This a a story that is really far along on my board, but I have decided to start posting it. Its a dark and very porny little story that is odd as hell. If you don't like dirty, don't read! Enjoy!

As I sit here in my bed, I still can't believe it. He's right here. I look down, and there he is, his dark brown curls laying on my egyptian cotton pillowcase. His deep blue eyes, covered by tired, heavy lids. He is here, in my bed. A place where boys are not allowed to sleep. A place that is saved for me. But yet, I can't make him go. And I don't want to.

It's quite an crazy tale. A mixture of mischief and porny thoughts. And from porny thoughts, comes porny actions. It was something that was never supposed to happen. It was something that I swore I would never do. But sometimes you put your foot in the water, and you can't help but take a bath. He did that to me. He pulled me in and under. And it was worth it.

It all started in an odd way. It wasn't him in the beginning. Life had to take just the right path, and I had to make just the right choices. I did. Took the path of most resistance you could say, because it sure as hell wasn't easy. It was a secret emotional roller coaster that was never supposed to be. And now I will tell you my story. Because It wants to be told.

Apparently I had a new cousin. Now me saying this, you would probably assume that I am saying I have a new baby in the family. Not so much. My father's sister, had adopted a child. But he isn't a child. He was a boy. A teen. A young adult. Sixteen. Too old to adopt. But she was saving him. A friend of the family, who's parents were gone. Dead. Gone. And she saved him. Saved him from the system. Saved him from himself. And now I have to deal with him.

I was nonchalant. Like I was better than him. I would show up late. At the holidays, everyone gathers to my grandparent's house. The funny thing is, this is my father's parents, and he's not around. Apparently, he found it necessary to run off with another family and leave me with my evil bitch mother. No one talked about it. Grandma was in denial. My mother didn't care. She was probably partially responsible for the downfall. So I have no dad. And no one knows where he is. And thus there is a big gray area... Which ironically is my last name. I am Meredith Grey.

They were there for three days before I showed up. I didn't need to come crawling over there giving hugs and pretending life was wonderful. It's not. In fact, I have a saying... Life blows. And not in the good way. Not in the suck your cock hard and drink you down because I like the way to taste sort of way. No, it blows more in the cock slap you until you are bruised and bloody way. And if you don't agree with that, then good for you. Obviously your life hasn't blown.

So three days. And then I show up. I walk in there like I am the boss. This kid is pissing on my territory. I am princess here. I have already talked about it. Negotiations. I actually had them. Fifty percent. He was entitled to fifty percent of what I got. If I got three hundred dollars, he would get one-fifty. Period. I got more. I am boss. I am princess.

There he was. He stuck out. Literally. Not his cock! Seriously. I swear he had glue in his hair. No. He really had glue in his hair. I know what you are thinking. It was not gel. It was Elmer's. The poor damn horse that contributed to that bottle was fucked. Now he was on a horny sixteen year old's head. He was awkward. I had to laugh. I had to. It was white, like cum. Cum in his hair. Who was he blowing?

"Hey." He said to me. Seriously... Was he really talking to me? "I'm Mark."

"I'm Meredith." I muttered as he stuck out his hand. Awesome dude. What are you, fifty?

"I heard you don't like hugs... So..." He muttered sheepishly. Who had the upper hand? I have the upper hand. He is sheepish.

My aunt came up and gave me a hug. I hate hugs. I do not like the physical touch. I have issues. I have reasons. And I don't talk about it, period. Don't like it? Too damn bad.

My family is so fucking fake it makes me sick. Everyone is happy. Do they not know that people are dying? Do they not know that life sucks? Yeah. Blows, remember? That is how my family is. Let's all be happy, pass the fucking gravy. And me, I want to splash the steaming hot goop in their face and cause burns on their flesh. Blisters. Yeah, apparently I am dark too. I forgot to mention that.

It went on like this. Let's gather around the t.v. and glue our eyes so we don't have to talk about the shit, like my father running off. Or that Mark's parents are dead. Still don't know why... Probably drowned in glue. So we sit in a haze. A Grey haze. We are so talented.

--

Mark was annoying. Damn annoying. I learned this in the days that I spent with him. I heard that boys at that age are extremely immature. I found that out first hand. Everything was I hate you. I hate you or whining. He couldn't drive because my aunt and uncle wouldn't let him while we were on vacation. That meant I got to drive him around. At first I hated it. But then it got better.

Mark was fun. Fun in a really immature way that made me act like a fool. We were stupid. We were loud. He made me into a fool. He was always screwing with me. There was something about that huge foot in my mouth that made me mean. That made me hateful and out for blood. Just what he needed. I did what I had to as his oversized body smashed mine.

"Ouch!" Mark yelled as I bit him in the arm.

"Quit being a little bitch." I laughed as I looked up at him.

"No fucking teeth!" He said quickly. "It fucking hurts."

"Yeah, I know. That's why I did it. Like I want your sock in my mouth, ass!" I spit back, only to receive glares from the family. Apparently they don't like my newfound immaturity.

I try to act normal, but something about Mark draws me in. Yeah, he's an immature little ass... But he pulls me in. I feel comfortable around him. Maybe it's because I am so busy with my responsibilities that I don't have time to have a life. I pretend I don't like him. It's my way. I know nothing else. So there I sit, pretending I don't notice him, but really wanting his attention.

"Hey... You want to go to a movie?" He asks as he looks over.

"Yeah... I guess. Whatever." I tell him with a shrug. Yes, get me away from this hell. Away from these people. He quickly walks off after we decide on a movie. Just as a drain my grandfather of all his hard earned money, my aunt walks up.

"Thanks... For going. Mark has had a rough life. He's gone through some major stuff. So thanks for going easy on him." She says with a smile.

"You owe me." I spit nastily, even though it is a complete lie. He is saving me from them.

Just as I sit back, I see him coming towards me. So apparently the glue that was in his hair was now replaced with gel. He looked like an idiot. I'm not sure what he was trying to accomplish, but whatever it was, it was unsuccessful. Or at least I should hope it was.

I drove. He can't, so yay me. And that meant System of a Down so loud that I couldn't think. I couldn't hear a thing. All I could do was wait for the lights and sirens as he hung out the window and screamed at cars passing by. I couldn't help but laugh. He was freaking nuts. Apparently, blowing kisses and flirting with men in the other cars was his idea of fun. And it was even better way of almost getting his ass kicked.

When we get to the theatre, I try to keep my distance. I have never been on a date. This was not a date. This was my cousin. Even if there wasn't a drop of blood relation between us, it was still odd. I didn't want people to actually think I had anything to do with this freak show. So I stood as far away from him as he paid for our tickets. He paid. The money from grandpa... I so kept that shit. He paid, I stayed away. Yes, I am not with him. Nope. Not me.

"Popcorn?" Mark asked as he handed me the tub.

"Eh... Okay." I said quickly. Let it go straight to my ass. I was next to him. My original thought was not to sit with him. Two seats over. But then that would just be really weird.

"My friend... Fucking crazy. Once he stuck his cock in the tub of popcorn." Mark started. Oh god... Seriously? Random. Way random. Why even bring that shit up? "Through the bottom. His girlfriend reached in, started jacking him off."

"Okay. First of all, here. I think I lost my appetite." I say as I hand him the popcorn back. All of a sudden it doesn't sound good. No creamy white butter for me. Even if it does add to the saltiness. "Secondly that is such bullshit. How did he get it in there? I doubt he poked a hole with his cock. If he did, he is the man of steel, and I want to fucking meet him. He had to have had a knife or something. And that makes no sense. And I doubt if he did cut a hole in the container and stick his stupid cock in the buttery mess, that his girlfriend just jacked him off. She would have freaked. The first thought that would come to one's mind is not, "Oh, there is a cock in this tub, my boyfriend's cock, let's give him a hand job." It would be "Holy shit! What's in there?" That story is bullshit, Mark!" I spat as he I looked at him.

He looks at me like I'm nuts. Apparently he has been around my family for too long. The silent ones. They would sit there in silence. They would hear his little story and they would shake their heads like they actually heard him. They don't listen. They never listen. That is why I don't talk. And if I do, it's no mistake. I mean what I say.

"Wow." He says as he looks over at me. "You are a little nuts."

"Yeah." I say with a shrug.

"Well, that's what he told me." Mark mutters as the theatre goes dark.

The movie sucked. It sucked hairy balls. I hated it. He had knack for picking out sucky movies, I'd find out. It was supposed to be funny. It had it's occasional funny moments, but in all, it sucked. And I couldn't wait to get out of there.

When we got out from the horrible movie, we rush outside. Just as we make towards my car, he bends down. Crap. Snow. He has snow. Before I can even react, it hits me in the face. That pissed me off. Instead of fighting back, I am so much smarter. I rush to the car and jump in, locking the doors.

"What now, fucker?" I yell as I look up at him.

First he bangs on the window. I flip him off and smile. Now what does he think. He was so fucking smart... Not now. Not now. That is, until he got on my car. Oh yeah, he was jumping on my Jeep. I rolled down the window. I am going to kill him.

"Get the fuck down!" I start screaming. Nope. He doesn't. He proceeds with his stupid little game.

I'm going to kill him. I am sure of that. I quickly jump out and climb up there with him. "Get off my car."

"Come on, drive me around!" He whines as I look at him.

"No. Let's go. Off the car. Now." I yell as I glare at him.

"Nope." He laughs as he looks at me. Apparently he underestimates my size. Apparently he has no idea.

"Have it your way." I say frankly as I shove my weight into him, sending him off the roof.

"You bitch!" He yells from his new place on the ground. I can't blame him, he just fell on the hard blacktop. It may have had and inch of snow covering it. Maybe.

"Fuck you. I warned you!" I yell loudly as I look down at him.

"I can play this." He warns me as he climbs in my Jeep. Before I can even get down, the car is started and he is driving. I grab onto the roof rack and start screaming.

"I'm going to die, you mother fucker!" I yell loudly. I could die. I really could. He is doing donuts in the snow. People are gone. No one is around to save me. I scream loudly. But then it hits me. This is fun. Really fun. "Faster!" I yell loudly. If I am going to die, this is the way.

We took turns. Yep. Its a game. I do not recommend it. It doesn't always end well. Luckily ours does. But it was fun. He does that. He makes me do crazy things. For the first time in awhile, I am having fun. We finally stop. Its late. Really late. We really should go back.

"So... What do you want to do next?" He asks with a grin. So much trouble, so little time.

--

Sometimes, you just want to drive. You just want to avoid the world. Especially at night, it's easy, less traffic, less confusion. So we drove, looking for somewhere to go. Something to do. I liked my time with him. The other side of my crazy family was actually getting jealous of the fun I was having. Mind you, I did not speak of said fun. Nor did I give them details. They did that. They wanted me all to themselves. I mean, who doesn't want constant negativity and cruelty in their lives?

I was counting down the days until he went home. Christmas went well. He did get fifty percent. Everyone knew better than to mess with me on those grounds. The sad thing was, he really appreciated everything he got. Me, I toss it aside, "Where is the next?" But Mark wanted his things. He appreciated it all. He was happy to be accepted. And as much as I hated to admit it, I was accepting him.

"How about here?" I ask him as we pull into a late night diner.

"Sounds good, I'm hungry." Mark agrees with a nod as I stopped the car.

We sit down across from each other. It's getting more comfortable. I am not as self conscious about people wondering about us. I realized that people didn't care. Why would they? Admittedly, I have issues. And at this moment, I am not changing. I am embracing those issues. I like pain. Pain is weakness leaving the body.

"So what are you having?" I ask as I look across the table at him.

"I don't know... I wanted mexican." He whines as he looks into my eyes.

"Well, you could have told me that before I came here. You said this was fine." I told him frankly. "We are here now. I think I am going to have a burger."

"Yeah, that sounds good." He agrees as he looks at the menu. "Bacon cheeseburger."

"I like my steaks medium-rare. But burgers, they need to be well done. They are all squished up and processed. Not a solid piece of meat, you know?" I ask as I look up.

"Uh huh..." He mutters as he looked at his menu.

The waitress comes, and we order. He orders a burger. Rare. He obviously did not listen to my whole statement. Typical boy. Typical not listening boy. I hope he enjoys his raw cow parts on a bun. He was trying to impress me. He was trying to be like me. He wanted me to like him. That way he too could stay away from the bore-fest. He liked me. I could tell.

"So... Your mom and dad are dead." I say frankly. Way to be compassionate. That's me.

"Yeah." He mutters. It stings. I can see it in his light blue eyes.

"That sucks. Sorry." I say nicely. "Life really sucks."

"I'm- It's okay." He tells me as he draws in a breath.

"My mom is never around. She's a surgeon, but that is all she cares about. She used to want my to follow in her footsteps. Now she has given up on me. I am a disappointment. I haven't seen her in months. It was Christmas, and I didn't see her. And my dad, well, he's off with his other family." I offer up as I look at him.

"Sorry." He mutters, softly and genuinely.

"So was it rough?" I ask him as I look across the table.

"Yeah. It was like one day I had parents. The next day they were gone." He explains. "I slit my wrists. I tried to kill myself." He tells me quickly. He too is dark. There is more to him than meets the eye.

"Did you do it the right way?" I ask as I sip my soda. Who asks that? Me. Dark and twisty Meredith asks that.

"Along the vein. Vertically... Yeah." He tells me as he shows me his wrists.

"If your gonna do it-" I start.

"Do it right." He finishes with me.

"Yeah." I mutter as I look into his somewhat sad eyes. No wonder he is immature. He is just as fucked as I am. "My life is fucked to. I have issues. Shit's happened." I explain. I can't open up. But I can make an offer to him. I can let him see that he isn't the only one. I have skeletons too.

The waitress comes up and brings his burger. It is well done. I think she thought he was joking. Or she screwed up the order. Either way, he looked relieved. We drifted somewhat away from the dark and twisty conversation. We needed to. But we were a reflection of fucked up pasts. Before we leave, I pay the bill. Just one small offering. We are kindred spirits. I like him. I really do.

--

I have horses. I think it was something my mom encouraged me to do, just to get rid of me. She could dump me off at the farm, and forget about me. I mean, I like them, I love them. But it's a huge responsibility. And now I have them. And to add even more joy, I get to take care of them. It's go to school and take care of them. My mom doesn't care about where I am at, or what I am doing. She pays the bills and forgets I am even alive.

Mark wanted to go with me. Why, I'm not really sure. But he said to wake him up. Any means necessary. That was really the wrong thing to say. I look up at the clock. It's time. It's eight already. I should have been up earlier, but I was already up all night. I quickly get myself ready and walk into Mark's room.

"Oh my god..." I mutter as I begin laughing. Mark is in the bed, completely uncovered, with his balls in his hands. Under his boxers, but definitely some ball-hand action going on. I walk up to the bed and kick the mattress. "Hey... Mark. Get up." I say loudly as I look down at him. Any means necessary. He is a deep sleeper.

I chuckle to myself. If he knew how I really was, he would have never said that. I rushed up the stairs and into the kitchen. My grandma is already muttering something about breakfast. She has this need to feed everyone. Everyone. It doesn't matter who it is. She must feed. And I must ignore. I quickly grabbed as much ice as I could handle and trotted back down the stairs. I placed the ice on he bed and winced. Good fun to be had. With one hand I lift the boxers, the other, the ice. I close my eyes and throw it in.

"Ahhh!" He yelled loudly as he jumped up. "What the fuck?" He screams as he jumps around, attempting to get it out.

"You said any means. I tried for twenty-minutes." I lie as I look at him.

"I didn't mean that. Not ice! Messing with a guy's package could get you killed, you know." He warned me as I stood there.

"Eh... It was worth it. Besides, I closed my eyes. I was afraid I would pass out at the freakishly small sized manhood you have." I giggle as I looked at him.

"Funny. It's not small. Not by any means." He says frankly.

I'd imagine he is right. I will admit it. I look. I want to know. Just short of walking up and asking someone how big their cock is, I try to figure it out. Mark's a big guy. I didn't want that cock. Even if we are not really related, he was becoming friend and family. But that didn't mean I didn't take a little look. It's big, I'm sure of it. How big, I will never know.

"Yeah... Like I care. Come on, we have to go." I tell him frankly as I look towards the door.

"I just got up." He whines as he pulls a shirt over his head.

"And I care. Look, you wanted to go. The horses want to eat. Let's go." I tell him quickly as I start to walk away.

"So horses come first?" He asks loudly.

"Of course horses come first. They can't feed themselves, and they are waiting on me." I tell him as I push his door shut.

I march up the stairs. I know he is on my tail. He follows me like a puppy. I pounced on him, I am the boss. I am the alpha mare. I am the bitch. I win. And here he comes, I can hear his big dumb ass following me up. We walk through the kitchen and I see grandma ready to serve.

"Ready for breakfast? She asks softly.

"Nope. Have to go to the barn." I spit as I walk off.

"No breakfast?" Mark whined as he looked up and followed.

"No." I grumble as I continue to the door and pull on my boots.

"Here, get yourself something." Grandma tells Mark as she hands over a twenty dollar bill.

"Thanks, grandma." Mark said with a smile.

Whoa there. What the hell was that? Grandma. No. She is my grandma. We just picked him up alongside the road. He can't come in here and call her grandma. What the hell was that? Ah, that just makes me mad. I clench my jaw as I look at him. At least he is only entitled to fifty-perfect. Haha, sucker.

"Whoa! Grandma?" I ask him quickly.

"Well, yeah... She is my grandma too." Mark tells me with a nod.

"No. No, she is not. They are not. You are an extra." I mutter as I look up. "You can't wear those." I said with a chuckle as I look at him pulling on his tennis shoes.

"Why not?" He asks as he looks at me.

"Are you freaking kidding me? Have you looked outside? There is four inches of snow out there. Whatever. Freeze. I don't care." I mutter as we walk outside. "Besides, your feet are so big, it's like you have snow shoes on anyway. Skis..." I laugh as I start the car. "Clean the car off." I tell him as I throw him the ice scraper. He takes it and goes to work. Now this is fun. My own slave.

"So how many horses do you have?" Mark asks as we drive down the road.

"Two. But my friend Izzie, has one there too." I explain as we go along.

"So you've had horses for a long time?" He asks as he looks over.

"I have been riding since I was seven." I tell him as I look over.

"You come out here everyday?" He questions quickly.

"Twice a day." I mutter as we near.

This would be fun. I was convinced that this would be the most fun I had ever had. Or the most torture put on another person from my hand. I pull up into the snowy mess. And it is. The four inches that has been dumped on us is no fun. Mark looks around with a frown on his face. I'm not really sure what he expected, but I have a feeling this was not it.

"Here." I tell him as I hand him a muck rake. "Start cleaning."

"Are you kidding me?" He asks as he looks into my eyes.

"Does it look like I am?" I growl as I put my hands on my hips.

"I'll get shit on my shoes." He whines as he looks down.

"Waa... I have to feed. And watch that one, he kicks." I lie as I walk away with a smile on my face.

"It's okay, horsey..." I hear him saying. "Just don't kick me."

I go on with my work, making sure that he does his own. I quickly let the horses out and began helping clean the stalls. He cannot do it. He has absolutely no skills. But the fun has just begun. I walk over and take the rake out of his hand.

"What?" He asks as he looks at me.

"You suck at this. I need you to fill my trough." He begins to laugh. "I did not mean that in a porny way! See that five gallon bucket... Start filling." I say quickly.

"Where is it?" He asks as he flips the water hydrant on.

"On the west side of the barn." I mutter as I turn my head and silently chuckle to myself. It wasn't long before he comes back in in a huff. "What's wrong?" I ask with a giggle.

"The fucking fence shocked me! And that thing... It's huge!" He spits out.

"Just 150 gallons. It won't take any time at all." I tell him frankly.

"30 trips! Don't you have a hose?" He asks as he looks at the hose before him.

"It's frozen. Get to work." I demand as I look at the bucket in his hand. "And it cuts down on time, if you fill another while you are dumping."

"He grumbles before he gets to work. The crazy thing is, he is doing it. If it were me, it would be a simple fuck off, do it yourself. But he goes to work, And he continues to work. He fills all 150 gallons. Then I put him to work dumping the wheelbarrows of manure. Just a quick 200 yard trek through the rutty, four inch with snow deep land to the manure pile. I watch as he makes the three trips, falling all over the place, almost breaking his leg. So much fun.

"Can we go?" Mark asks as he walks out of the wind, and into the barn. "Please?"

"Yeah, we can go." I agree as I let him lead the way. Then it hits me. It's the bit of evil in my veins. The devil within. I grab the five and a half foot lunge whip, with the six foot lash. I can't help it. I raise it up and crack it on his leg. I know it stings, but it won't kill him.

"What the fuck!" He yells as I continue to beat him. It really shouldn't be this much fun, but damn-it if it isn't. "That's it!"

"Hey!" I yell as he runs after me, chasing me down the aisle, somehow tacking me to the ground. We wrestle around for awhile. I have to. He is the best way to get out my frustrations. He quickly rips it from my hand and gives me several good cracks. I really shouldn't enjoy it. But I do. I like a little pain with my pleasure. I would find that out later.

And that was how it was. That was my first introduction to my new cousin. He was immature, but apparently, so was I. He was fun. He was adventurous. He was kind to me, even when I treated him like shit. He made me remember what it was to be a kid, even when I missed my own childhood.

I'll never admit it, but when he left, I was sad. I knew I would miss him. And I did. It was like a void in my life. All the fun and torture was gone. The beatings and the wrestling. I would miss it. But that wasn't the point of the story. Mark was just an avenue to the prize. I would see Mark again in the summer. I would see him when I went to his house. And there I would meet him.

Him? He is the man next to me. That man that has taken me over. The man that has changed everything. He makes me look at life a little differently. He makes me feel things I never felt. The tingle in my core. The burning desire of that thick cock buried deep inside. He has the ability to make me scream his name as I claw his back. He make me cum at a touch. That is the one I speak of.

"What are you doing?" Derek asks as I type frantically.

"Uh, nothing." I tell him as I glance over.

"And what do you want to do?" He asks as he runs his hand over my bare thigh. The touch of his soft, strong hand takes me over. I gasp as he feathers his fingers over my wet mound. Shit. This is what he does. I spread my legs for him. I need him like air. "This?" He asks as he sticks his fingers under my panties and tickles my clit.

Uh... I think I have to go... Wouldn't you like to know!