Zomg. I'm writing Contestshipping. Willing! I never thought I'd see the day come again. But alas, it did. It was originally going to be an epic one-shot, but it got too long and is now a three-shot.

This isn't a song-fic by the way; just based off the song "I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You" by (The) Black Kids.

The rating is for sexual situations, bit o' alcohol, and some language. What? It's an AU in which the characters are all 21+. With the exception of Max, but whatever.

Random Notes: This takes place in an alternate Hoenn region. Please ignore Drew's use of a double negative. Also, it may actually be possible to make a mule fertile with freaky science. I just couldn't think of anything else. I, too, am aware that the whole "he's a drug and she's getting more addicted" line has been used before. Get over it.

The main shippings are Contest and Advance, with side helpings of Ikari, Belle (although Dawn's name is never mentioned), Ego, Winstrate/Puny, and unintentional Respect (It's only if you want to see it that way, honestly!)

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, the song mentioned above by (The) Black Kids, or Drew's last name Hayden. I give credit to whatever Contestshipper used it first. If you're reading, hope you don't mind that I borrowed it!


Amid the blinding strobe lights and thumping dance music reverberating through the club, handsome bachelor Drew Hayden stood alone against a concrete wall, a single thought floating around in his head.

Why the hell am I here?

Chartreuse eyes gazed across the dance floor until they stopped, fixated on a blue-eyed brunette swaying rhythmically to the beat of the music.

Oh right. Because of her.

She was, quite literally, the girl of his dreams. Drew could care less if he was being cliché; lines like that always worked on those swooning fan girls of his anyway. But still, when he reached the age where he learned that cooties didn't exist and that girls were actually fun to be around, she was the girl he would dream about.

Surprisingly, Drew's luck wasn't that exceptional and of course, she was already taken. He could only stare at her from afar, watching her dance with another man. Although dance on another man would've been more appropriate. He just stood there stupidly, practically drooling, gazing at her like a piece of meat. And every time he did attempt to dance, it resulted in some form of awkward foot shuffling. Still, she continued to thrash about, body glistening with sweat.

The man grabbed her shoulders, ceasing her wild dancing before placing his lips roughly on her neck. Drew was going to be sick. He couldn't just stand there staring any longer. Drew was about to up and leave when, miraculously, she pulled away from her boyfriend and whispered something in his ear. He nodded in response, and she began to walk away, right in Drew's direction.

Panicked, the green-haired man grabbed the closest female in reach. It turned out to be a cute blue-haired girl wearing a rather short skirt. She appeared a bit young, but would do nonetheless. Drew's eyes never left the brunette as she strode across the dance floor towards the bar. She caught his eye and he winked; she simply rolled her eyes and continued walking.

Drew gritted his teeth in frustration. No girl ever rejected his advances like this! But maybe that's why he was so attracted to her…

Once the brunette reached the bar, Drew cast the gyrating blunette away from him and into the arms of the scowling purple-haired man who she had been snatched from earlier. Drew paced over to the bar and leaned on the marble countertop suavely, right next to the brunette.

"Hey May," Drew greeted as smoothly as he could manage. Which was quite smoothly, mind you.

Oh, and did I forget to mention that they actually know each other?

"Enjoying your night?" Drew continued. "It's a great club. After all, I established it."

"I was enjoying it, thank you," May replied smartly. "Until you showed up, that is. Don't you have a fan girl you could be dancing with? Oh, like that girl I saw you grab from her boyfriend?"

Drew flipped his hair, trying not to lose his composure. "None of them are really my type." Then he turned to look May straight in the eye. "Well maybe not none of them."

She simply looked away. "They seem about the same as those girls you bring home every night."

At this, Drew was speechless. Since when did May become so full of witty retorts? She was the only girl who could really challenge him, make him at a loss for words. And as much as it unnerved him, Drew liked it.

He stared at the ice chinking in her glass for a few moments before speaking, this time rather quietly. "I'm sure they're no better than Ash."

Ash… His name burned like acid on Drew's tongue. May deserved so much better.

"Ash is a great man, thanks you very much. He's… Well he's a lot of things! I just wish…"

"Wish he was a better dancer?" Drew finished.

"Well, yes, sometimes," May replied, looking down into her drink. Drew cast his gaze toward Ash, who was awkwardly standing in a sea full of wild dancers. Drew couldn't help but let out a snicker at the sight of him.

"Looks like he could use a lot of help."

"Yeah, but it isn't everything. Personality is what really matters," May said.

"I think being a good dancer should be very important to a girl to which dancing is a passion."

May said nothing, only downed the rest of her drink and slammed the glass back down on the counter. "Yeah, well if you happen to come across a guy who can dance, feel free to let me know."

With that, May stood up and left without another word.


A blue-haired girl whimpered softly as a green-haired man expertly kissed her neck.

"Oh Drew," she moaned. "I knew you were a good dancer but a great kisser too?"

"Did you ever expect anything less from me?" He grinned into the crook of her neck. Just as Drew pushed her onto the bed, there was a sharp knock at his bedroom door.

"Mr. Hayden," a polite but firm voice said from outside the oak door. It was his housekeeper, Elizabeth. Drew would never admit it, but without her, he would be practically nothing except a handsome man with decent dancing skills. "You have a visitor!"

"Well who is it?" he asked, never once ceasing his fun with the blunette from the other night.

"They did not say sir."

"Well shouldn't you have asked?!" Drew snapped. Although he could not see, Elizabeth took a few wary steps away from the door and bowed her head apologetically. "Just tell them I'm busy!"

"Very well sir." Just as she began to walk away and Drew began to kiss the girl hard on the mouth, a red blur flew up the main stairs of the Hayden Estate. Elizabeth could only blink as the figure sped past her toward Drew's bedroom.

The door flew open, only to reveal May standing there, breathless. The blunette scrambled for the covers of the bed to hide her half-exposed body. Drew simply sat up, dumbstruck.

"Ugh, why am I not surprised?" May's cold sapphire eyes never left the two, completely unfazed by the situation that she walked in on. "I guess this blue-haired hussy came crawling back to you after you used her last night?" May spat. She then directed her gaze at the blunette in bed. "Don't you have a boyfriend you could be running home to?!"

Blushing furiously, the girl gathered up her clothes and ran out the door, attempting to hide her shame. Just as she left, May turned her attention back to Drew.

"God, what is wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not the one breaking into other people's homes, am I? Of course though, I can make sure this visit isn't wasted…" He patted the empty spot on the bed next to him suggestively.

May rolled her eyes. "That isn't why I came here at all. You know I have a boyfriend anyway."

"That didn't seem to stop her," Drew replied, referring to the long-gone blunette.

"I honestly don't know how I put up with you!" May exclaimed exasperated. "I came here, as a friend, to ask you for help and all you try to do is get in my pants!" May was growing livid; the color rising in her face caused Drew to grimace.

"Fine, fine," he said, sitting up straighter, "I'll get serious." Drew was tempted to add "with you" at the end of that statement, but held his tongue.

"Thank you," May said calmly. She pulled a chair closer to Drew's bed, occasionally getting it stuck on the thick carpet. Sitting on the chair backwards, May leaned forward as much as the back of the chair would allow. She gazed deep into Drew's emerald eyes, her own growing soft. A slight flush formed on his face as May placed her petite hands atop his larger ones. Wasn't May just vehemently expressing her disinterest in him? She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before looking at him once more.

"I need you to…"

Love me? Make wild love to me right now? Run away with me to some distant land where we can live happily ever after? Drew was honestly hoping for the 2nd option, but any combination of the three would be nice.

"…Teach Ash how to dance. Specifically, with me."

Drew's jaw dropped. "You want me to what?!" He never overreacted. But this… This was ridiculous!

"Teach Ash how to dance. With me. Need I say it again?"

"Please tell me you're joking."

"I'm joking."

Drew breathed a heavy sigh of relief and May grinned. "You know I only said that because you asked. I'm being completely serious."

"But… Making Ash a dancer is like making a mule fertile! As in, it's impossible! That man probably has three left feet!"

"Oh c'mon Drew. Pleasee."

"At least give me a reason. I mean, can't you just get another boyfriend with some sense of rhythm and coordination?"

"I can't believe you forgot!" May exclaimed.

"Wait a minute, forgot what?"

"You did forget! Um, hello? The Annual Hoenn Region Gala is in three weeks!"

"Oh right," Drew mumbled. "That."

"And as the daughter of the hosts, I'm expected to have a date who can dance as well as I!"

The entire event had slipped Drew's mind. May's parents, Norman and Caroline, owned the most respected dance studio in the entire region. Every year, the Maple family was in charge of holding the spectacular gala for all of Hoenn's elite class, whether they obtained the status because of dancing ability or wealth. Simply, it was a stuffy gathering of people with a superiority complex.

And of course, dancing was a major aspect of the gala. Not the fun freak dancing performed at clubs, but the proper ballroom dancing. In all honesty, Drew hated it. That didn't mean he couldn't do it and do it well; it just wasn't his style. That's why he took it upon himself to set up clubs around the region to allow those like May to escape from said "proper dancing" and just have fun.

Sighing, Drew glanced at her. "Again, can't you just find another date?"

"Yeah, and then have to endure an entire night of my parents' questioning. And I like Ash," May replied.

Damn. Deep down, Drew wished May would just forget about Ash, if only this once, and go with him instead.

"But why me?" May looked at him expectantly. Yeah, Drew wasn't really sure why he asked either. He didn't earn the title King of Dance for nothing. But there had to be a way to turn this in his favor. A way to make May fall for him…

"So, will you do it?"

Drew honestly wished there was another way. He and May…they had some sort of deep connection that ran further than mere friendship. Sure, they rarely saw eye to eye on anything, and argued almost every time they spoke, but there was a bond that allowed them to be totally comfortable around one another, even after May witnessed Drew with another woman or sitting there in bed shirtless. Drew knew though, that if he complied and taught Ash how to dance, everything they had would be over. Yet, because of this connection to May, and the desire not to let her down, Drew gave in.

"Fine, I'll do it." May's blue eyes lit up brightly as she practically threw herself at him. "But there's something I have to do first."


"Is this honestly what you needed to do first?"

"You said you wanted me to teach Ash how to dance with you. And in order to do that, this is completely necessary.

May sighed, understanding his logic, and allowed Drew to place his hands firmly on her slim waist. She snaked her arms around his neck and automatically felt compelled to move closer to him. The music hadn't even started yet but May already felt herself melting into Drew's arms. Ash had never felt so warm and secure to her. And – May noted as she laid her head on his chest – muscular.

Drew pressed a button on a small remote control and the music switched on, a slow ballad typical of the more upscale events like the approaching Gala. Taking the lead, Drew began to waltz around the dance floor, May in tow.

It was almost exactly as he dreamt it, except less cliché of course. Drew's dreams were always cliché, often involving May as a princess and himself as her prince, living together happily forever. Maybe it could be like that, if only Ash wasn't in the way. How did Drew allow himself to get dragged into this agreement?

Nevertheless, he enjoyed the dance with May immensely. She gracefully glided across the dance floor with him, in perfect time to the music. The two were in their own world, just them and the relaxing melody of the song.

May sighed contently and snuggled closer to Drew. This sensation of being in his arms… It was like a drug. And May was becoming more addicted with every step they took.

No. She couldn't fall for him. She couldn't betray Ash. But…she just couldn't fight the feeling within her. Her old feelings for him were returning rapidly, flooding her entire being. They were the feelings she had been trying to suppress for all these years…

May felt herself being drawn in, too overwhelmed to even register the song had ended. Too delusional to notice that they had stopped dancing, that Drew's hand was cupped around her chin, lifting her face to his, and that their lips were dangerously close to making contact…

Suddenly, reality came rushing back to May as she became conscious of her surroundings. Pushing Drew roughly on the chest, the man was propelled backwards. "I think we've danced enough for you to teach properly," she breathed.

Drew frowned and cursed inwardly. And they were just getting to the good part. There had to be another way… "So," he began, breaking the awkward silence that had fallen between them, "is Ash even aware you signed him up for dance lessons? With me?"

"Oh," May started, blushing slightly, "actually, it's going to be a surprise!"

"Well this is just lovely. Because it's perfectly normal for me to randomly decide to give another male dance lessons."

"Fine, I'll let him know. But I don't think that will make the lessons any more enjoyable."

"I never expected them to be…"

May turned to stare at the wall-length windows overlooking the vast gardens of the estate. The sun was beginning to set over the trees, painting the sky brilliant colors.

"It's getting late," she said. "Ash is probably wondering where I am." Drew nodded. "I'll give you a call when Ash has finished freaking out over the news."

"I'll be looking forward to that day," Drew replied, the sarcasm evident. "Oh, and May?"

She stopped in her tracks and spun to face him. "Hm?"

"If you're ever in the mood to dance again, you know where to find me." He winked playfully, causing May to leave in a huff. "Oh well," Drew said to himself grinning, "It was worth a shot."


Drew rested his chin on his hand as he watched sheets of rain fall in torrents from the comfort of the plush armchair in his study (which he rarely ever used, except for the random down days in which he felt like calculating his riches to remind himself how wealthy he was). It was almost noon, and his "pupil" would be arriving at any moment.

Drew was not looking forward to this. He had a plan though. A plan he deemed elaborately brilliant, a sure-fire way to win May's heart. All he had to do was be a bad teacher and claim to Ash he knew what he was doing. Then he would just explain to May how crappy of a student Ash was and how it wasn't his fault Ash didn't learn anything, even after being taught thoroughly by the King of Dance. Flawless, right?

Or so Drew thought…


Well there's the first chapter. The alternate world in which they live will be explained a bit more later. But obviously, it's a world in which dancing is muy importante.

Anyway, the next chapter is already written and should be coming soon.

Please review, for they motivate me!