Sorry it took me so long to update. I was trying to find a muse. I did end up rereading Eclipse and Breaking Dawn this weekend (whenever I could peel my eyes away from the Olympics) and it kind of refreshed my mind on the situation.
I forgot how much I hated Jacob in Eclipse and Breaking Dawn and how annoyed I was with his attitude and involvement, but I promise to be nice to him in future chapters.
Anyway, here it is. I can kind of understand why Stephenie did not spend much time on Bella's POV because not much is happening besides her being sick. I am working on coming up with something interesting before Jacob arrives, and I also want to develop more on the relationship between Rosalie and Bella. Also, I hope to experiment more with Edward's POV.
The conversation with Charlie went much smoother than I had expected.
"Hey Bells, it's good to hear your voice. How was your honeymoon?" Charlie sounded calm enough. He was probably playing cards.
"It was great Dad." I wanted to get the news out as quickly as possible and I fought the need to pause. "Look, there's something I need to tell you…"
Of course he was stubborn about the whole situation, and for a moment I thought he might get in his cruiser and come straight to the Cullen's home, but Carlisle calmed the situation. I was able to get back on the phone with him before he hung up.
"Dad, it's very important that you listen to Carlisle. I…I wouldn't want you to get sick because of me." My voice was strained; I was always such a bad liar.
"Are you sure Bells? Is something else going on? Maybe I should come over…" His voice was rough and stubborn.
"No! Please, dad… Just, call me every day and I promise I will talk to you as long as I am feeling well. Okay?" I was hoping the pain in my voice made me sound sick, rather than suspicious
I could fear the tears welling up in my eyes as I set the phone down on the couch. It was hard enough to tell Charlie I was sick, how would it be when I finally made the transformation into a vampire? From what I heard, I would probably not be able to even talk to Charlie for at least the first year. I would be a crazed Newborn, only after one thing… human blood.
I felt Edward's cold hands on my cheeks, wiping away the stream of tears. I allowed myself to collapse into his arms.
"Bella, you handled that very well." Edward pulled his long fingers through my hair, his voice low and soothing.
"It's just so hard to lie to him." My voice was barely a whisper through the tears but I knew he could hear me. "It isn't fair to him."
"I know, love." He kissed my hair. "But this is what you wanted, isn't it? It would come to this eventually, even with out this thing growing inside of you."
I cringed. I hated the way he called our baby a 'thing'. If only he could feel the baby moving, feel the life inside of me. I closed my eyes and pictured the baby boy in my dreams. Those green eyes, Edward's eyes… he was beautiful. He. Perhaps that was another meaning of the vivid dreams I had every night, our baby was a boy.
"Edward," My voice was still a whisper, "Our baby is going to be a boy, I know it. And he is going to be just as beautiful as you." I made an attempt at burying my face into his stone chest, taking in the scent of him.
Edward's voice sounded rough and almost pained when he spoke. "Maybe you should rest a bit, Bella. You'll need to try and eat something again in an hour or two, so the more relaxed you are the better."
I hated that he avoided talking to me about this, but there was not much I could do. He was gone so fast it was if he had never been there. I sighed and leaned against the arm of the couch. I pulled my knees into my chest and hugged my legs, fighting the urge to sleep. Why was this so difficult for Edward to accept?
I closed my eyes and gave in, my thoughts had become too worrisome.
I leaned my head against the wall in my room, anger boiling in my veins. How could she continue to call that thing a child? A baby boy!? She was delirious and stubborn about the situation and I needed to protect her. I needed to save her. I would not let this thing destroy her.
I could feel a growl rumbling low in my throat as my thoughts progressed and I suppressed it. How could I accomplish this? I knew I could convince Carlisle to help, he understood the severity of the situation. And even though Alice and Jasper had yet to voice their opinion to Bella, I knew they were as scared as I was. Maybe if Alice talked to Bella? Then there was Rosalie, selfish with the longing for a baby. She would let Bella die before she allowed harm to come to the baby. I blocked her thoughts as much as possible for fear that I might lunge at her throat. I hated her almost more than I hated the thing growing inside of Bella. And Esme, dear Esme. She sided with Bella, feeling a motherly pull to her. Of course, she could not forget her own human memories and the tragic death of her own baby, a death that brought upon her new life as a vampire. Last was Emmett, and he would stand by Rose, no matter what he thought.
I blocked out all of their thoughts today, not wanting to hear their opinions or fears. I pictured Bella in my mind, her hands folded protectively over her abdomen. I wanted to understand for her, but I couldn't. I heard it in Carlisle's thoughts, there was no way she would survive this and he could not put a timestamp on how fast this pregnancy would move. I could not bear to loose her. Not again.
"Edward." Rosalie's sharp voice rang through my room.
"Who said you could come in here?" My voice was sharp and cruel but I did not care.
"I'm here to talk for a minute, although you can probably read my intentions in my mind."
I had gotten so good at blocking her out these past couple days that her thoughts were transparent. I opened my mind up to them now, even though this was most likely a bad idea.
"I am here to tell you that I am not going to be leaving Bella's side until that baby is born, Edward. I can see it in your eyes, you are still plotting to remove the baby early and end what you think is her pain. I told Bella I would protect her and the baby and I plan to do just that. Esme and Emmett will stand by me as well, and I think you know that."
I snarled as her thoughts filled my head. "You don't even care about Bella! All you care about is your own selfish wish for a child of your own. The life you never had."
She smiled smugly at me and shrugged. "That does not matter to Bella as long as I am by her side. I will do whatever she needs from me to take care of that baby."
"SHE ISN'T YOURS TO PROTECT!" My voice was loud enough to fill the large house and I hoped I did not disturb Bella. I could here her gentle breathing downstairs and knew she had finally settled into sleep.
Rosalie turned her back and flipped her hair over her shoulder. She stalked out the door and hurried back to Bella's side. She had no more thoughts for me and I could tell my feelings meant nothing to her. All she cared about was that baby… that thing… growing inside of my sweet Bella.
My anger had not subsided and I started to worry I would do or say something I regretted soon. "Jasper. Emmett." Their names came out a whisper in my anger but I knew they would here.
One by one they entered my room. Jasper had a look of concern on his face as he took my mood in. Emmett strolled proudly and I doubted he minded my mood, it could mean for a good wrestling match if he was lucky.
I snarled through my teeth. "Let's hunt."
When I awoke darkness had settled over the forest outside. I sat up slowly and gasped.
"Bella?" Rosalie, who had apparently been sitting on the floor by my head, snapped up and placed her hand on my stomach.
"Sorry Rose, I didn't mean to startle you. It's just that… I feel so hungry, or something like that." I could not explain the feeling I had but I knew I was empty of the nutrients my baby needed.
She stood and disappeared, returning in a matter of seconds. In her hands she held a plate of toast and a glass of water. I looked at her disapprovingly but took the food anyway.
"Esme thought it would be best to try something less complex for your next meal. At least until you can keep food down." She patted my shoulder and sat back on the floor. Some action movie was playing on TV and she stared at it mindlessly.
I nodded too late for her to see and took a bite of the toast. It tasted awful in my mouth, almost having the same consistency as dirt, but I knew I need to get it down. It had been days since I kept any form of food in my body and I was already starting to feel weaker. I could only imagine the effect this was having on the baby. I took bite after bite slowly and washed it down with the glass of water.
"How do you feel?" Rosalie was aware that I had finished and her head was cocked to look at me.
I shrugged. "Fine, I guess." As if those words alone triggered a reaction, I felt pain building up in my stomach. I threw my hands over my mouth and stood to find the bathroom. My legs gave out but Rosalie had me in her arms before I hit the floor. We made it to the bathroom just in time for the horrible heaving to begin. How long would this last? I collapsed backwards and remembered that it was Rosalie would help my hair back tonight, not Edward.
"Rose, where's Edward?"
She held me next to the sink as I washed my face.
"He's hunting with Jasper and Emmett."
I felt somewhat startled that he had left but was glad he was still taking care of his own needs. I dried my face on a nearby towel and tried to pull myself vertical. Rosalie supported me against her side, mostly carrying me as we headed back to the couch. Carlisle and Esme we seated in a nearby love seat, both held books in their hands but did not seem to be reading a single word off the worn pages.
I could hear Rosalie murmuring something, her words to low and fast for my human ears. Carlisle nodded and flashed to my side.
"Bella, we need to find a way to get nutrients into you soon. I'm worried about the toll this is taking on your body."
I nodded, understanding his worry.
"Perhaps there are other foods we could try, experiment with what food my body is willing to expect. I am willing to try anything, Carlisle. Anything that will help keep this baby alive."
Carlisle exchanged a nervous look with Esme and nodded.
"We'll try again in an hour or two." He took a seat and opened his book back up, his worried eyes still on me.
I settled onto the arm of the couch again, pulling my body into a loose fetus position. I bit my lip as the baby moved inside of me, his kicks getting harder and harder. Would the pain get unbearable as time went on? What danger was looming in the future for the baby and I. I had to hope everything would be okay. Edward and I were going to be together forever. I had to survive this.