A/N: Hello Everybody

A/N: Hello Everybody. Alright, Chapter Five isn't going so well. I'll get an idea and each time I go too write something down I get Writer's Block. Brilliant, right? So it might be a couple weeks before I update again, sort of like last chapter but I'm actually letting you guys know instead of leaving you hanging for a month. See, I can be nice. Also, love me, instead of posting just a plain old Authors Note I've given you guys a story completely independent of INP that I'm sure you'll love.

Rating: M

Pairing: Measley

Type: Oneshot

The Prostate Exam:

Light filtered in through the windows, lighting up the wood flooring and illuminating the white walls.

Inside this room, just waking up, lay the youngest male Weasley, yawning and stretching in his bed. Sighing contently he looked over at his clock. 10:39 am. Ron rubbed his eyes and clambered out of bed, heading out into the living room.

"'Bout time you woke up." Harry said, untying the letter from an owl's leg then giving the bird a treat.

"Hey, not all of us can get up at as early as you." Ron said, going into the kitchen.

"I got up two hours ago. This letters for you by the way."

"Like I said, freak. What's it say?" Ron asked, pouring himself a glass of orange juice.

"You have a…prostate exam." Harry chuckled.

"What's so funny about that?"


Ron didn't know if his ears were just deceiving him this morning but that statement sounded oddly smug.

"Oh, mate, you better hurry! It's at 11:00." Harry said, voice slightly panicky.

"Oh bloody hell." Ron cursed, running into his room and changing into a pair of jeans and an orange Chudley Cannons t-shirt.

Rushing through his daily routine he struggled to put on his socks, brush his teeth, and put his shoes on at the same time.

Harry looked at his watch and furrowed his eyebrows.

"Sorry mate but I don't think you're going to make it. It's already 10:52."

"Oh sod it all." Ron groaned and tore his way through the apartment and almost rippedthe door off its hinges on his way out.

Harry looked down at the letter and smirked.

"That poor bastard." Harry muttered and smirked before going back to his newspaper.


Ron panted and gasped as he burst through the waiting room doors to St. Mungos only three minutes late. With the help of a little magic he managed to arrive (sort of) in time.

He dashed to the receptionist desk, clutching at the counter as he gulped for air.

"I have a prostate exam!" Ron yelled.

Giggles arose from the people in the waiting room and the receptionist tried to hide a smile. Ron had a strong suspicion that he was missing something very important.

"Mr. Weasley?"

Ron nodded.

"Okay, looks like you can go right on back. Room A113."

"Um…Okay. Thank you." Ron said and headed back to the examination room.

The room was completely white with a little window to one side. It looked out onto the grounds surrounding the building and Ron sat contently on the examination bed, swinging his legs back and forth and looking at the trees and people bustling around outside.

Everybody was moving around in perfect synch together. Morphing into each other to form one giant blob. It reminded Ron of those dramatic movies you always see where the main characters always wondering down a busy street going ten times slower than everyone around him and having a mental breakdown. Those things are always so dramatic and sad in the movies but Ron bet if you actually witnessed it in person it would probably be really funny.

Don't get him wrong, it'd be sad, of course, but picture it. You're walking down the street and you see this guy in a business suit, shirt untucked, coat missing, hair sticking up in random places, walking down the street in a daze and bumping into everybody. Then, suddenly, he crumples to the ground and starts crying and screaming. You wouldn't thinking, oh, he lost everything near and dear to him and all he needs is a hug. No, you'd be thinking/yelling something more along the lines of "OH MY GOD, GET AWAY FROM THE CRAZY MAN!! RUN AWAY!! HE'S HAVING A BREAKDOWN!! OH NO HE'S GOING TO KILL US ALL!!"

"Well, hello Weasel. Long time no see."

Ron died. Ron died and he'd gone to hell for thinking other people's misery is funny because there's no way that he could be so unlucky that this was actually happening to him.

Gulping nervously, Ron turned his head to see Ultimate Doom standing to his right and wearing a lab-coat.

"Malfoy?" Ron squeaked.

Standing beside him was the former bane of his existence. The long, lean, tall former bane of his existence. The very muscular, long, lean, tall former bane of his existence that somehow managed to pull off silver rimmed glasses. Not spectacles, but glasses. Because spectacles would sound too nerdy to describe what Draco was wearing. Harry had certainly never looked that good in glasses. Now what Harry wore? Those were spectacles. Not that Harry looked bad in them mind you but….um…Ron didn't know where he was going with this but he decided to just stop before it got really out of hand. Sometimes he really worried for himself.

"That's Dr. Malfoy to you." Malfoy smirked, setting Ron's chart down on the counter.

"You're a Healer?"

"Ironic, isn't it?"

"Yeah…Wow. I always thought you'd be Supreme Dark Overlord of something."

"I tried but nobody would hire me."

Ron blinked and couldn't help the small smile that came to his lips. Hey, could you blame him? Malfoy made a joke and it was actually funny! STOP JUDGING HIM!!

"Take your shirt off."

Ron froze and his eyes went wide.


"Take your shirt off. I need to listen to your heart beat." Draco said, gesturing with his stethoscope.

"Can't you listen to it with my shirt on?"

"I could but I think it would be too small for me."

Merlin! Another joke? How was Malfoy doing this?! If he didn't stop he'd kill himself. Didn't he know that Malfoy's can't handle joy? Maybe he's on something. He is a healer…probably hopped up on potions.

Ron was suddenly assaulted by a picture of Malfoy laying on the floor in the supply closet, surrounded by vials and a line of drool dribbling down his face.

Malfoy sighed.

"Weasel, come on, I don't have time for this."

"No, I don't want to." Ron said, looking ahead of him and crossing his arms.

"Quit being a child." Malfoy said from beside him, voice revealing his frustration.

"I am not "being a child."" Ron exclaimed, mocking Malfoy. "I just don't want to take my shirt off."

There was a moment of silence and Ron was sure he'd won this argument. That was until Draco moved in front of him, stepping between his dangling legs.

Ron gulped and looked up at Draco, breath hitching as their eyes met.

"Either you take it off or I take it off for you." Draco said, running a hand suggestively over Ron's thigh.

"I..I'll do it." Ron muttered and almost killed himself for stuttering.

"That's what I thought." Draco smirked, but he still didn't move.

Ron slowly brought his hands to the hem of his shirt and, in what seemed like slow motion, lifted it upwards, revealing his torso to Draco's hungry eyes. Not that Ron noticed.

Ron bit his lip and looked down at the floor as Draco pressed the cold metal to his chest.

Draco observed as the little red-head shifted around uncomfortably one the little hospital bed, face flushed and heart pounding through the stethoscope. The Healer smirked as he watched Ron chew on his bottom lip, brain flooded with dirty thoughts.

Ron glanced up at the blond through his eye lashes and his breath hitched. The way Malfoy's eyes were looking at him, all dark and half lidded, made Ron's blood run hot.

"You know, Mr. Weasley." Draco said, taking the stethoscope off and tossing it onto the counter. "I think…just to be safe, I should give you a complete physical."

"..M-Malfoy?" Ron squeaked, eyes wide.

"Please, call me Dr. Malfoy." Draco smirked.

"Dr. Malfoy." Ron said, cheeks staining a bright shade of red. That was probably one of the hottest things he'd ever heard and he decided he just might really want to say it again.

As Draco smashed their lips together he decided that he really liked being a Doctor.

Ron clutched at Draco's lab coat, moaning as Draco's tongue slid along his lips. Ron opened his mouth and Draco's tongue slipped into his mouth, licking and massaging against Ron's. It was the most pleasurable and dizzying sensations Ron had ever felt before.

A hand massaged its way up Ron's chest, pinching and massaging his nipple while the other one clutched at his hip.

"Oh." Ron gasped, breaking the kiss and tucking his head in Draco's neck.

Draco bent his head down, nipping and sucking on Ron's shoulder.

Ron let out a gasp as the taller boy pushed him down onto the bed. He gulped as Draco bent forward, back arching up in surprise when the movement caused an unbelievable friction between their erections.

Draco's tongue ran a hot trail up his stomach, licking his way along the quivering flesh until it moved to his chest, capturing a nipple between his lips and sucking on it.

Ron's eyes slipped shut and his mouth opened in a silent cry.

Ron's body writhed and spasmed as Draco continued to feast on it, kissing him on every possible surface. Draco continued to torture him until Ron was a moaning, needy mess.

"Now…Mr. Weasley." Draco gasped out, gazing down at Ron lasciviously. "Everything up here seems to be in order, but I still have to examine the rest of your body." Draco said, running a finger along the front of Ron's jeans.

"Oh merlin…." Ron moaned, clutching at Draco's arms desperately. "Please…Dr. Malfoy just…"

"Just what, Ron?" Draco whispered into Ron's ear, giving a little grind of his hips.

"Fuck me." Ron cried out desperately.

"With pleasure."

Draco's hands wondered down to Ron's jeans, pulling them off and Ron's Chudley Cannon boxers ("Really, Ron?" "Shut up, Draco.") And drinking in the view.

Ron was repositioned so that he stood with his back to Draco, hands clutching onto the hospital bed as Draco lowered one lubed finger to his entrance, pushing in gently.

Ron's breath hitched and he tensed as he felt the finger entering him.

"Relax." Draco whispered, nibbling on his earlobe.

Draco's other hand found its way to Ron's erection, teasing it gently.

Draco thrust his finger in and out of Ron, soon adding another one. Twisting and probing Draco found the spot that made Ron scream in pleasure.

Ron moaned as felt Draco add a third finger, biting his lip and clutching at the bed desperately. He was in a complete state of disarray caused by the pleasure Draco was giving him and yet Draco was the only thing keeping him grounded.

Ron gave a groan of disappointment as Draco removed his fingers, waiting with bated breath as Draco positioned himself at Ron's entrance.

Slowly, very slowly, the blond haired boy pushed himself in, stopping every now and then to let Ron adjust to the feeling.

The red haired boy let out a hiss as Draco slowly filled him, trying with all his might to relax. Draco's hand was on him once again, massaging his erection and sending sparks of pleasure through his body as he started to move, thrusting into him gently.

Ron gasped with each thrusts, moans starting to escape him as they got more pleasurable. His senses were over whelmed, invaded with this new sensation. Draco hit his prostate again and Ron nearly melted, thrusting backwards and moaning loudly.


The blond boy began to pick up speed until soon he was pounding into him, both boys gasping and moaning each other's names.

With one last mind-numbing thrust they both came.

Ron let out a whimper as Draco pulled out of him and turned to look at the other boy. Before either of them could say anything Ron's stomach let out a growl that probably could have been heard from China. He smiled sheepishly.

"Didn't eat breakfast this morning." Ron shrugged.

"It is the most important meal of the day." Draco lectured, zipping up his pants. "How about you come back to my place and we can shower and then go out to lunch." Draco said suggestively.

Ron blushed.


"Is that a yes."

"Maybe. But…um…What about the uh…mess." Ron asked, gesturing to the bed only to see that where there should have been…well… you know, there wasn't. "Hey..what…?"

"It's a hospital, Ron. There's a spell that sort of…takes care of the mess for us. Keeps everything sanitary."

"Oh…Okay." Ron shrugged. "Well just let me get my….Draco?"

"Hmmm?" Draco said from where he was grabbing Ron's chart off the counter.

"Where're my clothes?"


"Oh bloody hell."

"Maybe there in the laundry room?"

"I am never having sex with you again."

"Oh, come on. Weasley, don't be like that!"

A/N: Alrighty. Well, there you have it. Amazing story for all my little reviewers. Don't worry, they found Ron's clothes. They WERE in the laundry room. Though it was awkward having to explain how they got there to the nurses. Yeah, I know it wasn't the best sex scene ever but I got lazy. Plus now you have lower expectations so when you finally get the Measley sex you deserve you don't actually expect it to be good. But believe me. It's good. I already wrote it. Ooooh, if only you knew what you were missing. Don't worry, it'll be Chapter Seven so it's most definitely not that far away.

Oh wait, I almost forgot:

"Hey Ron. How was the appointment." Harry greeted as Ron finally stepped into the apartment at 6:00 pm.

"It went pretty well." Ron said, blushing.

"Well that certainly took awhile. Did they find anything wrong?" Harry asked.

"No. I just ran into an old friend." Ron said, keeping his eyes averted.

"Really? Anyone I know?"

"Yeah. But it's not important. Hey, Harry? What's a Prostate Exam?"

"You're kidding right?"


"You just had one didn't you?"

"Well…yeah, but it was a bit fuzzy."

"Hmmmm…Well I suppose I could give you a demonstration."

"Really?" Ron said hopefully.

"Yeah. But you're going to need to take your pants off." Harry said with a smirk that was eerily reminiscent of Malfoy.


THE END!! ….FOR NOW, MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA!! Yep, everyone wants to get into poor Ronniekins pants.