A/N: Hi, welcome to one of my first M oneshots. Erm. This is for all my readers who have jsut gotten sick and tired of waiting for Sasori and Deidara to do something in my fic. I really am sorry - I just like to develop characters too much. As an apology, this is a stand alone oneshot of the two of them finally getting down to some interesting actions.

Disclaimer: I never do these...but...yeah, I obviously dont own Naruto characters or my pen name here wouldnt be Akumi-san, it would be Masashi Kishimoto.

So anyways, do enjoy and please review and let me know how I did. I shall give you a cookie if you do :D


Hidan burst out laughing, his flushed face betraying his enormous intake of alcohol

Hidan burst out laughing, his flushed face betraying his enormous intake of alcohol. Kakuzu, who had kept his drinking to a bare minimum, smacked his partner in the back of the head. "Shut the fuck up, dumbass!"

Kisame and Itachi had taken it upon themselves on their last mission to retrieve as many sake bottles as they could hold before they destroyed their targeted warehouse. Before they had had the chance to sneak it in the Akatsuki doors, however, the immortal Jashinist had spotted them and made them share.

At this point, most of the members were inebriated beyond recognition. Zetsu had not participated, Tobi was passed out under the table, Leader-sama had yelled a lot before taking the suddenly overly seductive and flirtatious Konan away with him, Kisame was sulking in a corner, completely sober, Itachi was talking to a mirror, Kakuzu was trying to keep the loud, drunken Hidan in line, Deidara was huddled in a corner, slightly buzzed and trying to avoid all the intoxicated idiots, and Sasori was staring off into space.

Suddenly it seemed Kisame had had enough. "Okay, get the hell up!" he shouted, standing up suddenly and towering over them all menacingly.

"Kisame-chan, who is this amazing person? He keeps repeating me. Its like…its like…he can…read my thoughts, ya know," his partner said without looking from the handheld mirror.

"Godammit Itachi!" Kisame yelled and grabbed the Uchiha's wrist, pulling him up as well. "Everyone get out! This is ours! You've had enough!"

Hidan giggled and swayed a little as he rose. "Hehehe, your face looks like you fucking drowned twenty fucking years ago."

Before Kisame could react to that, Kakuzu clubbed the Jashin in the back of the head with a chair and proceeded to drag him upstairs with him without a word.

"Get your damn partner up to your room," the shark man snarled at Deidara. The blonde jumped at being addressed so viciously but stared for a moment at Sasori who hadn't budged. He was…drunk? How did that work? Wasn't he supposed to be a puppet? "NOW!"

Deidara flinched back and pulled the red head up the stairs with him. Never again did he want to be the target of Kisame's anger. That was really scary.

Sasori didn't really seem too terribly aware of his surroundings. By the time they entered the room, it seemed as though he had just realized the sculptor was even there.

Deidara, on the other hand was only slightly feeling the effects of the drink, having limited himself to two glasses. He hadn't even noticed that the other had downed almost as much as Hidan.

With a sigh and the intent to go straight to bed, he dropped Sasori off at his bed and sauntered over to his own, removing his shirt as he went.

Nothing prepared him for the body that crashed into him, sending him tumbling him into his own bed. With a startled gasp, he struggled to flip himself over before the figure was directly over him, pinning him down. That familiar, almost lemony scent pervaded his nose and it hit his slightly fuzzy mind. Sasori?! What the hell?

"Get off, danna," he squeaked, sounding far less manly than he wanted. "This isn't your bed."

In reply, Sasori merely grabbed the blonde's wrists.

"Let go, idiot," he said a bit louder, struggling against the iron grip. This was far too much for his head right now. Goodness knows if the red head didn't let go soon, he was going to do something really stupid.

Without a word, Sasori took both the sculptors hands into one of his and brought the other to the blondes face, slowly tracing the smooth, pale hands along his cheek and brushing against slightly parted lips.

Deidara stared, dumbstruck, into the black silhouetted figure of his partner, not daring to move. The touch, by now, had extended down his neck and was slowly working down his chest, leaving him feeling chilled, shuddering as the fingers ghosted over his nipple. Sasori continued to tantalize the blonde by barely touching the tender skin before abandoning it completely.

The blonde began to let out a whimper of protest before he felt cool lips where the hand had left off. Unconsciously, he shuddered again as Sasori's tongue began swirling around his nipple, teasing it into a bud and biting gently. He didn't even notice that the hand had trailed past his stomach until he felt the others' hard palm rubbing against him through his pants. He responded with a stifled gasp, trying to ignore the heat rushing below his belt.

Dammit, no! He's not…its not…he shuddered again, the pleasure and alcohol combining to completely destroy his thought process. No, don't look down! He bit his lip, trying to make sense of it all. Don't touch there! A part of him knew he was going to regret this later, but the adrenaline suddenly filling his veins screamed that right now he didn't give a damn. "Godammit, touch me, look at me!!" He yanked a hand free and pulled the puppet master away from his chest, bringing them eye to eye for a second, blue staring into soft brown.

Discarding the last of his good sense, Deidara grasped the other tightly and flipped them both over on their sides. Quickly, before either had a chance to rethink what they were doing, the blonde pressed his lips against Sasori's. Without hesitation, his partner kissed him back with such force as to leave him breathless. He tried to pull back, but the red head claimed his mouth again, this time trailing his tongue along the blondes soft lips. With a muffled gasp, the sculptor complied, parting his lips to grant Sasori entry. Their tongues battled for dominance momentarily before the Deidara gave in and allowed the other to ravish his mouth as he savored the citrus-y taste of his danna.

He pulled away with a sharp intake of breath when he felt those cool fingers slip beneath his pants and begin to tease him, making the fabric stretch tighter across his hips. The red head's thumb brushed over the tip of his member, teasing the erection, but he pulled it away suddenly.

"I-iie," Deidara breathed, obviously displeased with the loss of contact.

Without a word and faster than the blonde would have thought possible, his partner had the pants off and piled in a heap somewhere on the floor. Sasori quickly established his dominance again and had Deidara on his back once more, allowing his hand to trace lightly along the length of the erection.

The blonde was too preoccupied with the fantastic sensation that he didn't notice the red head had abandoned his mouth until the other's mouth and hand were working on his nipples, tracing the tender skin, alternating between soft and almost forceful touches that just about sent Deidara over the edge.

"Ngh…hah," he bit back a moan, trying to hold in his pleasure.

Sasori glided his fingers along the shaft lightly, barely touching the skin and sending shivers running down the blonde's spine. With a sudden movement, his hand grasped the erection and worked in a few aggressive strokes before returning to the gentle caresses. Deidara gulped in air as the fingers repeated the motion and he let out a strangled moan. Instead of letting go this time, however, the red head brought his other hand down, switching hands until the variety was almost driving the blonde crazy. Cool, hard fingers ran up and down the shaft, lightly brushing over the head as if by accident, then massaging the soft skin at the base, pushing the blonde closer and closer to his peak.

Just as the familiar tingling sensation began prickling down his spine and all his muscles started tensing, Sasori's hold tightened painfully, bringing the other down a few notches.

"Agh! Danna! I w-wanna…" Deidara spluttered, trying to squirm away from the tight grip that restricted his blood flow. He bit back a moan. "Dammit…hah…let me…c-come…"

Not even loosening his fingers, Sasori's lips pulled into an almost dangerous smile before capturing the blondes panting mouth to silence him. Their tongues danced for only a moment before the red head pulled away with the same smile on his pale face. "Not 'til I say." The voice was deeper and somehow not as clear as usual. This change sent another shudder running through the blonde, the movement only making his quivering member ache even more.

Hard fingers proceeded to coax open the blondes mouth and delved into the wet cavern. Quite preoccupied with the pain in his lower area, the blonde could only moan distractedly and allow them to enter his mouth. Trying to ignore it, he began to suck on the digits, swirling his tongue around the faux skin and biting down gently. A muffled intake of breath was his only response before the fingers were removed.

With nothing left to divert him, the blonde could only focus on the other hand clamped down on his member. It hurt ridiculously so to be kept constantly near the climax but denied release. However, the immense pleasure kept building, with no where to go. It was so uncomfortable, but, at the same time, so utterly fantastic that he couldn't help but squirm and curl his toes.

His reflection was interrupted seconds later by a digit brushing up against his entrance. Deidara let out a gasp of surprise as he felt the finger circle around the hole softly before pressing in slowly.

It was all he could do to hold in a moan as it dove deeper inside him. The feeling was so unfamiliar and strange but it sent another wave of heat rushing towards his aching erection. Before giving him the chance to get completely used to it, Sasori pushed another finger inside.

"Ngh…mmnn…a-ah…" he struggled to keep quiet as the two digits began thrusting in and out in a slow rhythm. Once he had gotten past the initial pain, this feeling was beyond amazing. It was almost enough to distract him from the painful hold on his member. Without thinking, the blonde started rocking his hips back at a matching pace to increase the sensation.

Too soon, the blonde thought, the red head pulled his hand away. His panting turned to whimpering and he reached his hands up to clutch at Sasori's bare back. He hadn't even noticed when the other had removed his clothes. And he wasn't at all prepared when he felt something larger press against his entrance.

Even slower than he had done with his fingers, Sasori pushed himself into the blonde with a muted grunt until he was sheathed to the hilt.

This time, however, Deidara was unable to stifle his cry. It felt like he was being split open, spreading fire through his insides. His eyes watered and he shut them, trying to block it out.

After waiting a moment, the red head began to move, pulling out slightly and pushing back in tentatively.

The burning sensation every time the other moved seemed to lessen with each short thrust until nothing was left but the intense pleasure that shot through his body. As before, Deidara started moving up into the red head when the tiny movements ceased to be enough to satisfy him.

In direct response, the red head let go of his partner's shaft to place both hands on his hip and deepen the thrusts. Finally, he pulled himself almost completely out and plunged back in, setting another, more violent rhythm. Deidara could no longer contain the sounds bursting from his lips. His aching erection, though temporarily somewhat subdued after the pain and shock of the entrance, was already jumping again, the precum dribbling down.

Without warning, Sasori reached a hand to begin frantically stroking the enlarged member. It was all too much for Deidara to take anymore. His slender hands desperately clutched at the sheets beneath him and, with a cry, he released.

The tensing of all his muscles must have sent the red head to his climax as well because, seconds later Sasori came as well. He let out a restrained moan and thrust fiercely into the other a few more times before pulling out and rolling over.

It felt so…weird to have someone come inside him. Deidara sighed, suddenly exhausted. Realizing his chest was sticky with his own seed, he reached over to the bedside table, pulled out a tissue and cleaned himself off. With that, he too rolled over and fell asleep, overwhelmingly content.

He was awoken that morning by a loud groan right next to him. Apparently Sasori hadn't moved from where he had crashed that night. Unwilling to open his eyes, he merely turned over, pretending he was still asleep. The blonde was surprised, however, when a sore, aching pain shot from his thighs up through his back.

"What the hell," a groggy voice complained, followed by a rustling of blankets. "My head…oh gods…what the hell happened? My head fucking hurts."

Deidara smirked into his pillow. That's what he got, the stupid drunk. Wait, he didn't know what happened? So that probably meant…

"Deidara?" Sasori's voice was riddled with absolute bewilderment. "What are you doing in my bed?"

The blondes eyes shot open at this. Wait, what!? Oh gods, no way! He looked across the room from where he was to look at his own bed. No way! Sasori didn't remember anything about last night because he had been completely wasted, and this wasn't even his bed. No wonder the red head had attacked him in the first place!

Aw damn, I don't even want to know what he'll say when he sees that I'm naked…