Disclaimer: I do not own Enchanted Arms, Red vs Blue, or The Matrix. My most valuable possession at the moment is a pack of 60 pieces of gum that was $4.00. Yes, that is a rip off, but I was desperate.
Atsuma and the others were walking through a high security underground place. They walked up to a door. It opened, and closed when they were through. They walked up to another door. The same thing happened.
This continued 15.6 more times until eventually the very last door decided not to close when they were past it. Atsuma walked towards it. He pulled out a screwdriver and started trying to fix it.
"Atsuma, we're going to be late for the filming!" Makoto whined. Atsuma proceeded to ignore him and continue trying to fix the door. Everyone was about to leave, when suddenly, Atsuma got the door to work. Unfortunately, the people who designed the doors didn't think to include the idea of a person standing in the doorway when it closed.
As a result of this, Atsuma was trapped in between the door, which started to repeatedly slam him. Worse, one of his high tech gadgets that never made it into the game fell loose, hit the floor, and fired a high voltage electrical rod into his cheek.
The result was that every door, light, and electrical device on the same circuit as that door instantly shorted out, leaving them all in darkness. Luckily, Atsuma was able to punch right through the door, and light a fire in his hand to light the way. Luckily, the studio was not shorted out. They instantly noticed the figure in blue armor by the director.
"Before you ask, I'm going to explain it to you. Raigar filed a restraining order, so Atsuma cannot be within 50 feet of him. Therefore, we have decided to replace him with Michael J. Caboose from the popular web series, Red vs Blue. And yes, he will NOT try to kill Atsuma." Atsuma did a small victory dance.
"Um, I just realized that I forgot to memorize my script…In fact, I don't even remember getting a script. In Red vs Blue, I pretty much just went along with what everyone else was doing. Church always gave me a glass of orange juice when I got it right."
"O…kay. Ish. Don't worry, we wrote the script at the last minute anyway. You'll probably improvise something better than what we came up with. Just don't do anything stupid."
"I've seen Red vs Blue, and that might be a problem." Toya stated.
"I hope it isn't a math problem." Caboose replied.
-Blooper 1: Atsuma bunking with Raigar/Caboose-
"Well, that was pretty cold how they made you sleep in here. And they didn't even give us any food!" Atsuma said. Suddenly, a rat scurried by. Atsuma lunged at it with a fork.
"Dinner!" he yelled. Caboose promptly stopped him from killing the rat. With a sharp salute, the rat continued scurrying to safety.
"Don't kill the rat! It might have friends to help!" he said. Atsuma just stared at him. He quickly decided not to pursue the matter further.
"So, I guess it's time to go to sleep." Atsuma said, ready to hit the hay. Caboose, on the other hand, had other ideas.
"But you haven't read me my bedtime story yet!" he said. Atsuma simply stared at him as if his gray matter were pouring out his ear.
"CUT!" the director yelled.
-Scene where Atsuma and the others accuse Raigar of being gay-
"I thought that women didn't interest you!" Atsuma said.
The random elf, just to be different, chuckled. He was quickly shooed away.
"Well, a lot of things interest me. Orange juice, cookies, bedtime stories." Caboose quickly ran out of fingers to count on. Everyone just stared at him.
"We're accusing you of being gay, which wouldn't really be possible, since you get Sayaka pregnant at the end of the game." Atsuma stated. The others, realizing that the scene was already dead, decided to grab some popcorn and watch the action unfold.
"Well, maybe you should explain how sex works, just in case there's someone here who….doesn't…maybe, know how it works?"
"Oh my GOD. Why did we hire him, again?" the director moaned.
Makoto, not wanting to be outdone, groaned.
The director moaned.
Makoto groaned louder.
The director moaned louder.
"ENOUGH WITH THE MOANING AND GROANING! IT'S STARTING TO GET CREEPY!" Sayaka screamed, and promptly stormed off the set.
"Well, great! All of her scenes were planned today! What are we going to do now?" the director said.
"Um, actually, I have an idea." Caboose stated.
A contract signing later…
"What was I thinking?" the director moaned, looking at Tucker. Caboose had apparently known another of his friends that could help them. What he didn't tell them was that he was a GUY.
-Brief intermission after fighting the Queen of Ice's first form-
"Show it to her!" Karin yelled, referring to the ice magicore that would save Toya from being destroyed.
"Yeah, show it to her! Bow-Chika-Bow-Wow!" Tucker yelled from off-set. The director promptly ripped all his hair out and needed immediate medical attention. Because of this, all scenes for the day were stopped, and the bonus scene was cut out.
Or at least, it should have been. Atsuma apparently decided to film it anyway.
-Bonus scene: EX Stun Bead Flare-
"Reduce them to ash!" Atsuma yelled, and took a moment to enjoy the pride he felt whenever saying that line, for it was the coolest EX line he had, in his opinion. Mega Phoenix sounds kind of gay, and Force Pain was kind of cliché. Unfortunately, at that very moment, he screwed up.
Instead of delivering that final punch, he tripped and fell fist first onto the ground. When his fist connected with the ground, a huge crater was formed, and hot air rushed upward, blowing Atsuma upwards. At that very moment, Neo from The Matrix happened to be flying by, and was thrown upward as well. They flew upward, stopped in midair for a moment, and then proceeded to begin falling again. Neo was happy to fly away and be safe, but Atsuma was, to put it briefly, hospitalized for the next three days.