Don't Leave Me, Annabeth! the soap opera

by: Miss AnnabethandPercy4Ever

(cue corny theme song)

It's PJO! (picture of smiling Percy)

PJO, PJO, PJO! (picture of Annabeth yelling)

Drama! sadness! (picture of Nico doing the chicken dance)

Death! Destruction! (picture of Thalia doing the macarena)

Hatred! Dancing! (picture of Clarisse pummeling someone)

Laughter! Fun! (picture of blond girl Emma reading)

Take a look! (picture of dark and depressing kid Travis)

It's not in a book! (picture of Grover tap dancing)

No reading rainbow! (picture of Luke saluting camera)

It's on TV!

And it's called:

(Duh da da duh da duh duh!)

Don't Leave me, Annabeth!

(we see Percy on the phone)

Percy: Yeah. Okay, Annabeth. I'll see you... OR WILL I? I love you, my love! You love me too? Wait, you're just joking?! You thought I was joking?!

(Percy starts crying)

Percy: Good bye, Annabeth! Go kiss Luke! Waaaaa!

(Percy hangs up)

Percy: I hate my life!


(a kid dressed in black enters Percy's room with a paintball gun)

Travis: Freeze, loser!

Percy: Aaaagh! I should have been nicer to Annabeth! I'm dying! I'm dying!

Travis: I haven't even shot you yet.

Percy: Oh yeah.

Travis: Whatever. I'm going to go and think of how depressed I am.


(Travis leaves)

Percy: I don't get him.


Percy: I know! I'll call Emma! She always knows what to do!

(Percy dials phone)

Percy: Yeah! Hi Emma! Wait, what do you mean you're busy? (sob) I have no one to talk to!

(Percy hangs up phone)

(Clarisse enters, beating up Grover)

Clarisse: I'm deranged!


Percy: Grover! Help me, buddy!

Grover: I'm too weak to break free from the man!

Percy: What man?

Grover: (looks at camera) The man.

Percy: You mean Dionysus?

Grover: Shush! Don't say his name!


Clarisse: Hey, Jellyfish Head! Help me beat up the hippie!

Percy: Nah. Not today. Water power, activate! (wave carries Clarisse through door)

Grover: Thanks, man. You are so totally groovy.

Percy: Great.

Grover: Righteous.

Percy: Yeah.

Grover: Oh yeah.

Percy: So oh yeah.

Grover: Where's Annabeth?

(Percy starts crying)

Percy: I'm never talking to her again! Waaaa!

Grover: Don't cry, man. Recycle!


Percy: I'll call her tomorrow.

Grover: Be groovy and stay clear from the man!

(Grover exits)

Percy: Oh, Annabeth! I love you and always will! Ah, I think I'm having a demigod monster attack!

(three cardboard monsters are pushed into camera view by Travis, who quickly exits)

Percy: Water power, activate!

(wave carries away cadboard monsters)

Percy: Oh no! I'm hurt! I'm dying!

(Luke enters)

Luke: I'll carry thee to ye olde hospital, fair maiden!

Percy: But I'm a boy!

Luke: That dost not matter-eth. I shall rescue thou if my name be-ist Sir Lukey Hokey Pokey!

Percy: But it's not! (sob)

Luke: I dost change it, a fortnight yonder yester-year.

Percy: Huh?

Luke: Thou be-ist slow as a slug!


(Luke carries Percy bridal-style out of the room)

Mysterious voice with bad Italian accent: The end-a of episode-a one-a.

(Percy's head appears on a hypnosis swirling circle, smiling happily)