first ever fanfic well that i have posted for gilmore girls. i own nothing but my mind. please be kind.
lots has happened in my life and in a way it has shaped be to be the person that i am today and for that i guess i am greatful. i have found the guy that i want to spend the rest of my life with even though lorelai does not agree with me, she hasn't really gotten to know him she just wrote him off as a spolied prepy rich boy who would cottupt me and take me away from the stars hollow world but recently i've been thinking about everything and while no doubt i do love stars hollow it is the town that helped bring me up its no longer my home, i could never go back there and live with my new family its just not the same i have moved on with my life and she doesnt seem to understand that, she thinks that i will just give up my dreams of writting and news because of Logan she thinks that i will just become the trophy wife that leaves the kids at home with the nannies and checks into a spa and gossip about who's having an affair with who and turn a blind eye to my husbands affairs. but she doesnt really know me anymore, she doesnt know that logan has been there for me in times when no else was, times that even if he didn't agree with what i was doing he still supported me, just so that i would have someone on my side that didn't mean he didn't argue with me to try and make me see sense and see what i was doing was a huge mistake, like when i dropped out of yale he keeped trying to get me to go back he knew i missed yale, missed classes and the paper he knew i missed my mother too and was hurt that she didn't support me and i guess thats when we started to drift apart even more, more than she would of liked, i think she didnt realize that she was keeping me back without realizing or maybe thats what she wanted to do she thinks that i can be this famous reporter all while still being in stars hollow keeping me from the world she doesnt want me to expand my wings and see the world for what it is and what it has to offer.
today logan asked me to marry him and while i was shocked that he did it in front of everyone at my graduation party and even though i told him i needed the night to think it over i really wanted to say yes but i saw mums face, i saw the dissapointment in her face and i wanted to find out what she was thinking so i told him i needed time and would tell him my answer tomorrow. asking her what she thought really triggered the fact that despite all the things logan has done and yes some weren't good and they hurt she didn't like him at all, tolerated him because of me but she thought he wouldn't last long and thought he would run back to his playboy was once something went wrong but she is wrong and it really hurt when i asked her what she thought she told me i should say no that i wasn't ready and that i needed time to figure out what i was doing with my life and make a name for myself and that logan would hold me back, and while i wanted to scream at her for the things she said i didnt i let her say them why? because i knew my answer and it really didn't matter what she thought anymore i was a grownup and i needed to make my own decisions, create my own future and the future that i want is logan, she just left telling me to get some rest and not think about the engagement and that telling him i wasnt ready is the best thing.
so now im sitting her starring at the beautiful engagement ring that he bought me, nothing too fancy but not plain either something that really fitted me. taking out of the box i slide it on my finger and see how well it fits on my finger how it looks like it was made just for me and that anyone else to wear the ring wouldn't do it justice because its my ring and it will always be my fing. picking up the phone i pressed 1 on my speed dail waiting for him to answer, he used to be number 2 but ever since he went to london out love grew stronger and he really became the number 1 person in my life.
Rory "hey, its me. can i come over?"
logan "yeah of course you can, i thought you needed time away from me though?"
Rory " i'll tell you when i get there ok?"
Logan "sure Ace i'll send frank to pick you up if thats ok?"
Rory "yeah thats fine, i'll see you soon then"
Logan "you will Ace"
Rory "i love you logan"
Logan "love you too Ace"
with that i hung up the phone changed out of my pj's into jeans and my blue cami top slipped my thongs on grabbed my jacket, keys, wallet and phone and went downstairs to meet frank, saying hello to frank i climbed into the car and we made out way back to logans, the ride didn't take long i spent the whole time looking out the window smiling at the memories about me and logan around new haven. i was bought out of my thoughts when frank opened i climbed out thanked him and bid him goodnite, as i made my way into logan's apartment building i was greated by the doorman and made my way to the lift, once inside i present the penthouse button and waited for the doors to close and take me up to him. arriving at his floor i made my way to his door stopping in front of it i didn't know if i should use my key or to knock, taking the safe option i knocked i wasnt sure how he was feeling since he left the party didnt know if he was mad at me or not, though i couldnt blame him if he was.
Logan "hey how come you didn't use your key?"
Rory " i was sure if i should or not so i went with the safe option of knocking"
Logan "why werent you sure?"
Rory "didn't know if u were mad at me or not?"
Logan "Ace baby im not mad at you promise"
he pulled me inside closing the door behind us and hugged me it was then i was 100 sure that i was making the right decision, we made our way over to the couch we sat there silently for awhile i knew he was wondering why i was here and what i would say, getting sick of waiting to know he turn to me and asked
Logan" babe you know i love that your here but why?"
Rory "we need to talk or well really i need to talk to you and it was important and i couldnt wait till tomorrow to tell you because i really need to and if i wait i would of been thinking about it all tomorrow and i dont want to spend my graduation thinking about it so yeah"
Logan "ok babe."
we were quiet for awhile i didnt say anything at first trying to figure out exactly what i wanted to say but the silence was driving me crazy, both of us crazy
Logan "babe are u going to tell me? or do i have to try and read your mind to find out whats going on?"
Rory " haha no baby your mind reading skills are not required. i guess i should just come out and say it all right?"
Logan "that could help"
Rory " ok. here goes nothing. tonight was a shock and not just my grandparents singing but the proposal it was kinda out of nowhere and
Logan " rory.."
rory "no wait just hear me out first ok?"
rory " so like i was saying before you interrupted me, the proposal was out of nowhere i didnt see it come, well not right at this moment not at my graduation party and while i have thought about marriage with you, many times, hours spent just day dreaming about our future together i was still shocked that you asked me, and that you asked me infront of all those people and i have to admit i always thought you would ask me in private but still in a romantic way if you get what i mean and so when you asked i didn't know what to do because will i was happy that you asked i still didn't know what i would be doing after yale and that kinda scared me but i need you to know that i wanted to say yes then and there and i was going to but then i saw lorelai's face and i panicked abit when i saw the dissapointment in her face but also the anger so before saying yes to you i wanted to know were me and her stood, how she felt about you and how she felt about us getting married which was the only reason why i told you i needed time from you to think"
rory "no no no just wait and listen ok?" logan nodded so i continued " now that might not have been the best thing to say to you but it just kinda came out that way, and while mum and i were on the horse carriage, romantic by the way babe you get points for that, more points if you had proposed in that but anyways moving off topic here, mum and i were sitting there not saying anything and i had the ring in my hand and i just kept looking at it then i asked mum what she thought about everything, you, me marriage and she told me, told me i wasnt ready and that i would make a mistake in saying yes and that i would get sawolled into the hartford torphy wives club"
logan" ace you would never be that, i wouldnt let you"
rory " i know that logan but mum doesnt, she thinks that your changing me and that i would just fall into that role without noticing it and giving up my career at the same time which i have no plans of doing i love writting, i love journalism too much to give it up and maybe i wont become that overseas reporter and maybe when having kids i would just do freelance writting but i would never give it up and she doesnt realize that im not giving up on my dream just changing abit to suit me, to suit us in the future. i dont want nannies looking and rasing my kids without me, without us around all the time and i know that we might need help from them i wouldnt change it for the world i want to be there for my kids in ways you parents werent there for you and honor and i know you want that too." logan nodded but didnt say anything so that i could continue " i've been thinking about marriage with you since you went to london and yes i know that was a year ago but you have to realize i thought in some way i was losing you and i didn't want that, seeing you in the hospital made me realize that yes i want to spend my life with you but you going to london made me want marriage with you even more, i wanted to be your wife and i still do but you going made me grow up and it made me realize to have that yes i had to change my dreams a little but it was worth it because i couldn't see a future without you. i need my future to have you in, and journalism in any form that i can get it. so after thinking long and hard about it and many pro/con lists. and dont even thinking about mocking them mister i can see that smirk on your face. i know that we will need to prove to lorelai just how much we need each other and we wont be like all those other hartford couples but i also need for her to see that stars hollow is no longer me.
logan " rory wait stars hollow is your home. its what makes you, you"
rory " i know that logan and it will always be my home and i will go back and visit, both of us but its not me, im not that small town girl anymore i stopped being her a long time ago and i need you to understand that and i need lorelai to as well. i cant live my life the way she wants to, she cant control my life anymore if she wants me to be happy she has to accept you in my life and i refuse to give you up so that shes happy. so yes logan i want to marry you. but do you think you could ask me again?"
Logan leaned over and kissed me, it was one of my favorite types of kisses not needy but still passionate even if it was a small kiss.
Logan " Loeralai Leight Gilmore-Hayden will you make me the happiest man in the world and do the honor of becoming my wife for the rest of life, be the mother to my kids, the women that i want to come home to every single day, the women i fall asleep next to and the women i wake up next to. Marry Me?"
by now i had tears streaming down my face and it took alot to find my voice but i kept nodding my head i swear i must of looked like one of those nodding dog things people have in there cars. i couldnt help smiling either i was so happy, i leaned in to give him a quick kiss pulling back i found my voice "yes Logan i will marry you" i swear his smile got even bigger than i thought possible he pulled me closer hugging and kissing me we stayed like that for a long time not moving or saying anything just happy being together, no words needed to be said.
after awhile i was getting sleepy and logan noticed "comon ace lets get you to bed" he said as he pulled me up into his arms, i moved my head slightly so i could kiss him, begging him for entrance which he gladly accepted, when oxygen become a problem i pulled back and wispered into his ear "we still haven't celebrated it yet" moving back from him i made my way back to the bedroom where we started celebrating our engagement.
a few hours later we layed tangled together in bed, the sex was different this time it was all about love and each other nothing else not just because we needed it and it was really good too, i looked up at logan and noticed him smiling back at me i leaned up and kissed him it was short and sweet but i still hadn't regained my stregenth from the last round.
Logan "hey Ace can i ask you something?"
Rory "yeah u can, of course you can my fiance"
Logan "wow i love hearing you call me that my fiance"
Rory "same here. now what did u want to ask?"
Logan " i noticed while we were talking, well while you were talking before that you kept calling your mum lorelai, which was odd. so i guess what im asking is how come you were calling her that istead of mum?"
Rory "oh that i tend to do that when im ranting and im mad at her it always comes out lorelai instead. its been more frequent of recently but yeah"
Logan " you know Ace, i just realised you went a long way to say yes in your speech"
Rory "well i needed you to know everything before i actually said yes and got you to ask me again, i couldnt say yes without you knowing all of that"
Logan "well im glad you did and im so happy that you said yes"
Rory "hm sleep now, i have to be up early for graduation. mean seriously who makes the ceremony that early in the morning. its so not normal"
Logan "haha well dont complain to me babe complain to the dean."
Rory "oh i should be you know i wont. Good-nite logan."
Logan "nite babe, i love you"
Rory "love you too mac"
love it? hate it? let me know. writting chapter two at the moment. contains a bit of drama. review please.