"This is going perfectly, Ryuuk," Light said as he carefully styled his hair. "Not even L could have found me with this disguise."
"Hyuk hyuk…y'know, most humans would lay low after killing the top three detectives in the world," Ryuk said, chuckling.
Light snapped his head to the side to stare at the shinigami. "Do not call me human, Ryuuk. I. Am. GOD!!"
Ryuuk actually shrunk back a little. "All right, Light…whatever you say…" He had learned that Light, after killing L, had developed even more of a god complex, and Light-with-a-god-complex was almost scarier than the King Shinigami. And he was pretty freaking scary.
Light's not nearly as fun anymore…but he's still got the book, so I gotta stick around, Ryuuk thought. Oh, well…as long as he doesn't laugh any time soon, we're good.
After his explosion, Light tilted his head back. Ryuuk almost ducked for cover; this was the typical "I'm-about-to-do-my-maniacal-Kira-laugh" pose. Luckily for him, though, Light took a small bottle and put a drop of liquid into each of his eyes.
"Damn, this is annoying," he muttered, blinking several times. Instead of dark brown, now his eyes were an unnaturally bright blue.
Ryuuk suddenly remembered a question he had been wanting to ask Light for a while. "Hey, Light…how did you end up killing him? I never saw."
There was a knock at the door.
"I'll tell you later, Ryuuk," Light muttered. To the person behind the door, he said, in perfect, unaccented English, "Yeah? What is it?"
"It's almost time for scene 14," the stage manager said from the other side of the door. "They need you in hair and make-up."
"All right, I'll be there in a sec," Light said.
"Oh, and, after this scene, there's a few contest winners who'd like to talk to you, too."
"Okay…it's Denise, right?" he asked. He could feel the stage manager's huge smile through the door.
"Yes, it is! This is the first time you've remembered since the first movie!"
"Sorry about that. I just get caught up in my work, y'know?"
"Of course, of course. See you in five!"
Light smiled wickedly as he heard Denise the stage manager walk away.
"Hyuk hyuk…I think you're being too polite, Light," Ryuuk said. Light shrugged.
"Whatever. Everyone else in the cast likes it. Oh, right, you want to see how I killed him."
Light took a small, Flathead screwdriver from his pocket and wedged the tip between the mirror and the wall. He gently pushed the screwdriver, using it like a lever to ease the mirror about an inch away from the wall. Putting down the screwdriver and holding the mirror, he stuck his free hand inside and pulled out his Death Note, then pressed the mirror back against the wall.
He started flipping through it, but Ryuuk stopped him.
"Hang on…a lot of those people aren't criminals," he said.
"They're paparazzi. That's worse. Ah, here we are." Light held the Death Note out to Ryuuk, who took it and started chuckling as he read the death.
Zachary Efron. February 3, 2010, 12:25 a.m.
Wanders home in a drunken stupor, but is kidnapped by a crazed fanboy on the way. Can't stand it any longer, commits suicide at 4:37 p.m.
"Why a fanboy and not a fangirl?" Ryuuk asked.
"Because fanboys are scarier," Light replied simply.
"All right, but how do you know that they won't find his body?"
Light pointed at the death. "Notice I said crazed fanboy. Said fanboy would keep the body."
At Ryuuk's silence, Light chuckled. "I thought you said humans were fun, Ryuuk."
"…and sometimes…they're downright freaky…"
Near sighed as he heard the television blasting in the next room. Twirling a curl of white-blond hair between his fingers, he walked in. As was expected, "High School Musical: Search for the Next Star" was on, with Gevanni watching intensely. Though Gevanni was a great agent and very intelligent, Near could not help but question his sanity at times, especially when he heard "B Good 2 Me" from his agent's car.
"Gevanni…must I remind you that we have to search for Kira?" Near asked dryly.
"I know, I know, but they're having a star from HSM come! I have to see this, sir!"
"…don't you have this saved, Gevanni?"
"Yeah, but we finally have some free time, so I wanted to watch it."
"Gevanni…this is incredibly juvenile…"
"But I like it. Why don't you watch it with me? Remember, you owe me."
"Why on earth do I 'owe you'?" Near asked in a monotone.
"Because you cut off half of my Sharpay figurine's hair because you wanted to make a small replica of Misa Amane because you thought she was the second Kira. But she doesn't even look like Ashley Tisdale!"
Near was about to argue when the announcer on the show boomed, "And back to High School Musical: Search for the Next Star!"
Gevanni gasped excitedly. "They're gonna show who it is! I'll bet you anything it's Monique Coleman. She's not doing anything right now, and…" Gevanni stopped as he looked at the screen. "HOLY CRAP!! IT'S ZAC FREAKING EFRON!!"
Near winced. Gevanni did not normally exclaim things, but when he did, it usually threatened to make Near's ears bleed.
"Gevanni, if I may ask you to keep your voice…"
"Hold on a sec." Gevanni grabbed the remote and rewound the show. He pressed play, then listened intently. He pulled a face. "Those liars! That's not Zac Efron!"
Near cocked his head. "How can you tell?"
"Well, here, listen." Gevanni pressed rewind again, then played it. Both he and Near listened. Gevanni shook his head. "Yeah, hear that? For one thing, his voice is a fourth of an octave higher. And…there's this weird sound to it…it sounds kinda…I don't know…maniacal, I guess."
Hmm…it sounds a little familiar… Near thought. It kind of reminds me of the second L…
Gevanni heaved an annoyed sigh. "First they put off production on HSM 3 for two years because Corbin Bleu just had to come out of the closet and Disney had to reshoot everything, but now they're using fake Zacs? This is just wrong! I mean, he doesn't even look like Zac Efron! Not that the drooling fanboys and girls notice. But, look! His eyes are more almond-shaped, and his face is thinner! Come on, Disney, have some self-respect! Next they're gonna have Mitchell Musso try to be Joe Jonas, huh?"
Near rolled his eyes. "Gevanni, I'm sorry to cut your rant short, but I believe I need to have a chat with the N.P.A., and I need you there with me."
Gevanni exited and turned the television off. "All right, sir. I can wait. But next time, I'm fast forwarding all the parts with that Zac-wannabe."
He got to his feet and followed Near back to the computer room. Near took his microphone and pressed the transmission button.
"Hello, L," he said coolly. "It's been a while since we last spoke, and I expect you've found more information about Kira, correct?"
He waited for an answer. After a while, the L insignia finally popped up on the screen. However, the voice who answered was definitely not L's.
"Um…he's not here right now. Actually, he's in America right now, but he wouldn't tell us why…"
Near sighed. "Then who's this talking right now?"
"Oh, this is Matsuda."
"Mr. Matsuda, when did L leave?"
"Oh, jeez…around the end of season three of High School Musical: Search for the Next Star…"
Near could very distinctly hear several groans in the background. To his surprise, Gevanni grabbed the mic from his hand.
"You watch 'High School Musical: Search for the Next Star'?! I didn't know you guys got it in Japan!"
"Gevanni…" Near groaned.
"Oh, yeah! I mean, I have to pay for it…and I have to watch it with subtitles…but whatever! It's my favorite show!"
"Matsuda, give me the mic!" a new voice said. There was a crackling sound, suggesting that someone had roughly grabbed the microphone. "God, you sound like my daughter!"
"Hey! Aizawa, let go!"
"N doesn't want to talk about that! We're trying to find Kira, remember?"
"Oh, that's okay! See, I'm not N. I'm Gevanni. So, Mr. Matsuda, how stoked are you for HSM 3?"
"Beyond stoked! I can't wait to see Zanessa in action!"
Gevanni's jaw dropped. "You're a Zanessa fan?"
"Yeah, they're the perfect couple!"
"No way! Zashley totally beats them!"
"You're crazy! Zanessa is meant to be!"
Gevanni rolled his eyes, then excitedly continued, "Anyway, did you see the last 'Search for the Next Star'? That totally wasn't Zac Efron!"
"I know! Y'know, I could've sworn that it was Light with blue eyes!"
"Matsuda!" several voices snapped.
"Light? Who's that?" Gevanni asked.
"Oh, right. You guys know him as L…"
"Whoops…sor—!" Suddenly, the transmission was cut off, and the L background faded back to black.
"Well, Gevanni, seems like you made a new friend today while you completely ruined any chance of getting Kira information in that transmission," Rester said angrily.
Gevanni swallowed nervously. "I…" he started, but Near cut him off.
"No, actually. Gevanni's adolescent chat with Mr. Matsuda may help us." Near twirled a curl of hair between his fingers. "Gevanni, where would Mr. Efron be right now?"
"Um…Hollywood, I'm guessing," Gevanni said. "Or near Zuma Beach in California."
"All right," Near said. He went to a drawer and opened it, pulling out a Troy doll.
"Hey, isn't that mi—?!" Gevanni trailed off in horror as Near popped the head off his doll.
"I think I've got a plan to find Kira," Near said. "We'll fly to California tomorrow. First, though, I need to make a call to an old friend…
A/N -- Don't tell me none of you weren't expecting a fic about how much Zac Efron looks like Light Yagami! Okay…so you guys probably weren't. Well, sorry for how freakishly AU it is…but I had to write this. Especially with HSM 3 coming out in a few months shudders Anyway, the next chapter should be up soon. Reviews to me is like eyeliner to an emo kid: pure joy! (Or, at least, as joyful as an emo kid can get…)