Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight series. That right belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

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Lava Lamp

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"Geez, Edward." I stared, astonished at the sight before me. The two of us were in the basement of the Cullen home, sorting through various items. Apparently they haven't thrown out anything since the 1960s. Curious, I offered to help clear out some stuff with Edward, wanting to find out a little more about his past.

"It is my family's folly. They are pack-rats," he mused, engrossed in the memorabilia.

Lifting yet another box successfully, I began to sort through the items, and then stopped. "You are kidding me, right?"

"Hm?"

"8 Track, Edward?" The laughter escaped my lips as I tossed a few cartridges towards him.

He snorted. "Emmett had a fascination with the latest entertainment devices. He still has his walkman."

Images of his burly, older brother infiltrated my mind. Laughing even more, I continued to search through the boxes, sorting and sifting through the Cullen's items. "What about you, Edward?" I asked, teasing him. "Don't you have any embarrassing moments? Nothing you are ashamed of?"

"No, not in the least bit. I am quite fond of what I have collected over the years." He raised an eyebrow, grinning at me. "Unlike a certain someone's infatuation with TY Beanie Babies."

Glaring, I turned to one of the shelves, pulling out more stuff. "Will you ever let that go?"

"You know, I don't think I will. It is far too amusing."

Cursing audibly, I stepped onto the step stool to reach for the higher shelf, throwing some random objects towards Edward. He caught them with ease, a hint of a smirk on his lips, entertained by my tantrum. Stupid, coordinated vampire. I could only wish to be that graceful. My wish would become a reality if someone wasn't so adamant on my mortality.

"Don't be mad, Bella." The strained, choked chuckle in his voice did nothing to ease my annoyance.

"You just wait. One day I'll find out some strange fascination of yours and taunt you mercilessly!" I rolled my eyes as I saw him turning his back, a sad attempt at disguising his sheer and utter amusement. Going back to the task on hand, I tugged on a box upon the top shelf, holding my arms out to support its weight.

Simultaneously, three things happened. First, as I stepped down from the stool, my foot got caught in the hole at the seam of my jeans. Second, I pushed the box back against the shelf to catch my balance. Third, while pushing the box back into its place, something, and I don't know what, came tumbling down towards my head.

And then I saw darkness.

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Pain. Throbbing, sharp pain. Ugh. Why did I hurt so much? It felt as if someone were prodding my brain with a stick. Well, maybe hitting instead of prodding. None of that mattered though. It just hurt too damn much.

And then there were murmurs. Unable to comprehend what they were saying, I did all I could do. I groaned, whined, and cursed. The words came out incoherently, at least to me. Because the voices around me were unclear and low. It was the sound you hear of people talking while you are underwater. Fantastic.

Awakening from my dreamless stupor, the voices became clearer. "She'll be awake in five seconds."

"Bella," came the voice of an angel. My angel. Edward. I knew the gentle, musical tone well. Something cool and cold, I assumed his hand, gently probed the throbbing pain.

"Ouch." The hiss escaped my lips as he pressed on the sore spot. Blinking away the dizziness, the faces around me became noticeable. I stared and saw that Edward and Alice surrounded me. "Weren't we in the basement?"

Edward's grim facial expression began to falter. "We were until you managed to knock yourself out."

"What happened?"

"Well, I don't know, really. The only thing I saw was you getting hit in the head with something and you falling towards the floor. I managed to catch you before any further damage could be done."

"My hero," I muttered.

Alice's eyes were wide with concern and dismay. "I tried to call Edward. Really, I did, Bella! We were too far, and if we ran, it still would have been too late. I'm sorry!"

"Don't be, Alice. It isn't your fault that I am so accident prone." Or that God found my tendencies comical.

"I will go get you something for your head." Edward lifted my head gingerly from his lap and went to the kitchen.

"Thanks." I attempted to run my hand through my hair, but found it sticky and unruly. Was I bleeding? Pulling back my hand, I noticed a blue substance and glitter. "Alice? What exactly hit me?"

"Well, from what I saw, a lava lamp rolled out of the box, hit you in the head, and also broke against the shelf. You managed to go unscathed by the glass, but the contents of the lava lamp spilled on you. You only have minor contusions, no concussion."

Frowning, I kept my eyes on my hand. "Don't tell me Emmett collected lava lamps too."

"No, actually," she smiled wickedly. "It was Edward's."

I grinned. Let the merciless taunting begin.

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Authoress Note: Yes, this wasn't that great. I am tired. Bah. Oh, and before you ask where this idea came from, well, it is a true story. I got hit in the head with a lava lamp, suffered from minor bruising and contusions, and had the contents of the glittery lava lamp spill all over me. They called me Tinkerbell for weeks. Hah. Much love!