the tenth chapter of indiana jones dot com.
Indy was lucking sore out of fuck. he was flying with andy towards jobe's space mountain fortress which was shaped like jobens mooning earth while leaning over a space floating mountan heh. but he had his hat and that made him smile.
"are you such a faggot"
"fuck you indy. after today jobens will finally love and respect me like he does you."
"hey kid, i don't know if you fucking noticed but that dude hates my guts. and fuck you too you little fat queer. go fuck yourself with a barbed wire pole. fuck you. fuck you!"
andy slapped hindy and flupped him around a bit.
"no more of that shit. we're both going to the same place so we might as well enjoy it."
the flight sucked ass because andy was weird. he tunred into a snake and back because fuck why not he said. he really said it.
they landed the ship in the main docking port which was joben's ass. jobens was wearing a black outfit with a really big collar like a sith. and he had a lightsaber.
"welcome junya. this is my fucking space palace. i see andy brought you."
"i need you to finally respect me as the person I am that you know."
"yeah whatever." jobens said as he used a box with a button on it to summon robots that looked like him in the face, but with chick's bodies to take indy and his hat and his whip to the prison. andy looked sad.
"june ya it is in this palace that I will fuck your shit up for good."
"I bet you woudn't be so tough if you didn't have that lightsaber." indy said.
"ahhh yes but I still have my hell powers. or did you fucking forget that when prince raped you."
"never mind. indy, what do you know of secrets?"
"i don't know what"
"they fuck you in the ass."
indy got throwed down.
"tonight when the moon eclipses, I will bring you to the main hall and you will understand the truth about why you're here."
indy sat around bored and jacked off a couple times before the robo jobo chicks came back and brought indniana jerones too the main base room place. there was a cool glossy black floor and lasers. andy was a snake and sat by jobens next to his throne. there was a big window behind them.
"indy. this is all destiny. your destiny."
"I'm getting sick of this shit." indy said and shot jobens. he bled, but then he pulled the bullet out of his chest and healed his self.
"shit. that hurt. but not really. anyways, look behind me. there's the earth and the eclipse is starting soon."
"the fuck should I care?"
"because everyone on that earth is gonna blow up." a big ass machine slid out, with a cut out part that looked like indiana jones if he fell through the snow in a looney tunes show but like metal.
"this is a laser that you're going to get into that's going to blow up the ath." he said in a boston accent suddenly.
"NO. I won't kill everyone I love. :'(" indy said with patriotic tears.
"too bad, this laser is powered by love, you, and the eclipse and i'm gonna force you into it."
"i have been planning this since the day you were born. once I became jobens I needed to kill everyone because shit sucks and then you die. so I time traveled to the future to make this. this space mountain fortress is inside a time fluxation, which means we exist outside of time and space. it is the only way I could destroy the earth and still live. and then I come back to bring you here so you could pwer the lazer."
"why didn't you make it for me jobens?" andy said. "I did everything you asked me to do, and you loved him more than me."
"fuck you andy you're a dumb snake transmorphigarp."
"is that all I am to you?"
"why would jobens build it for you andy?" indy said, holding his hands out in confuzzlment.
"after all this time you still don't understand." andy said. "the pieces have been in front of you from the beginning."
jobens looked pissed.
"you'll break the curse. you'll stop being a transmorphigarp if you tell him."
"he needs to know jobens. the truth is right in front of him."
"tell him after he destroys teh earth!" jobens said as he ordered the jobots to put him into the machine. "oh wait this'll kill him too, which is also what I've always wanted to dooO!"
the eclipse started. indy pulled out his whip and whipped the machine in the part he was supposed to go in but wasn't yet. it fell apart from his whip (and gun because he shot it too). the jobots all died too.
"NO!" Jobens said. "!"
he started crying all pissed off and shit. he held the parts of the robots and rubbed them on his body and licked them.
"now I can tell you the truth about you and I, indy."
"what the shit?" indy said.
"can't you tell yet? everything about us is so similar. indy. andy. it's amazing you found me. but it's destiny."
"what are you saying that you're me from the future or some bullshit." fuck that shit.
"no. I'm your...BROTHER!"
"WHAT!" Indy said as he started whipping andy. "tell me!"
"it's true june ya." jobens said. "I fucked a transmorphigarp from the future and this little fuckwad came out. I hid him in 2008, which is where I'm time traveling this space mountain fortress to go next."
"I can't believe it. NO. But it all makes sense now..." indy said.
"but jobens always loved you more because I'm a fatass snake and you're indiana fucking jones."
"but fuck andy...don't you know that a father's love doesn't mean everything?"
"we must fight now." jobens said and attacked indy. he punched him in the face a lot. andy just stood there. jobens whipped out his lightsaber which was pink but indy whipped it out of his hands and it exploded into sparkles.
"i guess I'll have to use my ABILITIES." jobens said and used lightning on indy. indy fell down and started crying up against the rail thing. he looked down and saw it went very far!
"andy...you have to help me."
andy watched as indy got fried more and more. he felt really bad.
"no. no! NOOO!" he said as he picked up jobens and was about to through him over the ledge.
"are you really gonna?" indy said. "this will all be over."
"andy..." andy said.
"if you don't kill me I'll love you" jobens said.
"andy he's a fucking dickhead. don't listen to him." indy said.
"what will you do?"
"don't fucking drump me! DON'T!"
"What will you do andy?" indy said.
"what will you do, son?" jobens said.
andy squeezed on the parts of jobens he was holding.
"I'd rather have your love then kill you." andy said as he threw jobens at indy.
"YAY!" jobens said.
"NO ANDY WHY?"
"because fuck you doctor jones. that's fucking why."
andy and jobens walked slowly and badassly towards indy. indy said goodbye to his hat and whip and thanked them for helping him.
But then an alien saucer crashed into the main room! And out of it came...MAC!
"JONESY!" mac said. the alien from crystal skull was behind him.
"you're that guy from the movie!" indy said.
"yep and the aliens were like dimensional travelers and shit. so now I know everything. and I'll save you now."
jobens screamed when he saw the alien. andy turned into a snake and attacked the alien. it died and instantly turned into the crustal skull again.
"shit that fucks up my plans pretty well." mac said.
dr. jones pushed buttons on the control.
"now I'm gonna crash this fucking thing into the earth and destroy it."
"you'll kill us?" idny siad.
"fuck no. not me or my good son, at least. it might kill you if you don't escape."
he did a little jig.
"you've ruined part of my plans, but I still have many more. this is only one. I still have plan b and c and others. so don't think I'm done yet."
jobens used his quick travel to get him and andy into the compartment and blasted back to earth. there was no more escape chambers.
"oh no what am I gonna do."
"I'll stay with the ship and steer it away from fucking up the earth." mac said.
"but you die"
"yeah but who cares."
"yeah hahah. you suck. but what will I dooo?"
"do what you always do." mac said, and pointed at a refridgerator. indy hugged mac and did cartwheels into the refridgerator. the ship exploded as it destroyed the moon, but indy safely landed in new mexico on earht.
"shit I'm alive. but where am I, what day and time is it, and where is jobens and andy?" indy said.
he didn't know the answer, but fuck he had to find out soon, or the earht was doomed forever.