A/N: Hey, guys. KingdomKey here! Now, you're probably wondering what the heck this is. Well, this is a story my friend Staredcraft and I have been working on for awhile. The story is a crossover between two very unlikely universes. The first is the Odd Trio, created by my friend Staredcraft. The Odd Trio is a multi-universe Super Hero story that stars characters like Jenny from My Life as a Teenage Robot, Danny Phantom, and Kimi Finster, who in Stared's story has her own identity as Ninjetta. You may need to read the story before understanding a few things. It isn't mandatory since the story isn't directly connected with the main story. It's more like a fun idea. The Odd Trio is crossing over with internet celebrity James Rolfe's Angry Video Game Nerd, an angry game reviewer who comically lambastes old video games. To learn more about him you may visit screwattack dot com. Now, we're already two chapters into the story, but due to not getting any comments from Staredcraft's profile, we decided to re-post the story at mine. I hope you look forward to our story, and if you're not fond of the Nerd's odd sense of humor, then you don't have to read further.
Disclaimer: We do not own the Angry Video Game Nerd character. He was solely created by James Rolfe and officially belongs to him and Screwattack. We did, however, receive permission from Mr. Rolfe to use his character. We also do not own the rights to the theme song, created by both Mr. Rolfe and Kyle Justin. Also, be advised that there will be explicit language due to the nature of the Angry Video Game Nerd series.
Video games: a vast source of entertainment that has become a part of the mass medium. Ever since the late seventies, video games have allowed people to explore many strange and unusual worlds in the comforts of their own homes. Some people would play these games for the mere sport of it, while contrarily, some people played them with a passion to win, and become a video game champion. Regardless of which way they were played, people young and old loved to play these video games. As time progressed and technology improved, video games became more elaborate. The graphics had more detail; there was more variety to the gameplay, and the length of time it took to beat a game increased significantly.
Each video game created was distributed on different video game consoles. During the late 70's to early 80's, most games were played and enjoyed on a console known as the Atari 2600. However, in 1983, due to an overwhelming amount of horrendous video games being produced, the market entered an era known as the, "North American Video Game Crash of 1983." The art of video games was on the verge of death, until 1985, when a video game industry known as "Nintendo" released their own home console in the United States; with it came the critically acclaimed Super Mario Brothers and R.O.B the Robot, which saved the entire industry from extinction. Thus, video games lived on for a future generation of gamers.
Today, most video games are played using 3D rendered graphics. Video games are manufactured and produced for four different consoles; the Nintendo Wii, the XBOX360, the home computer and the Playstation 3. While a preponderant amount of people love playing these games in three dimensions, some of them love the 2D games of yesteryear. They solemnly believe that these games held sentimental value to them, and they prefer playing these games over the 3D ones. These individuals are known as Retro Gamers.
Moreover, while a myriad of video games are fun and enjoyable, there are an overwhelming amount of games that are horrible. These games are so bad that once you play the first few minutes of them, you would turn off the game and wish to never play it again. Most people who play these distasteful games would just put it away in his or her box, lock them in a cabinet door, and never let them see the light of day again.
However, there is one person out there who has made it his life's goal to play these terrible games all the way through, brutal critiquing them with a foul mouth more vile than a snake's deadly fangs, ready to impale them on an innocent bystander. Infamously known by many as the most malevolent gamer on the face of the earth, he reviews these god awful games, and destroys them by any means necessary; he would spit on them, flush them down a toilet, light them on fire, or he would release his feces all over them. He is known as the Angry Video Game Nerd.
The Nerd was a twenty eight year old male who lived in an apartment in Philadelphia. For most of his adulthood, he had secluded himself from the rest of the world, playing horrible video games and reviewing them to zero or no end. If you were to enter his room, you would become mesmerized by the number of games he owned. In the left corner of his room you could notice a giant entertainment system stocked up with over twenty different video game consoles. You could notice the Sega Genesis, Nintendo to Wii, Atari 2600 and 5200; the Comodore 64, Magnavox Odyssey, the Playstations, the XBOXs, and so many other systems. It was breathtaking to see that this person owned all of these consoles, past and new. All of them were stacked neatly on each shelf, so there would not be a cause for a mess.
Next to the entrance of the Nerd's door were various video game posters on the wall. Most of the pictures featured characters from various gamming franchises such as: Super Mario Brothers, Megaman, the Legend of Zelda, Sonic the Hedgehog etc. To the right was a wooden shelf that had an abundant amount of video games, all perfectly stacked based on what system it was for. In the center of the room, sitting in his chair and playing a video game at the moment was the Nerd himself.
The Nerd was depicted as a stereotypical nerd. He had on a pair of sideways oval shaped glasses, and he wore a white buttoned down shirt with a pocket pouch on the right side of his chest. In the pouch were a few writing utensils that he kept on him, albeit it was ambiguous if he actually used them or not..
He was currently playing a game on his Sega Genesis. The game he was playing was called, "Ghostbusters," based on the 1984 comedy film with the same name; coincidentally, Ghostbusters was one of his favorite movies. Unlike most of the bad games he has played, he actually liked this game. He decided that he needed a break from bashing the living hell out of crappy games, so he decided to play a good game instead. Unfortunately, in spite of the game being good, he still had problems with it. As he played the game, he could only watch in bewilderment as his character (which was Egon Spengler from the movie) got killed by a coffee mug, which surprisingly, resulted in him turning into a mummy. His bottom lip stiffened up as a look of frustration manifested on his face.
"Jesus Fucking Christ all mighty on a pogo stick!" he cried out with his loud New Jersey accent. "Why the hell are these fucking coffee cups so impossible to destroy? I mean, they're coffee mugs for Christ sakes! They shouldn't be this difficult to dispose of! Which intelligent shithead thought this would be a good idea to make these things overpowering, let alone make the enemies coffee mugs at all? And why in the name of the holy fuck does my guy turn into a mummy? I don't remember the Ghostbusters getting their asses handed to them and turning into mummies in the movie. Who thought of this!? It must've been some game developer who was jerking off in the bathroom when he noticed a roll of toilet paper, and thought to himself, 'Hm, wouldn't it be cool if we turned a Ghostbuster into a mummy for shits and giggles?' That doesn't even make sense! I guess I'd turn into a mummy too if a cup was trying to fuck me in the ass. Also, I still don't understand why the Ghostbusters have to buy their own equipment. I ask you, who here knows how to make an unlicensed nuclear accelerator? 'Cause I sure don't. Didn't these guys see the movie!? What's the point...of making a game...based off a movie...WHEN YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE FUCKING MOVIE TO BEGIN WITH!?"
Catching his breath for the moment, the Nerd leaned over the right side of his chair and grabbed a bottle of beer that was on the floor. On the front of the beer bottle was a label that said, "Rolling Rock." The Nerd drank beer whenever he needed to sooth the pain from playing an awful video game. He first started to drink beer after playing a game called, "Dr Jekyll and Mr. Hyde," because that game was so bad that it officially scarred him for life. Sometimes, he would have nightmares about playing that game, over and over again in a white void of nothingness. To this day, just thought of that game sent shills right down his spine...and down his ass too.
The Nerd removed the cap and brought the bottle up to his mouth. He tasted the liquid as it slowly slid down his throat and into his stomach. He then placed the bottle back onto the ground conscientiously, so that it would not fall over onto the rug. He took a second to catch his breath before he spoke up again.
"In all honesty, the game is actually good," the Nerd said calmly. "It's a hell of a lot better than the other shitty video game adaptations of the movie. Once in awhile I do like to play some good games. I actually plan to play Super Smash Brothers Brawl tonight, though I won't be playing online because those dumb fucks at Nintendo of America still haven't addressed the issue with the one second lag that happens when you press a button. Yeah, there is a once second lag. I could shit faster than that! How in the ass did they mess this up!? Especially since it's a fucking Smash Brothers game! The one second lag is such a bitch to get used to. I'd rather eat my glasses and shit them out into a bucket full of scorpions. I'd rather puke out twenty day old lizard piss and roll around in it on the New Jersey Turnpike!"
He took another moment to calm down by drinking some more of his Rolling Rock. As he placed it down again, he let out a small smile. Tonight, he was going to actually play a good game for once. He needed a break from venting his anger out on crappy games.
"Well, at least tonight I can enjoy myself," the Nerd said optimistically. "A man needs a break from shitty games once in awhile, and nothing, and I repeat, nothing bad is going to ruin my night."
The Nerd was about regret those words. Suddenly, he noticed a flash of light out of the corner of his eye. He veered his head leftward to see his window. The Nerd noticed that a bright yellow light was flashing outside of his window. The Nerd arose from his seat and scurried over to his window to see what was going on. When he arrived at the window, he pushed the shutters up and stuck his head out.. The Nerd noticed that a beam of light was shooting up into the sky. The Nerd followed the beacon of light upward until he could see the end of it. What the Nerd saw next caused him to gasp in horror. At the top of the beacon was what appeared to be a silhouette of a piece of crap. (Similar to the Batman symbol) The Nerd then brought his head back in the window, shocked and upset by what he just saw.
He instantly knew what it meant, and it was going to ruin his plans for tonight.
Rage...that was the only thing going through his mind right now; a rage so powerful that it was about to go off like a bomb. His body was trembling in anger. His once calm face was now replaced by his famous overly exaggerated enraged glare. He looked up towards the ceiling while he shook his head, mouthing, "No, no, no."
Finally, his anger exploded as he raised his left arm into the air and gave the middle finger. He then shouted out a simple but loud word that echoed throughout the entire town.
"FUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKK!!" he screamed.
Hence, this is how it all begins...the story of Captain Crappy Games, or as most know him as, the Angry Video Game Nerd.