DISCLAIMER: DO I LOOK LIKE I'M LOADED OFFA TWILIGHT TO YOU?! *sob*
Song Used: Just Dance- Lady GaGa
Back at the Cullens…
Back at the Cullens…
"And then.." sniffed Aro, "then they told me I wasn't dance master of the universe!" he let out a small sob and buried his head in his hands.
Carlisle through his hands into the air. "WHAT THE FRICK! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU ARO?! I'M NOT A THERAPIST!"
Aro gasped. "Every-"
"YES, YES, I KNOW!" screamed Carlisle. "EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS A LIE!"
"YOU…YOU… YOUR MEAN!" sobbed Aro. He jumped off the couch and ran out the door, slamming it shut behind him.
Carlisle put his head in his hands. "I'm so stressed…"
"Now, now dear." called Esme. "What did the self help books tell you to do?"
Carlisle sighed and stood up on one leg. "I'm a little tea pot…"
Outside the Cullen's…
"And then, out of nowhere, pixie dust fell, so I bowed down and screamed, 'IMA REINDEER…'" Emmett was telling Jasper.
"Hey," said Jasper, "I'm starting to feel really emo again…"
"Remember what the self-help books taught you." said Emmett kindly.
Sighing, Jasper lifted his leg. "I'm a little tea pot…"
"Hey guys…" sighed Aro, emo-ing over to them.
"Oh," said Emmett, "You can stop now Jasper, it's just Aro."
"HERE IS-" Jasper stopped and looked angry. "YOU KNOW BETTER THAN TO STOP ME AT THE BEST PART OF THE SONG EMMETT!"
"Wtf…?" asked Aro.
"He get's really into it." said Emmett. "Last time he started break dancing."
"Hey Aro…" said Jasper, thinking very VERY hard, is something bothering you?"
"A little." sighed Aro. "You see, it all started when I was 500 years old... And I started taking ballet lessons…"
Back at the Supermarket…
"Can I help you guys?" asked an annoyed employee.
"No, we're good." said Jacob sweetly.
"You guys have been sitting here for 2 hours…" said the employee, "And you haven't done any shopping."
My good man," said Seth, putting his hand on the employee's shoulder, "we ALWAYS come here on Sunday."
"But it's Thursday!" cried the employee.
"Oh," said Sam, scratching his head. "We'll just leave then." And with that they 3 got up and walked out.
"So what now?" asked Seth.
"Let's go bug the Cullens!" said Jacob.
"HUZZAH!" they all cried, and they ventured over yonder forth.
Back at the Cullen's…
"Oh hellz no!" said Jasper. "They said you weren't dance master of the universe?"
"That really fries my potatoes." huffed Emmett. "THE NERVE."
"You know what this calls for?" asked Jasper.
"I THINK I DO BROTHER. I THINK I DO."
"HOLA CULLENS!" shouted Sam waving at them as the werewolfs walked up.
"THOSE WEREWOLFS WONT KNOW WHAT HIT THEM!" laughed Jasper.
"YOU KNOW IT! THERE GONNA BE BLOWN TO A PLACE WHERE THE BUBBLE WRAP DON'T POP AND THEY CAN'T FART PIXIE DUST!" agreed Emmett.
"YOU WANNA GO?!" said Jacob, puffing his chest out.
"RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW." said Jasper, snapping his fingers in a Z.
"BRING IT!" said Sam, popping his collar.
Aro looked scared. "It couldn't be... NO!"
"YES!" said Seth. "WEREWOLF/ VAMPIRE DANCE BATTLE."
And with that the background music started.
"I've had a little bit too much, much/ All of the people start to rush, start to rush by/ A dizzy twisted dance, can't find my drink, oh man/ Where are my keys? I lost my phone, phone." Aro sang, watching Jacob and Jasper make there way onto the dance floor.
"What's going on on the floor?/ I love this record baby but I can't see straight anymore/ Keep it cool, what's the name of this club?/ I can't remember but it's alright, a-alright."
Jasper started out doing the robot, and pointed at Jacob. "Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, gonna be okay, d-d-d-dance/ Dance, dance, just, j-j-just dance."
Jacob started river dancing, then called out Emmett. As Emmett made his way to the middle, he slapped Aro's back and said, "THIS IS ALL FOR YOU MAN!" "Wish I could shut my playboy mouth, oh oh oh-oh/ How'd I turn my shirt inside out? Inside outright/ Control your poison babe, roses have thorns they say/ And we're all getting hosed tonight, oh oh oh-oh."
Jacob switched places with Sam then, who started break dancing while the werewolves clapped and cheered. "What's going on on the floor?/ I love this record baby but I can't see straight anymore/ Keep it cool, what's the name of this club?/ I can't remember but it's alright, a-alright."
As Sam got up from his head spinning epic-ness, he pointed at Aro. Aro's jaw dropped as Jasper and Emmett pushed him onto the floor, in panic, he started doing pirouettes.
"Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, gonna be okay, d-d-d-dance/ Dance, dance, just, j-j-just."
Jacob then pushed Seth onto the floor, who looked almost as panicked as Aro. "When I come through on the dance floor checkin' out that catalog/ Can't believe my eyes, so many women without a flaw/ And I ain't gon' give it up, steady tryin' to pick it up like a car/ I'ma hit it, I'ma hit it and flex and do it until tomorr' yeah/Shawty I can see that you got so much energy/ The way you're twirlin' up them hips 'round and 'round/ And now there's no reason at all why you can't leave here with me/ In the meantime stay and let me watch you break it down."
"And dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, gonna be okay, d-d-d-danceDance, dance, just, j-j-just dance/"
Suddenly, the werewolves and the vampires started doing that crazy thing from west side story. "Half psychotic, sick, hypnotic/Got my blueprint, it's symphonic/ Half psychotic, sick, hypnotic/ Got my blueprint electronic/ Half psychotic, sick, hypnotic/ Got my blueprint, it's symphonic/ Half psychotic, sick, hypnotic/ Got my blueprint electronic."
As they finished, Jake and Jasper made there way back into the middle of their circle, Jasper trying to out jazz- hand Jake. "Go! Use your muscle, carve it out, work it, hustle/ I got it, just stay close enough to get it/ Don't slow! Drive it, clean it, Lysol, bleed it/ Spend the last doughIn your pocko."
Emmett and Sam made there way into the circle ad Jacob and Jasper exited, Emmett doing a pop, lock, and drop.
"Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm."
Lastly, Aro and Seth returned, and started doing the hokey pokey. "Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm/ Just dance, gonna be okay, d-d-d-danceDance, dance, just, j-j-just dance."
As the song ended, everyone struck a pose.
Breathing slightly heavily, Jasper smiled at the werewolves. "You know, you guys aren't half bad."
Jacob smiled proudly. "Leah makes us take dance lessons twice a week."
"Oh!" said Emmett. "You mean with that guy down the street? Yeah, me and Jasper go there sometimes."
"OMFG!" shouted Edward, running down from the house, "WAS THERE JUST AN EPIC DANCE BATTLE OUT HERE?!"
"Yeah," said Seth. "You totally missed it man."
"DAMMIT BELLA!" Edward screamed up to the heavens.
"Hey," said Bella walking up to the house. "Did I just hear my name being shouted up to the heavens?"
"Of course not." said Edward smoothly. "What's in the bag?"
Bella opened her grocery bag she had slung around her wrist. "I bought Jasper some milk."
"MILKY!" squealed Jasper, taking the bottle and going into the kitchen.
Edward shook his head. Gesturing to Jasper, he said sadly, "He can only drink blood."
"OMFG!" cried Alice, bursting through the door. "WAS THERE JUST AN EPIC DANCE BATTLE OUT HERE?!"
"Yeah," said Edward sadly. "We missed it."
Alice fell to her knees. "DAMMIT BELLA!" she screamed up to the heavens.
"WTF?!" sobbed Bella. "WHAT DID I DO?!"
"Of course not." said Alice smoothly.
"What-" said Rosalie, coming out of the house.
"We missed it." Alice told her.
"What?" asked Rosalie. "I was going to ask if we would rather have irritable grizzly or deer for dinner."
"Calm, people," said Jasper, walking out of the house in a state of passiveness. "Let us be calm, we have milk."
Everyone nodded as they agreed.
"Let us head inside and drink this elixir of calcium." said Jasper. So everyone made there way into the house. With that, Jasper turned to the audience and yelled, "DRINK MILK GROW TALL."
a/n: So, it's been a LITTLE longer than I anticipated. XD but it's up now, and hopefully you will all shower me with forgiveness :D yay! so umm, I have nothin to say. yeah. REVIEW! No preview this week, cuz I'm not sure what I want to do next, I'm thinkin something 3OH!3.
REVIEW AWARD OF THE WEEK: goes to CourtneyHale, who made me feel lovely by givin me an imaginary medal AND a yo mamma sized Aro :D I feel loved.