All I Know

Summarry: This is a Crancy story. It goes way back to when they were in collage. What if she hadn't been raped by a family friend that night?

The strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I've hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now, there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay

He didn't even know why he got so mad at her.

Craig Wesley was sitting in his car outside, his ex-girlfriend's house.

Truth was, he was just so sick of her father coming between them, and of her not seeing it. And he didn't understand why her father was so hell-bent on keeping them apart.

Who was her father to tell him that they weren't right for each other? That he wasn't good enough for Nancy?

He loved Nancy, he wanted to be with her, make her happy, and take care of her. That's all he knew. That's all he wanted.

So, why was he still sitting outside her house, having this inner-war with himself?

The same reason why he hadn't talked to her in three weeks, pride.

Craig let out a huge sigh, and turned the key in the ignition, the car started back up again. He was about to back up, and leave, when he noticed Nancy and some other guy he'd never seen before walking out the front door.

Was she swaying? Craig stopped the car, putting his pride and jealousy aside for the moment to go see what was going on.

Craig got out of the car, and made his way over to them.

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down

"Craig!" Nancy was surprised to see him, she wasn't even quite sure if he was really there with the drunken stupor she was in. "Wh-ar-yo-" She couldn't quite get out what she wanted to say, her balance already swaying.

"What am I doing here?" Craig gently supplied.

"I thou--" Nancy took a deep breath, the cold breeze washing over her. "I thought you never wanted to see me again."

Craig closed his eyes in deep regret, just seeing her made him realize why that whole fight had been a big mistake. "That's what I'm here to talk to you about, Nance. Can we go somewhere and talk?"

"I'm going to take her for coffee." Fredrick spoke up.

Craig looked at him, and didn't like him at all. There was just something about him. What the hell was he doing with a girl alot younger than him, who was clearly drunk? "You're not taking my girlfriend anywhere."

"I'm your girlfriend now?" Nancy stumbled slightly, and Craig reached out to for her, but she pushed at him. "I'm fine!"

But if you give me chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together
Whatever it takes

"Nancy, I just want to talk to you, okay? Just come with me, and we can sort everything out, alright?" No matter what she said, or how mad she was at him, or how upset he may have been at her, there was no way in hell he was leaving her in the condition she was in with some guy he didn't even know, and wasn't even sure she knew.

"No!" Nancy yelled. "I'm just a spoiled brat, right?!"

"Look," Fredrick once again spoke up. "she doesn't wanna go with you, so why don't you back off?"

"Why don't you back off?" Craig retorted, and punched him in the stumach.

Fredrick fell to the ground, clutching his abdomen.

"My God, Craig!" Nancy yelled. "What the he--" She started swaying again. Craig reached for her, and this time she didn't push him away. "Oh, I really don't feel well."

"Sweetie, I know you're upset with me, but come on." Craig gently spoke. "Let's just get out of here, okay? We really need to talk, and you need to lay down."

"Fine." Nancy agreed.

She said 'if we're gonna make this work,
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts'
'Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see'
She said, 'like it or not, it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me'

A few minutes after they'd gotten in the car, and were on the road, Craig started lecturing her.

"What the hell were you thinking?"

"Huh?" Nancy's head was really pounding by now, and she couldn't quite keep up a coherent conversation for much longer.

"Were you actually gonna go off with him?" Craig asked her angrily.

"Maybe." Nancy replied, still sightly angry at him acting like he had any right to care at all what she did. He lost that right when he broke up with her.

"Did you even know the guy?" Craig couldn't believe how careless she could be in this day and age. All the campus rape lectures that had been given... "Or is this just something you do now?!"

"How DARE you?!" Nancy yelled, wincing as she did so, due to her headache.

"How DARE I?!" Craig threw back. "Someone has to look after you, since you clearly can't do it yourself."

"I was fine. I didn't need you." Nancy retorted. "Why are you even lecturing me anyway? You dumped me, Craig." Nancy turned away from him, tears forming in her eyes. "You don't wanna waste your time loving me anymore."

Craig sighed. "I didn't mean that, Nance. Loving you has been anything but a waste of time."

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down

"Then, why'd you say it?" Nancy turned to face him, wiping her tears away.

"I was upset. Your father has done nothing but try to tear us apart from the beginning, and I just got so sick of you not seeing it. He's your father, and I know that because of that you have these blinders on when it comes to him. You don't want to disappoint him, but do you ever take in the fact that he doesn't seem to care that he always disappoints you?" Craig reached out and gently wiped a tear from her eye. "He always hurts you, and you always run to me and want me to make everything better for you. And don't get me wrong, I love being that person for you, Nancy. I wanna love you, and make you happy, take care of you the way you deserve to be taken care of. I just got frustrated that night, babe. It's like nothing I was saying was registering in your brain. Your father doesn't like me, and I can deal with that. It's fine, but I can't deal with him constantly hurting you. I stood up for you, and you got so angry with me."

"You punched him." Nancy said.

"Well, he had no right to say those things about you, Nancy." Craig replied, still angry when he thought about the thoughtless words that her father had said to her. "He called you an insubordinate waste."

"Maybe he's right." Nancy said sadly.

"He's not right." Craig objected. "He's got this perfect image in his head of who he wants you to be, and he just can't seem to grasp the fact that you're unique in your own way. You're your own person, and he can't stand that. He wants to control you. He knows I'm in the way of that. He knows that I won't take the way he treats you. And he hates that. He hates me."

And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together
I know you deserve much better

"My parents have no idea how much that I love you, Craig." Nancy said after a few seconds of silence. "They just expect me to move on, just get over you."

"Is that what you were trying to do tonight?" Craig asked her softly. "Were you trying to forget about me, by leaving with that guy?"

"You were all I talked about with Fredrick." Nancy spoke softly. "I kept telling him how much I love you, and he kept giving me more alcohol. Which, I'm really regretting drinking right now, because my head really pounds."

"I'm just glad I got there before you left with him." Craig replied. "I know that you're angry with me, and that I hurt you. I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry that I said those things and that we fought, but..."

"But what?" Nancy asked softly.

"You're nice, okay? You're a really nice person, and you have a really wonderful heart, but what you need to realize is that not everyone out there...not EVERY GUY out there is that way. There are guys out there, guys like Fredrick," Craig explained, still slightly pissed at the whole situation. "that would take advantage of someone like you."

"I can take care of myself, Craig." Nancy said, starting to get mad. "Is that why you're here? You think you need to save me or something?!"

"No!" Craig yelled, getting pissed off at her again, he turned the wheel and pulled over to the side of the road. "I'm here because I love you!"

But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you
Never find myself
Lets hold onto each other above everything else
Start over
Start over

Nancy stared at him, slightly stunned at his revelation. After the way they'd fought, she thought for sure it was all over, but to see him this way, and to hear him tell her that he was here because he loved her...well, it meant everything to her. "You do?"

"Of course, I do!" Craig was offended, that she could even think for one second that he didn't still love her. "Just because I love you, doesn't mean that I don't still get pissed off at you, and just because I get pissed off at you doesn't mean that I don't completely love you with all of my heart. You and I, we fight. Sometimes we REALLY fight. I try to get you to understand something, you don't, you say things and I get pissed off at you. I get frustrated even, but there is not one single second during even the absolute WORST of our fights when I'm not completely and totally IN LOVE with you. I love you now, just like I loved you then."

Nancy smiled, tears rolling down her face. "I love you too, Craig." Nancy reached over and hugged him, and his arms went around her as he held her back. "I love you too."

"I'm sorry for what I said, Sweetheart." Craig apologized, as he held on to her. "I'm so, so sorry. I gave up, for one split second I gave up on you and I'll never be able to tell you how sorry I am for that. I made a mistake, I don't want to let you go. I CAN'T let you go, Nancy. I love you way too much, I NEED you way too much."

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together
Whatever it takes

"I need you too." Nancy whispered. "I'm sorry for being so stubbern about my father, it's just..."

"He's your father, babe. He may be an idiot when it comes to loving you, but he's your father. He's the only father you've got." Craig said.

"Yeah, but you're the only boyfriend I've got." Nancy replied. "The only boyfriend that I want. I can't let you go, not even for my dad. He just doesn't understand that you really love me. He doesn't see you the way that I do."

Craig pulled back from her, and kissed her passionetly. "I love you so much," He murmured between kisses. "that's all I know."

"I love you so much," Nancy replied, leaning her forehead against his as she enjoyed being back with the one person in this world who made her feel complete.

Song Credit: Lifehouse - Whatever It Takes