This is probably gonna be our last chapter, aside from a possible sequel, along with the Zack/Reno back story. Some things we wanted to clear up:

* Dirty white board style: SS came up with this in response to a thread on the Shadowbox, which said that anything could be turned into a sexual position. She started looking around her classroom and decided that, "The dirty whiteboard" sounded the best for a sex position.

* Weiss/Nero lovers: MAD PLUGGING: If you loved Weiss and Nero in this, check out our other serial fanfic/parody of Beauty and the Beast.


"Would you quit holding my hand while we're out here?" Cloud Strife glared daggers at his boyfriend. "Just because we're all official now doesn't mean I'm ready to display it to the public, okay?"

"Alright, alright…" Zack Fair ran a hand through his hair and sat down on a park bench, staring up at the sky. "Gawd, it's getting to winter already. Ugh…"

"Yeah." Cloud sat down next to him, dropping his bag carefully on the ground in front of him.

They sat in silence for a few minutes until Zack opened his mouth. "Hey… Cloud…"


"I got something to confess…"

"If you say you're really straight, I'm going to kill you."

Zack smiled. "No, nothing like that. It's just… Ya remember our first time?"

Cloud looked up to the slate-grey of the sky. "Nope."

"… Our second time?"

"Why, yes, I do recall that." Cloud's tone was loaded with sarcasm.

Zack probably would have continued the joke if the topic at hand wouldn't make Cloud so angry. "Well, you made me wrap it and all, right?" Cloud nodded. "Well… It broke while it was in you."


Zack knotted his fingers into the hair behind his head. "I knew this would piss you off."

"Piss me off!! Zack, why don't you tell me these things!?"

"I just told you. Besides, you dragged me right down to the clinic the next day. And a week later. And just last week, actually. You realize we're backing up their mail system."

Cloud narrowed his eyes. "AIDS latency periods have been known to be years on end. Just because we're not covered in scabs or sick or whatever…"

"You're aware they don't look all that different? Just sicker? Besides, the tests came back negative. You're safe." There was another pin-drop-worthy silence. "You still don't trust me, do you?"

"I trust you. I just don't trust your other boyfriends."

"Reno and Genesis?"

"I don't even know Genesis and Reno's a sleaze."

"Is not."

"Is so."

"Is not."

"Is so."

"Settle down, kids." Reno dropped an arm between them. "What are we even talking about?"

Cloud and Zack looked at each other. "Nothing."

"If that test in the mail is positive, I'm not going to let the disease kill you, I swear to God."

Zack opened the letter with a pushpin. "You're so romantic, Cloud," he said flatly. "Really, you spoil me."

"No, really, I'll kill you myself."

Zack's now very trained eyes scanned the paper. "Then put away your knives. You are, for the third time, HIV and AIDS negative."

"Good." For the first time that day, Cloud finally seemed to relax and collapsed onto their couch. "What's for dinner?"

Zack looked at him. "Have some ADD… Uhm…" He bent down to examine the contents of their refrigerator. "Spoiled lettuce?"


"Sour cream?"



"Gawd, just say we don't have anything."

"We don't have anything," Zack chirped before flopping onto Cloud and calling in for Chinese. The people knew who it was the second he said hello, knew precisely what he wanted and where it was delivered to. Consequently, Zack knew the exact price.

"Usual time?"

"Yep. We've got twenty minutes." Zack rubbed his nose against Cloud's. "Just enough time to get all sweaty and intimate."

"No." Zack pouted. "I just want to cuddle, okay?"

"You're such a girl, Cloud. I love you."

"I'm a girl." Cloud sat up, outraged, and flipped Zack under him. "Who's the girl now?"

"You're right. I'm sorry."

Cloud shut his mouth with a kiss and stayed quite fused to him until the delivery girl showed up with their food.