Okay, time for a random new story. I'm getting bored with my other one and need a new one to keep me interested. Plus, i've wanted to write a story about kashi before his dad died. Well, actually, this isn't BEFORE he died, he just didn't kill himself to begin with, but for some unexplanable reason, Kakashi is still the Copy Ninja and had his horrible past...oh, and Minato isn't dead either, he's too cool to die.

WARNING: this will be your one and only warning, this story contains INCEST, so if you don't care for that, i suggest you click on the back button on your browser and find something else to read. I suppose i should warn you about the graphic yaoi lemons too...Alright, well, you've been forewarned, so don't flame me!

"Sakumo, you're back early!" the gatekeeper called to the elder Hatake as he strolled into the village.

"Yup, the Hokage exaggerated the danger of my mission. Has my son done anything I should know about?"

"Nope. He hasn't blown up any buildings or set fire to anyone's wheat fields. He's been a good boy for once."

"Hm…then he's planning to blow up a building or set fire to someone's crop."

The two men shared a laugh and Sakumo continued on his way. He walked casually to the Hokage Tower greeting his friends and fans the whole way.

"Sakumo, it's good to see you're not dead," Minato said as the slightly older jounin let himself into his office unannounced.

"Me? Dead? Haven't you heard, Minato? I'm going to live forever just to spite Kakashi."

Minato laughed, "Oh, yes, I forgot. So how did it go?"

"Eh, same old, same old. Killed a few people, saved the damsel in distress, you know, the usual."

"Well, good, that's one less thing for me to worry about. Now go home and take a shower. You smell like dried blood and sweat."

"You say that like you've never smelled like that before, Hokage-sama," he said Minato's title like it was a dirty word.

"You're just jealous because Sarutobi asked ME to be Hokage and not YOU."

"How do you know he didn't ask me? Hm? Maybe he asked and I just refused."

Minato laughed out loud, "Sarutobi did not spend the better half of his life turning the village into the prosperous town that it is just to turn it over to the likes of YOU."

"What is THAT supposed to mean?"

"You would turn this whole place into your own personal playboy mansion if you were the Hokage."

"What are you talking about? It's ALREADY my own personal playboy mansion."

They both laughed.

"Dammit if you're not right," Minato said with a sigh, "How is it that, even though I'm the Hokage, you get laid more than me?"

"I'm just more awesome than you, Minato. When are you gonna realize that?"

"Probably never. Now, like I said before, leave, you're starting to make me gag."

"Oh, grow some balls, Minato."

"I already have a perfectly nice pair of balls, thank you very much, and I should think you, of all people, would know that since you seem to like to fiddle with them when you suck my cock."

"It was a figure of speech," Sakumo said indignantly.

"I know, I was just messing with you. So should I expect a visit from you tonight, AFTER you take a shower that is?"

"I dunno…I'm kinda tired."

"Alright, I won't even bothering trimming it up then."

"Aw, you clean up just for me?"

"Of course. I wouldn't want my balls to be too disastrous for my favorite lover."

"I'm touched. See ya around, Minato," Sakumo called over his shoulder as he headed out the door.

"See ya later, Saku-chan!"

"Stop calling me that!"

"Make me!"

Sakumo walked home fantasizing about how he would 'punish' Minato later for calling him Saku-chan and was almost a little disappointed when he finally arrived. He didn't like thinking about sex when talking to his son. It made him feel weird.

He stood outside the door for a moment listening. He couldn't hear much of anything, so he figured Kakashi either wasn't home or he was taking a nap. Sakumo entered the house silently in case he was doing the latter. He crept down the hall towards his bedroom.

"Oh…Kashi…" someone moaned erotically.

Sakumo turned his head to the left and his jaw dropped. On the couch, his son and his best friend, Iruka, were fooling around, half-naked. Kakashi was lying on top of the younger boy with his tongue down his throat and hands…gods only knew where, Sakumo couldn't tell. Iruka had his hands tangled in Kakashi's hair and his legs wrapped around Kakashi who was grinding his hips against him. Both were moaning quietly.

Sakumo stared in shock for a few heartbeats.

Oh my gods, my son is gay. And with IRUKA? When did this happen? And why didn't he tell me?

Kakashi kissed down Iruka neck and chest and stopped to tease his hard nipples. Iruka bent his head back and slowly opened his eyes as he moaned. When his eyes opened, he saw Sakumo, but wasn't really sure if he was there, or if it was just his imagination. After the supposed illusion didn't disappear, Iruka realized it was really him.

"Oh, dear…" Iruka said and pushed at Kakashi's shoulder.

"Hm…?" Kakashi asked, not looking up and continuing his way down Iruka's body.

"Kakashi," Iruka said, not taking his eyes off the paralyzed Sakumo.

"Hm?" Kakashi asked again.

"Um, dude, I think you should stop now."

"What?" Kakashi asked, confused, "Why?" he still didn't stop.

"Because your father is home."

That stopped him. He froze completely, not even breathing. He slowly lifted his head up to look and see that his father was, in fact, home. He was still standing in the hallway, staring.

Dead silence followed as the two Hatakes stared at each other.

Kakashi finally broke the silence, "Otou-sama…you're home early."

"Yeah, my…uh…mission was um…easier than expected."

"I see…"

More awkward silence.

"Well um," Sakumo started, "I was just going to…uh…take a shower…and um…go out with Minato…so…I'll um…leave you two alone."

He dashed off to his bedroom at the end of the hall. He closed the door behind himself and leaned heavily on it, sliding down to the ground.

He wasn't exactly surprised that Kakashi was gay, and he wasn't even hurt that Kakashi hadn't told him, what bothered him was the fact that seeing his son without a shirt and licking his way down someone else's body had excited him.

He looked down at the front of his pants and found himself partially hard and remembering what he'd just seen made him grow even more.

What is wrong with me? He's my SON. I probably just need to get laid. Yeah, that's it. I'm just horny. It has nothing to do with Kakashi. It has absolutely nothing to do with my extremely sexy, scantily clad son sucking on someone's nipple and grinding his hips against their body…

Sakumo shook his head, trying to rid himself of the fantasy that he was creating in his mind. The mental pictures had made him completely hard and he was disgusted with himself.

He got up to go take a cold shower.

"Well, he took that well," Iruka said to Kakashi who was still frozen, staring at the spot where his father had just been standing. He was absolutely mortified.

"Are you insane? He freaked out."

"Nah, he didn't look freaked. He didn't look angry or even disgusted. He just looked stunned."

"Give him time. He'll been disgusted in a few minutes."

"Whatever, just be glad it wasn't MY father who caught us. If it had been my father, one of us would be bleeding already, maybe even begging for death."

"You exaggerate."

"No, I'm serious. He's so homophobic; it makes me want to hurt him sometimes. If he knew I was gay, he'd probably disown me. No, that would be too merciful; he'd definitely kill me to rid his family of such an abomination."

"You're so dramatic. You dad loves you. He wouldn't kill you because you were gay. You're his SON. How could he kill his own son?"

"Don't underestimate the man. And he doesn't love me. Why should he when he's got six other sons who are all bigger, stronger, and straighter than me?"

"They aren't stronger. You're a jounin and they're only chunin. Some of them are still genin."

"That's not what I meant. I might be a better shinobi, but when it comes to brute strength, they all out-weight me by at least a hundred pounds."

"Yeah, but they're also slow and stupid."

"My father doesn't care about smarts. All he cares about is physique and I'm small and slight. I'm a disgrace. He doesn't even refer to me as his son. I'm just 'the runt' or 'that other one'," Ruka finished bitterly.

"Just forget him, Ruka, you don't need him. You're better than all your idiot brothers and if your father can't see that, then he's even dumber than them."

Iruka smiled and ruffled Kakashi's hair, "This is why you're my fuck buddy. You're an amazing lay AND you tell me I'm awesome. What more could a guy ask for from his secret lover?"

Kakashi grinned, momentarily forgetting his worries, but then suddenly remembered them when he heard the shower turn on in the other room. His grin faded and then vanished completely.

"What am I going to do, Ruka?"

"I don't know why you're so worried. You dad's cool. He probably won't even care. Personally, I think he's gay too."

Kakashi gave him a look, "You're just saying that because you want in his pants."

"Well, yeah. Your dad is fucking HOTT!" he said loud enough for Sakumo to hear in the shower.

The older man looked up in interest and decided to eavesdrop on their conversation since it WAS about him, it seemed.

"Dude, you just took wrong to a whole other level," Kakashi said. Sakumo was saddened a bit, but would never have admitted it if you'd asked.

"It must be painful."


"Living with such a sexy piece of ass and not being able to tap it."

"He's my FATHER!"

"I mean, knowing he's in the other room, buck naked, dripping wet, and all slick with soap…I tempted to go in there."

"Dude, if you sleep with my dad, I'm never having sex with you again, ever."

"Something tells me if I sleep with your dad, I won't need you anymore."

Kakashi didn't say anything. He just moved off Iruka and started to put his shirt on. That last comment had truly hurt him. Lots of people he'd slept with had slept with his dad and many of them said he wasn't as good. They said he was a disappointment and, although Kakashi played it off like he didn't care what people said, it still hurt.

"Hey, dude, I was just kidding."

"Well, it wasn't funny."

"I know, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply that he was better than you."

"He probably is."

"You don't know that."

"A lot of people seem to think so."

"Well, I think you're amazing and I would never sleep with your dad. It would be weird. He's too old for me and…and what do I need him for when I have you?"

"You've also never slept with him."

"Yes…well…I don't need to. I'm satisfied with you."

"It's just…it hurts, you know?" Kashi said, sitting down next to Iruka, "My whole life I've been compared to him and I've never measured up. I've never been as good a shinobi as him and I probably never will be, and that doesn't bother me, but…I didn't think they would compare how good we are in bed. And I definitely didn't think they would be rude enough to tell me right to my face that I was nothing compared to him."

"It doesn't matter, Kashi. How could they possibly expect you to be as good as him? He's been having sex for decades. You've only had a couple years' worth of experience. They haven't even given you a chance."

"It wouldn't matter anyway. I'll never be as good as him. I'll always just be 'the son of the White Fang'."

"Don't say that, Kashi. You're not just 'the son of the White Fang', you're 'sharingan Kakashi, the Copy Ninja'."

"So, as a shinobi, I have my own nickname, but when it comes to sex, did you know they call him 'Konoha's sex god'? How am I supposed to beat that?" Kakashi asked forlornly.

"You could be 'the number one sex god of Konoha'," Iruka said jokingly.

Kakashi actually laughed, "Ah, my little dolphin, you are such an idiot sometimes."

Iruka grinned, "It seems to be the one thing I get from my father."

They both laughed and Kakashi let himself forget to worry about how his father would react.

Sakumo stood in the shower, letting the cold water slam against his back, feeling like shit. He'd had no idea that Kakashi had had such a hard time because of him. He'd known that his reputation as the White Fang was daunting, but he hadn't known about Kakashi's bedroom problems. He couldn't believe people actually told him, to his face, that he wasn't as good. He felt like it was his fault, and, technically, it was, but he hadn't meant to do it. He'd never have guessed that his reputation as a sex god would make Kakashi's sex life difficult. Although, now that he thought about it, it did make sense. Of course anyone he'd already slept with would compare Kakashi to him. How could they not? If he ever found out who'd said the hurtful things to Kakashi, Sakumo would make sure to hurt them back. No one fucked with is son and got away with it.

"Let's go get some food, man, I'm starving," Iruka suggested and Kakashi agreed, if only because he didn't want to still be in the house when his father finished his shower.

They left and Sakumo climbed out of the shower and sprawled on his bed to air dry and think about what to do with his son. He felt he should talk to him, but he wasn't really sure how to go about it.

Maybe I should just act like nothing happened. Or maybe I should tell him I'm a little gay myself. He's clearly afraid that I'll be disgusted with him, so I should let him know that I'm not. Gods, this is going to be harder than it sounds, I just know it…