Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note and I'm making no cash off this. Quotes go to The Libertines, Arthur Conan Doyle, and the Bible.

Note: I can't write L so I'm writing this to practice. I've stayed as factual as I can but I may have taken some liberties here and there, filling in gaps to help it along. Mostly this is pointless introspection. And Matsuda shows up too much I know. But I like love him. The quotes at the beginning are a last minute additional on a whim. Not trying to get religious on you, if that comes across, I just like them.

Mainly it's just L though. Being all…L-ey. The way he does. Basically follows him from starting the Kira case to his death. I'd be interested to know if my 'L writing skills' increase as the story goes on. That's what I'm hoping for, anyway.

x

Deus Ex Machina

"The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong…but time and chance happen to them all."

"Oh my friend you haven't changed, you're looking rough and living strange."

"There but for the grace of God goes Sherlock Holmes."

Case work. Murders and mysteries like something out of a detective novel, except this was better than a novel, this was real - this was L. The prodigy, the genius, the legend. The cursive font and the distorted voice. The lines of solutions and the stretching death rows.

Piles of sweets, stacks of cakes, and answers, answers to puzzles that had the other 'greatest minds' baffled, but that L, almost smugly, knew he could take to an orphanage in Winchester and have solved in minutes.

Not that he needed to.

And then -

Kira.

Criminals were dying, heart attacks. It's impossible to kill someone with a heart attack. You couldn't poison that many people, and you couldn't -

L's mind was already whirring, thoughts clicking into place, ideas and strategies playing out against each other. He reached for his cell phone, holding it to his ear as it started to ring.

It was time for L make a move.

-

"Watari."

"Yes, L?"

Bar the speakers, the hotel room was empty. Six empty teacups were scattered on the table.

"What did you think of them?"

A pause, as the elderly man moved forward and began to gather up the cups, stacking three and taking them over to the cabinet next to the bathroom. He returned to the table, and his charge tilted his head upwards, staring at him with owlish eyes.

"Well? I'm interested in your opinion. These are the people on whom I shall have to rely if I wish to catch Kira."

Watari smiled, pouring more tea for L before collecting the remaining cups. "I did not believe I would ever see the day when you told me you relied on someone."

L's mouth curved into a small smile. "I rely on you, Watari."

"I sometimes wonder," the man replied, and the words were sarcastic but his tone was fond.

"But you still haven't answered me. What do you think of our NPA investigators?"

Watari placed another bowl of sugar cubes on the table. "I find them to be interesting people," he said.

"That's a very careful answer. Surely you can be honest with me?"

"Hm. In that case…I am afraid I am, overall, less than impressed."

L started dropping sugar cubes into his tea "Oh, I don't know. They definitely seemed passionate. And Yagami-san certainly seems very competent. I also believe Mogi-san to be someone who can be relied upon."

"I did say 'overall'."

"Of course. I should have known better than to overlook something you say, Watari," L quipped, the small smile back in place.

"After sixteen years, you should."

"Sixteen years…" L muttered reflectively, stirring his tea slowly. "Do you know, that man Matsuda…he is a year older than I am. It's strange how little age comes into it, in the end, after the importance we give it when we are young. How old is it to leave Wammy's, now?"

"Fifteen."

"Fifteen. Why not sixteen? Seventeen? Twelve? Ages are arbitrary…especially when you are faced with people like this."

"You mean Matsuda?"

"Yes, and Ukita-san. Of all of us, now, I am the youngest. However, I have already accomplished more in the last few years of operating as a detective than they are likely to achieve in their entire lives." L spoke without arrogance or inflection, he said the words as if they were as solid and factual and the china cup before him.

"You have said it yourself, age means very little when you come down to it. Why are you thinking about it?"

L raised a thumb to his mouth and watched grains of sugar swirling near the surface of his tea. "I'm not sure. I suppose it's simply that I'm not used to working with people."

Without explaining how his answer was connected to the question, he lifted his tea, and began to drink. Watari watched him for a few seconds, and then turned into the bathroom, starting to wash out the cups.

"But you are right," L said suddenly, raising his voice to be heard over the churning of tap water. "Overall, there is not much that is impressive about them."

"Perhaps, though, that is what we need for this case."

L raised his cup again, and after inspecting the contents, drank what was left of his tea. Meeting the remaining members of the Japanese task force had certainly been…illuminating. But even the rudimentary profiles he had begun building up were beginning to surprise him.

"You are probably right, Watari. As usual."

-

Naomi Misora was dead.

That was the conclusion L had made.

Granted, there was no body, and the only information they had received was that she had gone missing several days before. Nevertheless, despite his initial uncertainty as to where he remembered the name from, L now recalled that case in immaculate detail. He recalled Misora's part in it.

Naomi Misora would have contacted them by now.

And she hadn't, and they were dealing with a killer who could deal a deadly blow with just a name and a face as weapons, so he had concluded that Misora was dead.

It was a conclusion that depressed him. He returned his attention to the monitors in front of him.

"Ah, your wife appears to wish to take a bath, Yagami-san. I will avert my eyes, if you promise to

tell me if she appears to be killing criminals," he said, raising his hands over his eyes, so that he could only see the monitors on the far left of the display.

Yagami shot him a look. "I highly doubt my wife is Kira, Ryuzaki."

"Still, I won't watch if you promise to inform me of any odd behaviour."

The cop sighed. "That's really the best I can expect, I suppose. Thank you."

"I do not wish to invade your family's privacy. However the chance that Kira is a member of your household cannot be ignored." He felt the man shake his head, and slump his shoulders, and felt compelled to add, "It's far from a certainty, though."

"I only hope Matsuda-san and Aizawa-san are watching the Kitamuras properly," Yagami said, veering the conversation onto other matters.

"I believe that Aizawa is."

A chuckle. "You don't have much faith in Matsuda, then?"

"I am sure he is a fine police officer…in his own right," the dark-haired detective said, plucking a candied fruit off the plate in front of him. "However, I do not place much faith in his observational skills, no."

"He does tend to overlook things that are really glaringly obvious every now and again," Yagami conceded.

L selected another fruit, before offering the plate to the other man. He declined, and L popped the fruit into his mouth. "Yet you seem be more sure of his abilities. Is Matsuda-san hiding his capabilities from me?" he mumbled round his mouthful.

"Ha, of course not, Ryuzaki. But you're right. I value him as an officer and…" he trailed off, looking for the word. "I don't know if I could use the word 'friend'. I suppose the truth of it is…he's ended up becoming kind of like a son to me."

L tilted his head and pointed at the monitors. "But you have a son, Yagami-san."

"I know. But Light and Matusda…well, you've been watching him for two days, you'll admit that they're not exactly similar."

L turned his attention to the monitor showing Light bent over his desk, scribbling furiously, and glancing across at his books every few seconds. "Yes…I find it difficult to imagine Matsuda-san putting this much effort into study. I am afraid I am at a loss as to why you think he is so useful."

Yagami smiled. L frowned.

"You really don't understand, Ryuzaki?"

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise," L replied, sounding confused.

"Of course not…well, I'll see if I can explain. The thing about Matsuda is…he's honest."

"I would think that you are honest too, Yagami-san, unless you're deceiving me?"

Yagami laughed. "It's a different kind of honesty. You can tell the truth and still be guarded…but Matsuda, he's not like that. He's easier to read than a picture book on most days, even for someone like me, who's not so adept at reading people. He's got his sense of right and wrong and if you get him on your side, he's not going to leave it."

L frowned. "That seems to be more of a drawback. It opens him up for being used - he could be read, manipulated, and would know no better than to follow his manipulator anywhere he went. It is more a kind of stupidity than usefulness."

Yagami shook his head. "I should have expected you to say that," he said. "But when you've been in this job as long as I have, someone with that much loyalty, enthusiasm and openness…it's refreshing, and you learn how to count on them."

L watched Yagami for a few moments, as if trying to uncover more of Matsuda's personality from the lines in the other man's face. Eventually, he turned back to the monitors, and raised his thumb to his mouth. They had a job to do, after all.

-

It was not long before L noticed that he was watching Matsuda more and more. For the first few moments after he realised this, he felt surprised by the attention he was paying to the man. Then, the conversation he had had with Yagami replayed itself in his mind, and he remembered how the seeds of curiosity had been sown.

So that was why he had been watching Matsuda. And now that he recalled the purpose behind the action, he would be able to quickly solve whatever was left of the puzzle.

He glanced back at the man, who was amusedly poking his belt. Suddenly, Watari's phone started to ring.

"Ah!" Matsuda gasped, jumping backwards. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean -"

As Aizawa started to yell at Matsuda, L wondered if describing Matsuda as a puzzle was oxymoronic.

-

A couple of days later, L decided that he liked Aizawa. The man was practical, and he was dedicated. He was nowhere near the detective in terms of intelligence, but he picked things up quickly and he had a tendency to ask the right questions. He had a stupid hairstyle, but, inspecting himself in a spoon, L decided he couldn't really talk much about that kind of thing.

-

Perhaps they hadn't really expected to lose one of their own.

They must have known the dangers. They came into this ready to risk their lives, and they'd already reached past the confines of the law and into the methods operating in L's world. They had to have been prepared for this.

But Ukita's death had hit the taskforce harder than expected.

No one had had time to take it in, at first. Aizawa had reacted with anger, Matsuda with shock, Mogi with a deepening frown. And Yagami…

Yagami had reacted by driving a truck into a television studio. But that had been helpful to the case, so L didn't mind that reaction so much. He'd taken more precautions than Ukita, and L had had time to bring in protection for him, so he was still alive. Unless he had another non-Kira related heart attack.

Although, L mused, was anything 'non-Kira' these days?

Hours later, no one had gone home. Watari brought in the usual tea and cakes, along with several plates of sandwiches. It had been a long day and no one seemed about to leave, and L understood that his ability to survive on pure glucose was not shared by many of the people he met.

"I can't believe he's dead," Aizawa said, as the plates clinked against the table. His voice was hoarse, probably from all the shouting he had been doing earlier.

Almost mechanically, Matsuda reached out and picked up a sandwich, muttering a thanks to Watari. Then his arm dropped, and the hand holding the sandwich fell to his side.

"Aren't you hungry, Matsuda-san?" L asked curiously.

Matsuda looked up. "Huh? Oh - sorry. I guess -" He stared at the sandwich, as if not sure of how it had gotten into his hand. He realised L was still looking at him, and shifted uncomfortably. "Do you think his parents know yet?" he asked suddenly.

Aizawa frowned, his eyes still a little unfocused. Things were slowing down. Their next moves had been calculated. The videos had been reviewed. Everyone was done for the day. But they were still there.

"I d'no…" he said. "I guess they might have seen…?" He left the statement hanging.

Even L conceded that watching your child die on television would be a horrible thing to experience.

Matsuda shook his head. "He - Ukita always talked about his parents like they didn't even know how to use a toaster. We don't know if - they probably don't even know -"

"So someone needs to tell them," Yagami said, speaking up for the first time in a while.

"I will, if you guys want," Matsuda offered. "I can go up there tomorrow…if Ryuzaki will give me the day off?" He aimed this as a question towards L.

L let his gaze slide from Matsuda to Aizawa and back again, before answering. "Please don't be stupid, Matsuda. There is now a killer on the loose who can kill with just a face. If you would like to suffer a fatal heart attack, by all means, make your position on this task force obvious by visiting Ukita-san's relatives." His tone was calm, but the words were scathing and laced with distaste. "For the same reason, I would like to strongly advise you against attending the funeral."

"What?!" Aizawa was on his feet, fists clenched. A china cup tumbled, and smashed on the floor. "We couldn't go to help him out, we can't go comfort his parents, we can't even go to his funeral?!"

"No," L said, "you are perfectly able to do those things. If you choose to, however, I would ask that you leave this task force, and that you prepare your affairs in the likelihood that you are killed."

"But Ryuzaki," protested Yagami. "Surely other officers that worked alongside him will attend? Wouldn't it look suspicious if it's just us that don't show up?"

"I hardly think it would be just you, Yagami-san. And as I said, you are free, if you choose, to attend the funeral. But from that point on, I would request that we no longer work together."

"So in effect, you're saying it's you or Ukita," Aizawa said, his voice thick and low, as he moved across to practically tower over L.

The detective looked up at him, the picture of innocence. "If that is how you wish to interpret it."

For a moment, L was sure Aizawa was going to punch him.

For a moment, Aizawa was going to.

Then, he unclenched his fists. "Then I choose Ukita."

Yagami stood up. "Aizawa," he said, calmly and heavily. "This is not about choosing between Ukita and Ryuzaki."

Aizawa turned to him, jaw set and eyes burning. "I think it is. I think that's what this whole thing is going to end up being about - choosing to follow this guy -" he jerked his head towards L "- in all his mad schemes, or choosing to go by the law and to honour the people that give up their lives for this case!"

Seconds passed and tension was palpable on the air, crackling from Aizawa and ricocheting off Matsuda's anxious face, and Yagami's strained one. It fizzled impotently against L's calm exterior.

"Ukita is dead," Yagami said quietly. "He died because of this case. Because he wanted to catch Kira. You may not like him and you may not agree with his methods, but Ryuzaki is the single most capable person in the world when it comes to this kind of thing. If you want to honour Ukita, if you want to pay your respects to him, you'll put your skills towards his, and you'll catch Kira."

"We can't even go to his funeral," Aizawa replied, sounding choked.

"So we'll hold a memorial indoors." Yagami cast a defiant look at L, as if challenging him to deny them this.

"That's fine with me," L said impassively.

"Aizawa?"

Aizawa nodded. His shoulders sagged. "Chief…you're right. I just - I'm sorry. But Ukita -"

Yagami laid a hand on the other man's shoulder. "It's alright. I admire you for being able to stay with this despite everything. Thank you."

L cocked his head to the side as Aizawa slumped into a chair, looking drained. Yagami seemed to have knack for diffusing situations like this, even turning them into something that seemed positive. As he studied Aizawa's exhausted figure, he came to a conclusion.

He definitely liked Aizawa.

-

L had come to understand the task force. On some days he believed that he had even come to like them. From Yagami's strength and integrity to Aizawa's explosive determination, the four remaining members seemed to make up parts of the same whole. Where Mogi was taciturn and steadfast, Matsuda was chatty and flighty, and though these qualities didn't seem at place in the investigation, they had their uses. When frustrations mounted, Matsuda would say something inappropriately exuberant, and they would be crushed out in snipes and glares directed at the young detective. Matsuda, in his near-unshakeable enthusiasm and innocence, would apologise and fetch coffee and the feelings would dissipate, and work would continue.

And there was Yagami's ability to make everyone feel like they were contributing as much as L himself was, even though it was blatantly untrue and the career-cop probably knew it. But the older man gauged moral and kept it steady, making sure no one buckled under the strain. L knew that he wouldn't be able to deal with the clashing personalities so skilfully, and he harboured no wish to be able to. He was, however, glad that someone was managing to keep the peace.

L rewound the footage he was watching and played it again. On screen, Ukita collapsed in death throes. Watari approached from behind, and laid a platter of sweets in front of him.

L tipped his head back and looked up at his mentor. "We were wrong, Watari."

"Hm?"

"There is something impressive about them."

-

Light Yagami was not like the task force at all.

He was younger than Matsuda, and a thousand times more mature. Light didn't guess, he calculated, and when he was pleased, he would smile slightly, but he'd never jump up and down and say 'yay'.

He had - or at least purposefully displayed - sparks of the same integrity his father had, but he was not and never would be Soichiro Yagami. This boy read people and used what he learnt to manipulate the world into being what he wanted it to be. Yagami read people and used it to stop them feeling worn down and broken.

He could have surpassed Mogi in efficiency, but he spoke far too much and liked the sound of his own voice. He talked when it was unnecessary, and L was sure that eventually all this reasoning and twisting would lead him to slip up.

And he was not like Aizawa at all. The fiery passion that flared up in the man was nothing like the cool, hard determination that hung as a scent around the boy, and the selfish brilliance radiating from him, brittle under his skin, was completely unlike Aizawa's dedication to avenging his fallen friend.

Light Yagami was something completely different. He was the kind of person who'd volunteer himself for confinement or put on a show of hiding porn magazines when his father was watching - oh, L knew that Light had known about the cameras, he knew from the way his hand hesitated on the door handle and every shred of genius he'd seen from the boy since that a piece of paper in the crack of the door was not the only measure Light had in place for his privacy.

He was the kind of person…L might have ended up being.

L did not like Light, and he did not trust him, so he called him friend and began to watch his back.

-

Light Yagami is Kira.

No, he can't be. Listen to the way he talks. You heard him before the confinement, you can hear him now. It's different.

Light Yagami was Kira, and Kira's power has passed to someone else.

Kira was using Light Yagami?

No, because Light is too smart for that.

So Light is Kira and Light passed Kira's power to someone else.

But Light's insistence that he's not is very genuine, very impassioned. And he does not seem to want to use Misa or manipulate her, like the Light I knew before would have.

Light Yagami has lost his memories of being Kira?

Gone for good?

No, because Light Yagami is far too smart for that.

L bit his thumb. What if everything they were doing was playing into this boy's trap?

"Hey, Ryuzaki, take a look at this."

Then a sheaf of papers was shoved under his nose, and the hunt for the Yotsuba Kira continued.

Even if that was exactly what Kira wanted.

L was out of other options.

-

In reality, there had been a ninety-five percent chance that Matsuda would have actually died faking his death. L decided not to tell Matsuda this at the time, and concluded that it was a fact better kept to himself anyway.

"Breaking into the Yotsuba building was extremely dangerous, and stupid," he informed the detective as he placed a mug of coffee in front of L.

"I know," Matsuda said brightly. "But now we know for sure Yotsuba's behind it! And I know I was in danger, but with you behind me, Ryuzaki, it's difficult to stay worried for long afterwards." He grinned and headed back to his computer.

Light rolled his eyes at the departing figure, reaching to take a sip of his own coffee. The handcuffs jingled.

L didn't roll his eyes. Inwardly, though, he smiled a little. It was funny, what a little faith could do to you.

-

L had met several psychiatrists over the course of his lifetime. Most had tried to unravel his personality, becoming infuriated by what they described as his 'attempts to hinder psychological progress' and Watari described as his ' personality'. He wondered what they would make of it if he told them that one of the best nights of his life was also one of the worst, and that that night involved several murders, a police chase, tinted windows and mortal danger.

Nothing beat the thrill of closing in on a suspect.

Nothing was worse than one slipping out of your grasp.

The evening had been…

…exhilarating.

Plans, hurried and precise arrangements, frantic last-minute preparations blending into a toppling screen and a horrified looking Matsuda. Distorted voices played out over radio waves and convenient phone calls from co-workers. Higuchi in his car, tearing down the motorway. Higuchi thumbing through Matsuda's folder. Higuchi talking to himself - to a shinigami - back in his car. Aizawa riding in with the cavalry in a show of solidarity and dedication that took the wind out of him.

The Death Note.

Light's yell. Higuchi's death. The shinigami.

The handcuffs coming off.

Misa being released.

Higuchi was not Kira. At best, he was a proxy, at worst, a manipulated fool.

The highs and the lows crashing together and blending into one thing: depression.

Back to square one.

-

Kira was killing again. Higuchi was dead, and Amane was free, and Light wasn't handcuffed, and they had possession of a Death Note…

And Kira was killing again.

L was not stupid. Objectively, he might describe himself as 'as far from stupid as humanly possible'. So the patterns clicking into place behind the scenes were becoming obvious to him.

The only thing in the way was the 13 Day rule. But…things about that rule struck L as odd. It was too convenient. And the number 13 had too many superstitions attached to it, anyway. Forty seconds and six minutes and twenty-three days, they all seemed arbitrary, and therefore, believable. But thirteen…thirteen had connotations. And that made is seem artificial.

Watari was making preparations for that. It would be tested.

It would probably be too late.

Light Yagami is Kira. Light Yagami was Kira, and then Kyosuke Higuchi was Kira, and now Light Yagami is Kira again. And the Second Kira was Misa Amane.

And the shinigami paused whenever it was asked certain questions, and at those points, Light would always jump in with an answer…

The shinigami was probably allied with one or both of the current Kiras. Light and Amane, and the shinigami covered in bandages, like some sick perversion of the Holy Trinity.

"Ryuzaki? What're you doing up here?"

L turned around. It was Matsuda.

"Matsuda-san," he greeted him, inclining his head. "I was…" he left the sentence hanging, realising he wasn't sure what he was doing up here. "I was going to go outside for a while. To get some air. It can get very stuffy downstairs, with the computers."

"Yeah, but…it's never bothered you before." Matsuda frowned, and climbed the few steps between them, closing the distance. "Ryuzaki, are you okay? Are you sick or something?"

"I'm fine," he said, inclining his head as gratitude for the concern.

"It's a downpour outside. You go out there, you'll get soaked," Matsuda continued, sounding more worried than made sense to L. "Are you sure you're okay?" He brought up his hand and brushed the hair off L's forehead, pressing his palm against his head. "Well, you don't feel warm."

"That's because I'm not sick," L said, looking across at Matsuda, and making no motion to move his hand.

"If you're sure…" Matsuda bit his lip, clearly not convinced, and stuck his hands in his pockets. "Oh, hey, Light was looking for you."

"Was he?" L said, and his tone was flat, devoid of emotion or interest. "If you see him, do not tell him where I am. Let him find me on his own. I have no doubt that he will…but I shall hopefully manage to achieve a few moments of peace before then."

"Peace? I thought you and Light were friends?"

"Oh…of course." He pushed the door to the roof open, and a cold wind rushed in to whip around them. Matsuda shivered. L didn't move.

For a moment, the conversation ceased, and what might have been silence was ripped with wind and dashed with rain. It was cold, and out of the corner of his eye, L could see Matsuda's breath beginning to mist white as he exhaled. He wondered vaguely why his didn't do the same. Maybe he'd already stopped having any.

"Matsuda-san," he said, "Thank you for working with me on this case."

Matsuda blinked, surprised by this sudden change of conversation, but he seemed to recover quickly. "N-no problem, Ryuzaki! I'm just - well, kind of honoured to get this chance to work with you. And it's definitely our best bet at catching Kira!"

L tilted his head and looked at Matsuda. Rain was blowing in, and strands of his hair were starting to stick to his face. Idly, L reached up and pushed them away. Matsuda looked a little bewildered at the sudden contact.

"I don't think I will catch Kira."

"Huh? Where's this coming from all of a sudden?! I mean, you're L! Uh, Ryuzaki, that is."

L turned to face the rain. "Yes, I am. And when I die, that name will die with me, I suppose."

"Ryuzaki…" Matsuda's voice was quiet, and soft. "Don't talk like that. Don't think like that. You're not going to die."

"We're all going to die, Matsuda-san."

"But not soon!"

The ferocity in the man's tone made L turn back to him. Matsuda had clenched his fists and clenched his jaw, and was looking more determined than L remembered seeing for a long time.

Or perhaps he just hadn't been watching.

He could have been. He remembered thinking that Matsuda was a very interesting thing to watch.

"Okay. Not soon."

And just like that, Matsuda's tenseness had evaporated into a lopsided grin. "Good! The task force'd be lost without you!" Then, he added, "Though Aizawa and Mogi and the Chief are really good at what they do…it's just me, I guess." He laughed. "But hey, you can't leave us now, right? We need you!" His grin widened.

L dug his hands deeper into his pockets.

"I think I have enjoyed working with you, Matsuda-san. I apologise for calling you an idiot so much." L studied the man's face for a few seconds in silence, taking in the eager eyes and genuine smile. "I believe I understand what Yagami-san tried to tell me once now."

Matsuda was confused again. "Tried to tell you? What, about me? What did he say?"

L smiled. "He said you were honest," he said simply, and walked out into the rain.

For a second, he thought Matsuda was going to follow him.

-

Red lights flashed and alarms screeched and the pressure in his chest was unbearable.

People were yelling. That was…that was the task force, right?

Watari was dead by now.

Light was leaning over him.

Light Yagami…

Light had an arm behind his back and Light was smiling and Light was KiraI knew it.

I wasn't wrong.

I…But…

…but in the end he had let them down.

-

There was a body on the floor, and when that body had been a person, it had been attached to a letter, an identity comprised of two pen strokes. It had thought and it had fought and it had kicked and screamed until it made its impact on the world and it had sat and watched things as coolly as ice, and even more calmly.

It was growing cold again now, as heat seeped into the floor, and it was as calm as ever, lying serenely and silently as panic raged above it. No more thinking and no more fighting. There was simply stillness.

Transmission:

L is dead.

-

A living dog is better than a dead lion

x

Note: That puppy was over 5000 words oh my God I wrote that in one sitting what am I doing with my life. I've come to a conclusion myself, having written this. I kind of really don't like L as much as I thought I did. Or, you know, at all.

Yeah that's a bit of an exaggeration. I guess I just don't see what all the fuss is about. I really hate Light though, but won't go into that now, because I will rant.

Few quick points to make: Ukita. L not letting them go to the funeral might seem severe and irrational, but he's really paranoid about death and Kira and such. That's my thinking anyway.

His dislike of Light. I'm aware that there's a certain…school of thought that believes these two are in love and really, genuinely friends and it's all fluff and sunshine. Which is valid, I guess (realised there I might be alienating readers, sorry if you're a Light/L fan oo). But in Death Note 13 (and I just spend ten minutes looking this up to prove my point, how sad is that) it says: "L Has No Friends? Answer: Nope. And when he says Light is his first friend that's a big lie. He never considers him a friend. He probably secretly thinks really negative things about him."

Proof. Well anyway I took that and ran with it.

And also, the raiiin scene at the end. Not in the manga, I checked, so if details are wrong it's because I'm too lazy to load up my dvd. But not too lazy to obsessively look for anti-Light/L proof. /logic. But anyway I wanted to have a Matsuda scene in there. FOR YOU MORNE. IOU proper L/Matsu when I learn how the hell to write it.

And yes I am fully aware that L/Matsu is even less likely than L/Light. I'm not a hypocrite, I don't support either. I support Matsuda and when one of my wonderful reviewers requests an L/Matsu story I'm more than willing to try it out.

Review, or this will all have been in vain. Just say "good L" or "crap L".

End of super long note. This fanfic has nearly killed me. Why did I do this.

I'm going to go watch Stargate.