Greetings Fanfic folk! I have returned with what I promised. This is the first chapter of Gabe's point of view, so in a way it is the sequel to All That I've Got...1. I decided to leave the same title cuz it's less confusing for those who already read it. Anyhow, please keep in mind that this is just a pilot chapter. In accordance to how you, the reader, react to this story, plot, whatever, I will continue with Chapter 2. Otherwise I can just delete it and we can all pretend I never wrote it.
WARNING. The chapter is slow in a way just like November was because just like Bella, Gabe had his issues. It took me a while to get back on roll with Gabe because I forgot how he was and how he thought. But six hours into it and I remebered so I hope you guys like it.
The house was abandoned…and I had dirt in my eyes, I didn't know which was more annoying.
I could see through a large window at the vast room. It looked despondent in the dark of night. My chance for survival, my only chance was not there. It was fine though; the pain was bearable compared to having had to supplicate to that human lover. Or at least that is what I kept telling myself. My insides had been screaming with the pangs of hunger ever since I had surfaced. The human hiker I had tried to unsuccessfully take had batted me on the side of the head with his walking stick after I had dithered on my attack on him. Though it had been a waste of food I had made sure he wouldn't be able to hike much after that. It hadn't been like I could have drunk his blood anyhow, the curse was as powerful as ever. I was in my own personal hell after all.
And they were still gaining up on me…why couldn't they just leave me alone?
I had traveled across the world, even gone into it and they still came. It wasn't like I had done anything atrocious to deserve this.
Okay, yes I had insulted and killed a couple of them; actually enjoyed myself while doing it…but didn't they know anything about the concept of forgiveness?
"Pricks," I muttered glowering into the empty house and at my reflection. A pair of black eyes stared back; it took a minute for me to realize they were mine.
What to do now? Carlisle Cullen had been my last resource. Without him available I would…I would what? Die? It was much too late for that.
Just what exactly had I wanted from the man? I had only met him a century ago but I had gotten the impression even then that he was different. When I had discovered he was a human lover I hadn't been surprised, he had been too soft, much too kind.
Maybe that was what I had wanted…
Ooh look at me, I'm such a sensitive vampire. It is no wonder I never cried and talked about my feelings with my screaming victims like Carlisle probably would have.
There wasn't much I could do anymore. I could keep running but it would be more like crawling now; I had no strength in me. Walking was a chore, every bone in my body ached and my muscles felt as if they were suffering from atrophy. Even breathing came short and raspy when I tried. It was idiotic; I was already dead, immortal. I shouldn't have needed to be worrying about any of this. But I knew it was inevitable, I hadn't fed in almost a year. My own body was drying slowly inside out and I couldn't escape the pain of it all. There were no anesthetics for me, I couldn't pass out from shock…I couldn't die.
I would be living like this forever.
I'll let them catch up, I thought dully as my knees gave up on me and I toppled to the ground, my head slamming on the pane of the window on my way down.
I laid on the ground staring at the stormy black sky swirling above me and felt stupid. I was Gabriel, a powerful elder of the Priam, centuries old and here I was bonking my head on piece of wood. In a few months or year I would resemble what humans called jerky and animals would chew on my body as soon as I lost the ability to move.
There was absolutely no possible way for me to sink lower than this.
I managed to get up slowly and made the decision of letting myself into Carlisle's home. It would be better than digging another hole to curl in or find a cave in my current condition. Griping the edge of the window to steady myself I punched the glass.
"You piece of—" I gasped under my breath.
Okay, this was it, I was downright pathetic.
My punch had not hurt the glass in any way. The only things suffering pain had been my brittle knuckles.
It was as if I was a human all over again. My strength, my speed, it was all gone. The only thing I didn't want was the one that would never leave me: my immortality.
I looked around and found a thick stone that fit just right on the palm of my hand but was still heavy enough to cause some damage.
While striking the window until I made a hole big enough for me to crawl through I finally resigned. I would wait for my pursuers. Hell, I would even throw them a welcome party when they arrived.
Even if they didn't kill me fast enough I knew I would die eventually. Besides, using a stone had been the last straw; there really wasn't much my ego could take anymore.
On my hands and knees I managed to get in. I crawled slowly to the farthest corner from my handmade entrance just as the first fat drops of rain began to pelt the ground.
In the empty house with only the rain as sound I closed my eyes and pretended I could sleep. Centuries had passed since I had been able to do it. Even the trance I had managed to put myself under when I had buried myself in the hole had not been enough. But maybe I had not tried hard enough. Maybe if I closed my pitch black eyes tight enough that their own darkness would complete mine …
Thunder rolled, hail began to fall with loud clatters wherever it fell and the rain came down like a sheet of liquid power. It was as if the elements themselves wanted me awake.
Every clap of thunder and every fallen drop of rain or hail had its own voice which wanted to be heard. It was like a chant or a chorus, 'You deserve this, you can't play the victim, you deserve this…'
Victim, was that what I was?
All the choices I had made, all the actions I had taken had led me to this. A lifetime of errors I had never acknowledged.
Once more I was forced to open my eyes and face the pain of what I had become.
I have fallen lower than low brother, is this what you wanted? I thought bitterly.
I closed my eyes and I could see Michael clearer than day, staring at me as if I was his whole universe, as if everything wonderful in this world happened to pop out of my as—hat.
"I tried to hold onto you Gabriel, but you always preferred to hold onto your grudge instead…"
"Why didn't you protect me from this then?" I asked him.
"Not hard enough!" I snapped and opened my eyes. There was no one with me but it didn't matter, I was too far gone. His memory, his voice and last words were still with me.
"Do you just remember the bad memories, what about the good Gabriel?"
Good memories…when had those happened? Maybe I had slept through them…ha, sleep, I'm funny.
"I can't take the blame for everything; some of this was your fault too."
"Damn it Michael, just shut up, shut up, it was your entire fault, you took everything too far," my face turned to the wall instinctively. No one could see my pain, I wouldn't let them. I was already weak I couldn't let anybody take anything else from me. Without my pain I realized nothing would be left.
"Will you hate me forever Gabriel?"
Those had been his last words to me but I hadn't answered. I had turned my back on him and never said what I really wanted.
A cold gust of wind tore into the room with a ghostly wail through the broken window. I could feel goose bumps rise all over my naked skin.
I was cold, I was immortal and a walking corpse but I was still cold…maybe if the trackers didn't hurry I could learn how to knit myself a pretty sweater.
I needed a hobby instead of talking to somebody who was not there.
"I never wanted to fight you," I finally admitted to the blank wall as I suppressed a shiver. I knew Michael wasn't there but I had never told him, I had to tell someone. "I'll always love you, but yes, I hate your guts pretty much about now."
Hours in the large room turned into days, which then morphed into weeks. With my eyes wide open I counted the times the sun would rise and set on me.
Now that I had given up, the anxiety of them catching up on me had turned the other way. They were being far too slow.
Where were they? Why hadn't trackers found me yet? Was it because they knew this was Carlisle's territory? Maybe the soft human lover was far more respected than I had thought, but that didn't help me; it was just a hindrance now.
How would I be able to leave this moronic world if trackers weren't around to rip my head off?
But still I waited patiently. They would come eventually, I wouldn't suffer forever.
When the odd rumbling noise approached a final night I couldn't help but feel smug. The elders thought they were punishing me; it hadn't occurred to them that they would actually be the ones setting me free. I had always said they were idiots; turns out I had been right all along.
Come on, come on, I'm waiting, get on with it already…
There was a metallic slam followed by slow steps.
Just how good were these trackers nowadays? At the pace this new tracker was going I would be able to decapitate it even in my pathetic condition. For a moment I felt a stab of annoyance. How dare those straw-stuffed elders send mediocre bounty trackers after me? It was a personal insult.
The tracker stopped at the front door for a moment then I heard him come in cautiously.
My body had long ago come to a standstill. It wouldn't move unless I exerted great force on it. The pang of the thirst had become a staple to my body like an extra ghost limb so I was able to ignore it now that it I had given in into it. The pain of it was already a feeling I could no longer recall not feeling.
So why was it that now that I had gotten used to this hell on earth that it could possibly get worse?
As soon as the door had opened the miniscule breeze had flown through and brought with it a scent so…so…
How was it that something so stunning to the very extent of the word could be so horrifying at the same time?
It lighted up my long-numbed senses in the flash of a second and made every inch of my body shudder as if from an electric shock. For a moment a memory of what I used to be, how I used to feel, came back rushing to me: the power, strength, security…it was all there. But just as the scent had awoken my dormant self it made the curse stronger.
This scent, it was as if it had come to rub on my face just exactly what I could no longer have. The thirst along with the pain intensified to an unbearable point.
I was torn; I wanted for it to just be over so that I could die in my little corner in peace. But I also wanted to smell, the scent was so striking, even soothing in its own way…I wanted to keep inhaling forever which somehow terrified me.
"I know that…"
I blinked in shock at the soft voice, realizing for the first time that the scent itself hadn't come out of nowhere but from a person.
A human girl
A growl of frustration threatened to escape me but I kept it back. Here I was, starving to death and the most delicious blood I had ever encountered came to me willingly and I couldn't even drink it.
Okay, I took it back, I hated Michael; I would hate him forever for this.
"Please don't say it…not out of pity…"
I could hear the halting shuffling steps on the hallway as they came closer. Soon the human would enter the room and see me here. Would I be able to take her? Her smell was so intoxicating, it made me light headed I couldn't begin to imagine even the damn curse having the ability of stopping me from taking her. How could anyone stop from taking her?
"I never cared about that…"
A pale face floated into the room, more like staggered actually. The girl was holding slightly onto the wall as if she was about to pass out. Her heart-shaped face was framed with messy brown hair and her pair of bright eyes swept the floor full with the evidence of my handy work.
The full moon's light made her exposed pale skin to glow so that it seemed as if she was the source from where the light came from. Her mouth was opened in a small o as she kept on walking into the room.
I wanted her, I wanted her more than I had wanted anything in all my years of immortality, and there had been plenty of those. My mind began to wildly imagine what the hot liquid would taste like in my mouth. It nearly drove me up the wall.
She walked further into the room, stirring up a breeze as she went. Every step brought her closer to me. My stiff arms tingled at the prospect of the hunt.
And just as I was about to go for it, I felt it, the wave of sickness only the curse could bring. It was like the turning of a coin, polar opposites.
Just as the blood had enticed me a moment ago, I could feel it repulse every fiber of my being now. Like human sickness, it nauseated me and made me recoil but it was just my body the only thing the curse could affect. In my head I knew the smell was ideal, I knew I would die to taste that blood but my body said otherwise and I wouldn't be able to do anything about it.
I shut my eyes and stopped from breathing. My teeth gritted in fury, why did this happen to me? Was she a fragment of my imagination created to torture me? It wasn't enough that suffering was now normal in my daily life, like oxygen for a human, now this scent…
Maybe if I didn't breath it in and ignored her, it would be much more bearable. Of course that in order for that to work she would have to not notice me, which she did.
"Did you break the window?" she asked in her soft voice.
"My, how did you come to that conclusion you brilliant child?" I wanted to snap but thought against it. Talking would require for me to breath, even turn to her.
"You're trespassing, I'm going to call the cops," she said a little bit louder.
Stupid, stupid girl, what was she doing here anyway? My life was complicated as it was, I didn't need her to make it worse with her perfect smell, perfect blood…
For a moment fury coursed through my body making me warm; I would kill them. Kill all those senile elders with God complexes for thinking they could just do this to me, make me so impotent, and get away with it.
"Here, wear this while I go to make a call," she began to come nearer. Every move she made sent shocks of hunger and revulsion through me. I couldn't take it any longer.
"Go away, don't get near me," I spat finally turning to her. She stopped short only a few feet away. The thick coat she had been holding out to me fell to the ground in a flutter as she stared at me. I watched in detached interest as her expression went from concern, to surprise, to naked fear in the time span of a second.
I wasn't surprised when she fell back in her attempt to get away from me; it was a reaction I was used to causing. I hadn't made it happen in quite a while, it made me feel nostalgic. Squirmy running humans were always fun sport.
She scrambled from the floor and rushed out the door. I winced at the loud rumble of the vehicle she drove. Only after I was sure she was a good ten miles away did I allow myself to breath but instantly regretted it.
At some point she had bled. The smell of it was still trapped in the room, it made me salivate and gag at the same time. I turned to look at the coat she had dropped and stared at it for a while. It radiated with the scent. Even after the potent smell of the blood had receded the scent of the coat remained.
Without thinking I reached for it and held it close, inhaling deeply. With herculean effort I managed to stand, still gripping the coat close. It was much too small for me to wear but it had retained her warmth. Unsteadily I walked across the room and out the front door. The moon cast everything in its silvery glow, even the trees looked like they shined.
I stood silent on the porch staring at the darkened turn beyond the trees that probably led to the road and wondered where she had gone.
Penny for your thoughts, should I continue or just stop? The next chap will have BellaGabe interaction but if you guys want I can just do some magic and make it dissapear...like a bunny, so just say the word