Disclaimer: Once again, 'Naruto' is not the product of my imagination; it is simply the medium I use to express my subconscious. (Artsy enough for everyone! Hey, you have to give me one for trying? hehe!) Anyways, Masashi Kishimoto is the creative genius behind the series/manga.
Warning: This fic is rated M for sexual content (yaoi lemon) and language. And D for depression. So, sorry in advance, for the mood dropper.
A/N: This little piece of angst was inspired by the song by Daft Punk, of which it takes its name. Sort of a sad, melancholic little song that just spoke volumes to me the other night.
Criticism: Of course! Whatever comes to you, I want to hear it, if you want to share it (whatever it is).
Something About Us.
Sasuke stood there, chest heaving in and out, just staring at his sparring partner.
Naruto, also panting heavily, stood several feet away.
"You finished." Sasuke said slowly.
Naruto's deep blue eyes still looked livid.
"Fuck you, Sasuke, don't think you've beaten me!"
Sasuke just smirked at that. How many times had Naruto said those exact same lines over the years? He thought it would be ironic, and slightly comical, to respond with his usual taunts about Naruto being last place. But this time, he oddly didn't feel like repeating the tradition. They had danced this dance for years now, and Sasuke was tired. For once in his life he allowed Naruto to win.
Yet, in the end, Sasuke knew that neither of them would really come out winners in this; life wasn't a game that had an ending, at least, not the way a spar had one.
Naruto still continued to pant; slowly, trails of sweat could be seen rolling down the heated, tanned skin of his neck and under his loose-fitting black and orange shirt. Sasuke wet his lips before he even realized what he was doing. But then again, he had long stopped pretending that he didn't desire Naruto. There was no point in denying anything now. Still, Sasuke was amazed that Naruto kept trying to do so. Was Naruto really this blind?
"Why can't you just admit it?" He called out to his still panting rival.
Naruto shook his head, but this time, he let out a somewhat lengthy breath. Perhaps he too was wearing thin.
"Sasuke, you're my friend; haven't I done enough for you in the past? Why do you want to rob me of the one hope I might have of having a family?"
Suddenly, Naruto was angry, "Dammit, Sasuke, you want a family as much as I do, why the hell do you keep going on and on about us?"
Sasuke turned away from the accusing glare; in a way, it was hurtful. Yet another betrayal to add to his long list. Perhaps he was the one who should be upset, not Naruto? It was Naruto's fault after all; he was the one who had led him on. And now he stood there denying any sort of connection that Sasuke had thought they had. Did Naruto act this way to just about everyone then? Was that the way his ever dependable friendship worked: to latch on to someone, have that person tell him all of his hopes, all of his fears, act as if that person mattered most to him—hell, devote years and years into that person's redemption—only to move on to the next thing just as easily?
"Fuck, Naruto." Sasuke whispered, his eyes no longer meeting his friend's, "Dammit, you can't tell me you feel absolutely nothing?"
Sasuke hated this; here he was no longer in control. Here he could no longer hide behind that impassive mask and pretend that he didn't care that his world was collapsing before his eyes. Yes, curse Naruto, if this was what he did to people.
"Ahhhh," Naruto let out a low growl that escalated with his frustration; suddenly livid, he launched at Sasuke.
Sasuke fell into a crouch, before he somersaulted out of the reach of Naruto's charging fist.
"I told you my reasons, dammit; why the fuck do you keep pushing this!" Naruto erupted, swiping a kick at Sasuke's face.
Sasuke crawled backwards on his hands; all the while staying just a hair away from Naruto's enraged attack. Naruto's heal barely brushing across Sasuke's cheek.
Yup, they were back to fighting. But then again, it was far more relieving to fight than to just stare at each other and try to talk out their argument. Now, Sasuke felt the shift of power changing, as if he was gaining more control over the situation. Here, Naruto would listen to him, here he had Naruto's full attention; here, he even had some power over the outcome.
"Why, because of Sakura?" Sasuke questioned, though he already knew this answer.
Naruto growled all the more, as if Sasuke's very words were reminders of Naruto's failure with the girl. But, Sasuke didn't flinch; it wasn't his fault Naruto couldn't win Sakura over.
"Damn you, Sasuke," Naruto growled again, "Sakura loves you; stop fucking ignoring her feelings, bastard!"
Sasuke had had it; springing to his feet, he sent a fist flying at Naruto's midsection. Naruto lunging back to get out of the way.
"Damn you Sasuke, do you fucking realize how lucky you are? She wants you!"
"I don't return it." Sasuke said simply, his voice calm and controlled, yet his fists danced with fury at Naruto's exposed back. Naruto spun around and blocked Sasuke's attack.
Suddenly they locked fists.
"Well, unlike you, I'm NOT throwing it away with Hinata!"
Sasuke bared his teeth. "So, she means that much to you, huh?" his head ringing with anger at just how quickly Naruto had replaced him. "So much, in so little a time? Damn you Naruto."
They sprung apart.
Suddenly, Sasuke lunged at Naruto, his fist racing towards his opponent's face.
Naruto ducked under Sasuke's flying fist. "Yes, bastard, she does. She told me she has loved me for as long as she can remember; we want to start a family together, you remember what that is, right bastard?!"
"Hn," Sasuke snorted, "You're pathetic."
"Damn you, Sasuke, haven't you taken enough of my life up as it is already!"
Sasuke flinched; he couldn't help it. So that's what he did, take up Naruto's much needed time? He wished he could stop fighting; he wished he could walk away, angry and wallowing in his own self misery at Naruto's words, but he couldn't. He knew that this was his last chance to have the one person that meant more to him than he thought a person could mean. So, he stayed in the fight, he stayed to listen to those words that were slowly tearing up his insides.
All this time, he thought Naruto had chased him and begged him to come back to the Village because Naruto cared, because Naruto was the brother he should have had, the one piece of the puzzle that if he could just allow it to fit into its proper place, than Sasuke could stop searching. Stop searching for revenge, stop searching for a means to justify his existence.
So he had allowed that piece to fit, he had allowed Naruto to enter into a place in his heart where no one had trodden since Itachi, and now after it all—after Sasuke had given up his revenge and stopped trying to find his purpose—the purpose he thought he found was suddenly leaving him, and just like that?
Naruto created five Kage Bunshin. Suddenly, five copies of his should-be lover were racing towards him, each pulling out a kunai. For a moment, Sasuke thought he would just let one of those daggers go straight through his heart. But he couldn't, because even in death, he couldn't live without Naruto. Yes, he was that desperate.
Sasuke dodged the clone's weapon coming for his heart, and rolled out of the way, coming up behind the copied boy that had now become his target. With a kunai of his own he slashed through the clone. He didn't have to worry, he knew it wasn't Naruto.
"So that's it then, 'ey Naruto?" he said quickly, two more Kage Bunshin were at him, "Everything we went through, everything that happened, means nothing now?"
Naruto laughed bitterly. "Don't fucking pretend that meant anything to you, Sasuke-teme! We both know you were just biding your time, just waiting for some fucking excuse to run off again so you could kill him."
Sasuke inwardly jerked at Naruto's words. So, now what happened was supposed to mean nothing to him? Sasuke didn't think so, and he would be dammed if he let Naruto believe that anything that happened that night was merely him trying to distract his friend so he could run off. Why now was Naruto being so fucking dense?
It was after that, while lying with his arm wrapped loosely around his friend's waist, that Sasuke had decided to just stop fighting. He had been watching Naruto as he slept, and suddenly it had made sense to him then. The reason, why at the Valley of the End, he couldn't go and kill Naruto has he had planned. The reason tore him up inside to admit, but somehow he did: He loved Naruto.
Yes, Naruto had become more than just his best friend, he had become his life line, a buoy to hang on to so the last reminds of his sanity would not be lost. Naruto pursuing him, Naruto caring about him, Naruto fighting for him had in all honesty saved his life. If only Itachi's power had not been so strong, Itachi's cold fingers not dug so deeply into Sasuke's heart, perhaps he could have realized it sooner. Perhaps then he wouldn't have had to end up hurting Naruto again and again as his blonde friend tried and failed, repeatedly, to save him.
But now Sasuke did know, and now Sasuke didn't want to make the same mistake again. Somehow, some way, he had to make Naruto realize it.
"Naruto, I can't give you a family," he said. Flipping backwards to get out of the reach of two more of Naruto's clones. "Hell, I can't tell you I've worshiped you for years, like she can."
"Then why, Sasuke?" Naruto's tone was almost pleading, "Why, can't you let her give me these things?"
Sasuke shook his head furiously. No, he couldn't; he'd loose the one thing that his life was depending upon. Without Naruto he would go back to that cold, despairing, lurker state where he used to live. No, Sakura in all of her warmth just didn't have the strength to save him, only Naruto did. Only Naruto could break Itachi's power over Sasuke. Dammit, didn't Naruto know this?!
"Fuck you Sasuke," Naruto snapped at Sasuke's lack of words, at the words Sasuke failed to tell him; the words which, if his eyes could be trusted, would have given him the first signs of relief. "I-I fucking want this, don't you get it?"
Naruto plummeted into Sasuke, taking him down to the floor. His fist coming down to break the skin of Sasuke's cheek. In his fury, his legs had pinned Sasuke's arms down to the floor. Sasuke had no way to block Naruto now; again and again Naruto's fist came crashing down into his face.
"Why goddammit?" Naruto wailed in fury, "For one time in my life, I have a chance at the family I have never EVER had; why, fucking tell me why, you won't be happy for me?!"
Sasuke was coughing out the blood his broken lip was causing to spill into his mouth.
"God damn you Sasuke," Naruto wailed again, another fist crashing into Sasuke's lip, "Fucking answer me!"
"I CAN'T!" Sasuke finally roared. Naruto's fists slid to a halt, trembling.
"I can't sit back and just wish you the best!"
Tears of frustration and pain were rolling down Naruto's cheeks.
"Why the hell not?" he whispered, "It's what I've always, ALWAYS, wished for you Sasuke, ever since I met you and I saw how unhappy and bitter you were. I wished that kind of happiness on you, that's why I couldn't let you destroy yourself with revenge. I wanted you, WANTED you, to finally have a place to call home, a family to call home. Kami, why the hell can't you want the same for me?!"
Tears were falling uncontrollably down Naruto's cheeks now, "Why?" He muttered.
"Because," Sasuke whispered, "Because I want you to be that family, Naruto."
Naruto stared down at him, causing the tears to drip from of his chin and land on Sasuke's bloodied lips. He was just staring at Sasuke, his mouth slightly opened; his eyes, large and watery, were wavering. Perhaps he didn't know what to say, perhaps that was it. For he stayed quiet.
Slowly, he rolled off of Sasuke.
"You don't know what you're asking." He said finally after what seemed like days of silence. "If we get together, then it will be only us—it will stop with us. We won't have kids to play together, wives to cook us those warm meals that even the people in the street can smell. No, it will just be us: cold rooms; no children laughing, no wife playfully scolding, no family."
Sasuke slowly sat up at Naruto's soft, almost despairing words. Naruto's back was to him. Tentatively, Sasuke's hand went to rest on Naruto's shoulder.
Naruto looked over at him. His vivid, blue eyes looked desperate.
"Sasuke," he breathed, slowly trailing a hand to wipe the blood from his friend's broken lip; he shook his head, "Don't you understand? You'll never be able to pass on your line. When you die, it dies with you."
Naruto shook his head more furiously, "Dammit, Sasuke, wasn't that your dream to repopulate your clan? Why now, when it's right in front of you, are you pushing it away? Why huh?" Anger seeping out of his last words as he grabbed Sasuke's shoulders and gave them a good shake.
"Because Naruto, somewhere along the lines, I found a new dream," Sasuke looked directly into Naruto's deep eyes. "And I want that dream far more than the first two."
It was then that a lone trail of wetness fell from his eye and traced the curve of his cheek. Sasuke faltered: did he, just now, actually cry? When had his eye even started watering? Sasuke hadn't cried for so long, he had sort of forgotten how it felt like to do so.
Curiously, he examined the wet moisture that fell onto his arm. He really had cried again?! Suddenly, memories, god-sent memories, flooded his mind. He saw his mother laughing as his older brother swung him around in his arms. A single tear of joy trailing down her cheek. Then, he felt her hands wiping away his own tears as she helped him stand after a rather ugly fall. Suddenly, Itachi was hugging him to warn off the monsters under his bed at night and he felt himself press his tear-stained face into the fabric of his brother's shirt. In an instant, more memories flashed through his mind until they came together in one incoherent blur. Tears, he remembered his tears; all of those beautiful, sorrowful, bittersweet and wonderful tears that he had spilt as a child before his life had been ripped away from him so quickly.
At that moment, he wanted it back: he wanted his life back. He wanted to live again! It was his life, and already so much of it had passed right through his fingers. With Naruto, he knew he had a chance to save it, to regain the life that he used to have. An actual life that consisted of all emotions, not just the bitterness, anger and indifference where he lived in now. But, he couldn't get back to that life, not without Naruto.
"I-I need you." His voice seemed to force itself out from his lips; for once he was begging Naruto. For once, it was he who didn't want to go home without Naruto. Because Sasuke knew that there was no home to go to, not without his friend.
Naruto's eyes were wide when Sasuke looked back up into them. Quickly, Naruto shook his head.
"But, b-," Naruto looked like he was being split down the middle, as if he was torn between two worlds, "But, I need this." He said slowly.
"Sasuke," he threw his arms around Sasuke's shoulders so fast that Sasuke only had time to gape.
"Sasuke, dammit," Naruto went on in a torrent of hushed and pain-filled words, "Goddammit, Sasuke, I do love you."
Sasuke's eyes went wide. Did he really hear what he thought he heard? Was it possible? Did Naruto actually love him? Oh Kami, please, he whispered, I can't live without him. I need him.
"Dammit, Sasuke I love you more than I think it's possible to love someone." Naruto sobbed, before he tensed up and ripped himself away. When his hands gripped Sasuke's shoulders, it was with a fervor that Sasuke hadn't seen Naruto express before.
"But, I-I have to do this, for me." He got the words out as firmly as he could, yet his voice seemed almost breathless. "I need this, Sasuke."
Sasuke found himself nodding, before he was shaking his head in protest again.
"There's-there is nothing I can give you, nothing that could make you stay?" Despite his questioning tone, it wasn't really a question and they both knew it.
Naruto shut his eyes tightly, more of those life-giving tears spilling down his cheeks. Slowly, he shook his head.
Sasuke nodded, a soft smile forming on his lips. He knew that Naruto had made up his mind on this—like he had when he had decided to bring Sasuke back home—and Sasuke knew that once Naruto made his mind up, there was no changing it.
Naruto still hadn't opened his eyes.
"It's all wrong." Sasuke half whispered.
"Us." Sasuke said simply, "Everything: the timing, the place; hell, everything, even who we are."
Naruto was deadly still, his eyes held tightly shut. More tears were leaking down his cheeks.
"But you can't deny that there's just something about us." Somehow Sasuke's hand found Naruto's nearly buried in the grass, and covered it.
"Something that-," Sasuke's eyes found the ground, the words felt so thick against his dry throat that they were nearly impossible to get out. "Something that makes it not matter, because it's us."
Sasuke closed his eyes, pressing his lips together tightly, desperately trying to regain his composure.
"I wish, I wish I could give you what could make you happy." Sasuke's tone back to being emotionless. "I wish I could be her."
Suddenly, Naruto pulled his hand out from under Sasuke's, and turned his back to him. Sasuke could hear him beginning to pluck at the long blades of grass.
"But, I'm not." He continued. Naruto's raspy breaths acting as a background.
"I'm not her; hell, I'm probably not even right for you," Slowly, Sasuke scooted closer to Naruto. "But-but, I need you, Naruto."
And with that Sasuke slowly wrapped his arms around his friend from behind. "More than anyone else, I need you in my life."
Naruto let out a raspy breath. Before he clung ferociously to Sasuke's arms around him.
"Naruto," Sasuke whispered, rubbing his face into Naruto's messy hair, his face brushing past dirt and small twigs still caught in the blonde spikes from their roll on the floor. "Naruto please."
"Sasuke," Naruto's tone was almost reverent, tender. Not like the typical harshness that he used in their sparring.
Slowly, he pulled away from Sasuke's arms and spun around to face his friend. Sasuke looked into Naruto's eyes; if possible more tears were rolling down Naruto's scarred cheeks. Drawing a hand up, Sasuke caught a tear from Naruto's cheek, and sucked his finger into his mouth, tasting the salty essence of his best friend.
Naruto's lips were trembling, his eyes burning into Sasuke's; a deep seeded longing existed behind those turbulent, bright blue orbs, which if anything seemed all the brighter and bluer the more he cried.
Naruto's hand went down to rest on Sasuke's leg drawn up into a sitting position. Slowly, Naruto leaned forward. Crossing the small distance, he touched his slightly trembling lips against Sasuke's.
Both their eyes were opened, both looking at each other: in a single instant, longing, fear and need seemed to flash between them.
"Sasuke," Naruto whispered into the kiss, and slowly he shut his eyes.
Sasuke shut his eyes at the sound of his name on Naruto's lips. He was beginning to taste the iron flavor of his own blood as Naruto's mouth stirred up the aftereffects of his bloodied lip from earlier.
Then, Naruto's tongue—moist and warm—slowly touched against Sasuke's lips. Gently, he began to lick away the dried up blood.
Sasuke savored the feel of Naruto's tongue. The gentleness of Naruto's small gesture, it was more care than Sasuke had received in all of his years as a vengeful, stone-cold assassin. It was like heaven had taken pity upon him and slowly opened up a path for him to follow; a path that would lead him to a safe harbor, if only for a small period of time.
Slowly, he began to kiss Naruto back.
Then, breathing through his nose, he began to unleash into that kiss, all of the pain and hurt that lived beneath his skin. Forcefully, and yet with a tenderness that he didn't think he would ever be able to show, he deepened their kiss. If all he got was this moment up on this hill before Naruto disappeared from him forever, then Sasuke would live this moment as if it was a hundred moments all in one. For once in his life he was clear on something that didn't consist of Itachi, or murder, or revenge.
No, this time it was Naruto. All Naruto. He loved him, heavens damn him, he loved him and for this one moment Naruto was all his.
Sasuke shifted their positions; slowly, and yet forcefully, taking Naruto to the ground. Naruto gripped the back of Sasuke's head with a force that seemed to want to bring Sasuke into his body, instead of hold him still. Together they kissed each other, hard, fast, furious. It was painful, his broken lip screaming in protest. But, it was also sweat and pleasurable in a way that Sasuke knew was far worth any pain he was feeling at this moment.
Naruto was discovering him, and rediscovering him all at once. His tongue kept exploring Sasuke's mouth. Sasuke parted his lips more to allow Naruto to deepen the kiss, more of Naruto's eager tongue filling his mouth. Suddenly, Sasuke traveled the length of Naruto's tongue and forced his own into Naruto's mouth.
Naruto panted-gasped; Sasuke smirked into the kiss. This was how it should be: him and Naruto. This was what was meant to happen between them. It was inevitable, as the day a baby first draws his breath until the day the old man takes his last. Yes, this was what he and Naruto were supposed to make together.
Then, Naruto's hands found the edges of Sasuke's sweat-stained shirt. Naruto yanked the fabric up until it pressed uncomfortably against Sasuke's neck. Sasuke grabbed the shirt and pulled it the remaining way over his head.
Now he lay, partially naked, on top of Naruto.
Naruto's eyes began to examine him, his orbs softening as he took in the sight of his friend's naked, pale skin. Slowly, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Sasuke's collar bone. Sasuke drew in a sharp breath. Naruto's hand had come up to grip the back of Sasuke's neck and pull him closer.
"Nar-uto," Sasuke managed to get out as Naruto continued to suck on his skin, his mouth moving over his jugular. "G-ds Na-aruto."
In one quick movement, Naruto had forced Sasuke beneath him. Sasuke's head clucking lightly against the grassy floor. Naruto was kissing him hard, but this time, his hands were roaming down Sasuke's body, roaming and racing over Sasuke's firm muscles, following the fine body hairs that led downward, to Sasuke's hidden parts. Naruto parted Sasuke's jeans, his eager hand forcibly jolting the zipper downward.
Sasuke grabbed any part of Naruto that he could and kissed hungrily. He wanted to consume his friend, wanted to take some of that life-force of Naruto's that was also keeping him alive. He needed Naruto!
Naruto's hand was clutching Sasuke's shaft from outside his boxers. Before he sat back and roughly unzipped his own pants. Pulling them down to get them mostly out the way, he freed his aching member from his tight boxer-briefs.
Sasuke pulled his own pants down more, bringing his boxers down with it. Then he grabbed his own member and brought it out against Naruto's.
At once, Naruto grabbed the both of them up in one hand. Before he began to rub, up and down, the both of their lengths, slow at first and then getting all the more furious. Sasuke let out groan, his head rolling back against the grass at the sensations Naruto was evoking.
Naruto was breathing heavily; his eyes looking down at Sasuke, his face scrunching up with a desperation that seemed to radiate out of his very skin. Leaning down—Sasuke pushing himself up to meet his lover half way—Naruto caught Sasuke's mouth in a torrent of a kiss.
Then Sasuke gripped the back of Naruto's head, and in a quick tossing movement of his own, had reclaimed his position on top of his lover.
Naruto's hand still held them together. His other hand wrapped around Sasuke's neck, his fingers digging into the skin of Sasuke's shoulder.
Sasuke began to stroke Naruto's face, all the while planting kisses everywhere he could find: all over Naruto's scarred cheek; all along the heart-shaped line of his jaw; all across Naruto's brows and down over his tear stained eyes. Sasuke licked over his eyelids, again tasting the salty tears of his friend. He longed to take in Naruto's tears, to store them up, so that he too could cry; that he too could come back to life.
Naruto was still working on their members. Sasuke, already lightheaded, felt the need to thrust even harder into Naruto's palm. Suddenly, he pulled at Naruto's pants. Naruto's hand slipping off of his shoulder, and going down to help Sasuke. Together, they freed Naruto completely from his black sweat pants along with his boxer-briefs.
Now, Sasuke yanked at Naruto's shirt. Cerulean eyes caught his for a fraction of a second, before Sasuke pulled the material over Naruto's head and threw the shirt off to the side. Naruto's hand went to pull at Sasuke's pants, still clinging halfway down his legs. Sasuke wiggled out of his remaining clothes.
He knew what Naruto wanted, for it was the same as him. Both wanted to feel the other's nakedness pressed against his own. Their two naked and sweaty bodies pressing together, curving into each other, before they finally gave in and melded together to become one. No, it was not in the way that would bring life into the world. But, it was the way that would allow life to enter Sasuke's world again.
Spitting into his palm, and smearing the saliva over his fingertips, Sasuke quickly brought his hand down to Naruto's entrance and rapidly pressed his fingers in and around the hole, trying to moisten his lover the best he could.
Naruto was panting heavily. "Just do it." He whispered, Sasuke nodding at his words, his own breathing seeming to crash—loud and harsh—against his ears.
He took his member out of the comfort of Naruto's hand, and aligned it to his lover's entrance.
"Na-aruto," he moaned out, as he pushed the entirety of his length into the blond in one, deep thrust. Naruto let out a half groan, half moan. His eyes were clouding up with lust faster by the moment. The pain was slowly lessening as his body was getting used to the feel of Sasuke inside of him.
"S'suke," he muttered, and pulled his lover against him. He clung to Sasuke's head, before he pressed his face into the crock of Sasuke's neck. Panting, Naruto licked the sweat coating the crevice of Sasuke's skin, only to replace it with his own saliva as he kissed, open mouthed and messy, all over against the other boy's neck.
Sasuke grabbed Naruto up tightly, and held on to him with everything he had. He knew he had to start moving, he had to start pleasuring his lover with fast paced thrusts, but Sasuke didn't want to speed up their love making. He wanted it to last as long as the earth stood beneath them.
But, his body and Naruto's would not let him. Naruto was thrusting against him, all the while moaning into the skin of his neck.
"Oh god, S'suke f-uck me."
Sasuke continued to pant; then, he gave into the pleasure of his body. He began to take his lover in slow strides: first shallow, then deep enough until he heard Naruto moan out in pleasure-pain against the invasive force bruising his insides.
Naruto had been pressed into the ground. Sasuke just stared into his misty, blue eyes. With each thrust he met them; each slow dive into his lover, he held those eyes, refusing to let them go. It was only when the mind-consuming pleasures of their lovemaking began to cloud his own dark pools, that he lost eye contact with his lover.
There on that hill, Sasuke told Naruto he loved him in the only words that the other boy didn't need spoken to him, the one language that only the two of them shared. Again and again he told him. He told him he needed him, he wanted him. And that he would love him regardless of what the future held for the two of them.
Naruto met his thrusts, silently returning Sasuke's affection. Before his own feelings began to escape his lips in low groans of pleasure.
Yes, Sasuke knew that there was probably no place in this messed up world for the two of them; that was just the fucked up universe they lived in. But still, there was still something about them—a connection they shared—that Sasuke knew they just wouldn't find with anyone else.
Their lovemaking continued to escalate, until Sasuke couldn't take it anymore. With a moan, he emptied his seed into his lover, Naruto's own essence spilling all over his abdomen. Sasuke just rubbed against his lover, trying to absorb all of Naruto's semen into his body via the tiny pores of his skin.
Naruto let out a slow, deep and very satisfied, breath. For a moment, none talked, just breathed against each other and let the sound of their rapid, near panting, breaths fill the silence.
Slowly Sasuke pulled out of his lover, before he laid his head against Naruto's chest; his partially opened mouth sending warm breaths against Naruto's heated and sweaty skin.
Gingerly, Naruto laid an arm around Sasuke.
"How's your lip?" He asked after they had lain there long enough to hear the beginning of crickets playing in the tall grasses around them. The sky already a grayish mauve, most of the colors having been drained away by the absence of the sun.
"Don't feel it anymore." Sasuke responded.
"Sorry," Naruto breathed.
"Don't worry about it."
"I love you."
Sasuke blinked and nuzzled into the soft, nearly invisible hairs of Naruto's chest. Closing his eyes, he breathed in Naruto's sent, before he let out a slow breath.
"But, you don't plan to stay, do you?" He knew that both of them knew it wasn't a question.
Slowly, Naruto shook his head. "I need to do this Sasuke." His voice still sounding a bit drained
"Don't hate me," Naruto whispered.
Sasuke shook his head rapidly. "That's impossible."
Suddenly, a strange wetness drew his attention down to Naruto's chest. Wetness? Tears?!
Was he crying again? He could feel it now, the almost soothing sensation of water moistening his dry eyes. Then the burning that clutched behind his temples, as if his body wasn't willing to let go of its water. Finally, the release of it all, as the tears slowly rolled out of his eyes and off against Naruto's skin.
Suddenly, Naruto was wiping the few tears away with shaky, calloused fingers.
"You know why I need this, Sasuke." Naruto's voice started out strong but broke into a whisper with the last word he uttered, "Please."
Sasuke froze; Naruto was begging him.
"Please, Sasuke, don't make me give this up, it's all I've wanted for so, so long."
Slowly, Sasuke nodded. He couldn't stand to hear Naruto sound so helpless; his ears just couldn't take it. Naruto had risked his life to save him; Naruto had brought him back from an early grave. He couldn't kill Naruto. No, he just couldn't; even if it meant that he would slowly die from the aftereffects. Yes, he knew that he would slowly go back to sealing away his emotions, his life, without Naruto. But, still he couldn't have Naruto if Naruto did not want him.
Yes, Naruto loved him. Yes, Naruto would continue to love him. But Naruto didn't want him. It was the ultimate rejection, but Sasuke loved Naruto too much to force him to go where he didn't want to go, even if it would save his own life.
Sasuke cursed himself then, his weakness, his innate desire to see Naruto happy. Back then, he would have made Naruto, would have guilted Naruto into staying by his side, but not now.
Not now, not after he got a taste at what it was like to live again.
Slowly, he drew a breath before he forced the words out, "If this is what you want, then I won't stand in your way."
Naruto seemed to release a breath. "Thank you Sasuke, thank you."
Sasuke oddly felt a smile form briefly on his lips at the gratitude he heard in Naruto's voice. Naruto hugged tightly to him. "You'll get to be the godfather I promise."
Sasuke just closed his eyes tightly and nodded. He decided to agree with Naruto, even though he knew that it was not going to happen.
Sasuke knew in his heart that when he let Naruto go he would soon leave the Village and continue his search for Itachi. If he was going to try and pick up those old dreams then he needed to do it right. And killing Itachi was the first of which had to happen. Then, perhaps if he made it back, he would try to carry on his line. Maybe it was the depression speaking, but he didn't really think he would be coming back. Perhaps, it wasn't depression, perhaps it was that he finally found acceptance in the fact that he could not hope to beat Itachi.
There was another part of him that welcomed death. He really didn't want to live without Naruto in his life, and just being his friend was not enough anymore. Still, he would miss Naruto more than anyone else in his life, that he knew. Hell, even in death, he would miss him.
Suddenly, Naruto pushed him away.
"You're gonna leave again, aren't you?" Again, they both knew that answer. Sasuke had to smirk at just how well Naruto knew him, and in turn, just how well he knew Naruto.
"Sasuke please don't."
"Naruto, he is still alive out there, and if I intend to start my clan back up, then it would be an insult to them, and to him, to not first finish him off."
"Please Naruto." Sasuke said, "You have your dream, please let me have mine."
"No," Naruto hugged furiously to Sasuke, "In that case, I won't leave you; in that case, just stay here with me!"
"We both know that is not what you want."
"I don't care; I don't want to loose you."
Sasuke smirked, "That's impossible." And with that, he sealed Naruto's lips with a kiss, leaving one last trace of the fact that he lived—yes, Uchiha Sasuke lived—he cried, he laughed, and he loved.
A/N: Again sorry for the downer!
And I know I said I'd release chap 7 of 'Things Pile On' next, but this one just sort of came to me. I'm not having writer's block or anything like that as far as TPO goes, more like just major procrastination! Also it seems like a million and one different story ideas are coming to my head, so it's difficult to focus on just one!
But, I will make myself sit down and finish chap 7, and hopefully will get that one out to you guys soon. Again sorry about that.
Oh and one last thought: This one shot may end up turning into a chapter story. I would like to know everyone's opinion on that. Since I could just leave the story as it is. If I do continue it, personally, I can see this story turning out very similar to Brokeback Mountain (never read the book though it was an excellent movie—if you ignore the somewhat draggy beginning, but Heath Ledger was very believable in that one. Too bad he passed away, he was a wonderful actor).
But, anyways let me know what you think about the story in general and the possibility of me continuing it.