Chapter 1: Cold

Chapter 1: Cold

The lives that people see portrayed on the TV sometime represent the ideal that most wish for themselves. Even I, who knew the true story allowed myself to get caught up in the mystery and romance of two people. As I watch, my heart breaks repeatedly at the lies that I allowed the world to see. I think that maybe its time people knew the real story of Sailor Moon. Maybe they should know the reality between the sappy lines and corny smiles that I gave to the camera. Shouldn't they be enlightened as to the price of love? Shouldn't they know the real me?

Serena stared down at her milkshake. After only a few months with Darien, she had changed. Not many people could see this (if any at all) since she did everything she could to hide behind the ditzy nature of her early teens. Immature is what they described her as. Darien's friends made it no secret they thought her too ambitious for her own good. And maybe she was. But what did it matter? What did any of it matter? She stirred the drink slowly before taking another sip. Even it had lost it flavour to her. Now five years later, she greatly wished she had let him die. Even as he thought it, she knew it was a lie.

She struggled to remain happy and obtuse for her friends. Normalcy was what they required in a life that constantly put them into danger. She was their normalcy. She sighed heavily and she felt his eyes on her. She was pretty sure he thought she was bored with just sitting there but in truth, she was relieved. It wasn't often she was allowed the pleasure of just sitting in one place. Youma attacks were more frequent than snowflakes in winter storm these days. Thankfully, she was out of school. College or university was not an option for her but she didn't pass up the opportunity for online education. She might hate school but she knew the value of education. She felt his eyes return to his books and she breathed easier. Life would have been easier if I never found you. She thought. If I never found out.

Darien was a constant in her life and she had to live with her decision. It had been the happiest day of her life when he finally stopped picking on her and asked her out on a date. Of course, finding out she was the moon princess and the love of his life catapulted them into a relationship that, at the time, she thought she wanted. Now, she knew she wanted it. What was obvious to her, however, was how much he detested the very thought of her.

"I'm going for a walk." She announced.

"Where are you going?" he said.

"What does it matter? It's not like you actually care." She said easily and stretched. He glared at her and she smiled.

"You're my girlfriend. Of course I care."

"Darien, I'm too tired to argue with you now. Maybe tonight when you want to have sex we'll argue." She said. She back pedaled when he stood. She wasn't afraid he'd hit her but his height intimidated her. She hadn't grown much through the years in the height department.

"A princess should watch her tongue." He warned.

"And a boyfriend should at least like his girlfriend." She fired back.

"You need to get over this romantic notion about relationships." He said. "We're together because that's how it has to be. I'm to be king and you my queen." She noted the possessive word he added before queen and glared.

"You're queen? I'm anything but your Darien. You made it pretty obvious I'm an arm ornament that you wish would fall and break." She grabbed her jacket and made for the door. He wanted the last word. He always wanted the last word. He slammed her up against he door and breathe din her ear.

"You'll show me some respect, little girl." He said. He took great comfort in holding the age difference over them. At first, she thought she was lucky a guy Darien's age would look at her. Now she wished that Selene hadn't blessed her with her unearthly good looks. It seemed to be the only thing that he could put up with when it came to her.

"Let go of me, your highness." She ground out. He kissed her roughly, bruising her lips. She could have spit at him but she wasn't raised that way. Plus, it didn't help that she loved him as much as he hated her. Maybe more.

"Be back by six." He said and walked off towards the bedroom. The room that they shared every night for the past three years. She yanked open the door and slammed her way out.

"Stupid, egotistical pig." She muttered as the cold wind nipped at her collar. "Thinks he can rule me." She said angrily to herself. We'll see about that.

At the park – where the youmas seemed to love to attack – she thought about where her life was headed. She sighed as he allowed her anger to be replaced by the grief that threatened to eat her alive. She was in love with her boyfriend. And he hated the air she breathed. Her heart thudded heavily against her chest. Things had been bad before her profession to him. It made her heart hurt just to think of it.

"Darien?" she called out to him during one of their bouts of sex.


"I-I love you." She said softly. He stilled. Thinking he was about to repeat the gesture she opened her eyes to take in the sincerity of his words. A burst of laughter stilled her sensual writhing and she blinked up at him.

"Y-ha ha ha- you love me?" he crawled of her and continued laughing. "This is just priceless." She watched in shock as he dialed a number then related what had just happed to one of his cronies. He put it on speaker so she could hear a bunch of his friends laughing in the background. Shock turned to despair and she allowed the tears she had been holding back for so long to wash away the hope of him feeling the same.

Her heart clenched. Even before they had sex, he had treated her like trash. Stupidly, she had thought that giving herself to him physically he would like her better. To have her love thrown back in her face in such a cruel manner had decimated her belief in the possibility of requited love. Too bad it hadn't killed her love for him. She sighed heavily. To the outside world, they were the ideal couple. Affectionate, caring and completely in love. Even her friends congratulated her on not messing things up. Like she could. She snorted at the thought. At home, they fought constantly and had sex just as much. She swallowed bile at the thought of her weakness. No matter how he hurt and humiliated her, she shriveled up in pleasure when he touched her. When he kissed her. Even the smoldering, knowing looks made her tingle. Her life was hopeless.

Not for the first time, she wondered what her life was like back on the moon. She wondered if he had been the dashing hero everyone made him out to be. Was he the lover she dreamed he was now? And she wondered how she could find out. She slapped her forehead at her stupidity.


After tracking down the cat, she begged and pleaded for her memories of those days to be returned. Luna refused over and over again. She was adamant that the past was the past.

"What don't you want me to know?"

"You know everything we need to know."

"Maybe there is something in my memories that the history books left out."


"Luna!" Serena said commandingly. "I order you, as the future queen of the moon to restore my memories." She had asked nicely but Luna was her guardian, advisor and subordinate. She hated pulling rank on the cat but she needed to know. She cat stiffened visibly then bowed her head.

"As you, your highness." She said stiffly. Her golden crescent lit up and shot a beam out connecting with Serena's own crescent. Immediately memories flooded her. She hadn't expected so much at one time. She closed her eyes and thought hard at what she wanted to see. Images of her and Darien swam up before her and she smiled. They were smiling, laughing and behaving like a normal couple should. She sough tout their private moments and her heart slammed heavily against her chest. Her eyes flew open and Luna had her head bowed respectfully. It was just like now. Nothing had changed. Darien – or Endymion – was the cold heartless bastard then as he was today.


"Yes, your majesty?"

"Luna." She said again. Luna looked up at her. "W-What did you think of me and Darien back then?"

"From what I can remember, you were in love. Happy. Willing to die for each other." Serena realized then that nobody knew how unhappy she was then or now. She picked up the cat and apologized for the yelling thing.

"No need to apologize."

"No. In this time, you are not just my servant, you are my friend. My mother."

"Thank you." She said. "I need to get back to Artemis."

"I'll see you at the scout meeting." Serena said then left the cat standing there.

She sorted through her memories. She smiled at the good ones and frowned at the unhappy moments. She was satisfied with her recollections so far. Pushing those thoughts to the back of her head, she headed him.

The door swung open when she made to push the key in. He was angry but she didn't care.

"I said six." He ground out.

"So what?" she pushed past him and headed to the kitchen area for something warm to drink. Her hair was damp from the light rain that had started a while ago.

"As long as you live with me, you obey me." He persisted.

As she stirred the hot cocoa she looked up at him and said. "Then maybe I should move out."

"And go where? I support you. I send you to school." She decided not to tell him about the money she had saved, invested and hidden from him.

"I'll sleep in a cardboard box for all you care." She said them sipped some of the tea.

"Don't push me?" he said angrily.

"Or what? You'll hit me? Or have sex with me?" she said snidely.

"Maybe I should hit you."

"You just try you bastard. Just lay one had on me."

"Hiding behind you senshi? My generals can handle them."

His generals. She glared at him. They had been revived by him in their former state of mind. She wouldn't force her senshi to go up against the men they loved. Even if only one of them – Jadeite – truly loved his woman.

"I can take you myself, Tux-boy."

"Oh please. If I have to go by your fighting skills, I think I can manage you." She smiled. He didn't know how strong she really was. Nobody did. She didn't even know until she got her memories back. She'd need some practice but she could kill him right where he stood if her heart could take it.

"Then hit me, Darien. Show me how powerful the prince of Earth really is." He glared at her but did nothing. She blinked when four general appeared behind him and he glanced at them.

"You are troubled." Malachite said.

"Just really pissed off." Darien said. Serena smirked at him then annoyingly sipped her tea again.

"It seems someone needs some anger management." She looked at the four men before her. "Have a good evening, gentlemen." She said walked to the living room to watch some TV.

"How you put up with her, I don't know." Malachite said to Darien.

"I wonder myself."

"We do not need an alliance in this day and age. I say dump her." Nephrite said folding his arms across his chest.

"And mess with the timeline? I saw what would happen if I don't stay with Serena." He shivered. The devastation he had witnessed was something he would prevent even it meant living with the sniveling brat for the rest of his natural life. Unfortunately, it was a very, very long time.

"Discipline her." Zoicite said.

"And have the senshi breathing down my neck?"

"We can handle our women." Malachite said making Darien glare at him.

"Maybe if you anger them and them alone. Hurt their precious Serena and they'd blow us all up."

"True." Jadeite said. "Rei has a temper that she says is mild in comparison to Serena's."

"Serena doesn't have a temper." Darien said smugly.

"Not with you." Malachite said.

"She makes me so mad." He said and the earth trembled slightly.

"Temper temper." Serena called to him. "It won't do to have you destroy the planet because you're having a hissy fit when I've been busting my ass to keep it alive." She switched off the TV and then slowly disappeared into the bedroom.

"Control her in the bedroom then." Nephrite said shrugging.

"Not a bad idea." He said. "You may go." He said dismissing them. They disappeared as quietly as they appeared.

"You embarrassed me in front of my generals." He said pushing her down on the bed roughly. She gasped. Darien had never forced her before. Honestly, there had been no need to. But tonight, she'd fight him tooth and nail.

"Don't do something you'll regret." She said as he straddled her, pushing the nightdress she had just put on up over her hips. She was calm. Maybe too calm.

"Shut up." He said quietly. Darkly. With a mighty heave, she shoved him backwards, off her and off the bed. She crawled to the other side of the bed and almost made it before her encircled her ankle and hauled back to him. He leaned down to cover her mouth but she turned her head and bit into his cheek. He yelled and reared back. She jumped up quickly and made it to the other side of the room.

"You stupid cow. You shouldn't have done that." He said touching the already bruising area.

"I'm gonna sleep at Lita's tonight." In a flash, she disappeared before his eyes and left him in shock.

"When the hell did she learn to do that?" he said deciding to get some ice for the bite. He'd heal by tomorrow evening. And then he'd make her pay.

Two days later, he still had the bruise and Serena still hadn't come home. He visited Lita and she was practically crackling with electricity.

"The only reason I'm not frying you nasty ass for what you tried to do to Serena is because she asked me not to. I suggest you leave here before I change my mind."

"You'd threaten your king, Lita?" he said smugly.

Lita laughed lightly. "My king? Please. You don't deserve her. I answer to her and her alone. I am not of your planet, Terran. I am Princess of Jupiter, subject to the moon."

"You will respect me."

"I will respect those who are respectable. You are a pitiable form of man. You degrade the very nature of your species. Now leave my home. And tell your dear general Nephrite he and his kind are no longer welcome in my presence."

"A bunch of emotional females. That's all you are. This universe will dies at your hand."

"Better ours than you tyrannical pond scum. Be very careful how you treat my princess, Endymion. Mayhap she surprise you." He turned on his heel angrily and left.

He tried Rei's house and got the same treatment except she singed his hair. She was always the most loyal to Serena. He noted that she didn't ban Jadeite from her home. She had sent him on his way with a word though. "It's a shame Jadeite has to answer to your sorry excuse for a man. Even more shameful he has to be associated with your kind." She spat at his feet.

Ami was a little more civilized but he hadn't even gotten in the door. When he arrived, she was arguing with Zoicite and he was wondering what he had done to make her angry. She shoved the much larger man out of her apartment into the chest of king and closed the door with a resounding slam.

"I get the feeling this is your fault." Zoicite said the left Darien to brood.

Mina was on a rampage when he got to her house. Almost every piece of glass had been shattered and Malachite was frowning heavily. "I suspect your little bunny paid Mina a visit."

"I guess."

"She tied to thrown me out of my own house."

"And you let her?"

"I'm still here, aren't I?"

"Is she still here?"

"She moved out. Much to my relief. She had move din without my consent."

"I see she deiced to leave a mark."

"I need to clean up. Let me know when you find her."


He found her at the park on the swing. "You miserable little whore." He whispered in her ear. She didn't jump like he expected.

"I'm only a whore in your bed." She said. "What is it you want?"

"Are you happy with making your senshi's life as miserable as yours?"

"I told them that my boyfriend tried to rape me and I fought back. If they kicked out their men, that's their decision." She stood and faced him then. Unexpectedly, a memory slammed to the front of her mind and she staggered. She hugged her abdomen as she saw in her mind's eye the sword piercing her then being ripped out savagely. She coughed up a little blood at the force of the memory.

"Serena!" she heard Darien yell. She shook her head when he tired to help.

"What the hell are you doing?" Endymion yelled at Beryl. "You turned my generals against me."

"You turned against earth when you married the twit."

"An alliance was necessary!"

"But you don't love her!"

"Of course not! I love you, you stupid woman."

"Then why? Earth is powerful enough without the damned Lunarians."


"I will not play second fiddle to some brainless child." Serenity breathed heavily behind Endymion from the heavily bleeding wound. Her heart crumpled within at his words. Now she knew why he could never love her. She had hoped things would change but it was obvious she fought a battle already lost. His heart was not hers. It never would be. She shoved him aside and ran into the uplifted sword. It pierced her heart and she gasped in pain.

"Be happy with him." She said sadly to Beryl. But Beryl wasn't looking at her. She was looking over her shoulder in despair.

"E-EEndymion! No!" she shoved ruthlessly at Serenity and dove for the falling body of her lover. "Please no. I didn't mean to-"

"I told you wait. I'd have come for you." He said weakly. Serenity was already dead. "I'm sorry."

"Serena!" Darien yelled. She was bleeding and she hadn't been struck. He summoned his generals and they scouted the area fro whatever could have hurt Serena.

"Nothing." Malachite said. He was walking back toward Serena when the Senshi arrived, surround the bleeding princess.

"What the hell did you idiots do to her?" Rei shouted. Ami got busy analyzing her once she had her stretched out on the ground.

"She's not injured." Ami said confused. "What happened?"

"She just grabbed her stomach and started coughing up blood then she passed out." Darien said clinically.

"Her body-" Ami said reading her monitor. "It's dead but her mind in active. Very active. I don't understand." She was just about to check her pulse again when Serena inhaled sharply and coughed. "Sere!" Ami said.

"I'm fine." She said. She looked around and saw everybody looking worriedly at her. She figured it was more that they didn't know if it was a new enemy than being worried for her in the case of the Terrans.

"But-" Mina stared but her words were cut off when Darien touched Serena and she yelled angrily at him.

"Don't you touch me you animal."

"What did you do to her?" Rei said holding it against Darien's throat. Malachite returned the favour but Rei was pissed.

"Stand down, Malachite. I didn't do anything. Ask her yourself." Rei looked at Serena who was wiping the blood from her mouth.

"He's not lying. I was remembering something."

"And it caused this."

"Lunarians react to traumatic experiences in a frightening manner."

"What did you remember?" Ami said still checking Serena's vitals. Everything was back to normal.

"The end of the Moon Kingdom. The end of an era." She said glaring at Darien. She rose, the blood on her clothes immediately disappeared. "I know what caused Beryl to attack us." She said. "And I now know she'll do it again."


"Its only a matter of time, Endymion." She said scathingly. "Soon she'll come back and try to claim what was hers all along."

"You're talking in riddles." Zoicite said.

"Time will explain all." Via her mind link, she said to her senshi We need to see Pluto. Now. They all nodded an in a flash, they were gone.

"We've been left out of the loop." Nephitre said staring at the spot where his Amazonian princess just stood.

"Time will tell." Darien repeated trying to figure out what she meant. What she knew. "We can't do anything for now. We'll meet once they return from wherever." They all went their separate ways.