AN: Okay. This is awful. But the idea plagued me. Just so you know: THIS IS A ONE-SHOT. THERE WILL BE NO MORE!! DO NOT ASK FOR IT!! Anyways, I don't own them, or anything, really, and this is men having sex, so beware. Oh. I kinda gave it away. Sorry lovelies. Love you, please, please, please review! And read Kamen. And Marks.
Summary: Cloud feels a horrible forbidden longing for his Sensei, who only seems to wish he wasn't alive…
Can hate be a mask for desire...even love?
"Only For You Sensei…"
"Boku no sugata ga miemasu ka?
Kono tozasareta sekai nara
Anata ni mo kono koe ga todoiteiru hazu
Can you see my figure?
If it's this closed off world
My voice should even reach you
Boku no kokoro ga miemasu ka?
Mou nido to hanasanai kara
Karappo no kono hako ni modoshite...
Can you see my heart?
Because I won't let go again
I'll return to my empty shell... "
--Gackt C. "Cube"
Cloud tried the kata one last time, but he couldn't quite seem to pull it off. He sighed and lowered his practice sword. He would never get this, and was now doubting how sincere he had truly been about coming here to this school. It was a unit of the Japanese army that focused mainly on sword defense and training. It had sounded like a great idea at first; fleeing from the home of a neglectful mother to come here and train with the best and try to shake his reputation back home of being the weakling.
He was only ten-and-eight years, but he knew his ambitions well, and knew this was the place to be to realise them. He worked day up and day out to get them right under the biggest hard-ass in the country. His name was Sephiroth and he had been the teacher of their class of twenty from the beginning and just from that beginning he had seemed to hate Cloud. Cloud had no idea what he had done to deserve the merit of General Sephiroth's, the greatest warrior in the nation, most despised student, but the hate had been from almost day one. Cloud remembered back to his first day, and when it had all started.
He had heard of Sephiroth of course, his name was almost household, and as he emerged he had expected nothing short of some kind of massive, solid, general. A stereotypical hard-ass. And yet his visions had been destroyed as the man emerged from the building that housed the higher up officers. The man was astounding. Physically, that is. Tall, intimidating, and breath-taxingly gorgeous. Cloud felt as if someone had punched his diaphragm and he had lost all of his breath. He inhaled quickly once his brain screamed for air in order to process what he saw before him.
He was a shock with abnormally long, waist-length silvery hair almost the colour of a spider's web when covered with dripping morning dew. His face was gently made, the cheekbones high and aristocratic with slim lips that were slightly darker then the rest of his pale, marble skin which glowed in the sunlight, almost as if he were some kind of angelic beacon.
The soft face was hardened with hard severity creases and his eyes, which he supposed in their gleaming shade of the most startling green (which he wouldn't lie, stole his breath once more), should have been shimmering twin galaxies, were really just dulled somehow. As though as calloused as the rest of him and strained with his position. They should have been beautiful, but he seemed as if a veil had been dropped over something so beautiful from some kind of misplaced environment. He did not belong here. And yet he was the greatest, the most powerful, the most frightening, and surely the best in the nation. Like a gorgeous diamond butterfly trapped in a venomous spider's web.
Cloud wondered what it would like if he had found this man as a simple peasant somewhere in some small, remote, village without the hardened skin of his profession. Would he be even more glorious and without all the years of darkness that was so apparent in him? Nothing about him was simple though.
He spoke softly, but Cloud knew everyone heard him clearly. He drove them into the ground with their training, and at the end of the day Cloud noticed him watching him specifically. More specifically then anyone else. His heart hammered, and his breath quickened. Just having the man's eyes on him made him feel incredulous. As if he were undeserving, but somehow ecstatic. His blood burned.
Cloud would again be honest, he had hoped, for some wild tendril of a thought had popped into his mind that was so incredibly ridiculous he had to almost laugh at it, and yet some part of him hoped more then anything it was not insanity from exhaustion that made him think this, that the General watched him with interest. But he was his Sensei and the position of sensei and student was so sacred…
And Cloud found this even more exciting with a small shiver. It almost made him take his mind off the fact that he was doing atrocious in the practice. It was obvious he was behind everyone else in the class. Which was depressing, but those luminous eyes cheered him somewhere within that he had never been enlightened to before.
His heart jumped into his throat when the General requested to see him after practice, calling him into the Superior's building. He took him into what could only be his office. He motioned for Cloud to take a seat while he sat behind a rather large carved desk that was simply beautiful, although it paled in comparison to its' owner. He steepled his fingers on his chin while Cloud fiddled, fixing him with his stare that burned Cloud's skin right into his inner desires, which were sparked as well.
Cloud bowed awkwardly, lowering his head in respect, which Sephiroth acknowledged with a nod, still never looking away from Cloud. Still, he remained silent, watching, assessing, which drove Cloud insane. He cleared his throat softly and murmured: "Yes Sensei?" Sephiroth waited a moment, in which Cloud was sure his heartbeats were magnified, and he could hear them clearly, before his deep, cavernous voice replied: "You have no talent Strife. I question your ability to sustain the level of training I will be giving you. I will let you live out this week and if I see no improvement I will be sending you home. I will meet with you at this week's end to let you know my decision." He let this sink in, still watching him, and Cloud felt his heart cracking. His hopes dropped into his feet with his heart and his mouth.
'What a prick!' his mind cried. He had no idea how to response, so he settled with a quick response and escape in order to let out the tears that had sprung into his eyes. "Yes Sensei…" His voice almost cracked, but luckily, as if on auto-pilot he was able to rise and leave the office, still with his eyes locked onto him. He shut the door silently then took off running, never looking back.
Several hours later after a storm of tears and emotion in the trees and forest surrounding the area he had calmed down enough outside to assess the chaos inside. He rolled onto his side looking up into the starry night barely visible in the deserted clearing between the tree-tops. Those eyes flashed before him. He would not be defeated. So what if he craved him...probably loved him? He was a cruel bastard, undeserving, and Cloud would not be scared away. He would fight.
He returned to his room, grabbed his practice sword they had just received earlier that day, and worked until dawn, past all forms of pain and exhaustion, and mastered the moves they had learned in class that day. The next day the General, his Sensei, watched him yet again, making Cloud's desires spike, but he worked through it. He criticised him every moment he found, and with a permanently fixed frown Cloud obeyed his commands, only to be ridiculed more. It was torture, and the other students noticed. They teased him, but eventually pitied him and began to slowly befriend him.
Cloud shook his head clearing it of the past memories. He had been here for months and things had become more difficult. He still suffered from his Sensei feeling hatred of him, from some unknown source, simply because he existed. He made his life absolute hell, but forced Cloud to work harder. And to cry. He had shed so many tears and no matter how many times he tried to convince himself, talk himself out of it, remind himself of his unabashed cruelty, scream, shout, rage and sob, the man would not get out of his system. It was a venomous desire that could not be quenched.
He barely slept, ate little, and practised more then was healthy. But he was good. He had gotten better, and the General had noticed. He had not met him at the end of that first week, but had humiliated him, ridiculed him, tortured him from then on. He had paid for his success. He wanted him to be a million miles away from him. On a different planet, and yet he also craved to be so close to him their skin melded together. His gorgeous skin, so stark white, slicked against Cloud's hot, warm, sweet. Sephiroth holding Cloud tightly while he claimed him, pushing inside of him so deeply he-
His horribly wrong, horribly erotic thoughts were interrupted by a rustling in the bushes near the clearing. Cloud raised his sword, ready to defend himself, but the person who emerged shocked him so much it fell from his calloused hands. He bowed automatically and choked out: "Sensei." in greeting.
Sephiroth watched him, as he always did, so mysteriously. Cloud met his eyes, full-on, for once and was surprised to see something new. Perhaps it was the setting, perhaps it was the exhaustion, or maybe it was the moonlight, but the usual emotion he saw there that he had always thought was resentment seemed to be something else tonight. Sephiroth seemed to be more intimidating tonight, never as he had seen before; in a new way he had never seen before. He took a step back. "Sensei is something wrong?" he asked, feeling it was a necessary question.
Sephiroth took a deep breath, sighed, then ran a hand through his hair. He looked positively human for once in all the time Cloud had seen him. The hardness softened just slightly.
"I have no idea what compels me to reveal myself. What drives me to even be here." Cloud's eyes widened. What was going on here? Was the General opening up to him somehow? 'What the hell brought this on?' Cloud questioned, incredulous. "When I saw you that first day...nothing extraordinary struck me about you. But you just...have this look about you. And I couldn't shake it, it unnerved me. I didn't like it, didn't want to be compelled. So I sought you out and crushed your spirit. Or so I thought. Next thing I knew you were stronger, and empowered, the opposite of what I wanted I wanted you to leave me, but you were moving in closer now. I couldn't ever take my eyes off of you, now that you glow like you do. I am your sensei and I cannot violate this...I cannot...but I desire you. I need you. I must have you." He had avoided Cloud's eyes through this, which had widened almost as large as the full, pregnant moon above them.
He shook off his shock, albeit difficultly, and closed his gaping mouth. His eyes met Cloud's, and something that was so small and barely prevalent Cloud thought he could have imagined it, was there in those orbs. Fear. Fear of his rejection Cloud realised. He should. He should deny this man. His mind was set in this idea, but his libido and heart screamed otherwise. He loved him. This was shocking, and unbelievable, but true. He loved his deeply, and cared deeply, and desired deeply, and he could not turn him away.
He met the General's somehow anxious gaze and realised the emotion that had always been there was that fear, of him, and the same emotion Cloud had tried so hard to deny; love. There it was, plain and simple, and nothing else mattered at that point. It was all he wanted, all he had ever wanted from day one. All of his resentment faded in a moment and his lips parted, mouth dry, to whisper in volumes:
"Take me Sensei…"
Sephiroth's eyes widened, and a moment later he seemed to accept Cloud's approval and swept forward to crush him into his arms and capture his lips in a fierce, powerful kiss that unleashed everything they had both felt for so many months. Cloud knew then Sephiroth had suffered as much as he had. It had been destructive, and now, this, would be salvation. They clung to each other as if they could save each other. They broke apart for air, and before Sephiroth moved in for more Cloud whispered: "Why did you hate me so much?" Sephiroth stopped suddenly and looked deeply into his eyes. His face had softened and that veil had been lifted. He was simple, and, as Cloud had predicted, absolutely stunning. He lost his breath (this man seemed to so able to claim it) as he whispered:
"I never hated you. Ever. I was afraid of you. I couldn't understand what you were, and are, doing to me. I feared you would destroy me. Plus...you're my pupil. I've accepted though...now, that resisting this will only do more damage." Cloud's eyes misted over and he threw caution to the wind whispering back, all choked up: "I love you." Sephiroth smiled, somewhat shakily from misuse, and whispered back: "I love you too." Then he swooped in for another kiss. Cloud stumbled backwards and Sephiroth caught him, pinning him against the tree behind them. His hands moved down Cloud's body causing far too much friction then was necessary and soon he was removing Cloud's shirt. Cloud eagerly fumbled with his, removing it clumsily.
Both took a moment to look at each other. Sephiroth was Adonis personified. He was amazing. Cloud's eyes wide with wonder, lips parted in longing, reached up to slide down, from his wide, broad shoulders, to his smooth alabaster chest. His fingers grazed his nipples making the General hiss as he stroked his stomach. Sephiroth growled then threw Cloud gently to the ground and lay over him. He whispered into his ear: "You're glorious. So beautiful…" Cloud blushed deeply, but whispered back: "Ditto."
Sephiroth gave him a hard kiss, slipping his tongue into Cloud's eager mouth. When Cloud returned the kiss Sephiroth moaned and Cloud felt a shiver run down his body. Sephiroth moved from his honeyed mouth to his neck, laying hot kisses all down him. His hand stroked his chest and stomach as his lips followed suit and soon Cloud was moaning and arching his body into his mouth.
Sephiroth hands moved to his pants, sliding them off a bit awkwardly but soon releasing him to the night air. He stopped again and gazed at him. "So amazing…" he whispered, seemingly awed. He grinned, something highly uncharacteristic, and whispered silkily into Cloud's ear: "You're delicious too." He removed his own pants next and Cloud gasped. Sephiroth chuckled at his surprise and kissed him harder then ever, nibbling on his lip.
He then moved to his shoulder and placed, in an easily hidden place, his mark. He growled when Cloud whimpered. "You're mine." He said harshly into his ear again. "Sephiroth, I need to tell you...I've never been with anyone before." Cloud flushed and couldn't look at him, embarrassed.
Sephiroth lifted his face to meet his eyes. They were warm and inviting, another shock. "Cloud-kun it's okay. I'm glad, that means I truly get to claim you. It only means I need to play with you a bit more." He grinned that grin again that got Cloud's blood boiling, and licked his fingers. "Just relax…" He whispered, then kissed Cloud sweetly, caressing his lips, then mouth, with his experienced tongue.
His fingers slid into Cloud making him hiss and tense, but Sephiroth whispered sweet nothings into his mouth and calmed him down as he tried to loosen him up. Once he was certain it had worked as much as it would he placed himself near Cloud's entrance. The boy looked into his eyes, obviously frightened. "Cloud-kun I love you so much, and this will hurt a little, but I'll be gentle. Just relax." He smiled at him and Cloud nodded, then braced himself.
Sephiroth slid inside of him partially, intending to be slow, but Cloud was so warm and smooth and tight slow turned into a full thrust, burying himself into him. Cloud's cries echoed into the night and Sephiroth moaned and kissed him, tongue thrusting into his soft mouth and he wished to do into his body, but resisted, allowing Cloud to adjust. Soon Cloud was kissing him back and moving his body to signal he was ready.
Sephiroth took a deep breath then pulled out and thrusted back into him. Cloud's cries sounded pained, but after two more strokes quickly turned into pleasure. They built and built, louder and louder, just as Sephiroth's did until he cried out Sephiroth's name and came, Sephiroth only a second later.
Once their orgasms had subsided, Sephiroth pulled out and pulled Cloud into his arms. Cloud was falling into sleep and Sephiroth whispered into his ear softly: "Thank you…" Cloud smiled sleepily and whispered back: "Only for you Sensei…" before drifting into the most comfortable, peaceful, happy sleep he'd had since he first saw his Sensei.
AN2: Yeah. Wrote this in two and a half hours, started at 3 in the morning, so I'm a little tired. I read it over, checked it, but I skimmed cos I'm exhausted, so please PLEASE excuse any mistakes. I'm a freak though, so I'll have it fixed before the week is out. Yeah, the idea wouldn't leave me alone...and I was bored. So here it is. Read my other stories too, they're much better I promise!!
Kurai-Tenshi of Doom ;;