! "

" Didn't say that in the manual..."

" NO ONE READS THE MANUAL ANYMORE ! " Judge Noname roared. " Miss Ketchum, keep your mouth shut until needed. Mr. Beech, make your statement. "

" My only statement is that if anybody calls me Mr. Beech again, I'll rip their tongue out. It's Chuck. "

Judge Noname sighed. " All right, then, Chuck. Your preference has been duly noted. I'd now like to proceed to both sides of the case. Mr. Unknown, you may present your side. "

A short, clean-cut man took out a stack of papers and began projecting his dull voice out to the crowd, shuffling the papers as he spoke. He made brief, meaningless gestures with his hands, pretending that the world was his oyster when in reality most of the people were spaced-out. Domino pulled out a set of earphones and plugged them into her iPod and ears, tuning into a classic 90's pop song. Ash ripped out one of the earphones and took a quick sound-check while the girl glared at him. He made a face as " I saw the sign " rolled into his hollow noggin. Scrunching up his nose, he threw the earphone back to Domino, oblivious to the lawyer's gawking. He had stopped his pacing to stand right in front of the boy. Misty was quick to nudge him, and he scrunched up his nose again. " Don't tell me you're into that type of music, too, Mist, " he groaned.

" No, the lawyer's staring right at you ! "

" Oh. " He looked up to see Mr. Unknown meet his confused one with an irritated one. Domino started to snicker. A long pause was held before Ash scratched his head. " Uh, who are you again ? "


A few minutes after a briefcase was thrown across the room and Mr. Unknown had to be apprehended by three officers, Judge Noname decided to just let the defense present their side before something burned. Calm and collected, Caroline took the stand. She was very serious, her hands folded in her lap while the jury wrote down notes. During the entire time, Delia kept her eye on the villainess. Something wasn't right, but obviously she couldn't say anything for fear of the powerful taser gun.

Soon Chuck was also brought to the stand, and with primitive speech and grunts he b. his way through the interrogation. Judge Noname listened to his tales with a great reluctance. No one except Delia saw him pull out the poison-tipped needles. With a grunt she hopped from the bench and tackled the big man, creating gasps from everyone. The judge banged on his gavel to silence the crowd, but Delia was quick to interrupt. " Check his hands, Your Honor, check his hands ! "

Chuck threw the needles to the floor before the bailiff could check his hands, but now everyone could see the failed assassination. Delia glanced at Caroline and smirked, enraging the woman into a complete 180. " Chuck, you stupid idiot ! " she howled. " You absolutely cannot do anything right, you dumb, big block of f-king sh-t ! I can't believe I'd trust you with something so complex as this ! "


The man jumped form Delia's hold and stormed down half the room before four men tackled him and put a pair of ankle-cuffs on him. Judge Noname boomed out that both of the accused would go away from thirty years to life. Someone grabbed Caroline and ushered her and her partner out of the room while the place erupted into cheers, particularly the two front rows. Delia grinned and flashed a victory sign as she skipped down the aisle and punched Giovanni in the arm. " Heh-heh, we did it ! "

Giovanni grinned. " We're having pizza and warm heating pads tonight ! "

" Yay~ ! "

Ash paled and turned to the back row. " And this will be your first experience at two lunatics having kitchen sex where we eat our breakfast. " He placed his hands on Ai's shoulders. " Run for your lives. "

Everyone started another round of giggles, and the group would soon be back to a life of normalcy, or as normal as things got in the land of Kanto. Soon more adventures would be made, more of them half-planned than brilliant. Things may not get better, but times would be much more enjoyable. And Tracey would finally get a new mustard bottle, we'd never know.



As the end credits started to play, Lucas and Mondo rode across an unmarked territory with their bicycles, similar to that of wandering trainers. Lucas pounded on his fists as he saw the last name roll up the imaginary screen. " NUUUU ! WE'VE GOTTA MAKE THIS ! WE CAN'T FAIL ALL OUR PLANS NOW ! NUUUUUS !..."

"...Saaaandwiiiiich. "

" Shut. Up. You dirty flirt. "