Welcome back to the third and final installment of Playing Hooky. To everyone who's reviewed, thank you so much. It means the world to me. This story will break my record of maximum reviews, and people who enjoy it, really. I hope you enjoy it, and please leave me another review.

Yes, this one is rated M, a lemon is here. If you don't like it (which you shouldn't be reading much on this site if you don't), don't read.

Beta is, as always, the awesome 3DG. I hope you enjoy!

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Playing Hooky

Shizune fumed at the empty office. Gone again. She knew it was that pervert's fault, and she intended to tell Tsunade off heartily when she finally dragged her lazy bones in. Hearing a knock on the door, she called for the person to enter.

"Tsunade-baa-chan, I can't find Ero-sennin anywhere! How am I supposed to train if he's gone?" Naruto rambled without realizing the party he conversed to was nowhere nearby. "Eh? Shizune-san, where's Tsunade-baa-chan?"

Still in her own mutterings, Shizune let slip, "Probably with that aptly named Ero-sennin."

Naruto blinked for a moment. "What??" He took off to find Jiraiya with more fervor than usual.

--

Tsunade toweled her wet hair, standing in Jiraiya's bathroom. He stood in front of the mirror, shaving off the morning stubble with a kunai.

"I never understood how you could do that! One slip or surprise, and you could kill yourself!"

He chuckled. "It's a bit of a man thing. And if something does happen, I just come running to you."

"Just watch me not save your sorry ass next time you almost kill yourself doing that!"

He turned, wiping his face with a towel. "It gives me a closer shave than any razor I've found. It makes me kissably smooth!"

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek softly. "Yeah, I'll have to give you that."

He laughed again, that distinctly male sound the rumbled over her skin like silk-wrapped thunder. She shivered slightly and pressed her body against his side. The look in her eyes spoke worlds to him, and he kissed her softly.

Tsunade growled at the small kiss. She wanted more, she wanted him, and she wanted it like only her Baka could give. She deepened the kiss, grabbing his hair and crushing his mouth to hers, trying to devour him.

Jiraiya merely chuckled and picked her up. "Oh, Hime. It seems that you aren't quite well enough for work today. Doctor Toad Sage says strict bed rest and physical activities are the best medicine."

"Why just bed rest? There are plenty of places besides the bed that can help me feel better." Her voice had gotten low and sultry, and it sent shivers up his spine.

"Really? What are you suggesting?"

She grinned, a playful twinkle in her honey-brown eyes. "The wall."

Navigating over to said object, Jiraiya rearranged her so that her legs were around his waist, her arms around his neck, and her body pressed deliciously between the wall and him. "As you wish. Anything else I can do to alleviate your sickness?"

"Please, Baka." Her face flushed. "I don't want to beg."

His eyes darkened as his almost-constant smile turned into something sinful. "But I want to hear you beg for it, I want to hear you scream my name."

She shivered under his gaze and moved her hips slowly. "Baka, I want you."

A hand slid down from her back to squeeze her rear end softly. "That sounds good, keep going." His hand kneaded her flesh as he leaned his face down to nip at her neck.

A fine tremble ran along her skin as she leaned her head back to allow him access to more skin. "Jiraiya, please, I need you to..." Her face grew red. Even as a grown woman, she never needed to vocalize her need, and it was awkward to her. "Please," she whispered.

He slipped a finger into her wetness, and chuckled. "You're already wet. Your body begging is best." He pulled her down just a little, and she moaned as his manhood brushed against her. "Is this what you want, princess?"

She kissed him passionately and moved her hips to the perfect angle. "Yes, if you'll just hurry up already!" She hated being teased, and this was the worst kind.

He slid into her slowly and she moaned, fitting perfectly with his size. He smiled, loving the look on her face, loving the feel when she was around him, loving her. He kissed her again as he started moving his hips.

Her moans began to match his thrusts, and she gave in to begging, "Please, harder."

He gave one powerful thrust that caused a delightful shiver in her legs. "Like that?"

"Yes. Don't you dare stop."

Chuckling, he started a pace at that same force, and her moans picked up speed and volume. After a moment, he stopped entirely, wedged deep within her.

Tsunade looked at him with a quirk in her brow.

He smiled, "If I don't slow down I'm going to have a heart attack." He kissed the area just above her breasts, "You've still got the vibrance of a young woman, but I'm just an old man."

She laughed a little and pulled his head to rest on her chest. "You're not that old. I think there's a solution to your old man problem." She looked over to the bed.

"You've always had the best ideas." He still held on to her as he walked them over to the bed. Sitting down, she was left in his lap. Laughing, she pushed him over and began to move her hips against him. He shivered and held on to her sides for leverage as he added those mind-breaking thrusts. Her head fell back and she squeaked as the impact manipulated her airflow. Laughter from both parties came and went as they reset the pace, the old bed creaking as the two felt their goals quickly approaching. And with a loud crack, mutual yells of each other's name, and a scream of horror, the world exploded for the two legendary Sannin.

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"Damnit. Hime, you broke my bed."

"Damnit, Baka, you might have alerted the whole town to us."

He laughed as she moved down against his body to hide her chest from their unwanted guest.

"Tsunade-baa-chan? Ero-sennin? What the hell are you two doing in bed together? Naked??" Naruto fainted dead away on the floor.

Another bout of laughter erupted as they got dressed and waited for Naruto to wake up.

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"And so she's finally given in, and we're going to stay together."

Naruto blinked for a moment, "So you two are dating?"

Tsunade sat down beside Naruto. "Sort of. After you've known someone for so long, it those lines aren't as defined as when you're younger."

Naruto shrugged. "I just never want to see a sight like that again."

"Then knock next time!"

"I did! All I heard was screaming, and so I thought that someone had come to attack you, and I busted the door down to try and save you. Then my eyes burned out of my head."

Tsunade smacked him softly (for her), smiling. "I'm happy, Naruto. And so is Jiraiya. That's rare for shinobi our age, of any age."

"Well, I'm glad you two are happy, but I think I'm gonna get the hell out of here. I've gotta go get that off my mind, dattebayo."

--

"Is Naruto going to go tell the whole world?"

"Probably." Jiraiya stretched out on his broken bed.

"What do we do? No one really was supposed to know about us."

"All that we can do is face it. But I know what I want to do."

"Hmm? What are you talking about?"

His eyes opened. "Tsunade, marry me. It's all I've wanted my whole life, and it's about damn time, too."

Tsunade sat back for a moment and thought. Did she really want to marry this old pervert who made her the happiest woman in Konoha? "Yes."

"Huh?"

"I said yes, Baka. I'll marry you."

He leaned up and moved to kiss her softly. "Then we get to play hooky for a whole week during our honeymoon! How soon can we leave?"

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I hope you enjoyed this piece of fluff. Please, read and review!