Disclaimer: I do not on NCIS. No matter how much I wish I did.
Notes: I got this idea from a Psych commercial and encouragement from Asarene to finally write my own story instead of just helping her. Constructive criticism is welcome as this is my first story but flames will be used for the enjoyment of the pyromaniac writer.
"Where is he?" McGee asked Ziva as he slammed the phone down.
"Tony still not answering his phone?" Ziva inquired looking up from her paperwork.
"No, I can't figure out what he could be thinking," replied the computer whiz. "He knows better than to be 2 hours late to work."
"He better be maimed or dead," growled Gibbs as he stalked into the bullpen with a fresh cup of coffee.
"It's not like he has never been late before," Ziva interjected.
Just then Gibbs phone began to beep. After a moment McGee gathered his courage, "You gonna answer that Boss?"
Gibbs pulled out his phone and looked at it in confusion.
"What the hell does it want?" Gibbs asked tossing his cell at McGee, as he moved around his desk to sit down. He set his coffee to one side as the began to sort through his paperwork.
"You got a text," replied McGee after fiddling with the phone for a second.
"Who would think that I would answer a whatever it was?"
"Tony set Gibbs a text?" asked Ziva in disbelief.
"Well, where the hell is he?" Gibbs demanded.
McGee froze, "It doesn't say where he's at."
"Then what excuse did he say for being late?"
"He quit," replied McGee in a quiet voice.
It was Gibbs and Zivas turn to freeze.
"He what?" Gibbs forced out.
Before McGee could reply Gibbs turned and stormed out of the bullpen and up towards Jens' office, spilling his coffee on the way down.
"He spilled his coffee," whispered McGee in disbelief as he turned to watch Gibbs stomp up the steps.
"Tony's dead," replied Ziva.
In Jen's office
Jen looked up as her door slammed open. "What's the matter now, Jethro?" asked the first female director of NCIS.
"Dinozzo quit." Gibbs ground out.
"He what?" Jen unknowingly echoed Gibbs earlier reaction. "Why?"
"I don't know. He sent something to my cellphone. McGee said it was a text or something."
"Tony quit by text? Well that saves him the concussion from the head slap," Jen replied ignoring the glare Gibbs sent her way. "There has to be some mistake. Why would he quit on his day off?"
"He doesn't habe the day off. He's two hours late."
"Yes he does. You gave me the request yourself with your reports two weeks ago."
"That still doesn't give him permission to quit," said Gibbs as he turned to leave.
"Don't shoot first, you'll regret it later." Jen told him.
"Oh, I'm going to kill him when I get a hold of him," Gibbs called back as he left the office.
"Gibbs! Gibbs, Tony can't quit! You have to get him back. It has to be some sort of mistake. Tony wouldn't leave without saying something to me." Abby's babble bombarded Gibbs as soon as he left the Directors office.
"Don't worry Abs. I'll find him one way or another," Gibbs told her, glaring at McGee as he walked down the steps toward the bullpen.
McGee flinched at Gibbs glare. "Sorry Boss, I thought maybe Tony had said something to her."
"And she wouldn't have warned us he was quitting why?"
"Right," McGee replied looking away.
Abby grabbed Gibbs arm halting him. "Why shouldn't Tim have told me?" she inquired.
"Because Tony will be back. There is no way I am letting him quit." Gibbs turned from Abby to look at McGee. "McGee, go to Dinozzo's and find out what the hell he's thinking."
"On it Boss," replied McGee as he got up and hurried to the elevator.
Gibbs turned back to Abby. "Did Tony say anything suspicious lately?"
"No," she cried. Abby was upset that as close as she and Tony had become over the past six years he had not even let her know that he was unhappy. "He never said anything. He just told me his friend from college was coming into town. Why wouldn't he tell me he was upset about something?" She turned her eyes to Gibbs. Her gaze was pleading for reassurance that she was not part of the reason for Tony's decision.
Gibbs wrapped Abby in a hug. "Don't worry. Tony does not get out of things that easily. Even if we have to drag him back kicking and screaming."
The pounding on the door woke Tony from his attempt to sleep off the previous nights fun. "Finally," he muttered to himself as he got up off his couch. He had not even taken the time to change from the previous night. Tony staggered to the door as his massive hangover got the best of him. As he opened the door he greeted his guest. "Buzz, where the hell have you been?" It was not until he looked up that he realized it was not his college buddy at the door. "Probalicous, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at work?"
"Shouldn't you?" replied McGee.
"Don't tell me Boss didn't get my request off. I gave that to him two weeks ago," said Tony.
McGee looked at Tony and saw the honest confusion in his face. He grabbed Tony's arm and began to attempt to drag Tony out of the apartment. "Come on, you need to come in."
Tony held his ground, "My friend Buzz should be coming back soon and he doesn't have a key. I need to be here to let him in."
"Believe me if you want to survive the next time you see Gibbs you better come in now." McGee said still attempting to pull Tony outside.
Tony gave McGee an odd look. "I may have never been this late before but I have been late plenty of times. Besides he can't blame me for him not reading his own paperwork. The Director even okayed my day off."
McGee finally stopped pulling and turned to Tony looking him in the eye. "Gibbs did notice spilling his coffee."
Tony's eyes widened. "Shit. What god did I piss off?" He grabbed his coat off the hook and began to pull McGee out the door. "Why didn't you say so earlier? Let's go."
Gibbs sat behind his desk attempting to work on his paperwork while waiting for McGee to return with the soon to be dead Dinozzo. The rest of his team including Abby and Ducky were spread around the bullpen. Ziva remained at her desk while Ducky sat near Gibbs both attempting to go through their paperwork as well. Abby was the only on not even attempting to act as though she were working. Instead she sat behind Tony's desk with Bert, squeezing him whenever her emotions began to overcome her. The Director remained on the catwalk just in case she needed to keep Gibbs from killing Tony.
For what seemed like the hundredth time in the last hour the elevator opened to reveal someone other than the two agents everyone was waiting for.
"What is taking Timmy so long?" Abby asked the room in general.
"It takes a while to get to Dinozzo's place especially during lunch traffic. They should be here soon." Gibbs replied without looking up from his paperwork.
Once again the elevator dinged, McGee disembarked first. As soon as he saw McGee leave the elevator Gibbs was up and storming toward the still open elevator. Gibbs pushed Tony back onto the elevator leaving a stunned McGee staring at them as the doors closed. After the elevator had begun to move again Gibbs flicked the emergency stop switch. Gibbs turned to Tony who swallowed hard at the look of anger on his boss's face.
Gibbs took a deep breath. "Why the hell did you quit? By text no less."
Tony's face became confused. "Boss, what are you talking about?"
"The text you sent me this morning that said that you quit," Gibbs ground out.
"Boss, its my day off. I haven't tried to contact you and if I did it wouldn't be to quit. I didn't think you even knew what a text was," Tony said trying to understand what Gibbs was talking about.
"McGee got it out of my phone." Gibbs replied.
Suddenly a look of understanding came over Tony's face. "Oh no." he said as he dug his phone out of his pocket. "I sent Buzz a text this morning telling him that I was going to quit and go home. We were bar hopping last night and decided to split up. Who ever was heading back to my apartment first was to send the other a text. Your next to him in my contacts. I must have still been buzzed enough that I sent it to the wrong number."
"How the hell is Gibbs next to Buzz?" Gibbs asked.
"Um.. your under Boss," Tony admitted after a couple of seconds.
Gibbs chuckled as he head slapped Tony.
"Boss it was an honest mistake, do I really deserve to be head slapped for that?" Tony asked rubbing the back of his head.
"Next time you'll send it to the right number or write something more than I quit won't you?" Gibbs asked.
"Yeah," Tony said ruefully. "At least I'm not in too much trouble."
"Oh I wouldn't say that," Gibbs replied as he started the elevator back up. "You still have to explain it to Abby and Ducky, and Abby was quite upset that you did not talk to her about why you were supposedly quitting," Gibbs told him as he left the elevator. A small smirk graced his lips as heard a quiet but emphatic "Crap!" behind him.