I think about how it might have been.

-Reason Why by Rachael Yamagata

Sebastian wakes up. He leaves his bed and surveys his reflection. He had his alarm set at 10 a.m. but it's only 7 a.m.. He doesn't go back to sleep. He feels nervous. He tries not to, but he does.

He doesn't go back to sleep. He heads to the bathroom and takes a bath. He shaves. He eats. He wears his favorite suit.

He waits.

He checks his watch.

He waits.

He gets a drink.

He waits.

He calls Blaine.

He waits.

He eats. Barely.

The sun sets.

He waits.

Kathryn's room goes cold.

He waits.

The door opens.

He stands up.

Only Blaine.

Where is she? He asks.

Blaine doesn't say anything. He only gives Sebastian the platinum rosary.

Where is she? He asks, this time louder.

Blaine shakes his head slightly.

She's gone, Valmont.

Where? Fists clench the beads press against his skin. Where is she, Blaine?

I don't know.

Yes, you do.

No, I don't.

Sebastian hits him. Again and again and again. They are on the floor. Hit punch bruise pain.

Where is she? Sebastian yells. The rosary is wrapped around his knuckles. Blood and platinum.

She disappeared at the airport. She left this. I think she wants you to have it.

You know where she is, you know it and you just won't tell me!

Hit. Hit. Hit.

Blaine's face: cracked and broken. He doesn't talk. He only looks at Sebastian.

Goddamn you, Tuttle. Sebastian yells.

Blaine remains silent.

It is as if the strength is suddenly sucked out of his body. Sebastian's shoulders slump. He gets off Blaine.

Goddamn you, he whispers. His hands go to his face, he grabs his hair and tugs slightly. You should have never let her go.

He repeats this several times.

You should have never let her go.

His voice grows softer, softer.

You should have never let her go.

They remain silent in Kathryn's cold room.

After a while, Blaine speaks.

Do you think she's going to come back? You know, for revenge?

Sebastian opens his eyes. You don't get it, do you?

Blaine remains lying on the floor, staring at the ceiling. He takes a cigarette and puts it between his split lips, lighting it. His eye is swollen. He squints a little.

Enlighten me, Blaine says wryly.

Sebastian looks at him.

She's not coming back.

Why not? It isn't her style at all.

It's exactly her style. Leaving me is the best possible revenge.

Sebastian's hand shakes slightly.

Blaine lights a cigarette and hands it to him.

Sebastian puffs on his cigarette for a while.

They smoke two packs.


It is night.

Blaine has left.

Sebastian places the rosary in his pocket.

He takes his shoes off.

And his socks.

He loosens his tie.

He goes to her bed, pulls the blankets and shivers.

He waits.

He waits.

A/N: The end. Yes, it's the end. I don't know if anybody noticed but this story actually has the same plot as In Absentia. Only that one consisted of conversations and the lack of physical contact, whereas this one had a lack of dialogue between KS. I was curious as to writing a fic wherein they don't actually talk. As for the writing style, basically I wanted to see what I can get away with. So I know it's not my usual style, but it's growing on me.

This Reader Traffic is really something. I know, I know. I already mentioned this. It's just I never knew how far this thing reached. Thanks for those of you who dropped a review and let me know where you're from. Still very surreal to imagine someone from Spain or Romania reading this right now, but apparently, wonders never cease. :-)

Vintage Elle: Funny you should say that, actually I came across Frey's book (My Friend Leonard) and I had heard about the whole controversy thing with his other book so I decided, okay let's try him out. I was pleasantly surprised at the writing style, hurrah I'm not alone in the world. I don't really write like this in real life, though I wish I could. I'm less fragmented and more restrained because I've always thought that it was a no-no or something in fiction, so it was nice to see an author do it (and get away with it). But I know what you're talking about. I just look at everything I've done before this and I think it's all overkill.

NeptunesBlue: I'd definitely start with drabbles, as a warm up of sorts. I'm hardly the best person to give you advice on this one, but if I could do it all over, I'd start with something small to get a feel of the characters. I'm looking forward to reading your work.

B: Actually this is the shortest chapter you've read from me. It only has 470+ words. I've gotten sick of my excessiveness. Maybe I don't want to be a word whore anymore.

Jude-lost: Hi back! Since the beginning? Yikes. Haha, well I'm glad you like the stories (even the ones that suck) and I hope you keep on reading!

Iris: Thanks very much!