The Kanker Sister Chronicles

Chapter 1: The Kanker Sisters Come to Peach Creek

Setting: between "The Ed-Touchables" and "Nagged to Ed"

Disclaimer: I don't own Ed, Edd and Eddy. All copyrights belong to Cartoon Network, A.K.A. Cartoon, and Danny Antonnuci. No copyright infringement is intended.

It was a peaceful evening in the cul-de-sac. The sunset was beautiful, and the Eds were chasing their jawbreakers, which Sarah had knocked out of their clutches, down the street.

"Come on, guys, we can catch them!" Eddy said. The Eds kept running after the spheres of candy until the jawbreakers fell down an open man hole. Eddy was about to go down until Double D stopped him.

"Eddy, forget it. It's probably contaminated with the gunk down there" Double D said. "Even Ed wouldn't go down there."

Ed shook his head. "No, I probably would" Ed said with a smile.

"Man, Double D, I can't believe how close we were to eating them!" Eddy whined. Ed patted him on the back. The trio headed up the hill back to the cul-de-sac. However, the boys were unaware that just after they started to go back up the hill, three girls climbed out of the man hole. May Kanker, Lee Kanker and Marie Kanker, looked at the boys walking off. They held in their hands the jawbreakers that they caught when the candy fell into the sewer, and overheard everything.

"Hey, did they call us gunk?" May asked her sisters. Lee shook her head at the dumb blonde.

"No, stupid, they were talking about the sewer's trash and poisons" Lee said. Marie noticed something about the boys.

"Hey, those guys are pretty cute" Marie said.

"Yeah, I think they're called the Eds" Lee replied.

"I think that tall hunk Ed is dreamy" May said as she pointed to Ed.

"I have my eyes on the dreamy, short guy. His name's Eddy" Lee said as she pointed to Eddy.

"I think that guy with the hat is really cute. They call him Double D" Marie said as she pointed to Double D. The Kankers walked into the woods, back to the trailer park.

"Those guys are dreamy. We should meet them!" Marie said. She and May were about to rush off towards the Eds until Lee stopped them.

"Hold it, girls! We can't just run after them. We barely know those guys, and they don't even know we moved here yet" Lee said.

"Nobody knows we moved here yet, Lee" Marie said.

"They are handsome, though" Lee admitted. The trio of girls went back down into the sewers. They kept walking until they finally reached the manhole to the trailer park. They went up the ladder, opened the manhole, climbed out and shut it.

"Well, we'll meet them someday soon. I'm sure of it" Lee said. The Kankers headed back into their trailer. The Kanker sisters soon began drawing pictures of themselves and their crushes. They hung the pictures on the wall.

A few days later, the Kankers headed out into the woods. They heard the voices of the Eds nearby.

"Hey, are those the Eds?" Marie asked while listening to the voices. They got a closer look in the bushes. They saw Double D and Eddy trying to pull Ed off a spider web.

"Why don't we scare them a bit?" May asked them. Lee nodded.

"Good idea, May" Lee replied.

"Ed, Edd and Eddy sitting in a tree" the Kankers said loudly. The Eds looked around to see where the noise came from. Ed finally got down from the web. The Kankers continued to scare them.

"Ed, Edd and Eddy sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G" the Kankers said again. The Eds ran off, while the Kankers followed hidden in the bushes. The Eds finally slipped and fell into a mud pile. The girls walked up in front of the Eds. The boys looked at them, screamed in fright, and passed out.

"What's with them?" May asked.

"They must have been shocked by our beauty" Lee said. The other girls nodded, and looked at the Eds.

"Well, what should we do?" Marie asked them.

"I say we bring them home, clean 'em up, and show them our love for them" Lee suggested. The other Kankers nodded.

"Okay girls, let's pick them up, and bring them to the trailer" Marie said. May stuck out her tongue.

"Ew, no way! They're covered in mud and dirt!" May said in disgust.

"Well, what should we do?" Marie asked her.

"I don't know. We could go to their houses and get spare clothes" May said. Lee shook her head.

"We don't know where their houses are. By the time we find their houses and clothes, they'd have already woken up and run off" Lee said.

"Then what do we do? Leave them here?" Marie asked. Lee shook her head.

"No, but I have an idea" Lee said. The other two girls listened intently.

"I'll go to our trailer, get our dads' robes, take their dirty shirts and pants, and dress them in the robes. Then we'll wash their shirts and pants, let them dry, and give them to 'em later" Lee explained.

"Okay, so while you do that, what do May and I do?" Marie asked her.

"You two stay here, and if they wake up, take them back to the trailer by whatever means necessary" Lee said. The two girls nodded, and Lee ran back to the trailer. She ran into her mother's room, took out their fathers' robes, and went back outside. She ran back into the woods, and found May and Marie.

"Alright, let's start undressing them" Lee said. The girls dragged the boys onto the dry ground. They took off the boys' shirts and pants. Then, they put the robes on the boys. They took the dirty clothes to the river, washed them, and hung them up on a clothing line to dry. They went back into the forest and took the boys back to their trailer.

"Well, what should we do?" May asked them.

"We wait until they wake up" Lee said.

"They're so cute" Marie said. The Kankers sighed.